Purgatory
by JustCallMeMarly
Summary: FINISHED! Season 5 AU Cordelia has returned, sort of. She has been brought back to straighten out a few destinies... but what does Spike have anything to do with it?
1. Part I

_**Disclaimer:  This is a standard disclaimer.  I do not own **anything in the Angel-verse or Buffy-verse.  It all belongs to Joss Whedon and those associated with him.  The only thing that I claim is the story plotline.  Everything else, I'm borrowing and will return unharmed.  Trust me.**_

_**Summary : AU Season 5 - Cordelia has returned, sort of – she has been brought back to set straight a few destinies…but what does Spike have to do with any of it?_

_** A/N – Okay, so I'm a huge fan of Angel/Cordelia.  I am VERY upset about how things have been left.  I know that I'm going to get a lot of things wrong in this story and let's just say that it will be a slightly alternate universe.  I didn't watch much of season 4 and I've completely boycotted season 5 (although I did turn on the Reaper episode and watched a little bit)  because I'm so unhappy with the writers right now - that is the reason I'm giving for some things not being correct. The only thing I'm regretting about missing this season is Spike.  I love Spike and James Marsters.  But I have to hold firm…  Anyways – enjoy the first part of the story, and please let me know if I should continue! **  _

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Purgatory

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_Los Angeles__ – Wolfram & Hart compound_

"What a bloody wanker," Spike muttered to himself as he watched Angel delegate orders to his underlings.  The blond vampire/ghost rolled his eyes as he sat non-too-gently down on the couch in his grandsire's office.  The resulting commotion caused Angel to look over at him with a frown.

"Spike, you're a goddamn ghost.  Go haunt something," he said with a frown.  Spike grinned as he leaned back on the couch, putting his hands behind his head.

"I am," he said cheekily.  Angel's frown deepened before turning back to dictate orders to his secretary.  Spike shook his head with a sigh as he watched.  Angel had returned to his 'say-little-intimidate-much' days of yore.  The only time the solemn vampire said more that two simple sentences was when he was ordering the little lawyers around.  That thought caused Spike to frown.  It was another thing he didn't understand.  Angel had always been a poofter working for the forces of good.  Spike paused in his thought for a split second to mourn the memory of Angelus.  Bringing himself back from the self-imposed tangent, Spike stood a paced slightly.  Angel had always fought for good… but he had always fought alone.  It was safe to say that Angel was a loner.  That is, until he got hooked up with the cheerleader.  After that, the good fight had included friendship and loyalty.  Spike couldn't trace either of those in this new arrangement the souled vampire had.  Spike knew that Wolfram & Hart were baddies.  You didn't live for a few centuries and not figure that out.  He'd asked his grandsire what, exactly, he had to gain through all of paddy cake playing he was doing with the law firm.  All he'd received was a death glare, which if Spike hadn't already been as dead as he could get – can't ask more of a ghost vampire – he would have been 6 feet under and then some.  All Spike could do was shrug his shoulders and hope that this trip-traipsing through the Wolfram & Hart-like shadow lands of Hell was going to be worth it in the end.  But then again, what did it matter to him?  Spike was already halfway to Hell.  

With another heavy sigh at that thought, Spike made his way out of the office.  There were definite perks to being a non-corporeal form these days.  One being that there was practically no effort in getting from one place to the next.  Two – of course – is that being a ghost pretty much invalidates the vampire needing blood thing.  Boy, that was nice.  Not having to deal with the bloody demon.  There were other perks, just as there were drawbacks.  But he didn't like to dwell on them much.  Unlike his vampire counterpart, Spike didn't like the brooding bit.  Angel had been a brooder since the inclusion of his soul … and look where that got him.  Thrown smack dab in the middle as the ringleader of a bloody evil law firm.  Spike shook his head as he let the elevator take him to the basement.  There was one thing Spike didn't like, and that was being in the middle.  As he exited the elevator a thought came to him.  _There is no way in Hell – ha, funny, that – that I'm going to be stuck here.  I will find a way out of this.  And I will find a way by my bloody self.  I don't need those gits upstairs to find anything.  They've got their heads so far up their own arses that they couldn't find a way out of a damn paper bag_.  With a smirk to himself, Spike continued walking.  Now, in the meantime, if he could only figure out what to do with himself.  As he turned the corner, Spike found himself temporarily blinded as an unearthly glow suddenly burst in front of him.         

 "What the bloody hell?!" Spike cried, throwing his arms up to shield his eyes from the sudden, blindingly bright light.

"I come to you now at the turn of the tide…" a melodious, slightly familiar voice said.

"Can you stop with the blinding, twirly lighting for a moment?" he asked with a growl.  The sound of laughter almost echoed through the empty hallway.

"I always wanted to say that," the voice spoke of its earlier words.  The light slowly started to fade and the voice started to take a corporeal form.  Spike's jaw dropped as the shapely figure walked towards him.

"Cordelia?"

**_** Important side note -- The LotR: The _****_Two_********_Towers_****_ reference is borrowed only for entertainment.  No infringement intended. **_**


	2. Part II

Part II

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"Yep, it's me… in all my non-me glory," she said, doing a quick turn before stopping in front of the gaping ghost with a bright smile that rivaled the blinding beacon of before.

"Non-you glory?" Spike asked.  Cordelia nodded her head for him to follow her.  After a few twists and turns they came to a stop in front of a window.  Behind it lay a body: Cordelia's body.

"What's going on, luv?" Spike asked, concern marring his brow as he turned to look at her.  She smiled while watching herself lying comatose, but at what, Spike had no clue.

"I'm not a ghost like you, Spike.  I'm not dead," she explained.

"Well, that's bloody obvious," he declared, following her line of vision to the form lying motionless, attached to machines.

"Spike, I am just my soul," she said.  Spike cocked his head to one side.

"For us wee laymen, luv, you'll have to do better at the explaining than that," he said, crossing his arms.  Cordelia smirked, Spike's action reminding her of Angel.

"Walk this way," she said, a larger grin emerging over her face.  Spike shook his head as he followed her.

"Why you're just a wellspring of pop culture this evening, aren't you?" he said causing her to chuckle.

"At least you've lived enough in the twentieth century to get my references, unlike some vampires I know," she said.  Spike chuckled.

"Yeah, I can't really see Peaches sitting through the three-hour-per-epic glory that happens to be _Lord of the Rings," he said.  Cordelia laughed as well._

"Hey, Tolkien is classic.  It should be a no-brainer for him.  How he can sit through hours of Charleton Heston is totally beyond me.  Yet the classics come to big-screen and he turns his vampire nose up at them," Cordelia said with a roll of her eyes.  Spike smiled, but sobered quickly when he noticed Cordelia's drawn face.  Her eyes took in their surroundings with a quick, sad glance.

"There are things I don't pretend to understand," she muttered.

"That makes two of us, luv," Spike commented.  Cordelia smiled, but there was no humor in it.

"I was here once before.  These vary elevators," she said as she pointed to said object.  "It was before Angel's beige meltdown and he fired us.  We were trying to save him.  Fat lot of good it did us.  I only hope I can make a dent in him before it happens again."  Spike processed her words carefully.

"Are you saying that Angel is on his way to Looneyville again?" he asked.  Again Cordelia smiled.

"Your way with words astounds me," she shook her head.  Spike shrugged.

"I was a poet once," he said.  This caused Cordelia to laugh.  As she went to pat him on the shoulder, Spike's eyes went wide as her hand went right through him.

"Right, I forgot about that," Cordelia said, a shameful look on her face.  Spike's eyes narrowed as he concentrated on something.  Cordelia watched as he steadily reached out to touch her shoulder.  Again, his eyes went wide as his finger seemed to melt into her.

"A ghost to a ghost.  This is all very intriguing, luv.  I hate to have to point out that you seem to be falling behind in your explanations," he said, sticking his hands in the pockets of his duster.  Cordelia looked to the floor.

"There's a lot to explain, Spike.  Almost too much at this point.  Things will be revealed in time.  But right now, I am here to ask for your help.  You are going to play a pivotal part in the way the future is shaped.  Many people's destinies will depend on your future decisions," Cordelia said, clasping her hands in front of her earnestly and looking up into Spike's incredulous face.  There was silence for a few long seconds.

"Are you telling me that I, a freakin' vampire ghost, am going to have a significant impact on other people's lives?  While I'm stuck here in this cinderblock Hell?  My decisions will chart the course of other lives?" he asked.  Cordelia nodded.  Spike blew out a breath he didn't need to hold.

"That's an awful lot of information to just throw at me, princess.  What makes you so sure that I'm going to listen to anything anyways?  I have my own agendas here," he said almost belligerently.  Cordelia shook her head.

"Who says your agenda and the Powers' agenda are so very different?" she asked.  Spike looked at her quickly before starting to pace.  After another silence filled second, he stopped and turned to look at her.

"What about you, luv?  What are you getting out this mess?" he asked as he thought back to the body still lying back in the care unit.  "And I must admit, you are bloody good at evading questions.  I don't think you've answered one straight out yet."  Cordelia shrugged.

"I'm explaining as best as I can, Spike.  I can't tell you what's going to happen.  It's against the rules.  I can only give you certain pieces of information and hopefully you can piece together enough to come to some very important decisions," she said.

"I still want an answer to the question about you, luv.  What happens to you?" he asked.  Cordelia turned away.

"I didn't know you cared, Spike," she said.  Spike let out a humorless chuckle.

"There seems to be a lot that most people didn't know about me," he said, causing Cordelia to turn back to him.

"Spike, you're a better man than you think you are," she said.  Spike shook his head.

"You forget, luv.  I'm not a man.  I was a demon… and now I'm a bloody ghost."  Cordelia stepped close to him, her brown eyes boring into his blue.

"You _were_ a man, Willliam," she said with an edge to her voice.  "You were a man – a better man than anyone had the brains to see.  It was that man that beat out the nature of the demon to fight the good fight – without a soul.  It was that man that rose to the surface to find the strength of will to fight for a soul.  You are the only demon in _history_ to ever reach those heights.  The Powers call all demons 'lower beings'.  You've transcended that, and you've risen above the standards of most human beings.  That in itself deserves a little acknowledgement, don't you think?"  Silence fell again as the blond ghost thought over Cordelia's words.  She watched him and immediately felt bad for him.  This man… pirey ghost had a lot to deal with.  She knew that he was having problems finding his purpose.  That was why she was here.  But she also knew that over the past few years, those insecurities had been enforced by many people… the primary offenders being her former employer/best friend and the Scoobies.  Falling in love with Buffy Summers had been the worst thing that Spike could have ever done.  Cordelia let an internal _Pffft_ echo through her head at that though.  Falling in love with Buffy Summers seemed to be a common affliction in the fanged undead, and all it did was cause them to be miserable.  With a swift shake of her head, Cordelia brought herself back to the present.  Spike was pacing again, but she knew he'd been silent the whole time.

"Spike," she said, calling his attention to her.  When his eyes met hers, she smiled.  "We've already got a brooding vampire.  I didn't come here to create another one.  I came here to tell you that you are worth a hell of a lot more than you think you are and that my purpose is to make sure it is proven to you."  Spike thought over those words and finally nodded.

"Well, then.  Now that I've channeled the title brooder, I'm worn out.  Bloody hell, I could use a cigarette," Spike said, running his hand through his hair.  Cordelia grinned.

"A drawback to being Casper?" she asked.  Spike rolled his eyes.

"I'm trying not to think of those," he said.  Cordelia knew that despite the light banter, there still were questions rolling around in the peroxide blond head.  Silence fell again.

"I know all of this is a lot to think about, and I'm sure there's a little anxiety mixed in.  Just know that I will be here to help you through all of this," Cordelia tried to comfort.

"What happens after that?" he asked.  Cordelia debated whether or not to give him a straight answer.  She decided to be honest.

"I don't know," she said.  Spike nodded.

"I guess that may mean a little research is in order then," Spike said good-naturedly.  A warmth spread over Cordelia.

"I suppose a visit to Wesley wouldn't hurt," she said, the hope at seeing her friend and the love for him shining in her eyes.  Spike smiled.

"Then let's get to it," he said as he pressed the elevator button and the two waited.         

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Wesley sat back in his chair.  After going through his department reviews he knew that things were going to be hectic.  A week ago the group had found a pair of dusty books hidden away in the apartment of a now-deceased Ralsak demon.  The Ralsaks were a protective race.  They were usually hired out as a security measure for objects or value or even people.  In this particular case, the Ralsak had been killed before it could reveal to Gunn and Angel what it was protecting.  It had been a mark against the gang of Angel Investigations that the Ralsak had died under their watch, but it was a success in that the cultists guilty of the murder had not found their desired object.  After weeks of searching, the Wolfram & Hart crew had struck pay dirt earlier that day.  Wes had immediately sent the unknown texts down to the labs to have them studied.  He hoped to go over them himself once he had the time.  And now, with the rest of the pending cases delegated, he was anxious to take a look at them.  With a sigh, the ex-watcher sat back, pushed his glasses up onto the top of his head and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"You keep rubbing it like that, you're not going to have anything left," a voice broke into the Englishman's reverie.  Wesley sat up straight, startled.

"What the…?!" Wesley started, then when he saw who it was he relaxed.  "Spike.  Could you possibly do _something_ to announce your arrival besides just popping in and frightening the devil out of us?"  Spike just smirked.  Cordelia, well aware that Wesley couldn't see her, frowned at the man's appearance.  His 5 o'clock shadow was turning into more of a 10 o'clock overgrowth.  His eyes were tired and bloodshot.  His normally up kept appearance was rumpled and untucked.  She frowned as she took in a different Wesley than she had known before.  Gone were the apathy and the lingering traces of the beige period of his own.  In its place were exhaustion, reserve, and a caution that Cordelia had never seen before in the ex-watcher.  It was almost as if he had reverted to his old, high school version of himself.   Minus the shrieking and insecurity, of course.

"Tell him he looks like hell, Spike," she ordered her ghostly companion.  Spike frowned, quickly glancing at her out of the corner of his eye.  Wesley shifted in his seat.

"Well, Spike?  Are you just going to stand there and glower, or do you have something of importance to say?" the man asked.

"You look like hell, mate," Spike commented for Cordelia, and himself.  Wesley's frowned turned up for a second in a moment of amusement.

"It's always good to know that there is always someone around to keep the spirits up," he said.  Cordelia smiled softly at her friend.

"Oh Wes, I wish I could hug you right now," she said softly.  Spike looked at her again.

"What next?" he hissed out softly.  Cordelia looked over at him and indicated to the empty chair in front of Wes' desk.  Spike rolled his eyes, but he took her hint.  Wesley watched warily as the ghost seated himself.

"So, any new prophecies of late?" the blond man asked nonchalantly, causing Wes' eyebrow to go up.  Spike shifted uncomfortable.  "Any rabble rousing baddies to go tell to bugger off?"  Again, Wes just looked at him.  "Come on, Watcher.  I'm trying to make conversation here!"  Wesley sighed.

"When have you ever been much of a conversationalist?" he asked.  Cordelia laughed.

"How can you ask that when Spike's been known never to shut up?!" she asked, clutching her stomach.  Spike narrowed his eyes at her as she perched herself against the corner of Wes' desk.

"Well… maybe I've turned a stone," Spike said, rolling his eyes.  Wes shook his head.

"Not bloody likely.  What do you need Spike?  We have people working on your situation – in fact, Fred has been adamant about continuing on with it," he said as he sat forward, leaning his elbows on the desk.  Cordelia's eyebrow lifted at the mention of Fred.  Well, that would have to be information stored for later.  Knowing that Spike was stumped about what to say next, she leaned forward.

"Ask him about any new acquisitions," she prompted.  "To be more specific – books."  Spike took a breath.

"Any good reading come your way?  I'm looking for a good novel to help me nod off," Spike said.  Wesley's eyes narrowed at the question.  Cordelia glared at the man in front of her.

"Cut the bullshit, Spike!  Ask him if he's received any new texts!" she growled.  Spike smiled his regular smart ass smile in response to Cordelia and in wait of Wesley's answer.  With another growl, Cordelia reached forward, closed her eyes and put her hand against Spike's temple.  A flash of an image caused Spike to jerk back slightly.  In front of his eyes sat an ancient looking text – it was pale green, spineless, and held together by a giant metal clasp on the two ends.  There was a symbol on the front cover, but Spike couldn't place it.  When Cordelia was sure that Spike had received her message, she sat back.  His eyes were wide as he stared at her for a second.  Wesley, who'd noticed Spike's reaction, was now watching him with a concerned look.  After a moment, Spike focused his now-serious eyes on Wesley.

"Did you receive a pale green text with two giant metal clasps made of iron?  It had a symbol smack dab in the middle of the cover.  It looked ancient – before my time."  Wesley's eyes widened.

"How did you know…" he started.

"I don't know… but do you have it?" Spike interrupted.  Wesley being speechless was enough answer for Cordelia.

"It's down in the lab," she said as she hopped off of the desk and made her way to the door.  Spike stood up as well.

"Wait – Spike!  Where are you going?" Wesley asked, hopping up and watching almost helplessly as Spike made his way after Cordelia.

"Nowhere, mate.  I have to look for some answers of my own before I can do anything," he said.  With that, he disappeared out of the door, leaving Wesley dumbfounded in his office.

"Slow down, cheerleader!" Spike called after the brunette.  He ran as quickly as he could, his duster flapping noiselessly behind him.  Spike wasn't quite used to the lack of some vampire abilities.  There were a few he was still lucky enough to possess, but as the bloodlust disappeared, so did some of the perks.  Again – not dwelling.

"Cordelia!" he yelled again.  Cordelia stopped suddenly and turned back to him.

"Will you _not_ call my name out like that?  Everyone can hear you here, remember?  They hear you calling my name and… well, I don't know how well received that's going to be by some if they hear it," she said, hands going to her hips.  Spike stopped a few feet from her.

"You mean Angel, right?" Spike asked.  Cordelia became deadly still.

"What does Angel have to do with anything?" she asked.  Spike watched her closely.

"I think that might actually be a question for you, luv," he commented.  Her eyes became icy.

"It's really none of your business," she said.  Spike crossed his arms.

"It bloody well is if you're using me as a pawn to save his scowly little soul!" Spike exclaimed.

"What Angel does or doesn't do isn't a concern of mine.  I am here to save the world and a few people in the process.  If it includes keeping Angelus buried beneath Angel's soul, then so be it.  Consider it a productive, life-saving by product.  My mission is not Angel's soul.  Not right now," she said.  Spike's eyebrows lifted.

"Not right now?" he asked.  Cordelia glared.

"This subject is, as of right now, closed.  Veeeery closed," she said angrily.  "Now, since we're done talking, I'll meet you in the lab."  With that, she disappeared.  Spike looked around dumbly for a second before sighing, resigned.

"There's obviously a story there, luv.  And I'm going to hear it before I agree to helping anyone with anything – and that means you too, cheerleader," Spike said to no one before making his way to the stairs.    

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_**  Author's note:  Please let me know if you like it.  I also want to know if you don't like it.  Now – I know that there are a lot of Buffy/Angel lovers out there and I respect that.  This story has a planned Cordelia/Angel arc to it and I'm sorry if that offends anyone.  Just like the B/A people are entitled to their own opinion, my fellow C/A people and I are entitled to ours.  Because I welcome any type of criticism, it doesn't mean that I am opening the door for any hate mail concerning the pairing.  So, if you want to hate it because of that, please feel free to express it in a polite way… just keep the nasty opinions full of explicatives to yourself, if you have them.  I will respect you so much more for it.  Thank you and I hope you enjoy it anyways!**_


	3. Part III

** **Author's note:**  I want to give a large hug and huge thanks to all of the people who reviewed!  **Jadedrose01, Anne, Steph** – thank you so much for your kind words.  **Bitch Little Pixy **– I love the Spike and Cordelia characters as well.  I think they would be great together… but I am a C/A fan first.  Who knows, maybe I'll tinker in the C/S world as well… : )  As for Fred, I think I would like her with Wes.  Strange as I may feel about that, I think you are right about her and Spike.  I noticed that in the Reaper episode and it kind of creeped me out a little bit…  **Arba** – even though I said what I said above, I really am a B/S fan as well (I mean, come on, he got a soul for her!).  The writers could have delved into a very intriguing plot line with that couple, as well as the C/A plot line.  Oh well… we can all hope for it all to turn out right in the end.  All of you stay tuned, there is definitely more to come! **

Part III

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"What took you so long?" Cordelia asked as she leaned over the desired text.  Spike glowered, but she couldn't see him.

"Well, pardon me if your light show, verbal bombshells and revelations have made my concentration go down the shitter," Spike said angrily.  Cordelia stood up with a smirk.

"You had to take the stairs, didn't you?" she asked.  Her answer was in his huff and glare.  She laughed as she looked at the grumpy man.  "You know, you're concentrating too hard on the wrong things."

"You're telling me?  I was the one that ran into a bloody wall," he said, rubbing his forehead and causing Cordelia to laugh even harder.  "I appreciate your sympathy."  Cordelia shook her head as she sobered.

"I'm sorry, really.  But we have more important things to worry about right now than your inability to think as a ghost," she said.  Spike frowned.

"So, what do we have to worry about then?" he asked.  Cordelia's non-corporeal hands skimmed over the surface of the book in front of them.

"Stopping the coming apocalypse," she said, her eyes roaming the cover.  Spike rolled his eyes.

"Yes, of course, we _must_ have one of those," he said sarcastically.

"Saving a few souls," Cordelia continued. 

"Why, of course.  Now if only those measly souls could keep themselves out of trouble from here on out," Spike said with a heavy sigh as he leaned against the table.

"And in the process, save the world," Cordelia concluded as she stood up straight again.

"What's the world ever done for me?  Fuck the world," he said, not really meaning it.  Cordelia watched him with a close eye as he constructed his apathetic walls around himself.

"Fuck the world, Spike?  Now there's an attitude to take.  Especially since you're in the world…" Cordelia started.

"Yeah, and a bloody good world I'm living in," Spike interrupted.  

"… and so is Buffy," Cordelia concluded.  Spike shut his mouth, no witty comeback prepared for Cordelia's insight.

"Well, let's get to the world saving," he said, uncommonly quiet as he stood up next to her.  "What do I have to do?"  Cordelia refrained from commenting on the obvious subject of interest.

"Well, I need you to open this book," she said.  Spike rubbed his hands together in anticipation.

"As you command," he said as he reached out and concentrated on the book.  When he reached forward, his hand went right through the clasps.  It took a second for Spike to understand what had happened.  Cordelia huffed.

"Spike!  Concentrate!" she said.  Spike looked at her for a second before putting a finger to his forehead.

"I did, luv.  Let's try it again, shall we?" he asked before he reached for it again.  His hand went through it again.  With an impatient growl, Spike threw his hands at the book, each time his hand moving right through it.  He looked to Cordelia for any sort of assistance.  She was lost in thought, but sat up straight when an idea came to her.

"Try picking up something else," she commanded.  Spike rolled his eyes as he reached for a notebook at the end of the table.  

"Figures," Cordelia snorted when Spike held the notebook out to her.  She looked up to the ceiling.  "Why are you doing this to me?!  You showed me the book!  We're here!  Why won't you let us work with it?!"  Spike stepped back from her at her yell.  Silence filled the room.

"Are you expecting an answer, luv?" Spike asked, breaking the frustrated silence.

"Damn the Powers That Be… I don't know if I can take this anymore, I thought it had changed," Cordelia said, forlornly.  Spike sat down next to her and wished desperately that he could rub her dejectedly slumped shoulders.

"What can't you take anymore?  What changed?" he asked, hoping that talking about it would help her, since that was all he could offer.  A sudden noise caused the ghost to look up.

"Talking to yourself, Spike?" Angel's voice asked.  Spike heard Cordelia suck in a breath.

"Yeah, well, it alleviates the bloody boredom," he said, restraining from rolling his eyes.

"What are you doing down here?" the dark vampire asked as he descended the stairway into the lab.  Cordelia let out a short, strangled laugh.  Just like Angel to not sugar coat anything.  Straight to the point, as always.  Spike held out his arms.

"What?  Can't a restricted ghost take a tour of his home away from home?" he asked.  Angel crossed his arms and glowered, causing Cordelia to smile.

"Wesley informed me, rather hurriedly, that you were asking about that book.  And now that you are here… I guess you can say that I'm understandably suspicious," he said, his tone lowering to relay his mood.  Spike shrugged.

"I heard it was important.  So, I guess you can say that I'm understandably curious," Spike said, mocking his grandsire's tone.

"I'm going to ask you one more time, Spike," Angel growled.  Spike laughed.

"Or what, mate?  You're going to toss me out?  I'd like to see you bloody try, Peaches," he scoffed.  Angel stepped forward menacingly.  If Cordelia could step between the two men… pires she would.  Knowing it was fruitless, she sighed instead and stepped back to watch a centuries old rivalry of antagonism play out in front of her.

"I'd say your sought out solid body depends on this law firm and its resources.  What would happen if you pissed off the boss and he decided to cut your little project off?" Angel threatened.  If Spike had a blood flow, his face would have been red with anger.

"Sod off, you son of a bitch!  Just because you fucked up enough to pull the bloody purse strings of an _evil_ law firm does not give you rights to act like the bloody King of England!" he yelled.  "You are _not_ better than me!"  Cordelia watched with interest as the ghost hit one of the vampire's sensitive nerves.  "How Buffy ever loved you is beyond me!"  Cordelia winced as the second sensitive nerve was struck.  "And I can't begin to comprehend why the cheerleader gave up her bloody life for a stupid tosser like you!"  Strike three… you're out.  To describe the look on Angel's face as anger would be a supreme understatement.  Rather than say anything, Angel turned on his heel and left the confines of the lab, the ghost stewing in his own anger and the soul watching avidly.  The venting of the rage Cordelia had seen before came out as only a large crash from the other room.  She closed her eyes, not wanting to imagine what pricey piece of equipment had the misfortune of being in an angry vampire's path.

"Ding – round one," Cordelia said almost cheerfully as she stood up.  Spike looked over at her, a miserable look on his face.

"I didn't mean to blow my top like that," he admitted, finally calming down.  Cordelia smiled.

"I understand it's been a long time in coming," she said.  "You got it off your chest, Angel will brood about it and work through it, and everything will be sunshine and roses come tomorrow."  Spike raised and eyebrow.

"Okay, so maybe not sunshine… geez, don't take things so literally," Cordelia huffed.

"So what are we going to do about the book?" Spike asked.  Cordelia shook her head.  

"We have other things to worry about…" she said.  The telltale tingle in her spine told her something wasn't right.  Her prediction came true when an image flashed painlessly in front of her eyes.  "We have to go save a girl from being slaughtered by a demon cult."  Spike looked at her in surprise.  When the idea settled with him he started towards the door.

"Right – a demon cult… how original," he said.

"We have three hours, Spike.  Tell Gunn it was a call from surveillance.  He'll let everyone know," Cordelia directed, not wanting the blond to be subjected to questions he couldn't answer.  Spike nodded and left the room.  Cordelia sighed.  She looked around the small laboratory.  Things were so different from a year ago.  A year ago, she was almost happy.  She had been just settling in with her feelings for Angel – and his for her.  She had a family she loved dearly and couldn't live without.  Conner had been returned to them and the door had been opened for Wesley to come home.  Things were finally starting to go right.  But then… everything went wrong.  She'd stupidly gone up to a higher plane, expecting everything to be all right.  Instead, everything had gone to hell.  Her body had come back as an evil entity and wreaked havoc on everyone and everything she loved.  Angel had revisited the pits of despair, almost killing his own son in the process.  And now, they were all paying for the mistakes she, _Cordelia_, had made.  None of this would have happened if she'd know the right answers to a test placed in front of her.  This was a hell of her own making.  And now she needed to make it right again.

"Care to share?" Spike's voice broke her into her thoughts.  Cordelia turned to him.

"Do they know?" she asked.  He nodded.  "Good."

"Mind telling me what put that look on your face?" he asked, genuinely concerned for the only person that could relate to his predicament.

"What look?" she asked.  Spike smiled – a genuine smile, not his usual smirk.

"The look that says someone just killed your puppy… that, or your world has ended.  Take your pick."  Cordelia gave a half smile to the man.

"Those are both horrifically morbid," she commented.

"Which only leads me to think that your thoughts were as well, luv," Spike retorted.

"I don't want to talk, Spike," she said.  Spike pretended not to hear.

"So, what's going to happen to you when this little 'save the world' party is over?" he asked casually.  Deciding to be a bit more forthcoming than usual, Cordelia sighed.

"The Powers may let me come back," she answered.

"Let you come back?" Spike asked, needing more explanation.  Cordelia sighed again.

"Yes.  Right now, they are barring me from my body.  I am supposed to use this opportunity to help save the world," she said.

"Why are they barring you from your body?" Spike asked.

"As punishment…" was the reply.

"For what?" There was no answer.  He tried again.  "For what?"  Again, silence.

"So…" Cordelia started as she stood up.  "How was it, saving the world and all?"  Spike frowned.

"What?"

"You know, sacrificing yourself for the good of the world… and the woman you love," Cordelia said, purposefully bringing up the B-word subject to divert from the previous conversation.  It worked.

"I don't…" he started, but Cordelia held up her hand.

"Please, spare me the trip to Egypt, okay?  I lived in my own world of denial for months to know that I've had enough of it," she said.  Spike frowned in confusion.  She hadn't been back to Sunnydale or been around all that much to know anything.

"How did you…?"

"Oh God… I wasn't up on a higher plane to _not_ see anything.  And the stuff that I didn't watch myself, I was shown… all in it's practically pornographic glory," she said with a disgusted grimace.  Spike had the grace to look a little embarrassed.  Before he could say anything, an image flashed in front of Cordelia's eyes.  _A blinding light, demons, Spike and the LA gang._  As her eyes focused on Spike again, she noticed him rubbing his temples.

"I guess that means we're needed, huh?" he asked.  Cordelia looked at him warily.

"You saw that too?" she asked.  Spike nodded.

"Couldn't bloody not, even if I tried," he said.  "Let's get going."  As he walked out the door, Cordelia looked up and smirked before following him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The fight had just started when Spike and Cordelia had arrived at the designated location.  Cordelia's face schrunched up in disgust as she saw over a dozen and a half of slimy brown demons circling her friends.  Even with Angel's abilities, Gunn's skill with an axe and Wesley's improved skills, the group was outnumbered.  Lorne and Fred were the obvious weak links in the fighting force, but they were there mainly to get the helpless soul to safety.  Cordelia and Spike, not being of the solid type, watched in horror as the demons used the divide and conquer battle tactic.  Each member of Angel Investigations were surrounded by at least two demons.  Angel dispatched his attackers understandably quicker than the rest and moved to help Lorne and Fred reduce their numbers one at a time.  Gunn and Wes had held their own for a while, but soon had more problems.  Cordelia knew that they needed help.

"Gunn, over here!" Wesley cried to his friend, three demons charging at him.  The black man rushed to his friend.  The two men stood back to back as they protected each other from the rushing attack.  Spike could only stand and watch as the gang was being slowly overpowered.  He looked behind him to see Cordelia glaring at the ceiling and shaking her hands.  It would have been funny to stand there and watch her do her little dance, but Spike knew there was more here than what he was seeing.  He made his way towards her, trying not to startle her.

"… come on, come on, come on!  If you want me to save these bumbling idiots, then I'm going to need a hand here!  Work _with me for once, okay?" he heard the brunette growl to no one in particular.  Spike turned back to look at the struggling LA gang and wanted badly to be able to help.  A demon had Wes by the neck and was trying to rip the poor wanker's head off.  Gunn was on the floor, trying valiantly to slice and dice the demon above him.  Lorne, Fred and Angel were cornered in the back – a wall standing behind them and five demons approaching from the remaining three directions._

"Yo, Wes man, I think we could use a bit of a miracle about now.  Got any fancy words to get us out of this mess?" Gunn grunted out to the man next to him.  The Englishman broke free of the demon's grip and scrambled back to retrieve his fallen sword.  He then held it up in front of him to ward off his attacker.

"I'm afraid I don't, Charles.  All I can do at the moment is wish for a little divine intervention," he said.  The words were not a second past his lips when there was a sudden blinding white light, sending everyone stumbling.  As the light faded, everyone looked around, including Spike.  They were alone.  Demons gone.  As everyone looked dumbfounded at each other, Spike turned back to look at Cordelia.  She wore a look of surprise, as well as pride, on her face with her hands stretched out in front of her.

"Oh my God," Spike heard Fred say.  When he looked back to the other brunette, he saw the tears fill her eyes.

"I wish for a complete Aretha Franklin CD collection!" Lorne cried as he fell to his knees, clasped his hands together and beseeched the ceiling.

"I think it would be best if we left now, while we still can," Wesley said cautiously, looking around the room while he rubbed his neck.  He walked over to where the shocked victim still sat, staring at nothing.  Gunn, Lorne and Fred all nodded as Wesley helped the shaken woman to her feet.  Angel was studiously silent as he looked around the room as well.

"I agree with Wesley.  Let's get out of here," he said as he led the rest of the group towards the exit.  Spike watched as they all walked past him.  As he did, he saw a single tear fall from the corner of Fred's eyes.  It would have taken more than vampiric hearing to catch what she said, but Spike heard it anyways.

"Thank you, Cordelia," she said reverently, her eyes cast heavenward.  Spike turned and saw a look of love and gratefulness in Cordelia's eyes, a soft smile on her face, belying the tears that ran down her face.

"You're welcome, Fred," she said softly.  All of a sudden, the scientist spun around, her eyes searching the now empty warehouse.

"Cordelia?" she asked.  The woman in question's eyes widened suddenly, a hand immediately going to her mouth.  She shook her head vigorously as she watched Fred search hopefully.  Then, disappointment set in after she couldn't find a thing.  The room was empty, then, with just Spike and Cordelia occupying the area.

"What the hell was that, luv?" Spike asked.  Cordelia looked at him innocently.

"What the hell was what?" she asked.  Spike scoffed.

"Don't play stupid with me, chit," he said.  "What was with the light thing and the talking to Fred?"

"A fluke," was the answer given to him.

"That was a bloody fluke?  I don't think so," he said, waving an arm around to gesture to the now-empty room.

"What do you want me to say, Spike?" Cordelia questioned, hands on her hips.  Spike watched her thoughtfully for a second.

"This isn't about them not letting you go back, is it?" he asked gently, his features softening.  Cordelia laughed softly.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," she said.  Spike shook his head.

"This is about you _wanting_ to go back.  The Powers aren't barring you from your body.  It isn't a question of punishment or atonement.  The Powers are giving you the choice, aren't they?" he asked.  Cordelia spun away from him.

"You have no idea about what you are talking about," she hissed.

"Oh-ho yes.  Yes it seems like I do.  I've hit a nerve, princess.  I'm right," Spike said with a grin.  Cordelia glared at him.

"It's none of your damn business, I told you that before," she said.  Spike held up his hands in surrender.

"Fine… you don't have to tell me a bloody thing.  Except what my part in this mess is.  You've arranged something to get me out of that law firm and I want to know what and why," he said.  Cordelia looked at him.

"At least you figured that much out," she said.  Spike scoffed.

"It wasn't hard to figure out considering I was able to able to walk out of the bloody building to go on this field trip," he said.  "Now, tell me what I'm doing here, luv – or I'm out."  Cordelia bit her lip in hesitation.  What could she get away with telling him so that he wouldn't walk away?  The world couldn't afford him walking away.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_** Author's note:  Intrigued yet?  I hope you are enjoying it.  Please review either way.  Reviews inspire me and make me want to write more… if no one tells me they like it then it takes me a while to find the drive to sit down and write as quickly as I have been.  I have other FF.net pieces going at the same time… I devote more of my time to the one with the most reviews… hint, hint…  Anyways, I hope you liked it!  Thanks for reading… **_


	4. Part IV

_** Author's note:  Thanks again to my wonderful reviewers!!  **Lumberjak, Rogue Fan, Harm Marie **- I'm glad you stopped by to let me know what you thought.  I hope you keep on reading!  **Bitchy Little Pixie** – glad to see you're as anxious to read as I am to write!  I love the Spike/Cordelia interaction as well.  It's a lot of fun to imagine and then write.  It's taken the front seat since Spike is the only one that Cordelia can talk to – for the moment…  **KellyC** – I'm glad you liked that line… I liked it too!  I felt it was a good time for a little interjected Lorne humor…  **Kim** – Wow!  Cult?  Statue?  Cool!  The many-stories-high statue might actually work to scare people away, so depending on your purpose for it, you may want to think that over! : )  But I am honored to have you say that.  I appreciate your support so much!  So, the next part is here.  I really hope that everyone enjoys it!! **_

Part IV

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Spike…" Cordelia started.  "I don't know what I can tell you…"  Spike crossed his arms.__

"All I want to know is what my deal is, luv.  You say I'm involved… and more than a supporting role type.  I want to know what it is," he said.

"Spike, we've gone around this circle a few times already.  There isn't much I can say," she explained.  Spike shook his head.

"Not good enough, luv," he said as he turned to leave.

"What's it to you anyways, Spike?  You're not going anywhere," Cordelia pointed out.  Spike sighed before he turned back to look at her.

"You have me there, but that doesn't mean I'm willing to sacrifice myself again," he said.  Cordelia's heart ached at his bitterness.

"Do you regret your decision?" she asked, a hidden motive in the seemingly innocent question.

"Do I regret that I did it?  No.  Not really.  Do I regret _why I did it?" he paused for a second as he really thought over his answer.  "I don't know."  Cordelia nodded, but didn't press for more.  He'd answered her honestly, and she appreciated that.  It only proved the choice wise.  After a quick internal debate, she decided to tell him what he wanted to know._

"Spike…" she started.  Now, how could one put this?  "I was brought back to give you a gift."  Spike looked confused.

"Well, you'd better tell me what it is, cuz it ain't my birthday, luv -" he paused to think about it for a second.  "- or at least I don't _think_ it is…"  Cordelia shook her head, frustration evident in the way she stood.

"Spike, could you just stop your incessant smart ass comments for a moment?  I'm supposed to inform you that I'm here to bestow the damn visions to you, okay?," she asked bluntly.  Spike chuckled – more like almost giggled.

" 'Incessant'.  'Bestow'.  You've been studying the word of the day calendar again, haven't you luv?  What with all the high and mi -" he stopped short when her words finally processed.  He turned to her quickly, all traces of humor gone.  "What?!?!"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Wesley stood in front of the newly acquired book.  Gunn stood at his side, pliers in hand.  Wes himself held a crowbar.

"What next, English?" Gunn asked his friend.  Wesley looked over the book from every angle.  The two clasps that held the text together looked quite ancient.  There was no telling how complicated it was going to be to get it open.  

"I'm not exactly sure, Gunn.  This could prove to be quite difficult," Wes said as he placed the crowbar beneath one clasp.  Using all of his weight, he leaned against it, hoping to pry the metal grip open.  Gunn watched his friend's struggle for a second or two before leaning in to add his weight as well.  After a minute or two of fierce tugging, pulling, jumping and prying, the men gave up.  Sitting back from the book, Wesley pushed his glasses up on his nose.

"I don't think this thingy-me-bob is gonna open, Wes my man," Gunn said, sitting back as well.  Wesley frowned in concentration.

"There's got to be a way we're overlooking," he said.  Gunn shook his head.

"Maybe it ain't all that important," the black man hoped.  Wes shook his head.

"I somehow doubt that," he said.  Gunn let out a huff.

"Of course," he said sarcastically.

"Whatever is in there, it's of some relevance or another.  The way Spike was acting earlier, there has to be a purpose for it.  I just need some time to read up on it," Wes said.

"Speaking of Spike, has anyone seen him?" Fred's voice called out.  Wes and Gunn spun around to see the willowy woman descending the stairs, Lorne and Angel following behind her.  Lorne was holding an ice pack to his nose.

"I haven't seen him since he rushed out of my office hours ago," Wes said as Gunn shook his head.

"Do you think… do you think he might have gone…" Fred stumbled out, biting her lip in apprehension.

"Well, here's to hoping," Angel said, causing his four friends to look over at him.  He shrugged at them.

"What?" he asked in his typical, unconcerned way.  Fred ambled over to where the book sat.

"Why do you think he was so concerned about this?  It looks really old," Fred commented as she ran her fingers over the deceivingly delicate-looking metal.  Her fingers ran over a slight ridge in the intricate settings.  "Ooooh.  What's this?"  When she pushed on the spot, the metal clasps sprung open.  Wes and Gunn looked at each other for a split second before they stepped closer to inspect.

"That was almost too easy," Wes muttered.  Gunn nodded in agreement.

"You don't think that there's any of those… things… ya know?" Gunn asked, using his hands to illustrate his words.  Wesley looked over in question.  "You know… where you open something, everything looks fine, and then BAM… all of a sudden you're without a head?"  Wes smirked.

"A boobytrap?  Like in the movies?" he asked his counterpart.  Gunn looked a little sheepish, but nodded.

"Hey," he defended.  "We work in the world of the mystical… it could happen…"  Wesley chuckled before he lifted the cover page and let his eyes run quickly over the front-page writing.  After expelling a breath, he straightened up.

"Oh my…" he said before turning to encounter four pairs of expectant eyes.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"You're here to _what?" a now-pacing ghost said.  Cordelia watched him with a smile on her face._

"I'm here to give you a choice," she said.  Spike let out a snort.

"So this is that all-important 'decision' you told me about earlier," he stated.  The brunette shrugged.

"It's one of them," she said.  Spike stopped pacing to look at her.

"You'd better explain, luv.  And no going off on tangents.  I want it straight," he said.  Cordelia sighed.

"I know.  You deserve it," she said.  "Okay, the thing is, The Powers That Be sent me back to give you the visions.  That is why you were brought back.  You, a lower being, sacrificed yourself for the world.  You gave up immortality to save a world that most are willing to destroy.  Let's just say that it gave you a gold star from the Powers."

"Great… do I get a cookie, too?" Spike asked sarcastically, causing Cordelia to smile.

"No, no cookie.  But when you take the visions, there are certain benefits for you," she continued.  This got Spike's full attention.

"Benefits?  What?" he asked. 

"Well, for one, you won't be stuck here.  You'll be unbound from Wolfram & Hart.  And the biggie… no fear of Hell…"  Spike stepped closer to her, disbelief in his eyes.

"Excuse me?  Did you just say what I thought you said?"  Cordelia nodded.

"No Hell, Spike.  You won't have the fear of fire and brimstone," she said.  Spike was silent as he pondered her revelation.

"What if I don't want the visions?" he asked.  Cordelia looked startled for a second, but she recovered quickly.

"You have every right to refuse them, Spike.  They won't be forced on you.  But you are the perfect candidate for this.  You are not a human, or a demon.  Your status as non-corporeal gives you the ability to handle the visions in their purest form," Cordelia said.  Spike nodded.

"Okay, tell me what will happen if I don't take them…"

"Whether or not you take the visions, the prophecy will come to pass.  There will be an apocalyptic battle with you there or not.  But if you don't take the visions, you will… you'll pass on to where you are supposed to go."  Spike nodded.

"Hell," he said what Cordelia didn't.  Her lack of response confirmed it.  He sighed sadly.  "I guess it would be deserved."

"Spike, whatever you decide, it is your prerogative.  You were brought back to make the choice.  But if you take these visions, you will be able to help… save people that are marked for death…" she said.

"This is what you meant by all that destiny crap," he muttered.  Cordelia nodded.

"Spike, I know it's not an easy choice by any means.  The visions means responsibility, self-sacrifice and more problems than you will ever want to know about.  But considering the alternative, I think it's pretty much a no-brainer," Cordelia said.  Spike nodded.

"I know, luv." he said, warming up to the proposition.  "But what about you?"  Cordelia looked down at her hands.

"What about me?" she asked.

"Where is this going to leave you?  You had the visions… and now you're lying comatose in the Wolfram & Hart basement," Spike said.  Cordelia smiled.

"Hey, who said you were the only one that had to make decisions?" she scolded.

"So I was right before, about the you wanting to come back," he said.

"Yes and no," Cordelia evaded.

"Come on, luv.  Which is it?"

"Do I have to make a decision about coming back?  Yes.  But I'm not the only one involved in this equation.  The Powers have decisions to make as well," she said.  Spike looked a little confused.  "Spike… the Powers giving you my visions is part of my punishment."

"Punishment for what, Cordelia?" Spike asked with a frown.  "As far as I've heard, you've done nothing but sacrifice yourself over and over for these visions and the helpless souls of L.A."  Cordelia shook her head.

"Spike, I've said repeatedly that it is none of your business.  I told you what you needed to know, and then some.  It's time for you to leave it alone.  Now, we need to get back to the firm.  Knowing Wesley's curiosity, he's probably locked himself in a room with that book.  With his brains, we could possibly stop this before it gets too terrible," Cordelia changed the topic as she headed out of the warehouse.  Spike just shook his head as he followed her.  The woman answered some questions – for which he was grateful – but she just brought to mind thousands more.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

  "You know, English, I like it better when you say 'Eureka'," Gunn observed as he watched Wesley bend closer to the text.

"Me too," Lorne said as he shifted the cold pack over his tender nose.  Those demons had walloped him a good one.  And if Wesley's aura had anything to say about it, things were about to get a little bit worse.

"What is it, Wesley?" Angel asked.  Wesley ran his finger over the writing.

"Well… this isn't a language I know.  I'm familiar with most human and demon languages – but this one is new to me," he said.  Gunn groaned.

"That means I have to go into research mode, doesn't it?" he asked.  Wesley looked up with a small smile.

"Since you so nicely volunteered…" he said, causing the black man to glare at him.  Gunn was about to turn to go find a computer to make himself comfortable at, but Fred held his arm.

"I'll do it, Charles.  I'm familiar with the Wolfram & Hart language database.  I'll see if I can come up with something," she offered.  Gunn smiled at her in appreciation.  He caught Wes' look as he turned back to the group.

"What?  She knows I do better with the chop and drop," he explained with a shrug.  Fred's clearing of her throat made the men turn back to her.

"May I ask what happened to the computer in here?" she asked.  Everyone looked at each other in question, except Angel, who looked almost ashamed.

"Ummm…. oops?" he supplied.  Wes rolled his eyes.

"What did you do to it this time?" Wes asked, knowing full well the extend of Angel's computer illiteracy.  "Didn't Cor… er… Haven't you learned a thing about it over the years?"  A slip of the tongue almost brought out a name everyone knew that could not be said.  It brought too much pain for everyone.  Silence fell as each tried to push the memories away.

"The computer got… ummm… kicked…" Angel explained.  Gunn frowned.

"What, did it kick you?" he asked.  Angel rolled his eyes.

"No… I had a little run-in… I took my anger out on it…" he said.  Lorne shook his head sadly.

"Poor defenseless computer.  Never saw it coming," he lamented.  Wesley smirked at the observation.

"Run-in?  The only person that seems to make you go all homicidal on inanimate objects is a certain spook…" Gunn said.

"Got that bloody right, mate.  I've always had an effect over Granddad there," Spike's voice spoke out.  Everyone looked around but could not see him.

"Spike?  Where are you?" Fred asked. her eyes searching.

"Behind you, luv," he said.  When Fred turned, she let out a little shriek when he suddenly appeared.

"Neat trick, isn't it?" he grinned at her before making his way down to where everyone else was.

"Have you been here this whole time?" Angel asked, eyes narrowing in suspicion.

"Of course not!  You all are a boring lot, why would I want to eavesdrop on all of you?" he said with another grin.

"Then where have you been?" Fred asked.  Spike looked up to her.

"Around and about…" he said, his eyes on Cordelia as she entered the room.

"Holy kickin' kyerumption, Batman!" Lorne suddenly cried, his eyes focused on where Cordelia was located.  Everyone looked at him suddenly.  "In other words, holy shit!"

"What Lorne?" Angel asked, his eyes finding nothing where Lorne seemed to be focused.  Spike began to get a little uncomfortable.

"There's something here!" the green demon exclaimed.  Cordelia's eyes went wide at his yell.  "I don't know what, but it's a mixture of white and blue.  It's like it's a soul or something.  I can almost read it, but it's really fuzzy…"  Spike looked to Cordelia and watched her concentrate, a frown coming over his face.  The green demon stood up and approached what he was seeing, trying to get a reading off of it.  As he reached out to try and touch it, his shoulders slumped.

"What is it?" Gunn asked, watching Lorne closely.

"I lost it," Lorne said.  "It went black.  It's not here anymore."  Spike's frown deepened as he watched Cordelia let out a breath.

"Well, Krevlornswath of the Deathwok clan… you were seconds away from causing some holy Hell…" she muttered.  She looked up to see Spike watching her.  

"I'm going to leave, Spike.  I can't have Lorne spilling the beans.  It's not time yet.  Plus, I have some things to take care of," she said.  And before Spike could say anything, she was gone.  Spike turned his attention back to the group to find Wesley engrossed in studying the book and Lorne, Angel and Gunn deep in discussion.  Taking the opportunity, Spike stepped up to Wesley.

"Watcher, I need to talk to you… and bring the book," he said before Wes could say anything.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Angel watched as Wesley followed Spike out of the room.  Things were going on, and they were beyond his comprehension.  All Angel knew was that Spike was in on it… and from the looks of it, Wesley soon was going to be as well.  It was frustrating that with all that had happened in the past year, everyone was still keeping secrets – especially Wesley.  He knew, firsthand, the price to be paid.  He sighed loudly, causing Lorne and Gunn to look at him.

"Looks like you could use a walk, crumb cake," Lorne said.  Angel shook his head.

"I'm fine, Lorne," he assured.  This time Lorne shook his head.

"No, no, no.  It _looks…" Lorne stated, emphasizing his point by circling a finger around Angel, indicating his aura. "… like you could use a walk."  Angel closed his eyes and took a calming breath._

"Fine," he said.  Lorne nodded happily.

"Good.  While you take a breather, Mr. Clean and I will go help Fredilicious," he said, taking Gunn's arm and leading him out.  Angel shook his head.  He knew he wasn't easy to be around these days.  And he knew very well that Lorne was on 'Beige Watch'… constantly watching to make sure Angel didn't slip.  It was understandable considering his history.  So… Angel took a walk.  As he walked, he thought.  Everyone knew that losing Connor and Cordy at the same time was driving him insane.  It was no secret.  But they didn't understand _why_.  They had loved Connor and Cordy, but not in the same way.  Hell, they didn't even know Connor was gone – wiped clean from their memories.  It took a deal with the devil to make the world a better place for everyone… everyone except Angel.  He was the one stuck with the memories.  At least his son was happy.  Living in a world free of the demons that had haunted him.  At least someone was free of them…

Cordelia walked silently next to the vampire.  She didn't know what he was thinking, but she could take a 50-50 stab at it.  Especially with the direction they were heading.  He was stuck in his guilt-ridden brood mode.  Surprise, surprise.  

"It's really no surprise that Lorne's worried, you know?  Look at you… pretty soon, that scowl is going to be permanent.  And Lorne's not the only one that's worried.  There are rumblings with the Powers.  They don't know what to do with you.  But then, they're hoping I can fix some things.  Except they don't realize some things have changed, do they?" Cordelia said to an unhearing vampire.  Her frown mirrored his as they both turned a corner.

"God only knows what's going to happen when everything starts.  We're all going to have important choices in the future.  Spike, me, you… I can't help you just as I can't help Spike.  I can't even help myself.  And all of this is my doing.  I set this in motion.  You have no idea how sorry I am, Angel.  My mistakes have cost you Connor, cost you the mission, your shanshu.  I love you, and this is what I've done to you," she choked out, tears blurring her vision.  She blinked them away and focused on the hallway ahead of them.  Cordelia recognized it and felt an ache in her heart.  She stopped and let him walk ahead of her.  It was the medical wing.  Angel was going to see her.   

"Oh Angel…" she said softly as she watched him go through her door.  She was about to go join him in watching over her comatose form when all of a sudden he burst through the door and ran past her.  There was panic written all over his face.  Frowning, Cordelia ran into the vacated room.  A gasp emerged from her as she covered her mouth.  The bed was empty.  Her body was gone.

"Oh God, no…" she rasped.  Tears now ran unabashedly down her cheeks.  "… no."  There was only one thought running through her head as she sat herself down on the floor.  She raised her face and beseeched the only people that could help her.

If you've let something take my body again, I will make my decision here and now and screw your plans into the ground!  Don't do this to them again!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

**Author's note: So, this is where my mind has decided to take me.  What do you think?  I've got lots more planned with a few quests popping in here and there…  Stay tuned! **


	5. Part V

_Author's appreciation corner:_

**_Pixy_**_ – Spike IS cute!  Anyway… I'm glad you think that Spike having the visions isn't stupid.  I was worried about how that would go over with some people.  As for Cordy's body… you'll just have to wait and see!  And thanks for being such a wonderful repeat reviewer.  It's nice to know I have a regular… ("Cheers" theme music plays)  :)_

**_Imzadi_**_ – Hmmmm… Lindsey with a love interest… Interesting.  I may have to play around with that for a while.  As for Kate… I'll have to apologize for not being her biggest fan.  She may show up, but I really won't miss her if she doesn't.  Sorry._

**_Tvfan_**_ – THANK YOU!_

**_Kimmers_**_ – Where's Cordy's body?  I'd like to know too!!  :P_

**_Lexie_******_– I'm sorry I confused you!  It breaks my heart when that happens and I apologize profusely!  The timeline I'm on is post-season 4… Season 5 is my own timeline with a few of the tidbits from the shows I've seen thrown in for fun.  So, unfortunately, those season 4 episodes did occur in my story.  I guess you can call it my way of trying to explain everything that happened away.  I totally agree that the Connor/Cordy fling was unwarranted.  They certainly could have explained Charisma's pregnancy in a less stomach turning way.  And Groo being the father would have been a soap opera-like twist.  Would have made for some great drama and vampire brooding… :)_

Part V

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"What the hell happened, Wesley?  Why wasn't I alerted immediately!?" Angel yelled as he paced in front of the seated Englishman.  Wesley rubbed his temples, the beginnings of a headache starting to make their presence known.

"Angel, I don't know.  It's a useless waste of time for you to continue to ask me these questions.  I was not alerted either.  I suggest you go pick apart the surveillance team.  We've had guards posted on her wing since the moment we got here," the ex-watcher pointed out tiredly.  He had just gotten through a futile conversation with Spike and now he was having yet another pointless conversation with Angel.  At least the conversation with Spike gave him something to really think about.  It was an interesting theory that the Powers' visions could be transferred to Spike.  The fact that Spike had even mentioned it had Wesley's mind turning down different alleys.  

"Wes?  Are you even listening to me?" Angel's voice broke into Wes' train of thought.

"Oh… yes.  I'm listening," he said. 

"Good… then we'll get the teams going in a ten block radius…" Angel said, pacing.  Wes frowned as he thought over Angel's words.

"Teams?  Ten blocks?" he asked.  Then it hit him.  Cordelia.  "Angel, we are all concerned about the whereabouts of Cordelia, but we can't…" Wesley trailed off as Angel turned to look at him.  The panic on the vampire's face was more emotion anyone in the office had seen on him in a long time.

"Wesley.  We can't _not_ look for her!" he said, leaning on Wes' desk.  Wesley nodded.

"I know, Angel, but we have to think clearly in this.  We need to reason through why anyone would take her," Wes said as he tried to put some pieces of the puzzle together.  A thought came to him that caused him to panic.

"Angel – where is Spike?" he asked quickly, standing up and leaning forward on his desk.  Angel shrugged his shoulders.

"Does it look like I care where he is?" he asked.  Wesley shook his head as he came out from behind his desk.

"Angel, it is imperative that we find him.  He may have some answers that can help us find Cordy.  He came to me earlier asking about the visions," he said emphatically.  Angel processed this thought as quickly as he could and came to the same conclusion that Wesley had just moments before.

"Let's find him," Angel said before he rushed out the door.  Wesley followed at a slightly slower pace.  As he followed Angel, he met Gunn in the hallway.

"Whoa!  Where's the fire?" he asked, trying to keep pace with Wesley.

"We need to find Spike, Gunn.  He may have pertinent information concerning Cordelia," the Englishman related.  Gunn's eyes went wide.

"Time to save Barbie?" he asked.  He clapped his hands together once as he kept pace.  "About damn time!"

***************************************

The entire gang was gathered in Angel's office, each trying to locate their ghostly companion in their own way.  All action came to a stop when a confused looking Spike appeared in the doorway.

"What's the bloody problem, mates?" he asked.  Wesley rushed forward and stopped a few feet from him.  

"Cordelia… she's missing," he said quickly.  Spike looked out of the corner of his eye to where a worried looking Cordelia was standing.

"I know," the ghost replied.

"Well, then you realize that I'm going to have some questions for you, concerning our earlier conversation," Wes stated.  Spike rolled his eyes before entering the room completely.

"Fire away, Watcher," he said as he found the nearest chair.  Wes cleared his throat and then nodded.

"Okay… umm… you had questions concerning the Powers transferring the visions to you.  Have you actually had a vision?" Wes asked, waving a hand at the collective gasp in the room.  Spike looked around the room at the waiting faces.  When he looked at Cordelia, she nodded her head.

"Actually… I have," he said.  Wesley nodded as he pushed his glasses up on his nose a little further.

"Was it the demon cult?"  Spike nodded.  Gunn frowned.

"You told me it was a surveillance report!" he said.  Spike nodded.

"I know, tough boy.  I just didn't want all the bloody questions when I didn't know any answers," Spike explained himself.

"And do you have any answers now?" Wes asked.  Spike shot up from the chair.

"Bloody hell, no!" he yelled.  "That's why I came to you, _Wesley_!"  

"Calm down, Spike!" Cordelia admonished.  At her words, Lorne's eyes widened, which the brunette noticed and calmed herself quickly.  Instead of calming Lorne, it only made his eyes go wider.

"Ummm, excuse me.  I think I need a drink.  You can handle all of this hubbub without me," he said quickly before exiting the room.  Cordelia looked panicked.  The green man was on to her.  

"Spike, I need to… well… follow him," Cordelia said as she rushed after the demon.  Spike didn't even acknowledge her as she left, he was too busy pacing.

"What _can_ you tell us, Spike," Angel urged his grandchilde on.  Spike sighed.

"All I know is that if I get the visions, I'm going to help save the bloody world - again.  If I don't take them, I'm going to Hell.  I suppose I should be asking you where all the hot spots are, Peaches.  You vacationed there… did you bring back any brochures?" he asked sarcastically.  

"Spike…" Angel said, trying to be patient.  "… if you take the visions… did the Powers say anything about what would happen to Cordelia?"  Spike looked at Angel.  It was the one thing that he couldn't get straight from Cordy.  _Damn chit!  Left me to field these questions all by my lonesome._

"No, the Powers haven't told me anything," Spike said.  At least it was the truth.

"Do you think that the reason they are transferring them is so that Cordy will die?" Fred asked, looking around the room for denials – her gaze finally resting on Spike.  The blond man didn't know how to answer that, because he didn't _know_ the answer.

"I don't know, luv," Spike answered honestly again.  The disappointment on all of their faces made Spike _want_ to know the answers.  _Bloody hell!_

***************************************

Cordelia rushed after her friend as he ran towards the nearest wet bar.  He poured himself a quick shot of tequila to take the edge off… then proceeded to make himself a nice sea breeze, at a slightly slower pace and with more concentration.  As he prepared to take a drink, he looked to where Cordelia was standing.  His eyes widened only slightly before he closed his eyes, turned away and took a calming drink.

"I'm going crazy… that's the only explanation for all of this," he muttered to himself as he poured more alcohol into his drink.

"Lorne," Cordelia said.  The demon jumped with a shriek, his glass shattering on the floor.

"Who the hell are you?" the demon asked, looking around the room.

"Lorne… it's me," Cordelia said, letting her concentration go.  The demon's eyes widened in surprise as he caught a slight glimpse of her form through her shining soul.

"Princess?" he asked.  Tears formed in the corner of her eyes when Cordelia saw the happiness come over her friend's face.

"Yeah, Lorne, it's me," she said, wanting more than anything to hug.

"Holy Powers, sugarmuffin.  The big guy is going to be so happy to hear your voice!  We all thought you were gone for good!" Lorne said, clapping his hands in excitement.

"No, Lorne!  You can't tell anyone!  Not yet, okay?" Cordelia begged.  Lorne looked at her in confusion.

"What not Cordelicious?" he asked.  Cordelia sighed as she motioned to a bar stool.

"You'd better sit, Lorne… it's going to be a long explanation," she said heavily.  Lorne, now completely interested, sat without arguing.

"Oh, Princess, do tell…" he said as he reached for another glass and filled it.

***************************************

Everyone, minus Lorne, still sat in Angel's office trying to brain their way through the current problem.  Wesley was buried up to his neck in textbooks strewn across the floor.  Fred was parked at the computer, Gunn standing studiously behind her.  Angel was broodingly staring at a text he was supposed to be reading, and Spike was pacing in front of him.  No one was getting anywhere when Lorne finally joined them.

"You can all put your things down and relax.  You don't need to worry about anything," he said as he sat down with happy flourish.  Wesley looked up from his current reading.

"What do you mean?" he asked.  Lorne smirked.

"I have it on high authority that the Princess is just fine.  No harm done to her," he said.  Angel stood up suddenly.

"What are you talking about?  What high authority?" he asked menacingly.  There was a brief look of trepidation in the demon's eyes at Angel's growl, but it was quickly replaced with one of confidence.

"You can sit back and relax – well, as much as you can in an evil law firm.  Anyways, it has been revealed to me that nothing is amiss.  Blondie Bear here can take the visions and no one will die in exchange," Lorne explained.  Wesley stood up.

"Does this mean you know where Cordelia's body was taken?" he asked.

"Well," Lorne said, looking regretful.  "No.  I don't."  He held his hands up in defense as he heard Angel let out another growl.

"Then what the hell _do_ you know then?" the vampire demanded.  Lorne stood up and straightened his suit, casting a look to where Spike was standing – Cordelia next to him.

"All I know, kiddies, is that this doesn't involve hell dimensions, higher planes or heaven and hell.  At least not yet," Lorne said.  "Right now, only the human psyche is concerned.  That, and the coming apocalypse."  There was silence from the group as they processed the news.

"At least we there isn't going to be any swirly hole jumping," Wesley said finally, Fred and Lorne nodding in vehement agreement.  Gunn shrugged his shoulders.

"I thought that was kinda fun," he commented, causing his three friends to look at him strangely.  "What?  It was!"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_** **A/N & apology** – Well, well, well, it's time for a semi-short rant.  I finally stepped on someone's toes and paid the review price for it.  Not that I mind, of course – it keeps me humble, right?  It just saddens me that someone has to come pick apart my work (which they apparently didn't read all of) and tell me it's stupid because they don't like my OPINION on something.  Again, I will apologize for whatever it is people are offended by.  As I stated before, I am entitled to my opinion… just like everyone else is.  I may not like someone else's opinion, but I can accept it as something that I don't have the right to begrudge them or to try and change.  This is a fiction, folks.  If you don't like it, don't read it!  I can't say that enough, just like I can't force you to read it (nor do I want to).  I respect people who have dissenting opinions to mine and politely acknowledge the differences.  If anyone cares to discuss my reasoning for doing, saying, or writing what I do, e-mail me.  It's available and I'd be glad to discuss things in private so that valuable writing space and reading time isn't wasted at times like these.  Anonymous hate mail does not do a bit of good in me taking you very seriously.  I'm sorry **The Truth, that your sensibilities were poked and prodded and that you were displeased with my OPINION.  Safe to say we agree to completely disagree.  We have an accord in that.  For all of the wonderful readers that don't agree with me yet have grudgingly read to this point, I say a hearty thank you for having a civil, respectful bone in your body and that CONSTRUCTIVE criticism is completely welcome.  I'm off my soapbox now, and I really want to thank everyone that reads it, enjoys it, and reviews.  It makes a snotty review seem insignificant.  THANK YOU! ****_


	6. Part VI

_** Author's appreciation corner: _

**_Lexie_**_ – Thank you!  :)  You'll just have to read and see!_

**_Pixy_**_ – Harmony?!?!__  Nooooooooooooo!  Sorry – she drives me just a little insane…  Except Lornytoons?  Hehehehe… that's good.  Thank you – and yes, Spike will end up with the visions if that isn't obvious.  He'll take them grudgingly for a couple of reasons that I can't go into… for obvious reasons… :P  I figured there needed to be a replacement connection and it doesn't seem like  Mr. Whedon has gone into that at all.  Angel still needs his redemption – right?  Right.  And no problem with the help.  Glad to!  I can't wait to read your stuff & review it!  Hurry up and post! (Cracks whip…)  :)_

**_Alex_**_ – Thank you for saying something that I so **badly** wanted to say.__  I've read that same stuff about CC and her baby.  I just didn't want it coming out as a petty comeback… same with the season 4 crap.  I knew where it was headed after watching a few and I wanted to get out before I got caught staring at the disaster, ya know?  Don't get me wrong – I love "Angel" and always will – I own the first 2 seasons on DVD and I'm anxiously awaiting the 3rd.  But forgive me if my interest has waned in the poor storylines  - that's why I'm writing this fanfiction.  Thank you so much for your support & defense.  I can't tell you how much I appreciate it!_

**_Giggleboxsam_**_ – I think I **did** cry when she left… And thanks!  I'm glad you're enjoying it!_

**_Michella_**_ – I've been a fan since day one as well… and a shipper the moment Cordelia muttered the words "Hello salty goodness…"  I'm glad you think the characters feel real and the plot lines are believable.  I wouldn't be doing my job as a writer if either one of those weren't there.  And thank you… your review lightened my heart and cheered me up immensely! :)_

**_There are more review thanks  at the end.  This was beginning to run ridiculously long because I am perpetually longwinded when it comes to writing anything… :P_**

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Okay, so no swirly hole jumping… what can we do then?" Angel asked as he paced.  Lorne shook his head, not wanting to say the words but knowing he had to.

"Nothing," the demon said, causing everyone to look at him.

"Nothing?  What do you mean nothing?" Gunn asked, looking like he wanted to hit something.

"I'm sorry, sugarmuffin, but that's exactly what I mean.  Cordy's… well, _situation_… has nothing to do with what _you_ can do.  It's not in your hands," Lorne explained.

"You'd better try to explain that better," Angel growled, stepping closer to the green man.  Lorne held up his hands.

"There's no way I can explain it to you that's going to make it sound any better, Angelcakes.  Cordelia's destiny is not yours to figure out," he said.  Fred crossed her arms and shook her head.

"No.  I won't accept that.  We've beaten the odds before, we've done the impossible.  If all that's true, then there's a way we can figure this out too," she said, trying to sound optimistic.  Instead she came off as desperate.  Wesley looked at her sadly.

"I'm afraid that Lorne may be correct.  As much as we don't like it, we may have to accept that Cordelia is gone," he said.  This time Gunn shook his head.

"She may not be with us, but that doesn't mean she's gone.  She'll fight.  We need her, and she needs us.  She needs us to believe in her right now, not give up on her," he said with emotion that was so unlike him.  Cordelia's eyes welled up at the fight still left in her family.  They hadn't given up on her completely.

"She promised… she promised that she would be with me until I shanshued… Well, she isn't here, is she?  And now you're telling me that there is nothing I can do.  I can't accept that," Angel said, pacing again.  All eyes were on him as Lorne stood up next to the vampire.

"I'm sorry, you can not accept it all you want, but it isn't going to change anything.  But I've said that already.  And if you don't want to listen, I can't make you.  I told you what I needed to tell you.  So responsibility for whatever you do is _not_ on my shoulders," the green demon said as he waved to the room full of people and left.  The silence in the room as everyone looked at each other stupidly could have suffocated even an un-breathing vampire.  No one knew what to say…

"So what are you bloody wankers going to do about these bloody visions?"  Well, no one knew what to say except Spike.  Wesley slowly sat back down where he had been seated on the floor before.  He picked up a book and started thumbing through it.

"Does that mean you've decided to accept the visions?" the man asked, causing everyone to look at Spike expectantly.  Spike shrugged as he cast a quick look at a smiling Cordelia.

"Well, mates, it was either that or Hell.  And frankly, I'd rather stick around here in this God-forsaken place, fighting 'the good fight' than go there," he said, causing Cordelia to roll her eyes.  Gunn clapped his hands together and rubbed them.

"Good… we've already got a brooding 'oh woe is me' vampire, a fruity karaoke-singing demon, a missing human/demon/seer/evil entity, and three measly humans.  We needed a headache-inducing ghostly vampire to round out the gang," he said, sarcasm rich in his voice.  Spike rolled his eyes.

"Maybe Hell isn't such a bad place after all," the blond man said.  Cordelia held up her hands.

"Well, buddy boy… you said the words.  You are the sole owner of the freakin' visions.  You lucky bastard," Cordelia said, sarcasm in her voice as well.  Spike huffed slightly, careful not to draw attention to his side conversation.  This time Cordelia laughed.

"I wash my hands of you," she said, throwing her hands up and exiting the room, leaving five people wide-eyed as her parting words resonated throughout the room.

***************************************

Cordelia wandered around the law firm as only a soul-y entity could do.  Walking through walls, eavesdropping on conversations, being newly vision-free… it was all causing a certain giddiness that was actually starting to make her worry about her sanity.  With that thought, Cordelia continued on through countless walls until she reached her destination.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa… could you cap the headlights, _please?" Lorne exclaimed as he threw his hands up in front of his face to block out the arrived aura.  Cordelia crossed her arms in front of her and tapped her foot in impatience._

"Lorne, I need you to tell me what's going to happen," she said.  Lorne rolled his eyes as he turned away from her.

"Who do I look like, Madame Cleo?" he asked as he reached his minibar.

"Lorne!  You read auras!  And since that's all I am, I figured this would be a cakewalk for you.  I need to know what's going to happen to me now that the Powers have transferred the visions," she said hurriedly.  

"Cordycrumb… you told me you knew what was going to happen," he said, a concerned frown gracing his features.  Cordy looked to the ground.

"I do, sort of… but someone or something took my body again… that wasn't in the plan… so who knows what is really going to happen?" she said.  Lorne looked at her seriously.

"Princess, if you just search out the answers in that pretty little head of yours, the answers are all there.  You know what's going to happen," he said.  Cordelia looked at him sadly.

"Maybe I just want someone else to tell me," she said, causing Lorne to give her a pitying look as he approached her.  

"I know that what you've been through hasn't been easy.  And sugar, it ain't about to get any easier.  You've got a surly ghost seer that's going to need your help, plus you have an upcoming Armageddon in which your friends' lives are in danger, blasts from the not-so-past-like past, and your own life in you manicured hands.  I don't envy you… but in the end, the trip just might be worth it.  I…" he stopped as he strained his head to one side, causing Cordelia to look at him in concern.

"Lorne?  Are you okay?" she asked, wishing desperately she could touch him and help him to sit down.

"Allah, Powers, Buddah, Goddess, Thor, Christ… Elvis…" Lorne pleaded with clasped hands to the ceiling every deity he could come up with off the top of his head, "… give me strength…"  Cordelia frowned.

"What the hell are you talking abo…" her question was cut off when the door to Lorne's apartment burst open.

"Did you mean Cordy?" Angel asked, coming to a stop a few feet within the room and causing three scrambling companions to run unceremoniously into him.  Lorne took on a look of innocence.

"Ex-squeeze me?" he asked, putting a hand to his ear in mock incomprehension.  Angel rolled his eyes.

"You said you had it from higher authority… is the 'higher authority' Cordelia?" Angel expanded his earlier question.  Lorne shrugged.

"I have no idea what you are talking about…" the green demon said.  Gunn cracked his knuckles as he stepped forward towards him.

"I can make him talk… it's a simple procedure, really… remove head from shoulders and voila…" he said, causing Lorne to shriek and run behind the couch and Angel to catch Gunn with his arm.  Lorne peeked up from behind the piece of furniture, his red eyes just clearing the edge.

"Okay, okay, okay… no need to result to violence… Why would you think Princess is so-named 'higher authority'?" he asked cautiously, standing up slowly.  The four standing in front of him looked at each other and shifted a little uncomfortably.

"We heard her…" Fred squeaked out, peeking out from behind Wesley.  Lorne straightened with a slight frown as Cordelia let out a little shriek of her own.

"You heard her?" he asked, a deeper frown thrown in Cordelia's direction.

"Yeah… it was after you left… we were talking with Spike about the visions… Spike was being… well… he was being…" Fred stumbled.

"Oh stop skirting manners chit and cut to the chase… I was being my regular bloody old self," Spike announced his arrival.  Lorne nodded.

"Okay, I'm following so far," he said.

"They _think_ they heard her say she washes her hands of me…" Spike supplied.  "I, personally, just think they're nuts.  If I were you, Greeny, I'd get on the horn and order up some of those lovely white jackets they've got in storage around here…"  Wesley turned to the ghost with a frown.

"_Think_ we heard Cordelia?  If I recall correctly, you were in the room and just as surprised as the rest of us," he said, causing all of the other occupants to nod in agreement.  Lorne held up his hands.

"Hold it boys and girl… and vampire and ghost…" he said.  "There isn't much I know, trust me.  I told you pretty much everything…"

"Pretty much?" Angel growled.  The green demon shook his head.

"Need to know basis, amigo.  And at this point there ain't one of you that needs to know.  In fact, there seems to be information I'm missing as well," he said, glaring slightly at a shrugging Cordelia.  All of a sudden, there was a blindingly bright white flash of light that only Lorne and Spike could see.  When they looked around the room, amid curious and suspicious looks, they noticed they were missing their brunette entity.  Lorne and Spike looked at each other, eyes wide.

"Well… I can say that maybe the 'need to know' basis has become a 'might like to know' basis…" Spike said.  Lorne closed his eyes and muttered a long string of curses in another demon language.

***************************************

"Shit, shit and more shit," Cordelia cried as she uncovered her face.  She looked around carefully and noticed that there was nothing… just white.  She sighed as she gingerly took a step towards… well… nothing.

"At least it isn't Pylea, Quor'toth, or… San Diego," she said with a shudder.  

"Cordelia…" a voice said, causing the ghostly woman to turn in circles to search out the source of the voice.  Finding none, she frowned.

"I'm guessing that I am _actually_ over the rainbow," she said with a shake of her head.

"Cordelia…" the voice said again.  Her eyes closed in frustration.

"Okay, we've established that we've hijacked the right aura… now what's going on?" Cordelia asked.

"Your purpose has been served… it is time for the choice…" the voice said.  When Cordelia opened her eyes again, she almost shrieked at the sight of her own body walking towards her.

"Oh, God…"

***************************************

_** Okay, so that's the next part.  I know it's a little short, but I wanted to get this out there so that my brain can continue working on this plot.  I had to shake some of the cobwebs off.  Let me know how it is!!!_

_** Review thanks, continued…_

**_Maliek_**_ – I'm glad you are enjoying it.  Thank you and keep on reading!_

**_Blaire_**_ – I think TheTruth **did** screw him/herself when they didn't sign their review.  Honestly, how is anyone going to take that seriously?  It was rather rude and cowardly.  I thank you for your support.  As for the story – guidance counselor?  I never thought of it like that! :)  And Cordy?  Don't be wary!  Not a chance in hell she'll be written out or banished to the woodwork without a purpose (as far as I know at the moment – my muse has a way of running from me now and again) – she's just too vital!  She's the **heart**!_

**_Samson_**_ – I'm glad you like the idea… I'm fairly fond of it myself.  It fills in a lot of the blanks that have been left.  Don't worry, there's more to come… eventually!_

**_Yama-Neko_**_ – I love a good intrigue too!  So, keep on reading!!_

**_Kimmers_**_ – Glad you came back!  And I'm happy that you liked it… :)_

**_Amanda_**_ – Thanks for your review._

**_Staraice_**_ – Don't worry, you'll get your answers as to what Cordelia is being punished for.  And thanks for your review!  I appreciate it._

_And to anyone else that I didn't catch in the reviews… THANK YOU!  Keep on reading and reviewing…:P_


	7. Part VII

_** Author's appreciation corner: _

**_Imzadi_**_ … Thanks, and you may… :)_

**_Haley_**_ … I throw many thank you kisses in your direction… :P_

**_Athlantis_**_ … Well, I SOOOO did leave it like that! :P  You'll see what the choice is and what her 'punishment' is for coming up in the next few parts.  Thanks for such a lively review!_

**_The 2nd Evil_**_ … I'm happy that you are enjoying this!  As for Connor… eh… I'm not sure if I'm going to do much with him.  I liked him up until that hateful… er **fate**ful Rain of Fire shit… er **bit**…  Although, I did enjoy his' tortured son' bit in the season 4 finale…  As I said, we'll see if I want him to make an appearance. *Muse growls menacingly at me*  If I do, I must tame the beast within… *bad muse*   :)_

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Aura Cordy eyed the solid Cordy with a suspicious eye.  She looked the same as she had before she was taken.  For a second, Cordelia closed her eyes.  There were too many pronouns floating in her head.  It was a little confusing.

"Okay, so now that I've sufficiently been creeped out in this Twilight Zone-esque crap, could you fill me in on what exactly I'm supposed to be choosing?" Cordelia asked with a frown.

"You know the choice in which you must make," a voice behind her said.  Cordelia turned, only to shriek again when she saw a gold-skinned, Oracle looking being.  With a hand over her heart, Cordelia let out a breath.

"My God… what is it with people and the silent approach - let's scare the crap out of Cordy routine, huh?  Bells, people, bells… has anyone heard of them?" she said crankily.  The gold face remained impassive as it watched her. 

"Your choice," the being prompted.  Cordelia shook her head.

"I don't have one… I need some time to think…" she said.  The being nodded.

"Very well.  You will have a short moment to contemplate…" it said before disappearing, leaving Cordelia alone.

" 'You will have a short moment to contemplate'…" Cordelia whiningly mocked as she sat herself down where she had stood.  "God, what do I do?" she asked, putting her head in her hands.  The Powers were giving her three choices.  One… she could simply die.  Go on to wherever it is she was destined to go.  Two… she could become a higher power.  Three… go back.  Become human.  Each one had their drawbacks, Cordelia thought with a frown.  If she died, she wouldn't be able to help her family.  If she became a higher power, she would have no clue what she would be needed to do or if she'd be able to even see her family.  It was a little undefined.  But if she became human… well, she'd have her family.  Only she wouldn't have her visions… her purpose.  Cordelia sighed.  She was being selfish, and she knew it.  She should be ecstatic that she was even being given the choice.  Hadn't she learned her lesson already?  Being selfish is what got her into this mess in the first place.  Cordelia knew that having the best of each world wasn't an option.  And Cordelia wasn't stupid… she knew what kind of world she'd go back to if she so chose.  Knowing that her decision was pretty much a no-brainer, she could only ask herself one more question.  _Was it worth it?_  A voice broke through her thoughts.

"It is time for the choice…"  Cordelia stood, her choice made.  _Please don't let me be making a mistake…_

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The room had emptied out quickly, which Wesley was thankful for.  He'd watched both Spike and Lorne closely, but neither one of them had said anything after their strange behavior.  They'd both left, each yelling at each other about things that the rest of them had no knowledge of.  Angel, frustrated beyond comprehension, had stalked out after them.  Gunn and Fred, wary of what the vampire would do, had swiftly followed after him.  _What a strange night,_ Wesley thought to himself as he exited his demon friend's apartments and made his way towards his own.  After a walk down the hallway, he let himself into his dark apartment.  The stress of the past few months were starting to take their toll on him even though he tried his hardest to hide it.  His normally straight, stiff, English-proud shoulders were slouching tiredly more often than not these days.  He averaged about three or four hours of sleep a night… and not because of their unusual schedules.  Wes wasn't sure if it was a simple bout of insomnia or his weighted, guilty conscience that kept him staring at the ceiling at night.  The insomnia he could deal with… a guilty conscience… not so much.  With a sigh, he flipped the light switch allowing light to flood the apartment.  The apartment was a drastic opposite to what Wes actually preferred.  But then again, so was Wolfram & Hart.  He let out another sigh as he sat on the black leather couch in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows.  It had been fear, guilt, and desperation that had led the gang to accept their positions in the law firm.  To be completely honest with himself, Wes had no clue what _really_ led any of them there.  It was true that Cordelia – or what was left of her – was in a grave situation that none of them could begin to understand.  The resources of the firm would be able to assist her better than any one of them could.  But she wouldn't have wanted them there.  And every time Wes tried to delve into his own reasoning it always felt like there was something missing.  Like there was a large black spot in his mind…

"A penny for your thoughts…" a voice said suddenly.  Wesley turned to look at the door.  He sucked in a quick breath and his eyes widened before he rose to his feet.  All he could do was stand and stare.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Are you saying that all this time, she's been able to communicate with everyone, but instead has been hiding her presence?" Lorne asked a pacing ghost.  Spike's hand sat thoughtfully on his chin.

"I don't know what I'm saying, mate.  She hid her aura from _you_, and only when she was unable to control it were you able to see it.  She also said something back at the warehouse when you all were fighting those demons… Fred had heard her…  And now, everyone else as well…" he said.  Lorne's eyes widened.

"It was her, wasn't it?" he asked.  Spike looked over in confusion.

"What the bloody hell are you talking about?" he asked.  Lorne waved his hands around.

"With the flashy thing!  It was her!  She was there and was able to use her powers in order to help us!  I should have know…" the green demon said, smacking a hand to his forehead.  "By the Powers, I can be sooooo blind sometimes…"  Spike shook his head.

"I should have known something was up… she's been weird," the blond man said.  Lorne frowned.

"Weird, how?" he asked.

"I keep asking her what's going to happen to her and she avoids the question like the plague.  She says that she's being punished… but she won't say for what or how," Spike commented, a worried look coming over his face.  Lorne smiled.

"Has the tin man grown a heart?" he asked, purely astonished at the ghost's concern.  Spike glared over at him.

"She's kept me from Hell.  I figure I owe her one, mate.  If there's a way I can help, I'm going to bloody find it," he said.  Lorne shook his head.

"The princess may not want our help," he said.  Neither Lorne or Spike noticed the third presence in the room until it made itself known.

"Why wouldn't Cordelia want our help?" Angel's voice asked, causing Lorne to spin around to look at him.

"You know, Cordelia always said something about you humming a little tune… would it kill you to just try it once, big guy?" the demon asked.  Angel glared as he crossed his arms in front of him.

"I don't hum," he said.  Lorne rolled his eyes.

"But you can mutilate poor Mandy…" he commented, causing another glare from the vampire.

"I believe I asked you a question," Angel pointed out.  Spike just chuckled.

"A fat lot of help you've been Peaches… Frankly, I wouldn't ask for your help either if I were her," the ghost said.  Angel looked between the two.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" he asked.  Lorne looked at Angel sympathetically, knowing what Spike was digging at.

"Never mind that, Angel.  Cordy may not want our help because she may not need it," Lorne hedged a little.  "Her aura is troubled, Angel.  There are things she's going to need to work through.  And no pushing from us is going to make it go any quicker."  Angel didn't want to accept that he couldn't help his Cordy, but he resisted the urge to argue with his friend.  He knew that Lorne knew what was going on but nothing, save torture, was going to get the green demon to say anything.  Angel was about to verbally relent when a security guard came rushing through the office door.

"What?" Angel asked menacingly to the uninvited presence.

"Sir… security reports an intruder up in the apartment levels," he said.  Angel frowned.

"How did someone or something get all the way up there?" he growled.  The guard, frightened beyond speech at Angel's look, could only shrug slightly.

"I… I… I don't know sir.  But the sensors say it's human," he said before escaping through the door.  
 "Let's go," Angel said.  Lorne held up a finger to protest, but swiftly put it down.

"Coming," he said miserably as he followed the vampire out the door. 

"Angel!" Fred's voice called as he emerged from the office.  Lorne, Spike and Angel all turned to see Gunn and Fred running towards them.

"Yo, dog… we heard there was a breach in the apartments and we…" Gunn started, but stopped as his eyes widened.  Both he and Fred came to a complete stop, their gazes locked on something behind the other three.  Gunn's turned into one of caution while Fred's held uncertainty and confusion.  Angel turned to see what they were looking at and he stood up straight as he recognized the gait, the eyes and the smirk as their owner stalked closer.

"Well, well, well… Look who got promoted… I guess that means Hell has _finally_ frozen over," a voice said in a jovial timbre.  Angel's face was impassive.

"I didn't think we'd ever see you again," Angel said.  Lindsey McDonald put his hands in his pockets casually as he stepped within arms reach of the vampire.

"Well, what can I say?  I couldn't resist seeing the changing of the guard at Wolfram & Hart…" the ex-lawyer said.  A rushing sound of footsteps caused Angel to look up.  Wesley came running towards them, crossbow in hand.

"I heard that there was a breach down here…" Wesley panted before he focused on the new addition.  "… Lindsey…"  

"Hey, the gang's all here…" Lindsey said, his eyes falling on Fred. "… minus one and plus one, of course.  One brunette for another…"  Angel frowned, but turned back to Wesley.

"Is everything alright upstairs?" he asked.  "We heard there was a breach up there…"  Wesley frowned.

"The only alert I received was for down here…  Maybe they got things mixed up…" the Englishman said, his eyes darting over everyone only to find Lorne staring avidly back.  Angel nodded at Wesley's explanation and turned back to Lindsey.

"How's the hand-thing working out for you?" he asked conversationally.  Lindsey removed the hand in question from his pocket and lifted in front of him, wiggling the fingers.

"Oh, I think I've got the hang of things," he said before reaching the hand out to Lorne.  "Good to see you again, my friend…"  Lorne watched Lindsey closely as he gripped the other man's hand.  This one was shifty…

"And you as well.  You've graced us with your presence, may I be presumptuous enough to say you've graced us with your voice?" the demon asked, wiggling his eyebrow.  Lindsey laughed softly.

"We'll see.  Is that good enough?" he asked.  Lorne grinned.

"It'll have to be," he answered as Lindsey turned to Fred and shook her hand.

"And you are?" he asked charmingly.  She smiled.

"Winifred Burkle," she answered.  "Everyone calls me Fred…"  Lindsey thought for a second.

"Burkle… where have I heard… oh yes!  You're the physicist… the firm had been watching you for some time before your unfortunate… disappearance…" Lindsey said.  Gunn took Fred's arm and pushed her slightly behind him.

"Oh relax, I'm not here out of some sort of nefarious plot," Lindsey said.

"Then why don't you inform us of why you are here then," Wesley said.  Lindsey looked to the vampire.

"Actually, I need to discuss something with Angel…" he said.  Angel nodded and indicated for Lindsey to enter the recently vacated office.  The rest of the gang watched cluelessly as the door shut behind the two sometimes-enemies.

"Well, then… back to the language hunt…" Fred said.  Wesley looked over at her.

"How's that coming, by the way?" he asked.  Fred let out a frustrated breath.

"Not well at all.  I've tried everything and I can't find anything that even so much as _mentions_ the book… not that I know what the title is or anything… but not even a _description_," she said.  Lorne didn't say anything but continued to watch Wesley, which didn't escape the other man's notice.  Gunn shrugged his shoulders.

"Don't worry girl… we'll get it.  We always do.  Since we're going to have our hands attached to either a computer or a book all night, what do you say to ordering a pizza?" he asked.  Fred's eyes lit up.

"That sounds good… Let's get a taco pizza," she said.  Gunn rolled his eyes.

"You've got to branch out, girl," he said with a shake of his head at Lorne, Spike, and Wes.  The two then turned and started chatting amiably as they went to continue their research.

"Well, all the excitement of the evening seems to be over with… I'm off to the little ghost's room," Spike said.  Lorne made to say something but Spike stopped his forthcoming mocking remark.  "Sod off, Greeny…" he said before he disappeared.  The demon then turned his red eyes to the ex-Watcher.  Wesley frowned, but squirmed at bit under the intense gaze.

"Could you possibly cease gawking at me like that?" he asked.  Lorne shook his head.

"No, no, no, no… secrets aren't good, sugarmuffin," he said.

"Secrets?  What secrets?" Wes asked.  Lorne pointed to himself.

"Look who you're talking to, okay?  Your aura is all murky… and that means you are hiding something…  I could say 'tell me', but I'm not going to.  You have your reasons, but I'm going to warn you.  Nothing good can come from it," Lorne warned.  _Didn't we learn our lesson the last time?_  Lorne frowned at his internal thought.  What would have made him say that?  What last time?  

"Kindly stop reading my aura, Lorne," Wes said, breaking into the demon's internal argument.  Lorne threw up his hands.

"Fine.  I'm so sick of auras anyways… one of these days, I'm going to gouge out my own eyes… see where you all will be then, huh… you will all come crying to me.  'Read my aura Lorne', 'Tell me what to do, Lorne', 'I need your help, Lorne'…" he said with a twist of his lips and a scolding shake a finger.  "You will all rue the day that Krevlornswath of the Deathwok clan packs up his aura reading bags and kicks it out of this metropolitan hell…"  With that, the demon spun on his heel and marched away in a huff.  Wes, fiddling with the crossbow he held in his hand, looked to the ground.  A conflicted look crossed his face before he, too, turned and made his way slowly down the hall.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_** Author's note:  So, that's this part… what did ya'll think?  This story has taken quite a twist from what I originally planned, but *laughs maniacally* I am enjoying the way the new story is going to go SO much better!!  I hope you will enjoy as much as I have coming up with it…  I promise, it will be intriguing.  So, tell me what you think of this part!!!!!   _


	8. Part VIII

_** Author's disclaimer:  Okay, so I haven't watched **any** of season 5 except the Reaper episode… and since that episode was mainly about Spike, I couldn't really get any information about what's going on.  Also… this is an **alternate** season 5, meaning that story lines will NOT be the same.  I did see the season 4 finale where everyone says "Who's Conner?" at the end.  I'm taking it from there… so everything after that is pure 'my way' except for a few tidbits (like Spike being a ghost) thrown in from whatever I learned from the single episode I saw…  I'm sorry to whomever that offends.  I just wanted to make that clear before this chapter…_

_** Author's gratitude:_

**_IMZADI_**_ … THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!!  Color me red, take my foot out of my mouth and give me a toothpick to pick the toenails out of my teeth… that is SO embarrassing! (For shame *slaps wrists*, I own the DVD's!!)  Thank God there's an encyclopedia out there, right?  I'm really glad you caught that, and I'm glad you reviewed so quickly… it gave me a chance to fix and post it the very same day.  I hope I didn't piss some people off… :)  I forgot that episode for some reason and I guess it shows that I need to go reacquaint myself with my DVD's, huh?  Oh well… all's well that ends well.  I hope you like the next part!_

**_Athlantis_**_ … Don't you worry sweetie… Cordy to the rescue!  You'll get your answers (or at least some of them) in the following part.  Lindsey's there because  I like him and I may have plans for him later on… we'll see.  So, stick with it, it'll get better…_

**_Angellover_**_ … I want Cordy back too!!  She'll be back soon, trust me… :)   As for the punishment – we'll see if you're right.  I love the interaction between Lorne, Spike and Cordy too.  The 3 of them have such outlandish personalities that I couldn't resist throwing them in the same ring… Let me know if you like the next part!_

**_Haley_**_ … I agree that it's a bitchy thing the Oracles did… but it's time for Cordelia to pay the piper (that sounds worse that it really is, though).  As for Darla… No.  I don't plan on her returning or Lindsey to be involved with her.  Keep on reading!_

**_Amanda_**_ … Yes Master… (*Bows & starts typing furiously* :P)  And thanks!_

**_Rachel_**_ … Thank you!  You'll just have to wait and see!  _

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Wesley sighed as he walked back into his apartment.  He wasn't able to discern whether Lindsey McDonald's presence was a good thing or not.  For now, it was good.  It took the attention away from him.

"So, what's going on downstairs?" Wesley looked up at the voice.  His tired eyes took on a happier look.

"I'm not sure, really," he said.  "How are you doing?  Better?"  He looked over his companion.  Dark brown shoulder length hair, slightly emaciated frame enclosed in his borrowed clothes, eyes much wiser than their owner's age…  Cordelia Chase looked like a shell of her once lively, outgoing, upbeat self.

"I'm sorry that I just…" she started, hugging herself in the baggy sweater.  Wesley put his crossbow down and crossed the room to her.  He quickly enveloped her in a hug and she curled herself in his arms.

"It's okay, Cordelia.  Everyone's entitled to a good cry now and then…" he said, speaking of their waterlogged reunion.  A muffled laugh came from somewhere underneath her hair.

"That was a little more than a good cry… I think it was a breakdown…" she said, laying her cheek against his shoulder.  They stood like that for a few silent moments before Wes pulled back slightly to look at her.

"As much as I love the fact that you came to me for help, I can't help but wonder why you didn't go to Angel," he said softly, regretting his words at the pain that crossed her face.  Cordelia shook her head emphatically.

"I can't see him… I can't look him in the face and ask him to help me…" she said.  Wesley's brow furrowed.

"Why not?  He'd be more than happy to, I'm sure," he said.  Cordelia's eyes shot up with a hint of surprise in them.  _Didn't Wesley know?  Didn't Angel tell him… tell them all what she had done?_

"I… I just can't Wes… please don't tell him, okay?  Don't tell anyone right now…  I need… to figure some things out first… _please_," she begged, taking a grip on his shirt in an un-Cordy-like, desperate fashion.  Her movement only caused Wesley to become more concerned at the state his friend was in.  His hands came up to lay over hers.

"I won't say anything, Cordy.  I promised already.  Not until you want me to…" he reassured, watching her face relax.  "Why just me, Cordelia?" he asked.  She didn't pretend to misunderstand.  She looked up into his eyes – pained brown ones meeting curious blue ones.

"Because you are the only one of them that would understand," she said.

"Understand what, Cordy?  There's not much that I'm understanding right now," he said, stepping away slightly, only to have Cordelia's grip on him tighten.  She looked at him and saw that he truly did not understand her.  It made the last wall of strength and hope that Cordelia had built crumble.  Tears flowed down her cheeks heedlessly as her hands limply fell from him and she stepped back.  The one thing she needed…  Wes had gone through the same thing.  He'd been to the dark side and had been able to come back.  He'd done the unforgivable, and he'd been forgiven.  She needed him to guide her through it… all of the unknown depths of despair, guilt, anger, fear…  But when she looked in his eyes, she saw none of it.  Not a single trace of what he'd been through.  With a single, painful cry, she sunk to the floor, her face going into her hands.  Wes watched in horror as his friend started to sob.  He quickly sat next to her and pulled her to him.  There were words he felt he should know to help her, words he knew he needed to say… but he _didn't_ know them.  He was drawing a complete blank as to how to comfort the woman in his arms.  

"It will be alright, Cordelia… it will.  I promise," he said as her grief slowly quieted.  He ran a soothing hand over the back of her head and hoped with everything in him that he was right.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Angel indicated for Lindsey to take a seat.

"What can I do for you?" the vampire asked as he watched the former lawyer sit back and place his feet up on the desk.

"So, Angel… how's unlife?" he asked.  Angel resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"Let's cut to the chase, Lindsey.  What do you want?" he asked.  Lindsey shrugged his shoulders and held his hands out.

"Just some chitchat… How's Junior?" he asked, causing Angel to glare.

"You want to chitchat, let's chitchat.  But don't ever bring him up," he said harshly.  Lindsey sat up straight with an interested look.

"Soft spot?  Hmmmm… what happened?" he asked.

"He doesn't exist anymore as my son, so the subject is closed," Angel said.  

"Doesn't exist… meaning no one knows… except you… and me…  It looks like your deal with the devil didn't work out as well as you'd hoped.  And now you're here… It surprisingly explains a lot," Lindsey said, sitting back.

"What are you talking about, Lindsey?"

"Angel, let's think logically here, okay?  Do you think that Wolfram & Hart gave you the 'get Conner-boy out of jail free' card for nothing?  Do you think they spared your friends' memories for nothing?  If you were stupid enough to think that then you are in even more trouble than I suspect you already are," Lindsey said.  Angel thought over the man's words.

"I take it you know about a coming apocalypse…" Angel said with a sigh.  Lindsey watched the vampire carefully for a second.

"Boy, it's really good you're concerned," he noted sarcastically.  Angel sat back in his chair.

"What do you want me to do? Shriek like a little girl?  Wesley's upstairs if you really want that.  Apocalypses come and go… We've averted so many I've lost count," Angel said.  Lindsey stood up.

"Well, I, for one, am glad that you have a new seer.  Because, frankly, I'm a little concerned at what it is exactly _you are seeing," he said.  Angel frowned._

"How did you know about that?" he asked.  Lindsey shrugged.

"I still get the company newsletter…" he said, noting Angel's arched brow.  Lindsey smoothed out the legs of his pants with his hands.  "They're kinda like the mob… you never really get out of it."  Angel stood as well.

"So, what are you doing here then?" he asked.

"I'm here to warn you.  You are being used as a tool of the Senior Partners.  Whether you realize it or not, they are pulling every string you can possibly imagine," Lindsey answered as he made his way to the door.  Angel could only stare for a second.

"I don't get you, Lindsey.  You're good, you're bad… I've had a rogue demon hunter, a rogue slayer… and now a rogue lawyer?" the vampire asked mockingly.  Lindsey shook his head solemnly.

"Think whatever you want.  But you've got the book… I'd start reading if I were you…" he said.

"What do you know about the book?" Angel's voice stopped the other man's hand on the doorknob.  Lindsey smiled to himself.

"Nothing.  Just that its something you'll probably want to check out," he said before turning the knob and opening the door.  "Some answers will be there, but others won't, for reasons I'm sure you'll figure out sooner or later…"  With that, the ex-lawyer left, leaving Angel to mull over the conversation and try to figure out what _wasn't said._

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Hey Watcher!" Spike yelled as he walked straight through Wes' apartment door without a second thought.  Not finding the object of his search in the living room he went back to the bedroom.  The room was dark, but the ghost could see the adjoining bathroom light on, and steam rolling out from under the door.  Rolling his eyes, he started to make his way out of the room, only to stop when he noticed a figure dozing on the rumpled bed.  With a questioning glance at the bathroom and the pile of men's clothes outside the door, Spike stepped closer to the dozing Wesley.

"Watcher!" he said loudly causing the man to jump up, hands fisted and ready to fight.  After gauging his attacker, Wes put his arms down.  He took a moment to stretch and rub his eyes before he turned back to the ghost.

"What are you doing here, Spike?" he asked, watching the blond man's eyes flicker back and forth quickly from him to the bathroom.  After a second, Wes realized who was in that bathroom.

"Umm… I'm steaming the wrinkles out of one of my suits," Wesley covered, causing Spike to look back at him with a disbelieving frown.  "Why are you here?"

"I… had a vision… I need a little help sorting it out…" the vampire admitted.  Wesley blew out a breath.

"Let's go out to the living room and we'll discuss it," he said, indicating for the ghost to follow him.  Spike sent one last glance at the clothes piled in the corner.

"You know, Watcher… it doesn't really matter to me what side of the sexual spectrum you're on…" Spike said with a small smirk towards the watcher.  "I used to be a bloddy vampire… there wasn't much that I _didn't do…"  Wesley glared at Spike before he sat down on the couch._

"I don't even have to dignify that with an answer… Now…  What did you see?" Wes asked as he picked up a notepad.  Spike frowned.

"That's the thing… I don't _know_ what I saw…" he said.  Wes let out a sigh.

"Okay.  Start from the beginning.  Tell me how you saw it, and we'll work from there.  Time is usually of the essence here, so we'll need to hurry it up a bit," he told the ghost.  Spike let out a huff before he launched into his tale.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Cordelia stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel.  The air in the bathroom was still warm as the steam swirled around the room.  A sigh escaped her, her muscles finally relaxed and the emotionally empty feeling enveloped her.  Reaching out, she grabbed Wesley's robe and gratefully stuck her arms into the sleeves.  With her towel, Cordelia wiped the mirror and looked at herself.  The circles under her eyes and the slightly pale complexion told her just how real everything was.  

"This is what a human you looks like, Cordy," she told herself as she turned away from the mirror and ran her hands through her hair.  She'd need to get Wesley to find her stuff… if they hadn't gotten rid of it… like they did her apartment.  Poor Dennis.  Cordelia opened the bathroom and turned off the light as she walked into the bedroom.  Wes had obviously gotten up, she thought with a smile.  The poor guy – she'd blubbered all over him.  As she made her way towards the bedroom door, she picked out another voice other than Wesley's.  She strained her ears to hear another accented voice, but this one deeper.  It was Spike.  She leaned against the doorjamb and heard the word 'vision', her interest immediately perking up.

"… and then there was this baby… Angel was holding it and everyone was standing around it.  It went black after that for a few seconds.  Then there was another flash… It was a boy… a teenager…  He was a scrawny kid…" Spike said.  Cordelia sucked in a breath.  He was talking about Conner!

"Then there was a flash of Cordelia and then the kid again, but with a family.  Then all I saw was black again…"

"What do you mean black?" Cordelia heard Wes ask.  She could picture the frown on her friend's face.

"It's exactly what I said it was… black.  Nothing…  Who was the kid?  And why did I see Cordelia?" Spike asked.  

"I don't know, Spike.  It doesn't seem like you vision gave us anything to help us locate this baby… or this kid… whoever they are.  Is there anything you can focus on that can give us a location?" Wes asked.  Spike frowned as he tried to remember.

"It was at the Hyperion Hotel…" the ghost said, looking at Wes, who had become deathly still.  Cordelia's eyes went wide.  They didn't know anything!  Darla, Conner, Holtz, Wesley's betrayal… anything that dealt with Conner… they didn't know!  Cordelia's hand came up to her mouth in an attempt to cover her shocked, pained gasp.  _What kind of alternate universe did she come back to?!_

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~


	9. Part IX

_**Author's humble thanks:_

**_Michella_**_ … Well, you can see your name again!  And thank you for the ass-kicking remark... it **is** a hobby of mine… :P  Pfft… anyway, I'll stop writing now and go… well, write!  As you ordered, Madame…  Thanks for coming back and reviewing again!  I love it when people do that!_

**_Athlantis_**_ … Yet another loyal reviewer… I love you guys!  And **why** would I take Cordy away?!  She's my favorite character!  But thank you for the incredible compliment about the writers.  It's been a pipe dream of mine, but I live in Nowheresville, Reality.  Chances of writers taking notice, very slim.  Anyways, thanks for reviewing.  Enjoy the next part!_

**_Imzadi_**_ … You have no idea how thrilled I am to have so many loyal readers/reviewers!  And I'm honored that you read even though Spike & Cordelia aren't your #1 characters.  Anyways, you're right about Lindsey… and I'd like to see where I go with this too!  Thanks for taking a look at my correction.  I still apologize for that.  As for a girl for Lindsey… I'm not sure.  I want to give him one, but I don't really like the options.  We'll have to see._

**_Grav_**_ … *wipes multitude of tears from eyes*  Your review was **sooooooo** nice.  Thank you!  It all started with me saying "Where will the visions go?  Wouldn't it be cool if Spike got them?"  Then it progressed into Lorne seeing Cordy's aura and the memories… who knows what's going to happen in my head next…  So, thanks for your compliments.  Color me grateful & touched!!!!_

More gratitude at the end cuz I have so much to give… 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Angel sat in his office and did what he did best… brooded.  He knew that Gunn and Fred were working as hard as they could on the new text, despite Gunn's reluctance to do so.  If only he could figure out what Lindsey had told him.  It didn't make sense.  How could the Senior Partners be using him as a tool when they let him take charge of this place?  What was their purpose... if it was even true?  And how did Lindsey know about Conner?  Things didn't add up…  Like Lindsey being here at all, for starters.  Why did the formerly evil lawyer even care about what happened?  And Cordelia?  What had happened to her?  Was it really her that all of them had heard earlier?  Opening his desk drawer, he pulled out a worn picture… it was of Cordelia holding Conner when he was a baby.  The two people in this world that had meant the most to him… and they were both gone.  He lost Cordelia because he couldn't see what was right in front of him until it was too late.  And Angel lost Conner because he saw just a little_ too_ much.  If Angel had a better sense of humor, he'd laugh at the way fate dangled hope and happiness in front of him only to snatch it away when it was reached for.  But he didn't, so instead he was miserable.  With a growl, he threw the object in his hand down on his desk and spun around in his chair to look out the window.  That picture shouldn't even be there...  In a world where Conner was wiped from everyone's memories, the picture of him and Cordelia should be non-existent.  Yet it was there, as a reminder for Angel.  A reminder of how things could have been…  With a shake of his head, he cleared the morose memories and thoughts from his head as best as he could.  He had another apocalypse to avert and he had to focus on that for now.  Then he could think about other things.  _Maybe this one wasn't as serious_, he thought to himself.  And the ever-Cordy-ready response of _Pffft_ rang through his head.  He waited for the usually biting _In__ your dreams, Broody Boy_, but it never came.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Holy crap!" Fred exclaimed as she looked at one and then another computer.  Gunn's head snapped up from where he had been 'resting' it on the desk in front of his computer.  He stood up and went to stand behind the woman while rubbing his eyes furiously.

"Your 'holy craps' are usually an excited version of your 'oh mys' and are about as significant as Wes' 'eurekas', so I can only take that as a good 'holy crap'.  It is a good one, isn't it?" the black man asked, going from excitement to uncertainty in the space of five or so words.  Fred looked back at him, an understanding smile on her face.

"It's a good 'holy crap'… and least right now.  I've figured out that the language in the book is a conjugate of the early Saxon language with a slight Celtic undertone.  It dates back before the sixth century.  The reason there are no records of the language is because it was never documented. I'll have to ask Wesley to look into this more… he'll know the history behind it and possibly be able to cross-reference enough to make some sense out of what's being said… This is as far as my knowledge can take me," she said.  Gunn put both of his hand on Fred's shoulders.

"Well, girl, this gives us a start.  And that's better than having nothing… Let's go relay this information to our resident book boy…" he said, grinning.  Fred grinned back as she hit the print button on the computer.

"AI, one… apocalypse, zero," she said as she stood and stretched her arms.  

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Cordelia had long since cocooned herself under the blankets of Wesley's bed.  She lay on her side, staring at the wall, with the covers pulled to her ears.  She could deny everything all she wanted, but she knew that when she opened her eyes tomorrow morning, it was still going to be the same.  The Conner that they had known, held, and loved did not exist in this world… which means that everything she had done had not happened… except that it did.  In her world, it did.  Cordelia let out a sigh.  Her eyes were dry… she couldn't cry any more even if she wanted to.  She had to live with her memories.  Another part of her punishment…  At that thought, Cordelia slowly sat up.  There was going to be no sleep tonight.  And from the sounds in the living room, the same was true of Wesley.  Another sigh escaped her as she stood up and wrapped the robe around her tighter.  She went over and peeked out the slightly ajar door.  Wesley was sitting on his couch, leaning over the coffee table reading a stack of papers.  He was alone.

"Wes?" she inquired.  He looked up at her with a small smile.

"Did you sleep at all?" he asked.  Cordelia shook her head.

"Have you?" she asked.  Wes ran a hand through his disordered hair.

"Well… Spike had a vision.  We've been running into dead ends.  I don't know why he had a vision of everyone at the Hyperion…  We haven't been back there in months…  And we've had no leads in that direction at all.  Now, if this were a demon or an ancient language, I could figure this out.  But right now, I'm drawing a complete blank," he said, his tired, bloodshot eyes looking at her.  Cordelia smiled gently as she sat down next to him and rubbed his back.  Of course he was drawing a blank.  What the vision showed didn't exist…  which brought up a question from Cordelia.

"Wes?" she asked, wanting to know his version of everything.  "What happened to me?"  Wes sat back against the couch as he thought back.

"Well… according to what Angel told us… he was with you when you collapsed…" he started.  Cordelia frowned.

"I collapsed?" she asked dubiously.  Wes nodded.

"Yes.  I can't say for sure _what happened, only that Angel brought you in… after that, you were put in the medical wing and hadn't twitched a finger until you disappeared.  We were all frantic to figure out what happened to you, but we had absolutely no idea…" he said.  Cordelia leaned back as she thought over what happened._

"Angel was with me…" she muttered to herself.  Cordelia let her mind wander back through her memories.  If Conner didn't exist… It was so confusing.  What memories were substituted in place of Conner?  What did her friends remember that she, Cordelia, didn't?  The frown on her face deepened as she stood up.  "I don't get it…"

"What don't you get?" Wesley asked, startling her.  She forgot that he could see and hear her.  Cordelia bit her lip in though for a second as she stared at him.

"Nothing, Wes.  I'm just thinking…" she said, pacing slightly.  She suddenly turned to Wesley, a fistful of robe clenched in her hand.

"My stuff, Wes.  Did you guys… you know… get rid of it?" she asked.  Wes looked up, shocked at the question.

"Of course not, Cordelia!  We had every hope that you were going to wake up.  Fred kept reminding us of how you'd react if you woke up and didn't have your clothes.  And lest not we forget how you took it the last time your clothes were… ummm… misplaced…" Wes said.  Cordelia smiled, eyes watering slightly, at the memory.  Her eyes met her friend's with a slight nod of her head.

"Where are you keeping it all?" she asked.  Wesley thought again for a second.

"Angel put it in one of the apartment storage areas…" he said.  Cordelia nodded again.  She debated whether or not to have Wesley go retrieve something suitable for her.  

"Can you take me there?" she asked, deciding against having Wes pawing ineptly through her things.

"Of course," he said, standing up and indicating she follow him out the door.  After a few twists and turns down the hallway, Wes stopped in front of a door.  Using his key he opened the door and reached in to flip on a light.  Cordelia stepped past him to see boxes and boxes of her stuff.  Chuckling to herself, she realized that, surprisingly, a lot of them had clothes written on the.  _Far cry from where you were four years ago, Cor_, she told herself as she reached out and opened the top of one box.  Looking over her shoulder, she saw Wes standing in the door, watching her.

"You can go back if you want Wes.  I may be a little bit," she said.  Wesley smiled gratefully.

"What if someone comes?" he asked, the smile slipping slightly.  Cordelia shrugged.

"It'll be okay.  If someone decides to visit La Boutique Cordelia, I'll hide in the boxes," she said.  Wesley shook his head with a smile before he closed the door to give her some privacy.  Cordelia dived back into the box, pulling blouses and skirts out one by one.  After searching carefully through two more boxes she finally found what she referred to as her 'comfy clothes.'  She quickly pulled out a pair of worn jeans and a soft baggy sweater.  Another rummage through a box brought out other needed items, and she quickly changed.  With a happy sigh, she folded up Wes' robe and set it down.  Floating down memory lane for a moment she ran a hand over the other boxes thinking of everything that had to be in them.  Reaching down into one of the open boxes, she pulled out a picture frame.  It was a picture of her and Wesley in the Hyperion.  With a smile, she laid it down and fingered through other frames.  Fred, Gunn, Lorne at Caritas…  When she picked up one of her and Angel, the back of the frame fell out, causing that picture, plus another to drop.  Curious, she picked it up, only to suck in a breath.  It was Conner… It was a picture of baby Conner!  _How_ could there be a picture of Conner if he wasn't here?  Wesley didn't know, and apparently Spike didn't know either…  And knowing Fred the way she did both Wesley and Spike would know if she knew.  That meant that Gunn didn't know either.  If there was still a picture that meant _someone_ knew… and process of elimination meant… Oh no.  No no, no no, _no_!  Cordelia dropped the picture as if it had burned her and brought her hands up to her forehead.  Angel.  Angel knew.  Angel knew everything.

"Well, well, luv.  I should have known you couldn't stay away forever," Spike's voice suddenly rang out in the silent room.  Cordelia turned swiftly around to face the ghost, who was now leaning carelessly against the door.  He chuckled at the look on her face as he straightened up and walked towards her.  Thinking quickly, Cordelia stepped over the picture, hiding it from the ghost as best she could.

"Spike…" she croaked out as he reached out and tugged on a strand of her hair.  Spike clucked his tongue.

"And back in solid form again.  You're going to have to teach me that trick, luv.  My, how the Powers must like you…" he said, bitterness tingeing his words.  Cordelia shot him a look.

"Jealous, Spike?" she asked.  The look in his eyes made her immediately want to retract her words.  When he made to say something back, she held up her hand.  "I'm sorry, Spike.  I didn't mean that…"  The blond man hesitated a second before he nodded.

"So… what's with the bloody cloak and dagger routine?" he asked after a second.  Cordelia looked at him questioningly.

"What do you mean?" she asked.  Spike chuckled.

"Oh come on.  I hope I don't look _that_ stupid…  You're staying with the Watcher…  I was there earlier.  He was acting strangely… hiding something… or _someone_.  Wasn't sure who, but since you're hiding out in here, I've connected the dots, chit," he said.  Cordelia crossed her arms.

"I'm _not_ hiding out," she said with a glare. This time Spike laughed outright.

"Right… and I'm Martha Stewart… If you're not hiding out, why haven't you ran that cute little cheerleader ass right into the Poofter's arms?" he asked.

"You think my ass is cute?" she asked, her eyes wide.

"Don't change the bloody subject," Spike said with a look.  Cordelia huffed and turned away from him.  There was silence.

"You had a vision earlier," she commented.

"Yeah, what of it?" he asked.  Taking a deep breath, Cordelia bent down and retrieved the picture from the floor.  She needed to trust someone...  She trusted Wesley, but he was too involved in this.  She needed an impartial ear.  

"Is this the baby you saw in it?" she asked as she turned and handed the ghost the picture.  Spike looked down, his eyes suddenly going wide.

"What is this, luv?  What do you know?" he asked, confused.  Cordelia laughed harshly.

"Isn't it great being the all-knowing seer and not really knowing crap?" she asked.  "I certainly don't miss that…"  Spike glowered, holding the picture out.

"I mean it Cordelia… what do you know?" he asked.  Cordelia's bitter bravado dropped to one of resignation.

"Spike, sit down.  You and I are going to have a conversation about stuff that never happened…" she said.  The ghost remained standing as she sat down and leaned back against a box.

"What are you talking about?  What about the Watcher?  Shouldn't he be in on this too?" he asked.  Cordelia shook her head.

"We can't tell Wesley… we can't tell anyone.  After I'm done telling you, I need to see someone…" she said.  Spike was quiet for a moment.

"Angel?" he asked.  Cordelia's brown eyes looked up at him, and he could see that she was struggling.

"Yes…" she said finally.  Their eyes held for a few moments more before he sat down next to her.

"Start talking…" he said.               

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_**More review thank yous & comments (these are gettin' long, ain't they?):_

**_Blaire_**_ … Holy wow with the absolutely wonderful long constructive review!  Thank you!  I'm sorry that I've confused you with a few things.  With the Lindsey issue, he kind of left with a 'hanging in the balance' attitude.  I certainly didn't know where he stood with everyone.  The way everyone greeted him was a 'holding of the breath' moment to see what was going to happen (plus, he never really was in it bad with Lorne).  He came back to see Angel.  They've worked together before… I can see them doing it again.  And who says they're going to be friends through it?  As for Lindsey being good?  Are you sure there aren't ulterior motives?  Not saying that's the way it is, but it's a thought, right?  And yes, Cordy chose to be human.  I'll explain why later, just be patient… :P  I'm anxious to write the reasons, but it's not the right time, yet.  The what's-gonna-happen moment with Wesley **was Cordy, but Lindsey's arrival covered everyone else finding out about it.  It was why Wes was uncomfortable when he met up with them.  And Spike not knowing… well, I fixed that question for you, didn't I?  I had that part written before your review, so I was getting there.  There are methods to my insanity. :)  Lorne… ah… I love Lorne.  He **is** the refreshing bit to keep viewers from sinking into depression every time they watch with all the drama and crap…  And don't worry, I totally got the Cordycrumb connection… and I agree 100%.  And thank you… I love the Cordy/Wes scene too.  I've always like the two of them.  Wes was there through most of the crap that she and Angel had been through.  He helped pick up the pieces when Doyle died, so I can see him help picking up the pieces here as well.  Only in a more mature & consciously helpful way since he's grown into himself more.  Anyways, I've rambled on and on… I'm going to cut off now.  More thank yous to write.  So, again, THANK YOU for your wonderful review.  You have no idea what it means to a writer (or myself specifically) to see someone take such an interest and really express what they're thinking!  So, let me know how you liked this part!!  :)**_

**_Giggleboxsam_**_ … I want to thank you for the wonderful "constructive" criticism… as much as everyone says they love it, I know I can't please everyone.  And for awhile there, I was trying to.  Now that I've got the story going, I'm going to stick with it as is.  I'm not completely pleased with it as it is, either, but I'm hoping to get it turned around and going the way I want it to.  Expect some twists from the way everyone seems to be expecting it to go.  As for Spike with the visions?  Well, I'm sorry you don't like it, but it was a story starter.  Whether or not he keeps them remains to be seen.  And the memories?  Trust me, I'm planning a twist with that, don't worry.  So come on back and keep letting me know if it's up to par… Thanks again!_

**_Genevieve_**_ … Hello again!  I'm glad she's back too!  As for her being punished… I have a little behind the scenes plot working.  It'll all be revealed at some time in the future, don't worry.  As for Conner – I'm still deciding what, exactly, I want to do with him.  And Angel & Cordy?  My fingers are itching to write the reunion.  I have to work my way towards it.  It'll come when it's ready to.  And Cordy going to Wes, not Angel?  Again, it will be revealed.  Just not yet.  Don't worry, though… I love rambling reviews!!_

**_The 2nd Evil_**_ … Why thank you!  I can't wait for more either!  :)  The vision is to serve a higher purpose… Bring Conner back?  Maybe.  To the group?  We'll see…  And may I ask, was that a hint on how to spell Conner?  I spell it with an "e" because I have a good friend that spells it that way.  It's habit… so everyone will have to grin and forbear…:)_

**_Just Another Angel_**_ … I'm really glad you are enjoying this!  And only after 2 chapters!  I hope I don't disappoint…  And please!  Sleep!  I don't want to interfere with bosses or the millions of things you need to do.  It'll be here when you get back (I promise)!  And how can I keep you sane when I can barely do the same for myself? :P  Okay – back to work for me before my boss gives me that "You're insane" look.  Thanks again & let me know if you like the rest!!_


	10. Part X

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Cordelia finished telling the story to a shocked Spike, tears dripping off her chin unnoticed by either one of them as she re-lived the pain.  If it could have been possible, the ghost would have been paler than he already was.  Silence fell as the blond man absorbed everything that Cordelia had told him.  Cordelia buried her head in her knees to try to gain control over her emotions.  The memories of her helpless self battling against the violation of both her mind and body were harsh and unforgiving.  They wouldn't let her go.  A smoothing hand on her back caused Cordelia to look up.  She saw a concerned Spike watching her, feeling suddenly guilty for the way he'd greeted her.

"I'm sorry, luv… If I'd known… I was an ass, I'm sorry," he said seriously.  Cordelia reached up and wiped the final tears from her cheeks.

"It's okay.  It had nothing to do with you, you couldn't have known.  The crying is my own pity party," she said, sitting up and taking a deep breath.  Spike shook his head.

"No, seriously.  I think me being an ass is a part of my genetic makeup or something…  Dru, Buffy, you…" he said.  Cordelia laughed slightly.

"Don't be so hard on yourself… you _were_ a vampire…" she said.  Spike pulled his hand back to his lap.

"This Conner kid… I feel like he's an important part of everything…" he said, changing the subject.  Cordelia nodded.

"He was… he was a human child born of two vampires... his being here inevitably led to Angel being here… It led to Wesley almost dying… it led to that _thing_ taking over my body and ruining everything…  As much as I loved that little baby and the boy he ended up growing into, I wish I couldn't remember like everyone else…" she said.  Spike shook his head.

"That isn't what I was talking about, luv.  I mean I feel he's important for later… it's why I got the vision…" he said.  Cordelia nodded her head.

"Being a seer means you get all the feelings.  And you have to trust them.  So if you say that… Conner… is going to be important, then I believe you," she said.  Spike watched her for a second.

"How does it feel for you?" he asked.  Cordelia's eyes stayed on her hands.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"To not have the visions anymore," he said.  Cordelia's eyes watered once more, but she held them back, determined to not cry anymore.  It made her feel weak.

"I feel like an arm has been cut off," she said honestly.

"Maybe the Powers can give them back to you.  You have an in with them, tell them what you want," he said.  Cordelia shook her head.

"I can't.  This is what they want.  I made my choice," she said.  Spike ran an appraising eye over her.

"What a stellar choice, luv… you're miserable," he concluded.  This time Cordelia's laugh rang true.

"Oh, I'm not miserable, Spike.  Not really.  I have a small purpose here – not like I did before, but I still have it," she said.  Spike looked at her questioningly, but refrained from commenting on it.

"Can I ask what all the choices were?" he asked.  She smiled.

"To die, to be a Power, or to live," she listed quickly, not dwelling on any of them.

"Bloody hell, I'd have taken the Power trip," he said, causing her to grin.  He grinned back.

"Yeah, well… it was tempting.  Each choice would have made me give up something.  Dying or becoming a Power would have cost me my chance to help my family.  Sure, living again means losing the visions and my demony powers… but if I can pull my friends out of this mistake, I can humanly die happy… and in a way, avenged," she said honestly.  "Our family was about friendship, loyalty and the good fight.  Right now, I can see one thing that even remotely embodies any one of those in anyone.  They were all preyed upon, and it's slowly sucking all of the good out of what they are doing.  They'll end up damning themselves if they don't figure it out.  Hopefully, I can help them do that."  

"Well, luv… all of what you just said goes to prove that you are a better person than most…" Spike said, looking at her in admiration.  Cordelia shook her head.

"No, it doesn't Spike.  I'm still as stupid, naïve, and selfish as the rest of the world… but with better accessorizing skills," she said, a smirk ending her statement as she tried to lighten the mood.  Spike chuckled as he stood up, knowing that Cordelia's meager information supply was at its end.

"You can take the human out of the cheerleader, but you can't take the cheerleader out of the human," he said, causing Cordelia to laugh and stand up with him.

"That's right, baby.  The bitch _is_ back," she said with a grin.  He turned to her, his grin faded only slightly as concern seeped into his eyes.

"Well then, with that attitude, are you ready to go talk to Peaches about all of this?" he asked.  Cordelia's grin slipped off her face quicker than it had appeared.  She hugged herself tighter as she braced herself.

"I'll never be ready, Spike… but I have to do it.  Only you can't come with me," she said.  Spike reeled at her words.

"Why the bloody hell not?  He needs to know about the vision, and…" Spike said.

"No!  Let me talk to him first, okay?  Wes, Gunn, Fred and Lorne are all in the dark.  If you start blabbing on about the vision and that Wes knows, he'll panic and do something stupid.  It's Angel we're talking about… you know… rip heads off first, ask questions later?" she said.

"Ummm, excuse the insubordination, Oh Supreme One," Spike said as Cordelia rolled her eyes. "But let's compare, shall we?  Ghost… human… which one do you think he'll be successful in pulling a head off of?"  He pointed between himself and Cordelia.  She was silent for a second as she gritted her teeth.

"You can come if you want… but keep your mouth shut about everything until I bring it up, okay?" she asked.  Spike shrugged nonchalantly.

"Whatever," he said, following the woman out of the storage room.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Wesley checked his watch again for the hundredth time.  She'd been in there for over an hour.  How long could it take for that girl to find something to wear?  Check that… it was Cordelia.  It could take her longer.  Wes sat back in his chair with a sigh.  But then again…  He stood up and went to the door.  Her frame of mind wasn't exactly healthy… she seemed to be catapulting from fine to not-so-fine in such short intervals that it was beginning to worry him.  An hour alone by herself… with her old stuff… couldn't be healthy for her at this juncture.   He reached the storage room door and knocked lightly.

"Cordelia?" he asked lightly, looking around the hallway to make sure no one heard his inquiry.  "Are you alright, Cordy?"  Not hearing anything, he entered the room.  It was vacant.  Wesley frowned as he picked up his folded, discarded robe.  Where did she go?  Grumbling to himself about willful females, he pulled open the door and stepped out into the hallway… right into Gunn and Fred's rushing path.  He pulled up just short of hitting the two.

"Gunn!  Fred!  Where are you rushing to?" Wes asked.  Fred turned to him with a grin.

"Wesley!  I think we may have found something.  We need you to look at this," she said excitedly indicating the book in her arms.  Wes' eyes scanned the hallway quickly, but nervously.

"Well… let's go back to my place and we'll sit down and discuss whatever it is you may have found," he said, taking the young woman's arm and starting down the hall.

"Yo man," Gunn's voice broke out.  "What were you doing in there?"  Wes looked back to see the bald man pointing to the storage room.  Fred turned and looked to where Gunn was indicating.

"That's Cordy's stuff," she said sadly.  The two men looked at her sympathetically before Wes cleared his throat and indicated the robe he held.

"One of my boxes from moving in mistakenly got mixed with hers.  I finally found it last week," he said smoothly.  Gunn shrugged his shoulders.

"Dude, I still haven't found two of mine… did you see them in there?" he asked.  Wes shook his head as they continued walking.

"So, Fred… tell me what it is you think you found," Wes said as they made it to his door and opened it.  Fred ran into the apartment and plopped the book down on the coffee table.  Looking like a little girl at Christmas, she opened up the text and laid out her printouts and notes.

"Well, I've checked through all of the different language databases and through all of them, I pulled up about 700 possible matches.  Charles and I have been going through each of them and I think I may have found the answer.  Take a look at these," she said, pointing to the papers.  Wes pushed his glasses further up on his nose and sat down next to the scientist.  His eyes scanned over what Fred had found and then he took a closer look at the text.

"Amazing…" he murmured, his hands running over the words in the book.  "It looks like it's a hybrid of the languages we now identify as Saxon and Celtic.  Some of these words look to be a part of the Anglo-Saxon heritage, but they are different enough to say for sure that they aren't.  The others suggest an ancient Celtic heritage.  If I am correct in my assumption, I would say this dates back to before the Dark Ages.  It would certainly explain why there is no known record of this text…  Western Europe, in the early anno Domini* centuries, was a war-torn preliterate society...  No known records from that time exist…" 

"Until now," Gunn commented as he leaned over the back of the couch.  Wes looked over his shoulder at his friend.

"We still don't know exactly what this text contains…" he said before looking back to the book.

"Well, the plus side in this is we've found yet another text older than Angel…  Man, I'm starting to see 250-some years as _young_…" Gunn said as he leapt over the side of the couch and made himself comfortable.  Fred smiled as she, too, leaned over the text.

"What are you thinking Wesley?" she asked.  Sitting up, he placed his chin in his hand.

"Well, I think we should probably inform Angel of your findings.  But, I certainly would like to go over this a few more minutes and get some concrete information," he said.  Fred nodded.  "Fred, go over to my computer and log onto the database… I'm going to have you do some cross-referencing of some words that I'm able to pull out.  I want to see if I can start making some sense of this.  Gunn, I need you to go over to that bookshelf and find the text I have on early European languages."  Fred and Gunn both jumped up to do Wes' bidding as the Englishman hunched over the gibberish-looking words.  Wes smirked as Gunn started humming the tune of a familiar song.

"_You wanna stay alive, better do what you can, so beat it, just beat it…"_ the man sang out.  It occurred to Wes that Michael Jackson probably didn't envision his lyrics being used at such a moment… or so horribly.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Spike peeked around the corner and saw that it was empty.  He gestured for Cordelia to follow him.  She wished, suddenly, that she had taken the time to put socks on her bare feet as she tiptoed down the cold tile to where Spike was standing.

"This is it, luv," he said.  Cordelia eyed the door warily, wanting to run in, but not wanting to go at all at the same time.

"He's in there?" she whispered.  Spike smiled gently before he nodded.

"It'll be okay," he said, causing Cordelia to smile back.  Taking a deep breath she put her hand on the doorknob.

"Now or never," she said as she turned it and pushed her way in.  She took a look around the office.  It was nice.  A little less dungeon-like than his past offices.  Still dark, though.  Some things never changed.  She only hoped it looked a little livelier during the day.

"Well… it looks like _someone_ moved up in this crazy world," she said.  Her heart hammering in her chest as she spoke to the back of his head.  Suddenly, his chair spun around and the expression on his face was priceless.

"Cor… Cordelia?" he stammered.  Again, some things never changed.  She smiled lightly as she put her hands on her hips.

"In the flesh," she said.  He stood up, but didn't move beyond that.  His chocolate eyes were locked on hers.  After a second, he let his gaze move over her.  She was wearing her clothes, but they were baggy on her.  She'd lost weight since her stay in the medical wing.  Her eyes had circles under them and her face looked drawn.  Even devoid of all makeup, she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.  But still, he didn't move towards her.

"Is that all you're going to say?" she asked, approaching his desk and parking herself on the edge of it.  "Don't you have questions… demands?"  Angel continued to watch her, not saying anything.  When it was obvious that he was still too shocked to say anything, she looked back to Spike, who closed the door.  She turned back to Angel, a firm look now on her face as she calmly placed her hands in her lap.

"Well, then.  Since you don't have any questions or demands, I certainly do…" 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_* Note: [A.D.] is the abbreviated form of 'anno Domini'… Today we live in the 21st century anno Domini.  Everything before 1 A.D. is considered [B.C.] or 'before Christ'.  Anno Domini is also used in conjunction with 'in the year of the Lord' [L.]  This period is noted as the Christian era…  _ 

_**A/N – First off, any research I did for this part was NOT extensive… lazily not so, in fact…  It may be correct, it may not be… for whatever purposes, I don't care.  It just fits…  And second… I have no opinion whatsoever in Michael Jackson's personal life shenanigans so I don't want to hear anything about it… I just like his earlier music and it fit the moment, that's why Gunn was singing lyrics from 'Beat It'._


	11. Part XI

_** **A/N:  PLEASE **forgive me for the long time away and for the extra long (be prepared!) thanks for all of the reviews… I know it's been a while and you are all free to hate me all you want (just don't hate my story because of it, I beg you) for keeping you on edge with a cliffhanger and then leaving it like that.  My mind was about to go crazy (it actually **IS** but I'm still in denial) with all of the different stories I've got going on.  Pat me on the back, I finished one, which is why I am back here and dedicating all my pain and frustration to this.  You'll definitely have to be patient with me… the plot for this one comes and goes and changes every minute.  So there will be times, I'm absolutely sure, that I'll need a break to straighten my thoughts out.  I apologize in advance for that.  Anyways, here's the next part.  I hope you all like it!_

_**A/T: _

**_Blaire_**_ … I was on a kick this last time… that's why the updates were so quick.  I thought the chapters were rather intriguing as well.  We'll see what the shock value of Fred's "something" later.  I really haven't decided on what I want where that's concerned.  I have two ways I can go and I'm weighing the possible pitfalls of each.  It's quite daunting, really.  As for Cordy – I really like her hiding out with Wes, too… The hiding will have to come to an end, but that bond will still be evident, have no fear.  Anyways – I'd better go… my A/Ns are getting to be quite long.  Thank you AGAIN for your wonderful review… they always make me smile! :)_

**_Grav_**_ …  To answer your question… yes – I think Spike can close doors.  I'm going off the ending of the Reaper episode where he picks up the mug or whatever.  I'm also going off the Patrick Swayze "Ghost" mindset.  Color me __Hollywood__ influenced…  Put your mind to anything, you can accomplish it and all that crap.  Those are the thoughts running through my head.  Thanks for your comment about the characterizations.  I strive to make them as close to character as I can possibly get them.  I appreciate you coming back & sticking with the story.  Thanks!_

**_Genevieve_**_ … I **live **to spoil!  I know I've got such great reviewers, that's why!  When I read what everyone has to say, my mind takes off and I want to write more for you all.  It's an addiction.  Yes, Conner will be important… but I've said it before and I'll say it again – expect the unexpected where that plotline is concerned.  At least, that's how I've got it planned.  And wow, now that I've read through your favorite lines… I'm giggling.  I think they're **my** favorites too!  Thanks for pointing them out!  I'm glad you liked them & thanks for the review…_

**_Elisa_**_ … Thank you!  I hope you enjoy the next part! :)_

**_Imzadi_**_ … It's always great to see your name in the reviews.  Thank you… I'm glad that you think that.  As for Lindsey, worry not.  "Rogue lawyer", I think, is a description that fits him well… if you catch my drift.  And I have a feeling a little bit of revenge is justified, don't you?_

**_Yama-Neko_**_ … Thank you very much.  I appreciate your confidence in the story.  And I thought the 'Beat It' reference was funny too… I was humming the song while I was writing so I had to put it in!  :)  Enjoy the next part!_

**_Michella_**_ … Thank you!  Here it is!_

**_Sarah_**_ … A new reviewer!  Welcome and enjoy!  I'm ecstatic that you like it!_

**_Athlantis_**_ … Thank you for coming back & reviewing!  As for the punishment… it is all a mater of opinion… you'll see later on!  And I miss the trust & underlying tenderness between Wes/Cordy so I had to write a part in that really hit it home again…_

**_Diana Troy_**_ … Thank you for the repeat reviews!  I always appreciate a reader that goes through and writes their thoughts down every once in awhile while they are reading through the piece whether or not it's the last updated chapter or not.  I really miss Cordelia and her comedic elements as well… And thank you for your positive words, it keeps me writing!  I hope you enjoy the next part!_

**_Giggleboxsam_**_ … Good to see ya back!  And I'm really glad that you're still reading it!  I hope this next part meets your expectations!! :P_

**_Lexie_**_ … Sorry it's taken me so long!  I hope you like this!  Please let me know!_

**_Elf3748_**_ … Yeeeeees… I did end it there… As for your questions… **will** Cordy get her visions back?  **Will** there be a Spike/Buffy reunion?  I really don't know! (Now much help, am I?!)  You'll just have to continue reading to find out, huh?! :P _****

**_Anne_**_ … Thank you so much for the kick in the butt… it's been a while and I apologize profusely!  I've been waiting forever too, it seems.  The inspiration finally kicked in since one piece of the proverbial writing pie has finally been finished off.  Lately, I haven't been multi-tasking well, so I told myself I needed to finish one story completely before I can try to concentrate.  So I did, and now I'm back.  Let's see how this part is to your liking… let me know! _

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Wes sat back and stretched with a yawn.  The minutes had turned into longer.  Looking at his watch he noticed that it was almost three in the morning.  The three of them had been working for almost an hour.    His stacks of papers in front of him didn't bring up anything conclusive, but he was starting to get the hang of some of the translations.  Or at least he _thought_ he was.  There really was no way to be sure until he got more done.  But they had a little to go on, and Wes figured it was probably time to tell Angel about what was going on.  To tell him about the text… and the vision.  Wesley still had no clue as to what exactly the vision was trying to tell them.  The only thing he could do at this point was hope that it didn't involve another baby sacrificing… those situations usually turned out stickier than any of them wanted to deal with.  With a sigh, he sat back on the couch.  He looked over to see Gunn dozing away in one of the chairs.  Fred, bless her heart, was still mesmerized by the glow of the computer.  But rather than working studiously at it, it looked like the machine had finally worked its magic and she was staring at it as if in a trance.  Wes stood up with a chuckle.  He crossed the room to where Gunn sprawled.  With a gentle shake, Wes attempted to wake the sleeping man.  Gunn shot up out of the chair and promptly brought his hands up to defend himself.

"Whaasssit?  Whoooosit?" he cried out incoherently.  The sudden sound broke Fred out of her trance-like state and she practically fell out of her chair.  Gunn looked around for a second before his eyes landed back on Wesley, the axe that had been previously next to the chair dangling in his hands.

"Yo, dog, don't you know to let sleeping black men with weapons lie?  I coulda taken your head off, man," he said with another yawn.  Fred approached them, rubbing the bridge of her nose.

"What time is it, Wesley?" she asked    

"It's about a few hours past time for bed," he said wearily.

"Do you think Angel is still awake?" she queried.  Wes shrugged his shoulders.

"I wouldn't have any idea, he seems to keep some unruly hours as of late," he said as he looked around the apartment.  _Where was Cordelia?_  The thought came unbidden to his mind when he realized that she had never returned.  The concern that something had happened to her again etched itself on his face.

"Wesley?  Are you alright?" Fred's soft voice broke into the recesses of his mind.  Wes shook his head.

"Yes.  Thank you.  I'm fine," he said.  "Just a little tired."  Gunn smothered a loud yawn.

"Yeah… I feel ya.  Anyways, let's go see if Angel's up still.  If he ain't, we call all go crash.  If he is, we can knock him out, and then go crash," he said.  Fred smiled.

"I like your options, Charles," she said.  Gunn smiled as he shrugged.

"Either way, I see this ending with feather pillows and conversations with the sandman… at least for me," he said.

"Gunn, the sandman is a mythical creature from fairy tales that was fabled to make children sleepy by throwing sand in their eyes," Wes chided.  Gunn let out a snort.

"You're telling me that after battles with slime demons, vampires, things with eyes in the back of their heads, mystical shrouds of whatever, zombie policemen, and evil hands that you don't believe in the sandman?" the black man asked, incredulous.

"Well, no," Wesley admitted, causing Fred and Gunn to exchange amused glances.

"It's good to know that everything fantastical has been stuffed into you yet," Gunn said.  Wes just shook his head as he picked up his scattered notes and stuffed them carefully into the pages of the book before closing it.

"Well, chances are, he'll be in bed.  But let's go make sure.  I'd rather not hold this off from him any longer.  He could be of some assistance," he said as he made his way to his apartment door.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Angel had yet to let the shock wear off.  His eyes watched ever single movement the pacing girl in front of him.  She was here, she was breathing and he could hear her racing heartbeat.  She'd been pacing in front of him for about ten minutes now, her hands alternating from waving wildly in the air to resting on her hips.  She seemed to be yelling about something, but he couldn't say what.  All of his attention was given to the fact that she was in front of him looking more Cordy-like than ever – despite the weight loss.  His ears perked up and caught the end of what had to have been a demeaning diatribe.

"… stupid, idiotic, brainless vampire!  I don't understand you, and I don't want to!  This is absolutely ridiculous!" she said, stopping her tirade and just pacing.  Angel looked over at Spike.  The blond seemed to be enjoying Cordelia's show quite a bit.  Finally, Cordelia stopped pacing and looked to the vampire.  With a frustrated growl, she threw up her hands when she noticed the puppy dog look still present on his face and the brow still creased in lack of comprehension.

"You didn't hear a damn thing I said, did you?!" she asked, turning away from him.

"Cordelia?" he asked again.  When she turned around to give him a scathing retort, she let out a little shriek when she found him directly in front of her, the bodies parted only by inches.  His cool hand came up to touch her face and she found that anything she had wanted to say had vacated her mind.  "How?"  Her eyes fell to the ground, away from his at his question.

"Is that all you can say right now?  My name?" she asked, avoiding answering.  Cordelia heard Spike shift behind her before she heard his voice.

"You'll have to forgive the wanker, love.  I believe that he's just had the shock of his non-lifetime," he said.  Cordelia turned her head to give him a glare.

"When I want your play by play, Spike, I'll ask for it," she said.  Spike held up his hands with a grin.

"Sorry love.  You'll never hear me defending the bastard again, forgive my sentimental moment," he said.  With a wink in Angel's direction, he added for the vampire's benefit, "Feisty little minx, in't she?"  Angel growled low in his throat, but stopped when Cordelia laid a hand on his chest.

"Stop it Angel," she said, a heavy look in her eyes.  He caught his animosity towards his childe and calmed himself.  He reached up and grasped Cordelia's shoulders.

"How did you get back, Cordy?" he asked softly, still incredulous that she was in front of him and he was touching her.

"Angel, that doesn't matter," she said.  "There are other things that you need to concern yourself with."

"Like what?" he asked.  Her eyes held fire for a second.

"At the sake of _repeating_ myself," she ground out.  "I'd say where your'e working is a primary concern.  Among other troublesome things…"  Angel let go of her shoulders and turned from her.

"I don't want you to start, Cordelia.  Wolfram & Hart is under control," he said stiffly.  Cordelia let out a little laugh – bitter enough to make Spike wince.

"What did you expect me to do, Angel?  Run into your arms out of gratefulness?  Without a few tongue lashings?  You should know me better than that," she said.  He turned back to look at her.

"You have no say in what I do now, Cordelia!  You were gone, I made decisions.  It's done and it's for the best," he said.  Cordelia's eyes narrowed and her arms crossed over her chest.

"For the best?  This certainly isn't for the best.  So that leads me to another question…  Are you talking about Conner?" she asked.  A wave of smugness washed over her as Angel's eyes went abnormally wide.

"What are you talking about?" he rasped out, eyes darting between the woman and the ghost, who now seemed to have taken a supreme interest in the conversation.  Cordelia waved a hand.

"I know everything, Angel… and so does Spike.  He had a vision," she said.  Angel turned to the ghost, his eyes almost turning yellow in his anger.

"You know and you didn't say a damn thing!?" he said.  Spike shrugged.

"I had no clue what was going on or who the kid was, so I went to a person who might be able to shed some light on it," the ghost explained.

"You went to Cordelia?" the vampire asked stupidly.  Spike just grinned.

"No… the watcher," he took a great amount of pleasure in seeing Angel's game face flicker.

"Wesley knows!" he almost wailed.  Cordelia stepped in front of Spike, more to get the angry vampire's attention than to ward off any acts of violence.

"No…" she said softly, her quietness penetrating Angel's angry fog more than anything else could have.  "Wesley does not _know_ in the knowing sense.  Spike told him about the vision, but it didn't explain anything.  Wes was completely clueless, and he will be until you tell him, Angel."  Angel shook his head.

"No.  It's better that no one remembers.  Conner needs a normal life and everyone needs to be spared the memory of him," he said.  Anger flashed over Cordelia's face again.

"At what cost, Angel?" she asked.  Throwing her arms up, she turned.  "He's part of a vision!  It's obvious that your little plan has backfired.  He's going to be involved in something… and from what I feel, it's going to be big!  It's not going to help that no one can remember him!  One way or the other, everyone's going to have to encounter him and everyone's going to have to remember their connection to him!"  Suddenly a clearing of a throat caused everyone to turn.  In the doorway stood Wesley with Lorne, Gunn and Fred behind him, peeking around to get a look at the obvious scene.

"May I ask, connection to whom?" he asked.  Cordelia floundered for an answer.

"No one, Wes.  Angel and I were just arguing…" she said as she crossed the room to him.  His blue eyes noted the anger, confusion and frustration flowing beneath the surface of her greeting on her face.  He laid a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Is this where you've been?" he asked.

"Cordelia?" Fred squeaked, her eyes wide in disbelief as they took in the other girl's appearance in the flesh.  Cordelia flashed a reassuring smile in the astonished scientist's direction, and gave one to an equally stupefied Gunn and Lorne as well.

"I've been here and there, Wes.  I was on my way back to your place before I got sidetracked here," she told him.

"You were with Wes all this time??" Angel asked.  Cordelia spun around.

"Where I was and who I was with is none of our concern!  But yes, I was with Wes.  When I woke up, I was confused, angry, scared… and I needed his help.  So I went to him first," she explained to everyone.   

"Oh, so you can run into _Wesley's_ arms, Cordelia?" Angel said with mocking force, startling everyone in the room except the woman at which his ire was pointed.

"Don't you _dare_ preach to me about anything like that, Angel!  You, calling the goddamn kettle black," she hissed.  The vampire calmed himself in varying degrees and his eyes were full of confusion.

"What are you talking about?" he asked.  Cordelia let an evil smirk play itself over her features.

"I know about Sunnydale, Angel.  I know about the amulet, The First, the final battle… and everything that happened in between," she said.  Spike's head shot up at Cordelia's words, his stare focused on the dark vampire.  Angel's mind rushed back to the memory.  The amulet, Buffy, the kiss… the conversation.

"How…" he started.  Cordelia shook her head.

"My _body_ may have been stuck here," she said, emphasizing the word 'stuck' for his benefit, "but _I was elsewhere."  It took Angel a few moments, but what she was saying - and what she _wasn't_ saying - finally broke through.  It seemed to make sense to everyone else as well._

"It wasn't you…" Lorne said, saying his first words since the shock of seeing Cordelia.  Cordelia resisted the urge to say _No shit Sherlock_ since she knew it would have been her hurt prompting it.

"We thought it was an _evil_ you, but instead, it just wasn't you at all," the green demon said, pain and regret lacing his voice.  Cordelia's silence confirmed his words.  Fred rushed forward and immediately latched herself to the taller woman.

"Oh Cordy!  We're so sorry!  We should have known," she wept into her friend's arms.  Cordelia's arms came up automatically to soothe her.

"It's okay, Fred, really," she assuaged.  Noticing the overwhelmed look on Cordelia's face, Gunn stepped forward and gently unfastened the willowy brunette from Cordelia.  Wes cleared his throat again, bringing everyone's attention back to him.

"I'm terribly sorry to interrupt this reunion, but there are more pressing matters," he said importantly, ignoring Angel's growl.  The ex-Watcher held the book up so that everyone could see it.  Gunn found a chair with a huff.   
"I see it's time for me to start knocking some people out," he said crankily, a hand rubbing over his tired face.  Cordelia turned to him with a bemused look.

"Not looking forward to the hours upon hours of research, Gunn?" she asked.  "We all know it's your favorite part…"  Gunn gave her a rude hand gesture and muttered something about staying in the higher planes.  The woman the comment was aimed at just shook her head.

 "Well!  Who twisted the thumb up your butt the wrong way?" Cordelia retorted as she watched the bald man balance a dagger unproductively on his forefinger.  Gunn glared at her.

"Don't start with me, Queenie," he said.  Cordelia let out an undignified 'Pffft' as she turned away from him.

"Have I really been gone so long that you can't remember it's Princess, lamebrain?" she asked sarcastically.  When she turned back to look at him, he was grinning at her.  Wes had his familiar happy-yet-looking-somewhat-constipated look on his face.  Both Fred and Lorne had tears shimmering in their eyes.  It warmed her heart to back in the thick of things again.  When she turned to look at Angel again, he was looking at her with no expression.  The warmth that had spread through her cooled considerably.  Cordelia inwardly rolled her eyes.  _What did she expect from Angel?  _

"And this one…" she addressed everyone as she pointed at Angel "… seems to have his whole hand stuck up his butt.  It may be in everyone's best interest if we _do give that situation a little twist."  She emphasized her point with a flick of her wrist, causing a snort of a suppressed chuckle to come from Gunn.  Even Wes had to choke down a laugh.  Angel, his mood blackening every second she stood there acting like her old self – yet different - stood up straight.  All eyes went to him, anticipating what was sure to be a comeback.  Instead, he surprised them all by walking across the room and out the door.  Five pairs of looked between each other, not knowing what to say.  Cordelia, hiding the hurt, shrugged her shoulders._

"Screw him," she said as she stalked behind his large desk and took her seat in his chair.  She swiveled the chair around to see her five companions gaping at her.  "What?" she asked with faux innocence.  Wes cleared his throat uncomfortably.

"Well, for starters, Cordelia…" he started but she waved a hand, cutting him off.

"No, Wes.  No 'for starters' cuz this girl knows where it's going to lead.  No.  I want to know what you've found," she said.  Wes looked between Fred and Gunn before looking back at her.

"Well, we should probably tell Angel about this…" he said.  Cordelia let out her patented 'Pffft' again as she waved another hand.

"Wesley, stop being Angel's bitch!" she said.  Wes stepped back slightly, the harshness of her words hitting somewhere near his heart.  "You can tell Angel when he's being less of a jackass."  Wesley only nodded once at her authoritarian voice.  It was her 'don't mess with me' voice.  Wes looked closer at the girl.  _Where was the girl that had sobbed in his arms?  He stepped closer to the desk and held out the book that he had cradled in his arms.  She took it from him and placed it in front of her.  After inspecting it for a few seconds, she looked up.  And for a second, Wes saw the uneasiness and the slight fear behind her dark eyes before she masked it over again.  It was then that he realized that her shields had gone up.  She was preparing for a battle… but against what… or _who_… he had no clue. _

"What have you found, Wes?" she asked cautiously, but Wes knew better.  He knew that she was looking to him for reassurance.  He cleared his throat as the hurt from before melted away.

"Well, I've translated some of first few pages… it's still a little shaky, but I think I've got the grasp of it.  It'll take some time to get some meat from it, but if I keep at it for the next couple of days, I should have it," he explained.  Everyone in the room listened avidly to what he thought was the origins of the book.  He was about to break into a discussion of the two sets of derivations he'd gotten from the text and what he thought they were heading towards when he was interrupted.   

 "Oh bloody hell…" Spike's voice suddenly broke into the tension that filled the room.   Cordelia's eyes went immediately to him.  He was holding a hand over his eyes.  Cordelia stood up and crossed the room to him.

"Is it a vision?" she asked.  Spike glared at her from under his hand.

"No, it's a bloody hangover… of course it's a vision," he said harshly.  Cordelia glared right back.

"No need to get testy, Billy Idol… geez," she said as she stepped back.  Spike shook his head as soon as the images stopped scrolling through his head.

"Could we possibly patch this telly into the nudie channels?  I can tell you now that it would be so much more fun," he said with a growl.  Cordelia smirked.

"Isn't slash and gore T.V. about the same thing to you?" she asked.  Spike just rolled his eyes.

"It would have been, if I were still a bloody vampire, love," he said.   Cordelia just chuckled.

"What did you see?" she asked.  Spike looked up.

"The whelp again.  But he wasn't the main player… there was something in a robe, the bloody book again, and green fire…" he said.

"Anything occurring now or going to be occurring anytime in the very near future?" Cordelia asked, her panic hidden by her purpose.  Spike looked to concentrate for a second.

"No," he said.  "We have some time.  How much, I don't bloody know…"  Cordelia nodded.

"That's good," she said.  "With this book seemingly in the middle of things, the more time we have to uncover everything in it, the better."  With a feeling of unease Wesley looked down at the book as if it had sprouted wings.

"I have a feeling things are about to get a little more lively," he muttered, causing everyone to look over at him.

"Um, excuse me…" Fred's voice cut through the dead silence.  Cordelia tore her eyes away from a very worried looking Wesley and looked over to the brunette girl.

"Who's 'the whelp'?" Fred asked.  Lorne, Gunn and Wes all looked to Cordelia as well, awaiting her answer.  This time, it was her that felt the gut-wrenching unease.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Angel slammed the door to his apartment.  The house of cards was about to fall, and he knew it.  Right now, he wasn't sure if it was fear he was feeling, or just anger.  When Cordelia had said the name Conner, any joy he had felt at her homecoming had been stripped away from him.  She remembered.  She remembered _everything that had happened, and stuff that she shouldn't have known about.  When he'd heard her voice, when he'd seen her… he was awaiting the new beginning.  He was __hoping for a new beginning with her.  But it was impossible now.  Not with her remembering Conner…  He sat down on his couch and stared out the impossibly large windows.  All he'd wanted was a good life for Conner and for Cordelia to come back.  He had both of those now.  _Why did it still feel like he was standing on the precipice that leads down to Hell? __

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_** A/N2: Okay, so this isn't as long as I would have wanted it, but I needed to get something written before the angry villagers decided to come knock down my door and carry me off to oblivion!  Being that it is the holidays, and I live somewhere that I don't consider home, I will be taking a short long drive to celebrate the holidays with the rest of my family and close friends.  I may or may not have computer access until after the New Year… so, you'll have to be patient again.  But hopefully some time with the pen and paper can get me started on the next part.  So, until the New Year, I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday season and I'll see you in 2004!  Keep on reading and reviewing!  There won't be a greater gift for me when I return than to see a mountain of reviews of people enjoying this story.  Tell me what you like, what you don't like and what you want to see!  I'm open to anything at this point!!  _


	12. Part XII

_**A/N – As was noted before, my review thanks from the last part was outrageously long… so I'm going to keep it really short this time around with the exception of two…_

**_Pixie88_**_ – Oh my!  A crossover review!  I love crossover reviewers!  I'm very excited that you enjoyed 'What If I Can't?' in the __General__Hospital__ realm, and I'm ecstatic that you like this as well!  Please keep on reading and reviewing!  Familiar faces within different genres make me feel like I'm doing my job…:) _

**_ABC_**_ – Yes!  You can find a good story on FF.net!  And I'm not just plugging the site that was kind enough to let me post, I'm being honest.  There are a lot of good writers that go unnoticed and VERY unappreciated…  So keep looking!  You'll find more, trust me!_

_And to everyone else that reviewed, I bow before you!  It was great to see such a wonderful response to my last post.  I appreciate every single review and read through them a couple of times.  In fact, if I've had a hard day, I go back and look at old ones to make me smile.  All of the support and praise makes the effort worthwhile and keeps me writing.  When I get frustrated and have the urge to quit everything I'm writing, it's all of you that keep me from doing such an insane thing.  Thank you and keep it up!!_

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_Stupid Wes!  _Cordelia let out a large sigh as she walked down the hallway towards Angel's apartment.  Wes had made her go 'make good' with the cranky vampire while he and Spike explained some things to Gunn, Lorne and Fred about the vision.  He said that they were going to have to all work together if they were going to figure all of this stuff out and Cordelia and Angel should be on good terms in order for it to all work out correctly.  _Pffft._  Cordelia huffed to herself.  It was a complete Wesley 'duh, speaking of the obvious' moment.  But the more she whined to herself, the more Cordelia realized how much things had changed.  Gunn and Fred weren't together…  Gunn was even a little weird and Fred was still a bit of a lost little girl despite the confidence that seemed to be growing in leaps and bounds. Wes was all serious Watcher-y again… Lorne seemed a little less light-hearted… and Angel… Well, what could she say about Angel that hadn't already been said in the past?  He was certainly broody.  Check.  He was also melodramatic-y.  Check.  Cordelia rolled her eyes.  It was like the man-pire had reverted to his serious, glowering, detached, no-life-in-him-whatsoever mode of old.  Check, check and check.  At least he hadn't gone back to the black on black motif.  A smug smile slipped over Cordelia's features for a second.  She'd been right – he looked good in colors.  And it gave her a little sense of pride to know that she'd been the one to dig him out of that depressing hole.  And out of the blood red, oh-so-Angelus depths.  Cordelia shook her head… _way_ off subject.  The changes the gang went through… it all led back to one thing.  Conner.  It hurt that all of her memories of the little baby – and the young man – had been erased from everyone's minds as if they had meant nothing.  Granted, a lot of those memories were painful and she hadn't even been herself a lot of the time, but they were still there and needing to be worked through.  Especially since some of the actions spawned from everything brought her to this point.

"And this point is staring you right in the face, Cor," she told herself as she came face to face with Angel's apartment door.  With a steady breath, she put her hand on the doorknob and turned.  It was unlocked, surprisingly.  She'd expected Angel to go marinate in his outrage, locked in a dank, dark room where no interloper could possibly interrupt.  But she was no mere interloper.  She was Cordelia – hear her roar, goddamnit!  _Grrrrrr_, she said to herself as she walked further into the dark apartment.    

"Typical vampire," she muttered to herself as she looked around the living room.  It was done in his signature dark on dark.  Dark red walls, black leather and dark wood furniture, weapons decorating the walls and ancient tomes lining the bookshelves.

"Angel, I could have stood outside your door and predicted your décor," she shouted.  Cordelia waited a beat but was greeted with only silence.

"Martha 'the house goddess' Stewart would have a fit," she tried again.

"What are you doing here, Cordelia?" a voice broke out in the dark apartment.  Cordelia inwardly chided herself for jumping slightly at his voice.  Turning towards the source, she put her hands up to her hips in a defensive position.  She knew that he knew she was slightly afraid of being there.  Angel of before, she knew.  This new Angel, the Angel that worked for Wolfram & Hart, she didn't know anymore.  The dark doorway framed an equally dark vampire.  He stood, leaning against the doorjamb watching her.  One of her fine eyebrows arched up.

"I see we've gotten in touch with our inner repressed depression yet again," she said.  Angel stood up straight, an annoyed look crossing his face.

"Cordelia, I'm not in the mood for one of your rants on my choice of furnishings, my choice of clothing or my choice of anything," he said.  Cordelia just looked at him.

"_You're_ not in the mood?  How 'bout me, buster?  I didn't want to give the first one… which you didn't even listen to anyways!  But frankly, your choices as of late have been fairly rant-inducing," she said.  The vampire crossed the room and sat down, picking up one of his numerous dusty tomes and opened it.

"Cordelia, are you just going to stand there and sulk?" he asked, not even looking up.  Cordelia just watched him for a second.  Then she huffed and sat down in the chair across from him.

"You think I'd rather be here, trying to make nice with a perpetually morose creature of the night, than off sitting in some remote tropical location getting my tan lines back and sipping mai-tai's till I see double?" Cordelia asked, crossing her arms and her legs as she stared at the top of Angel's bent head.  "If you think that, then you're mistaken, bub…"  This time, the vampire did look up – his face serious and betraying no emotion.

"Then go, Cordelia… I've never asked you to stay…" he said, his dark eyes locking with her.  The way he said it… the detached, doctor-like tone pissed her off to no end.  But rather than yell, she just stood up.  

"No, you didn't, did you?" she asked softy.  "But I did anyway… and you know why?"  Angel sighed as he closed the book and set it aside.

"Because you believe in the good fight," he said simply.  Cordelia's eyes widened.

"Is that what this is all about?  Is that why you've joined Wolfram & Hart?" she asked more to herself.  Angel let out a little laugh.

"Because I believe in the good fight?" he asked, incredulous.  Cordelia shook her head as she looked closer at him.

"No… because you _don't_," she said back.  Angel watched her, his eyes narrowing at her careful examination.   Uncomfortable, and all of a sudden angry, he stood up.

"Are you asking me if I've given up?" he asked with a frown.  "Because I haven't.  I've been the damned PTB's good little pet vampire… helping those helpless… what more could they – or you, for that matter – ask?"  There was silence.  Angel felt the urge to smash something as the silence stretched out and she continued to watch him.  Finally, she sat forward and leaned her elbows on her knees.

"Have you heard the saying 'sins of the heart', Angel?" she asked, her eyes locked on his.  Angel turned away from her.

"You forget, I don't have one… well, not a working one, anyways," he said.  Cordelia shook her head as she stood up and crossed to him.

"It doesn't matter, Angel," she said as she laid a hand on his arm.  "The issue here isn't whether or not you stopped fighting… or helping the helpless.  What I want to know is when did you stop fighting for the Powers?"  Angel looked down at her hand and then up at her.  There was concern in her gaze, and sadness.  He shook her arm off.

"When the Powers stopped caring what happened… who got caught in the crossfire," he spit out.  Cordelia stood up straight.

"Angel…" she started.  Angel cut her off with an angry glare.

"No!  Don't try to defend them!  I've been nothing less than their loyal servant…" as soon as the words were out of his mouth, he pointed at her when she opened her mouth.  "And you bring up Darla or anything about the color beige and I'll throw you out that window!  I should have known then that there isn't anything better than this.  It was what Wolfram & Hart was trying to tell me…  The fight is endless.  Only the people I love get hurt and…"  Cordelia waited for him to finish, but he didn't.  She let out a heavy sigh when she realized that the angry spout of information had been closed off.  She'd been lucky to get this much out of oh-so-talkative Angel.

"It was Conner, wasn't it?" she asked.  "When Conner came back… nothing was right after that.  I though it was Wes that had caused all the tense stuff… but it was _you_.  You weren't right after that."

"God, Cordelia," he said in a deathly quiet, monotone voice as he rubbed a hand over his face.  Cordelia looked at him in question.

"What?  It's true, isn't it?  It actually explains a lot," she said as she turned away from him to look out the window.  Before she knew it, strong arms gripped hers and turned her around.

"Cordelia, the fact that you think it was just Conner shows that nothing was explained," he said angrily.  Cordelia winced as the grip on her arms tightened slightly.  A spark flashed in her eye as she brought her hands up between them and laid them on his chest.

"You'd better let me go, Broody Boy, or I'm going to…" she started, trailing off as she turned her palms toward her slowly to look at them.  Cordelia felt the new wave of tears bubbling inside of her chest as she looked at her useless non-demon hands.  Angel's grip loosened on her as he watched the anger on her face crumble to despair.  Anger had brought her heated blood to the surface and almost scalded Angel's hands where they touched her.  But the sudden wave of anguish and confusion was like feeling someone pale.

"Cordy?" he asked softly, worried at the look on her face.

"Oh, God," she rasped out, eyes still locked on her hands.  It took her a moment to realize what her brain was telling her, but once she did she let out a soft, painful cry as she collapsed into Angel's embrace.

"It's all my fault," she whispered so quietly that without his vampire hearing Angel wouldn't have heard it.  Concern and panic were warring with each other in Angel's chest as he picked her up and sat down with her on the couch.

"Cordelia… what's your fault?" he asked her, stroking the back of her head.  Cordelia's eyes were unseeing as she leaned and rested her head on his shoulder.

"Oh, God… all of it… if I hadn't been so stupid…" she said.

"Cordelia…" Angel said, but she kept on talking as if he weren't there.

"It was all a test.  I should have said no… I was supposed to say no… but I didn't and I'm being punished for it.  This is my punishment…" she said.  Angel frowned.  What would she be punished for?  He was about to ask, but she kept on talking.

"My punishment is to live through this mess as a human, without the visions, without _anything_ so that I can't do anything about it!  And I can't, can I?  It's impossible for me to fix this now…" she rambled on, bringing a hand to her forehead in weary frustration.  Suddenly, she sat up and gripped Angel's shirt, looking him straight in the eye.

"I can't change this!  I'm here, but I can't change you being here or the rest of the gang being here.  I can't bring Conner back… I can't undo Jasmine…  My selfishness has caused all of this.  I've hurt you, I've hurt Wes, I've hurt Conner… I've hurt everyone.  The damned Powers That Be.  They _knew_ what would happen, but they didn't stop me.  Because I chose to be a higher power, Jasmine was allowed to be free.  If I'd said no, if I'd fought it, I could have come back, found you, healed Conner… but instead I got wrapped up in my usefulness, my own pride…And now, I can't do a thing to change it, or fix it," Cordelia ended on a weak voice.  The grip she had on Angel's shirt loosened and she leaned into him.  Angel was silent as he wrapped his arms around her and held her close.  She was talking about the time when they'd both disappeared, that much he knew.

"You didn't cause anything, Cordelia," he replied softly.  It took a second, but the brunette looked up at him, her eyes watery with unshed tears and her face a picture of confusion.

"How do you know?" she asked.  Suddenly she unwrapped herself from Angel and stood up.  Angry Cordelia was back and she was pacing back and forth in front of him.  He watched as she thought something over.

"What are you doing?" he asked, honestly curious as to what was going through her head.  She waved a hand at him.

"Quiet!  I'm thinking!" she said tartly as she continued to wear a path into his floor.  Angel stood up in her path and grasped her shoulders lightly.

"Cordelia…" he tried again, but she shook free.

"No, Angel.  Don't try to reason things out.  Don't try to make me not feel guilty.  Give us mere mortals a hand hold on some of the brooding vibes, okay?  You can't have a monopoly on 'em all, Scrooge.  I just need to think…" she said, a hand going to her hip and her free hand going up to tap a fingernail against her teeth.  After a moment she clapped her hands together and hopped happily.

"I've got it!" she said.

"Got what?" Angel asked, a confused frown on his face.

"The answer, dummy!" she said as she started her pacing again.  "You did it, so why can't I?  It will be a little bit different, of course, but if I beg enough, they can probably do it.  I mean, the PTB can't be _that_ spiteful… can they?"  Angel frowned again.

"What are you talking about?  What did I do?" he asked.  Cordelia turned to face him.

"You messed with the timeline… you erased Conner from everyone's memories.  Hell, you did it before that with the whole Buffy boinking day…  If the PTB can do that for you, then they can certainly do it for me…" she said.  Angel shook his head.

"No, Cordelia," he said.  Cordelia whirled on him angrily.

"Oh, so you can erase what you want from people, but I can't?  Even when I'm trying to fix things?!  What gives you that right and not me?" she asked.  

"Cordelia, when I erased the day with Buffy, I sacrificed my happiness – being human – to the PTB.  When I erased Conner from everyone's memory, it wasn't through the Powers…" he said.  Cordelia's eyes widened.

"What?" she asked.  "What do you mean 'it wasn't through the Powers'?"  Angel let out an unneeded breath and sat down.

"Wolfram & Hart were the ones that arranged for Conner's new life and for the memory thing," he said.  Cordelia's jaw dropped and she was silent as Angel's words absorbed into her brain.

"Oh my God," she finally moaned.  "Angel!  How could you do that?!  What if… oh God… what if there's something else going on?  What if they didn't really make them forget?  What if they're planning something and you stupidly gave them what they wanted?"  The agitated woman's pace quickened as the worry seeped into her.

"Cordelia, no one remembers.  That's what I wanted, and that's what I got.  I'm happy that Conner has a good life and that his part in everyone's pain isn't remembered," Angel said, looking at the floor.  Cordelia stopped in front of him.

"What about me?" she asked, causing Angel to look up at her.  "And you?"  Angel shook his head.

"It doesn't matter," he said.  Cordelia's eyes narrowed as he looked down again.

"Bullshit 'it doesn't matter'.  You can't even look at me now, can you?  It may not have been me with Conner, but every time you look at the real me, you still see it, don't you?" she asked.

"Cordelia…" he started.

"No Angel!  You get pissed off because I went to someone else first… I went to Wes.  But at the same time you can still see that thing that was masquerading as me and you can barely look at me," she said.

"Cordelia, stop interrupting me!" he said.  "If you'd let me answer you'd know that no, I don't see what happened before when I look at you.  You think it's disgust, Cordy, but it's not.  It's anger and guilt… directed towards _me_ not you.  I should have known that it wasn't you… or at least that something was off.  How could I have thought I loved you and been fooled so easily?" he asked, standing up and going to the window.  Cordelia's heart pounded as all the feelings she had for him rushed to the surface and begged to be shouted out.  But she held firm.  The words 'thought I loved you' was suitable enough cold water on that fire.  It didn't escape her notice that he's crossed the entire room, as far from her as he could get, after he'd said that.

"Fine," Cordelia said softly.  "You want to take blame, go ahead.  Who am I to stop you?  But we were all fooled.  We all made decisions that were wrong and we were all preyed upon…"  Angel turned to look at her.

"What?" he asked.  Cordelia shrugged.

"It's true.  I was preyed upon by both the Powers and by Jasmine through my weaknesses.  Wolfram & Hart found all of yours and exploited them.  You wanted a better life for Conner.  They gave it to you.  Wes wanted some purpose and self-worth – to prove himself.  They gave it to him.  Gunn wanted to be more than just brawn to AI. They gave it to him.  Fred wanted to do what she loved in a setting that befitted her.  They gave it to her.  And Lorne… well, who really knows what Lorne wants in his crazy brain, but what Wolfram & Hart gave him… he's not complaining…" she explained.  "We all let our guard down at the worst possible times.  We should have been more wary, but instead we let the weaknesses become powerful.  And here we all are…"  Angel was silent as he thought over her words.  Finally, he nodded, agreeing with her.

"You're probably right.  But you are wrong about one thing," he said, his brown eyes conveying his seriousness.  "It wasn't just Conner, Cordy.  It was you, too.  They offered to give you the best doctors, the best medical care – the best researchers – to make you better.  I couldn't pass that up either."  This time, Cordelia's eyes went to the ground.  The area where her heart was warmed considerably at his words.  It made her feel a little better – but she knew it was selfish.  And she knew what being selfish had gotten her before.  That thought sobered her quickly.

"Thank you," she said.  Angel looked like he wanted to say more, but didn't know what or how to say it.  And before he could speak up there was a knock on his apartment door.  Angel and Cordelia both looked at each other.

"Are we okay?" she asked him.  It took a second for him to answer, because if he'd answered truthfully, it would have led to more questions.  So he lied instead.

"Yeah."  Cordelia smiled at him before she went to open the door.  When she did, a green head peeked in.

"Hello lovies… Anyone missing extremities?" Lorne's sing-song voice asked, and didn't wait for an answer.  "No?  Good.  Cuz us bunch have had a pow-wow and our resident brain has come up with a theory…"  The green demon led a weary bunch into Angel's apartment, Wesley bringing up the rear.  The Englishman cleared his throat and pushed his glasses up a little.  When he looked to Cordelia, she gave him a reassuring smile… and he returned it.

"Well, as theories go… this one isn't sound… but then again," he said.  "We've gone on less…"

"Damn.  I've heard this already.  Do I really have to stay and listen _again_?  I want to go to bed.  It's gone long past calling my name…" Gunn whined.  Cordelia smiled.

"Maybe we'll come up with something that you haven't heard, Gunn," she said.  The black man rolled his eyes and glared at her.

"You think I care, at this exact moment, whether or not you fools solve world peace while I'm sleeping?" he asked.  Cordelia let out a chuckle.

"You will when we get the prize and the money to go with it," she shot back to him.  He smiled at her.  Wes cleared his throat again, calling attention to himself.

"If you're quite finished," he said.  Cordelia rolled her eyes this time and nodded.  "Good.  Then after extensive amounts of research into both the book and to Spike's vision, I may have come up with a brief, unsubstantiated revelation."  Fred plopped down into a nearby chair as Cordelia leaned against the couch.

"By all means, Wise One… continue," she said.  Wes cleared his throat again as he looked to Cordelia, and then briefly to Angel.

"I believe that in connection to the child in Spike's vision our memories have been tampered with…" he said.  Fred sat up straight in her chair, her eyes wide as Gunn let out an explicative.  Angel and Cordy looked between themselves quickly as Lorne also let out what surely must have been an explicative in his dimension's language.

"Wes man, you said nothing of that sort in our discussion… you told us about ancient Celtic monks, which makes sense since there were robes in the vision.  But memory tampering?" Gunn cried.

"Yeah, baldykins is right.  As theories go, that one is certainly brief and unsubstantiated… not to mention completely out of some crazy weird left field…" Lorne added.  Wes looked around the room until his eyes fell on Cordelia again.  She was watching him with a serious expression – the only one that seemed to be giving his theory any merit.

"Wes… please tell us how you came up with this," she prompted in a calm, collected voice.  It was then that Wes realized she knew more than she had told him.                    

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_A/N – I really hope that you enjoyed this part… I really enjoyed writing it, even though it took me forever.  I hope it explains a little of Cordelia's actions and a little of her reasoning for some things.  If it doesn't let me know and I'll try to expound further somewhere.  Otherwise, I'm sure it raises more questions – and that's the point, since this isn't over yet – so don't be afraid to ask them!!  I love to see what my readers' minds come up with as they go through…_


	13. Part XIII

_ Thanks to everyone who was kind enough to review… it warms my heart that everyone is still sticking with this story… :)_

__

_Author Note of fair warning –  First of all, I'm in the middle of a transition.  This jobless graduate just got a job.  And it's 300-some miles from where I currently reside.  It may take a while for the next post due to lack of computer time and lack of Internet availability (which I hope to remedy ASAP!)… which also leads me to apologize for the long time between this post and the last one.  I'm horrible, aren't I?  I beg for everyone's forgiveness… Whew… okay, second…, so I also got that Pirates of the __Caribbean__ plotline that was driving me insane mostly out of my head, and now I can give this story a go again…  Honestly, I spent all of this time between the last post and now starting ANOTHER story (I know, I know!  I'm nutzoid, you don't need to tell me!)!  And now that it's actually started, I feel a lot better and more creative where everything else is concerned.  Sooooooooo, here we go…_

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"I didn't want to say anything until I had a better grasp on what may be happening," Wes started as he set the text he was holding down onto the coffee table.  Everyone – with the exception of a pacing vampire - had either sat down or inched closer to Wes in order to get the anticipated explanation.

"Well, enough with the suspense, Sherlock.  What may be happening?" Lorne asked.  Wes' eyes caught Cordelia's again before he began.

"I didn't begin to suspect anything concerning memory tampering until after Cordelia had returned.  Little things began to make themselves known - minute things that lay just on the edge of my brain.  I couldn't place my finger on them or anything and I couldn't tell you now what they are.  But I realized, as I tried to think back to certain situations of the past, that I had anomalies in my memories.  Cranial black holes almost.  I remember odd things, snippets that seem to be missing something.  It's like déjà vu - except, of course, it isn't.  And when Spike relayed his vision to me with the child and then with us, it made a little more sense.  There's obviously a connection to us and the child, but I don't know what…" Wesley finished.  There was silence for a few moments.

"You know," Fred finally said softly.  "I think Wes is right.  I feel those black holes too, now that I'm actually working at remembering.  I don't feel right."  Gunn frowned as he searched his own memory.

"Okay - so, when will the memory man be coming back??  Cuz I've got other memories I'd like to forget…" the black man said.  Fred gave him a look.

"Not a time for jokes, Charles," she told him.  Gunn looked around the room to see everyone else looking at him the same way.  He cleared his throat.

"I'm sensing that," he said as he scooted lower in his chair.  Fred pat his thigh before she turned to Lorne.

"This is all fine and good, but what about you?  What's your excuse?" she asked, pointing at the green demon.  Lorne pointed to himself and mouthed 'who me?'.  Fred nodded.  With a roll of his red eyes, Lorne stood up.

"Oh yes, let's pick the most illogical choice of all and blame it all on the green, horned demon. Let's be rational here, folks - and unfolks.  What would little old moi have to gain by erasing memories?  Hmmmm?" he asked.  Fred shook her head.

"That's not what I meant, Lorne.  I'm just sayin' - you're this soul-reading mojo guy.  Why couldn't you tell that something was wrong, or missing?" she asked.  Lorne shrugged.

"My memory must have been tampered with as well, sugarplum.  I only read soul meters, not 'oh my good gosh the world's in grave danger' meters," he said.  There was low laughter coming from the unusually silent ghost.

"Oh come off it.  Leave Jolly Green alone.  You're way off mark, mates…" Spike said as he leaned back in one of Angel's chairs looking bored.  "The only thing you're remotely in the ball park about is that there _is_ a 'who' involved."  Wes turned to Spike.

"What exactly do you know, Spike?" he asked.  Spike just shrugged.

"I know what I need to know, mate.  But then, there are others in this room who know more than they bloody well should," the ghost said, his eyes going to Cordelia, and then to Angel.  It wasn't missed by the rest of the group.

"Yes," Wes said in a drawn out manner as he turned to Angel.  "You have been uncharacteristically silent during all of this deliberation, Angel."  The vampire straightened from where he leaned against his desk.  He paced a few times before stopping and putting his hands on his waist.

"What do you want me to say?" he asked, looking directly at Wes and then to Cordelia.  "That I'm behind all of this?"  Lorne raised his hand as he cleared his throat.

"Actually, big guy, we were hoping for the negatory so we wouldn't have to - you know -" the demon said while making a stabbing motion.  "- stake you -"  There was silence as Angel turned to look at him.  Lorne closed his eyes after a second of seeing the vampire's aura.

"I didn't want to see that, Angelcakes," the green demon said, resigned and disappointed as he sat in a nearby chair.  Fred looked to the demon and then to where Wes stood.  The ex-Watcher also held a disappointed look on his face.

"See what?" she asked missing the significance of Lorne's words.  Wes shifted and stepped closer to the vampire.

"May I be so bold as to inquire as to what, precisely, you tampered with?" the Englishman asked.  Cordelia crossed to where the vampire was standing and stood next to him in support.  Angel looked gratefully to her and she smiled softly in response.  Still, he was silent, not really knowing where to start.

"Why don't you start from the beginning?" Cordelia prompted, laying a hand on Angel's shoulder.  There was a snort from one of the room's occupants.

"A handy place to start, mate. . ." Spike said, causing Cordelia and Angel to both glare at him.  Spike caught Cordelia's eye.

"Right, right.  Play by play and all that hubbub -" he said while making a zipping motion over his lips.  Wes cleared his throat to bring attention back to the matter at hand.

"Angel, at the moment, I'm finding it difficult _not_ jump to conclusions.  It would be safer for us all if you would tell us what happened," he told the vampire.  Angel shifted uncomfortably for a second or two before he finally went and sat behind his desk.  He indulged himself a moment as he put his face in his hands and ran them roughly over his face.  How he was going to begin the story, he had no idea.  The Powers give him strength . . . the thought ran through his head as he watched Gunn pick up a stake and toss it carelessly between his hands.  There was going to be a fight over that simple piece of wood when he got through.  With a heavy swallow, Angel finally looked up to the awaiting faces.

"Fine, I'll tell you what happened . . .  but it isn't pretty, by any means," he said, sitting back in his chair.

"Well, considering what it led you to do - to your _friends_, boyo - I wouldn't have guessed any less," Lorne replied.  With that being said, Angel took an unneeded breath and started the horrific task of catching his friends up to a forgotten reality.

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_Somewhere in __Europe__…_

"Whew. . .  You are one hard lady to track down," a man's voice said from behind her.  Buffy Summers turned her head to watch a good-looking man approach her bench.  She was sitting in a park in downtown Biarritz, France enjoying the sun, a good book, and the time away from her father and sister.  Dawn had badgered their father into going shopping and Buffy had politely declined in favor of alone time.  The blond repressed a shudder at the thought of butchering her already grotesque French skills in conversation with any of the locals.  

"Who are you?" she asked as the man sat down next to her.  A suspicious frown graced the Slayer's delicate features.  The man just smiled.

"You could call me a friend," he said, sitting back and resting his steepled fingers across his midsection.  Buffy propped the sunglasses shielding her eyes from the sun atop her head as she carefully looked him over.

"I know my friends . . . and you aren't one of them," she said.  The man laughed at this.

"Are you so sure?" he asked.  Buffy rose, her book forgotten and her hands fisted.

"I wouldn't get so smart-assy if I were you," she warned.  The man held up his hands.

"Relax, Sport.  I know who you are and all about your - situation," he said.  The frown that had crossed her face earlier was back.

"Oh?  My situation?  And how would you know about something like that?" she asked.  The man smiled.

"Allow me to introduce myself. . .  Lindsey McDonald," he said, holding out a hand to her.  She looked at it and then crossed her hands over her chest.

"Yeah?  And who are you to me?" she asked dryly.  Lindsey chuckled as he dropped his hand.

"Let's just say that I know of a predicament that will soon need your - expertise," he said.

"You know I'm the Slayer," the blond stated more than asked.  Lindsey smiled a small smile.

"I used to work for Wolfram & Hart.  I know more than most," he said.  Buffy shifted her weight to her other foot and apprised him again.

"Wolfram & Hart, hmmmm?  I've heard the name.  Attorneys of the underworld and stuff.  Come to think of it, I think I've heard your name in passing. . .  Weren't you some big, to-do, evil lawyer?" she asked.  Lindsey chuckled again.

"I may have been at one time or another.  But I, like others in this sick, twisted world, am trying to find my atonement," he said.  Buffy snorted disbelievingly.

"Right. . .  I've heard that line before," she said.  Lindsey smirked.

"More than once, I'm told," he said, but he waved a dismissing hand at her angry retort.  "But that's neither here nor there, really.  But along the same vein . . . your boyfriend could end up in some serious trouble.  He could probably end up using a bit of your know-how."  Buffy sucked in a painful breath.

"An - Angel?" she asked.  Lindsey put on a look of mock surprise.

"Oh?  Yes, I forget that you've had a couple under the undead category.  But I suppose you could include both in my previous statement, then -" he said.  Buffy's eyes widened as two and two put themselves together.

"Spike?  Spike's - dead," she said, no inflection in her voice to give whatever feelings the name conjured away.  Lindsey stood up and stood in front of the Slayer.

"Oh, I guess I could say he is - in a literal sense - but I could also say it's open for debate," the ex-lawyer said.  Buffy watched him thoughtfully.

"What exactly are you trying to get at here?" she asked.  "Angel _and_ Spike are in trouble?" she asked, her heart hammering so hard in her chest that she was sure the man in front of her could hear it.

"Well, not at the moment, but there are some circumstances later on that could get quite ugly.  They'll need all the muscle they can get," Lindsey said, still evading the blunt and to-the-point approach.  Buffy held up a hand to stop the man from saying anything more.

"Wait, wait, wait . . . are you telling me that they are in trouble _together_?  As in working together?" she asked, incredulous.  "What alternate dimension are _you_ living in?"  Lindsey laughed slightly.

"At this point, Ms. Summers, they have no choice whatsoever other than to work together - let's call it a convergent battle for divergent purposes…" he said.

"Well, that's vague, don't you think?" she asked.  Lindsey gave her a humorless smile.

"Isn't it always, Ms. Summers?" he asked in a rhetorical sort of way before he started to walk away.

"Hey!" she called after him.  He stopped, but didn't turn around.  "When's this so-called trouble happening?"  The ex-lawyer looked over his shoulder.

"I don't have _all_ the answers," was all he said as he continued walking.  Buffy watched him disappear with narrowed eyes.

"Bullshit . . ." she said suspiciously.  But after the suspicion and wariness melted away, an ache took over her heart.  Spike was alive - or closer to it than he had been for the past few months, according to studly lawyer man.  And he was with _Angel_.  She found her bench again and sat down.  It would be a double whammy to her newly healed psyche to see the two of them again.  But maybe with all the shiny new psyche-ness, she'd finally be able to put a few things behind her. . .  And _that_ would be worth the trip.

"Buffy!" Dawn's voice cried.  The Slayer lifted her head to see her little sister bounding in her direction, their father ambling after her with an amused look on his face.  The smile that crossed Buffy's face was genuine despite the unease that coiled in her gut.

"Dawnie!  Did you buy out France?" she asked.  Dawn laughed.

"I couldn't do that even if I tried!" she answered her sister.  "What have you been doing?"  Buffy just chuckled as she picked up the book she'd discarded and handed it to the willowy girl.  

"Enjoying a good story. . ." she said, fully aware of the irony her words held as she thought of the mysterious lawyer.  Dawn's smile disappeared as she assessed the Slayer.

"Uh oh - you've got that look," she said.  Buffy looked surprised.

"What look?" she asked.  Dawn stepped closer to her sister as their father sat wearily on the bench next to them.

"The look that says there's more going on in your head than enjoying a good story…" the teenager commented.  Buffy smiled.

"Actually . . . there kind of is . . .  ummm . . . listen Dawnie," she started as she took her sister's arm and led them both to the bench Mr. Summers sat on.  "I've got to go back to the States for a little bit to finish some things up."  Dawn frowned.

"We'll be back there in little over a month," she pointed out.  Buffy nodded.

"I know, but this needs to be taken care of as soon as possible.  It shouldn't take too long - but if it does, you and Dad'll just have to meet me back there, okay?" the older girl said.  Buffy hated having to do this.  After everything, the last thing she wanted was to be separated from her sister.  But duty was obviously calling.  And there was no way in Hell she was going to include Dawn in the world-ending mess.  A look to her father told Buffy that he understood and accepted the sudden change of plans more than he ever would have before.  He sat forward and placed a hand on his younger daughter's back.

"I'll get things squared away here in Europe and we'll get heading back to L.A. . . if you have to meet us there, you'll meet us there," he said lightly.  Buffy smiled gratefully.

"Thanks," she said.  Dawn had a slightly hurt look on her face, but nodded as well.

"You'll call me when you get there?  To tell me _everything's_ all right?" she asked, taking Buffy's hand and expressing that she knew what _everything_ really involved.  The Slayer gently squeezed her sister's hand back and stood up.

"You know I will.  Now, I'd better go get packing and calling the airport, and I'm certainly going to need help with my already hopeless attempt at packing," she said grinning at Dawn.  Dawn nodded and the Summers troupe took themselves off.

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_Back at Wolfram & Hart…_

There were equally as many stunned faces as there were those that were not.  Lorne, Fred and Gunn all sat wide-eyed as they processed what Angel had told them.  Cordelia, Angel and Spike all watched their reactions with knowing looks.  Wes was the sole stoic face in the room.  There wasn't much anyone could say at the moment due to the large amount of information that had just been relayed.  And Angel was right when he'd said it wasn't pretty.  Wes ran a hand over his neck where that woman, Justine, had left an unbearable but unknown scar.  The ex-Watcher's eyes went to Cordelia, who was watching him back.  Thankfully, there was no pity in her eyes at the news of his betrayal.  But then, she'd known.  And all of a sudden, the torn, miserable, sobbing young woman that he'd held in his arms made sense.  She'd come to him for understanding, for forgiveness.  And at the time, he'd been unknowingly unable to give it.  Yet, at this point, would he _want_ to give it now?  Wes shook the thought out of his head.  It was a morbid, bitter thought - and he'd like to think himself better than that . . . for himself, for Cordelia, for everyone.  Then, the Englishman cleared his throat.

"This is certainly news," he said in a manner that in any other situation would have been called light.  Gunn, Lorne and Fred all looked at the man incredulously.

"That's all you gotta say, man?" Gunn asked almost angrily as he stood up.  Wes shrugged his shoulders.

"What more should I say, Gunn, since you seem to have my emotions plotted out for me?" he asked.  Gunn frowned and crossed his arms.

"I don't know, man, but I expected a little more than a 'this is certainly news'. . ." Gunn said.  "You've been put in the bad guy shoes, man."  Cordelia stepped forward with her hands raised.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" she cried.  Putting her hands on her hips she glared at Gunn.  "Hold off the firing squad bucko.  This is a lot of news, okay?  Don't go jumping down throats before everyone's had a chance to really think it over."  Gunn glared back at her.

"You knew and you didn't say anything - didn't _do_ a damned thing - you were too busy hiding out!" he said.  Cordelia backed up a step at the anger that floated over her.  Again she held up her hands.

"Excuse me?!" she asked coldly.  "If I remember correctly I was hijacked to another realm, brought back to wreak havoc with an evil being inside of me, gave _birth_ to said evil being, and went to sleepy-time land for however long it was only to come back and find all of you holed up in Evil Central.  I don't recall there being much I _could_ do."  Gunn let out a huff, but remained silent.  He knew that he shouldn't be angry with Wes, or Cordelia - or even Angel, really.  If it'd been someone he loved in a situation like that - if it had been _Alana_ - then he would have altered reality too.  But it would take a bigger man than him to actually say it.  So, instead of saying anything, Gunn just sat down again, his anger spent.  Wes watched the black man struggle with himself and knew that he wasn't the only one.  Instead of dwelling on it now, Wes decided to move the subject along.

"You said that Lindsey knew of Conner. . ." he directed to Angel.  The vampire looked up, his eyes troubled for a second before he focused on the issue.

"Yes.  He does, which I don't understand.  If reality was altered, then no one should know.  Cordy, I can understand.  She wasn't _in_ the reality that was altered.  So her knowing doesn't raise any warning flags.  But Lindsey - that's a different story…" Angel said.  Wes nodded.

"I agree. . ." he said.  Angel looked to Wes, a remorseful look on his face.

"Wes, I. . ." he started, but Wes held up a hand.

"Stop, Angel.  We've got bigger things to worry about than to point fingers and to throw out apologizes.  I realize that we've all made mistakes here… some of them bigger than others, but in this, there doesn't seem to be one of us that's blameless.  If anyone is uncomfortable working with another person in this room then the door is over there.  We don't have time to squabble or to let grudges mar our judgment.  What's done is done and now we have to do our best to fix it," he said.  He didn't meet anyone's eyes as he said it, but when he looked up Wes noticed that everyone else had the same problem.

"I agree with Wesley," Cordelia said, her eyes roaming over ever stitch of the shoes she wore.  After a moment, there were agreeing mumbles from everyone else in the room.

"Well . . . that was bloody fun.  Better than a bleedin' Ali twelve-rounder," Spike said as he stood up.  Angel growled at him.

"Shut up, Spike," he said.  Spike just grinned.

"Why would I do that?  I just love rubbin' the salt into the - oh, bloody hell. . ." he cut off as he put a hand to his forehead.

_The kid, Conner, walking around what looked to be a university.__  People in black attacking him.  Men in robes in front of an altar.  The book  and . . . Buffy?_  When Spike looked up again both Cordelia and Angel were standing directly in front of him.

"What did you see?" Angel asked.  Spike looked between the two, and then back to Wesley.

"We don't have much time. . . we have to get to the kid. . ." he said, his eyes going back to Angel.  "The rest, we'll worry about later. . ."  Gunn and Fred stood from where they were sitting and threw concerned looks at each other.  Lorne also stood up.

"Well, then, kiddies, what are we waiting for?  Places to go… people that we don't know, but should know, to save - expensive silk suits to ruin - I can feel the excitement, can you?" the green demon asked as he straightened said suit.  "And after, we can all come back here and get drunker than skunks - well, most of us can, anyway."  Cordelia smirked sadly.

"By the time the night is over, I'm sure all of us will want to be – if not close to – running for mayor of Boozeville," she said before she went to Angel's wall o' weapons and took down an axe.

"I believe this is your choice of weapon, Gunn…" she said before she threw it to him.  He caught it and looked at it for a second.

"Damn straight," he said.  She then took down another axe for Wes.  She smiled at him quickly before she threw it to him.  There was a crossbow for Fred and a sword for Angel.  Lorne held up his hands when Cordelia looked at him.

"I'm a non-violent demon. . . I carry a song in my heart and happiness on my shoulders… there's nothing in my genetic makeup that says 'sword in hand'. . ." he said.  Cordelia just shook her head with a smile as she tucked the sword under her arm for herself.

"Let's go kick some baddie ass, then," she said before following Angel out, everyone else trailing slightly behind.

"Ahhh…" Lorne muttered.  "The good ol' days - except I wasn't nearly so involved. . ."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_Whadya__ think??_

_Ending note (nothing important, just a simple ramble  from yours truly) - Okay, so I watched the 100th episode after all of the 'Cordy's back' hoopla… I was so excited that there would be a wonderful reunion or a complete closure… I was sorely disappointed on both ends.  The hug, slight conversation and parting kiss by no means satisfied my Cordy-fan-forever heart and my Angel/Cordelia-forever state of mind (they kept avoiding the topic of loving one another!).  Joss should have given her more… a two-parter, **at least**, to close her love for Angel and her relationships with everyone else.  And those 'parting words' to Wes?  Cheeeeeap.  He deserved more too…  Lindsey also deserved a better story line and a better exit.  They brought back so many big names that the plot got short-sighted because of it.  Cordy and Lindsey were the draws to the audience, and that was all, it seems, the writers depended on.  This could have been a milestone in the Angel series if it had been done right.  Now, it's only a pebble.  Some 100th, grrrr, arrrg…  Oh well… As of now, all I can hope is that there will be enough fan 'bring Cordy back' brigades to at least get her a recurring role to keep everyone thinking of her.  I can't think of this as the last time we'll see her.  It would make me cry more than I did in that last scene…  She brought the show back to life and Angel back to his loveable, bumbling idiot self he seems to be around her… the energy that has been sorely missing since she went 'bad' was back for that one shining hour in time.  For that, and only that, I'm thankful…  And despite all of my gripes, it was still a decent show.  Mind you… 'decent'… :P  And the reason I put all of my thoughts here is because the WB official site wouldn't let me post what I thought of the episode due to some technical error on the site.  Riiiiight… ;)  So, thanks for listening…  _


	14. Part XIV

_A/N – I'm baaaaaaack… and I'm trying to cut down on my A/N!  I've read through all my chapters and the A/N I've left… I ramble on so much that I bore myself!  Why hasn't anyone told me to shut up!!  Anyways, sorry for the long delay, I'll try to be better, but with my new job I may only get to write at sporadic moments.  So… here be the warning… :)_

_P.S – This is dedicated to all my loyal reviewers.  Thank you for being such wonderful people and sticking by the story, even with the very infrequent updates!!!  _

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**Part XIV**

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The group arrived at the area that Spike had seen in the vision.  Rather, it was a park outside a library on what seemed to be a small college campus.  There were people coming and going from the old brick building… most looked like students.  As they approached, Angel headed the pack with Spike and Cordelia flanking him on each side.  The rest of the gang followed behind, as usual, weapons concealed the best they could so as not to frighten the blissfully unawares passers-by.

"Okay, Spike… where do we go from here?" Angel asked impatiently as he searched the area for any sign of his son.  Spike looked around as well and didn't spot the object of his vision either.

"Bollocks…" he muttered.  "Am I supposed to bloody well know everything?!"  Angel didn't spare the ghost a glare, but a soft growl was heard.  Gunn leaned closer to Wes and Fred.

"I think I like the visions with Cordy the best," he muttered softly, causing Fred to smile.  Both Angel and Cordelia looked over their shoulders at the man with glares.  Gunn straightened and gave them both apologetic looks.  When the two focused on something else, Gunn bent down closer to Fred again.

"Side note…" he said to her.  "I meant to say that I liked the _non-lethal_ visions with Cordy the best…"  Fred pat the black man on the arm in understanding.

"You _did _forget to mention the 'non-lethal' part, Charles," she said, catching the smile that Cordelia threw back to her.  Gunn, knowing full well the pain the non-demonized version of Cordelia had gone through first hand, stayed silent.  After a second, he piped up.

"Good to have you back, Barbie," he called up to her.  Cordelia didn't turn to face him, but she smiled at the acknowledgement from her friend.  Finally.

"Glad to hear it Gunn.  It's good to be back," she said and then turned her attention to Spike.  "Okay, I'm not seeing Conner.  If he's not here, where is he?"  Spike looked around the grounds and immediately zeroed in on an alley between the library and another building.  He pointed.

"That seems a bit familiar…" he said.  As the group started in that direction, Fred's voice broke out.

"Ummm… guys…" she said.  When Angel and Cordelia turned to her, she pointed.  Line of sight brought the group's attention to a half a dozen of robed figures slipping into the alley.  "I don't think we're going to get there before them…"  Cordelia's eyes widened.

"Well, that's an 'oh shit'…" she commented before she took off after a now-sprinting Angel, everyone else following closely behind her.  Everyone skidded to a halt after entering the alleyway to see Angel taking on the robed figures… Conner himself was being held by three others.  Cordelia had to suck in a breath at all the memories of her pseudo-self hit her when Conner's panicked blue eyes met hers.  Gunn, Fred and Wes all darted ahead of her to lend their assistance, but Cordelia was still rooted in place.  Lorne stepped up to her side and placed an understanding hand on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry sugarplum," he said as he observed along with her.  Cordelia took a calming breath and looked over at the green demon.

"I wasn't singing, Lorne," she told him.  He gave her a sardonic smile.

"No singing needed, sweetums… you're broadcasting loud and clear as a bell…" he said.  Cordelia gave him a quick look before she turned back to the fight.

"No time for aura pleasantries," she said as she lifted her sword.  Lorne held up his hands and backed away from her slightly.

"I know you're not mad at me, peach cheeks," he said.  Cordelia just semi-grunted in response to him before she ran into the ensuing battle.  Lorne shook his head.

"Effective way to cut off a conversation…" he noted, taking a mental memo to rehash the conversation at a better time.  Taking full advantage of the slight pathway opened to him, Lorne ambled his suited form the excruciatingly bright color of sea-foam towards the cowering object of the entire fray.  The demon cleared his throat while straightening the lapel of his expensive (when was he going to learn to stop buying them only to have them ruined in expeditions such as these?) suit, causing the frightened boy to look up at him.  Lorne smiled.

"Come, mes ami… my friend… let's leave this rough stuff far behind us…" he said, extending a hand out for the kid to take.  The fear in Conner's eyes magnified as he stared at the green hand.

"Who… what… are you?" he asked, scrambling back on the hard pavement.  Lorne rolled his eyes.

"I'm a leprechaun from the Ice Capades…" he said.  The kid looked perplexed so Lorne let out a sigh.  "Kid… the fact that I just said the words 'ice' and 'capades' together in the same sentence _and_ that am wearing fluorescent silk proves that I'm not some evil-doer intent on using you for nefarious purposes such as, oh say, ending the world…  Have _some_ faith…"  Conner looked around the now-dwindling group of robed people.  The wary look didn't leave his eyes, but he stood up slowly, watching Lorne as well as the rest of the AI gang finish off the rest of his attackers.  The robed figure that was battling Wes and Fred stepped back and raised his arms in front of him.  There was a sudden flash of green light and Lorne watched in a morbid fascination as the AI crew, with the exception of Cordelia and a ghostly Spike, dropped to the ground.  The same with the kid.  Each was clutching their head, trapped in their own personal agony, as the three remaining robed figures escaped out of the alleyway.  Lorne looked up into the wide eyes of Cordelia.  With a small, clueless shrug, she ran over to Angel.  Spike himself managed to look fairly concerned.  

"Angel!  Angel!" Cordelia cried, trying to penetrate the pain-filled fog that clouded his dark eyes.  When she reached out to touch him, his hand whipped up and gripped her wrist, his eyes went tawny with the ridges of his inner demon taking over his features.  Lorne, seeing the unaware, predatory look in the vampire's face rushed forward and pulled Cordelia from the potentially deadly situation.  Cordelia looked around to see all of her friends struggling with the same unseen attacker.  

"What's happening to them, Lorne?" she asked softly.  Lorne shook his head.

"I don't know, Princess.  What sort of mystical sort of sock 'em would leave you and me out of the fun?" he asked back.  Cordelia's gaze wandered worriedly over her friends.

"I don't know, Lorne… I don't understand," she said as the invisible hold over her friends continued.  Spike huffed.

"What's to understand?  You lot are trouble magnets… that's what…" he said as he stepped over a fallen bad guy to hunch down next to the kid.  "And this poor fop has been dragged into it kickin' and screamin' by the looks of it."  Cordelia tore her gaze from the boy and looked around with an appraising eye.

"They're all kicking and screaming…" she commented softly. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_There was an ache in his head as he watched.  He watched himself scurry out of the Hyperion with a blue bundle in his arms.  He watched as he stealthily made his way to the rendezvous point and waited.  And he watched as the gleaming metal of a razor sharp knife slid silently over the soft, vulnerable skin of his exposed neck.  There was blood everywhere as he watched himself struggle for life.  And then, it was as if he couldn't breathe.  It was then that Wes let himself scream.  It was a scream of rage, pain, fear and betrayal… and why wouldn't it stop?_

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_Why was she back here again?  What person in their right mind would want to come back here again?  Wasn't being a 'cow' for seemingly countless years enough in this lifetime?  Wasn't being treated like a slave, beaten like a slave and almost being beheaded numerous times a once in a lifetime experience?  Yet she still felt the whip marks.  And she still felt the bruises covering her thin, frail body.  And she could feel every kick and every shock from that ungodly collar.  Fred closed her eyes hoping to make the horror go away and never come back.  But it didn't - the fear and the panic becoming a living, breathing entity inside her.  She couldn't make it stop, and she didn't know how to…_

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_Gunn couldn't stop it… it was like a movie stuck in one long, continuous, horrible, miserable loop.  Once it ended, it started all over again.  And each time he felt the pain… each time he felt his heart explode into a storm of dust that rivaled the one he'd caused his sister to become…_ **_Alana_**…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_There were too many moments skipping through his mind.  He couldn't focus on any of them.  He didn't know what he was looking at… but the one thing he did know was the agonizing amount of pain it was causing him.  Images flashed for no more than a second each until it finally stopped on one.  It was the face of a beautiful baby smiling up at him… and then it turned into the fierce, hate-filled face of a teenager.  The pain Angel felt was almost too much to bear.  The lost baby… the child no longer a child.  And the pain that rooted in Angel's head only grew further as that same man-child entwined his form with another well-know, beautiful form – a figure that wasn't who he thought it was, but memory knew no different.  The anger and the anguish coalesced together and ate away at his insides.  All Angel wanted to do was to lash out or curl himself into a ball of apathetic demon.  But as the images continued to reel through his head, he knew that neither would be an option…_

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_It was almost like a near-death experience… or what he would think of as one, anyway.  A life was flashing in front of his eyes… but it wasn't necessarily his.  There was a boy that looked amazingly like him – except not.  His hair was long, his face was dirty, and he wore rags.  And he was angry…  Then came the flash of a man and the warmth of love felt for him.  And then the darkness came as that same man bled onto the indifferent, uncaring cement… two holes in his neck allowing the life to slip from him.  There was no word to describe the torment that overtook Conner's frame.  It was a tornado of love, hate, pain, guilt and vengeance.  The tears slipped out as the pain of an unknown life tore at his mind…_

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

As quickly as it had all started, it stopped.  Cordelia, Spike and Lorne watched, stunned, as their friends simply stopped moving.  Fear crowded Cordelia's throat as she rushed over and panickingly shook the vampire that lay beneath her hands.

"Angel?" she asked hoarsely, her mind telling her that he would be okay.  He was already dead.  But her heart, skipping a mile a minute, was having a harder time following her head's lead.  "Lorne!  Check on Wes!  And Gunn!  See if they're alright!"  Cordelia calmed slightly and immediately ran to Fred without waiting to see if Lorne had followed her hysterical demands.  Using her fingers, Cordelia located a weak pulse on the girl.  A little sob of relief escaped Cordelia as she laid Fred's head in her lap.  A distinctly male groan caught her attention and she turned her gaze to where Lorne was helping a weary Gunn sit up.

"Did anyone get the license plate number of that semi that just ran me over?" he asked.  Cordelia let out a small laugh as she watched a similarly worn Wes and Angel come to.

"What the bloody blazes was that?" Wes asked as he straightened his glasses and attempted to stand up.  Angel's eyes went immediately to Cordelia.  She shook her head in a non-verbal communication that she was alright and hadn't been affected.  

"That, kiddies, was a sign to get the hell outta here," Lorne said as he helped a staggering, confused, wary Conner over to where the group was reconvening.

"I ain't gonna argue about the splitting.  Let's get out of here," Gunn said as he helped a newly conscious Fred to her feet and let her lean into him.  When everyone started to walk away, Conner held back, jerking his arm from Lorne's guiding hand.

"I'm not going anywhere with you!  I was just attacked by psycho monks… and if you think I'm going with you people, you're all nuts," he said holding his hands up and backing away from them.

"Then what do you suggest, Conner?  Those things may come back for you," Wes said.  The boy's eyes widened.

"How do you know who I am?" he asked in a shaky voice.

"Because we're bloody psychics, mate," Spike scoffed before turning to Angel.  "Just clock the nipper.  He'll be easier to handle when his lights are out…"  Conner took another frightened step back as Spike's words registered.  As he contemplated turning and running, Gunn stepped up to him and gripped the kid's upper arm.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you.  Kid, you just don't know what's good for you, do you?" the black man asked as he started walking to where they'd parked the car.  Wes fell into step next to them.

"We're here to help you.  Those people that were after you… they aren't in the least bit pleasant," the ex-Watcher told Conner.  The teenager relaxed slightly and started to walk _with_ Gunn rather than against him.

"Where are you taking me?" he asked.  Angel met Cordelia's eyes as they followed the trio.  He wanted to say 'home' so badly.  But… that would have to wait… for a lot of things.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_Wolfram & Hart complex…_

Conner's eyes were wide in awe as they stepped through the doors into the lobby.  The gang watched him as he spun around to take it all in.  If it weren't the inner circle of Hell itself, it would certainly be an impressive example of modern architecture.

"Well, here we are," Cordelia said as she crossed her arms.  "Home sweet Hell…"  Angel gave her a look before crossing the large room to where his son stood.

"You're bleeding," Angel told him.  Conner frowned.

"No I'm…" Angel gripped the boy's wrist and pushed his shirt sleeve up to reveal a large scraped that was sluggishly bleeding.  Conner's eyes widened as he pulled his arm from the vampire's grasp.  Fred, seeing the usual broody look on her boss' face, went up to Conner.

"Let's… let's go get this cleaned up for you, okay?" she asked, starting to lead the teen away.  Conner, slightly panicked, looked for the only other slightly friendly face in the room.  Cordelia gave him a small smile.

"If she comes at you with a needle, I think you can take her," she commented with a wink.  The joke relaxed the boy and he smiled back.  After the two had left the room, Cordelia spun around to face Angel, hands on her hips.

"Well, you're just flinging out those fluffy 'Daddy' vibes, aren't you?" she asked him.  Angel's brow furrowed more that it already was.

"What are you talking about?" he asked.  Cordelia shook her head as she stepped up to him.  Raising a hand, she used her fingers to physically smooth out the skin between his brows.

"Stop the frowning, Broody," she said fiercely before she took his chin in her hand to make him look at her.  "That… was… your… _son_…  And I believe I'm correct in saying that your permanent scowl is frightening him."  Wes raised a hand from where he'd sat himself.

"I think…" he started, but Cordelia held up a hand to cut him off.

"See, Wesley agrees with me," she said.  Wes frowned, but there was a slight smirk on his face.  Gunn and Lorne exchanged amused glances.  Angel just scowled again and crossed his arms.

"I doubt Wes was going to agree with you Cordy," he said.  Wes sat back in his seat.

"Actually, I was going to agree… but I was going to add that the fact that it's probably a little worse considering he obviously has no clue as to who we are and why those things were after him," the Englishman noted.  Angel rolled his eyes as Cordelia grinned her stellar grin when she turned back to look at him.

"See?" she asked.  Angel stopped frowning, but a tired look crossed his face.

"Cor, I really don't care whether or not I'm frightening Conner right now.  We have other things to worry about… like keeping him _safe_… and figuring out what the hell just happened back in that alleyway," he said.  Wes cleared his throat.

"Yes… I've come up with a theory…" the man started.  Gunn smirked.

"You always have one of those," he said.  The look on Wes' face remained serious.

"Yes, well… taking from what happened to me… I think we were outmatched by our own pain," he said.  Cordelia let out a snort.

"By the way all of you were playing the landed trout with all the flopping around, I'd say 'duh'," she said, crossing her arms impatiently.  Wes turned to her.

"What do you mean by 'all of you'?  You weren't affected?" he asked.  Cordelia shrugged her shoulders.

"Nope… The Chartreuse Sinatra and I were boogie-woogie-free," she said.  Wes then turned to look at Lorne.

"You weren't affected either?" he asked for confirmation.  The green demon shook his head.

"First of all, I'm not chartreuse… I'm a lively spring green… and second of all, you heard the Princess.  We were completely untouched… us and, for obvious reasons, Blondie over there," he answered, pointing to Spike.  Wes thought for a second before he stood and started to pace.

"That changes my theory slightly…  Lorne not being affected, and Spike as well, can be easily explained.  But Cordelia?" he muttered.  Cordelia put her hands on her hips again.

"'But Cordelia' what, buddy?" she asked with a frown.  Wes approached her and put his hands on her shoulders.

"Lorne is a direct link to the Powers That Be.  His mystical ties could have prevented the magic from overtaking him.  And Spike is non-corporeal… whatever spell was cast couldn't possibly affect him.  But you… you're completely…" he explained, only staggering at describing her, unsure of how his words would affect her.

"Human…" Angel finished for him.  Wes gave the vampire a look before focusing on Cordelia again.

"Precisely.  You no longer have any mystical ties to the Powers or any of the demon traits you had before.  There would have been nothing barring you from the magic," he explained.  Cordelia was silent for a second as she processed Wes' words.

"So…" she said finally.  "Where does that leave your theory?"  Wes dropped his hands from her shoulders and began to pace again.

"I still believe we were incapacitated by pain… what I saw was almost like a vision," he said, looking to Angel.  The vampire nodded to convey that he was in agreement.  Wes then looked to Gunn.

"A vision?  I didn't get no vision, Wes-man.  It was a memory.  It was living a horrible memory over and over again," he said.  Wes looked to the ground uncomfortably as he reached up and rubbed his neck.  To his surprise, the once smooth skin contained a raised blemish.  Closing his eyes, he let his hand drop.

"Mine was as well," he said.  "And I'm almost positive that Fred's was as well."

"I heard my name… what's going on down here?" Fred's voice asked as she entered the room.  Angel's eyes widened in concern when he realized that she was unaccompanied.

"Where's Conner?" he asked.  Fred looked to the vampire.

"I figured he probably shouldn't be a part of whatever conversation you are having – for now at least.  So, I left him up in your apartment until I figure out what's going on down here," she told him.

"You left him up there… _alone_?  With all of my books and blood and everything else not even remotely normal?" Angel asked, irritation evident in his voice.  Cordelia stepped closer to him and laid a reassuring hand on his arm.

"Relax, Angel… Conner'll be fine.  What he could possibly learn won't hurt him…" she paused as she remembered how well she'd taken the whole introduction to the world of ghosts, ghoulies and everything grisly.  "… much.  Anyways, whatever he learns could only _help _him with what's coming up.  In fact, we may need to hook him up to our darling Gunn's Speed-Learn-O-Matic so the next time he sees those robed weirdos, he'll know what to do."  Gunn gave a glare in Cordelia's direction, but she was oblivious as she turned to Wes.

"Heard about that, did we, Barbie?" the black man asked.  Cordelia just rolled her eyes.

"But first we need to figure out what they were, right Wes?" she asked her friend.  The man nodded at the question directed to him.

"Yes, we do.  And if you don't mind me prying… it would help to know what each of you saw in your attack," he started.  After a moment, he continued.  "I saw… myself… taking Conner.  My throat was slit and I was dying…"  The group was silent as they realized that Wes had been shown a moment of the repressed reality involving Conner.

"I saw myself staking Alana," Gunn said softly, his eyes downcast as he relived the memory again.

"I was back in Pylea.  My owner was punishing me… it was when my mind started to break," Fred added after a moment of letting Gunn's words be absorbed.

"I saw when Conner was taken and when he came back fro Quor'toth," Angel supplied, leaving the other half of his painful memory out, knowing that it would only upset Cordelia.  Wesley nodded at the explanations.

"It seems they were our most painful memories brought back to incapacitate us.  I still don't understand why Cordel…" Wes started.

"I do…" Cordelia interrupted softly.  The gang turned to her, awaiting her explanation.  "... when those monks flashed their mojo, I had the misfortune – or fortune, depending on how you look at it - to be already thinking of my most painful memory.  So, I'm going out on a limb here to say that I probably debilitated their power against me."  Wes sat back down in his vacated seat and looked to think this explanation over as Lorne appraised the woman giving it.

"It was the kid, wasn't it?" he asked.  Cordelia's dark eyes snapped up to his.

"What?" she asked.  Lorne smiled gently.

"When you saw the kid again… I saw the change in your aura.  It brought everything back… all your *ahem* dealings *ahem* with him, didn't it, sugar pie?" he asked.  Cordelia just crossed her arms.

"If that's the way you see it," she granted.  Lorne just chuckled.

"Oh, I see it," he commented before sobering.  "For what it's worth, I'm sorry."  Cordelia smiled warmly at him.

"It's okay, Lorne.  It isn't your fault.  Hell, it really isn't _my_ fault… well, it is in the grand scheme of things… but it isn't that I saw it all flash in my head when I saw him.  I'll be the first to admit that I attribute bad memories to the familiarity of a face…" Cordelia said, the last part directed solely to the now-frowning Angel.  

"I don't…" he started.  Cordelia, a master in the art of interruption, only held up her hand.

"Just save it, Angel.  You forget that I know you, okay?  I may have been gone a while, and you may have regressed some, but I still know you," she said.  He opened his mouth to say something else, but was suitably silenced as an echoing 'plop' sounded through the spacious lobby.  All eyes went to the object that had been dropped – a simple duffle bag.  Then all eyes went to who had dropped it.

"Well, well, well… imagine my surprise when I went to the hotel and found it empty.  Imagine my bigger surprise when I found out you were all here…" Buffy's voice rang out to where the group stood.  Spike stood up from the side couch where he and Wes sat and gaped at Buffy.  Angel could only stare at the newly-arrived woman.  Silence ensued as Cordelia looked between the two men who's lives seemed to revolve around the petite blond.  Spike looked back to Angel.

"Oh bollocks…" he said, causing everyone to look at him.  "I forgot to mention something…"

"Geez…" Cordelia with an undignified snort.  "… ya think?"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_It's a little short, but at least it's somethin', right?? :P_


	15. Part XV

**_First and foremost, I want to apologize for the long time between updates… I hope I haven't lost any of you because of it!!  I'm in the middle of writing so many things that for a while there, my brain was absolutely fried!  I couldn't stare at my computer for more than 10 minutes a day without going crazy.  But I continued to punch away at this piece a little bit at a time and now… it's posted!  Yay!  So, the long awaited thanks to my reviewers are as follows…_**

_Imzadi__… I never meant to belittle Fred.  I love her too!  There's really no one I DON'T like in the AI gang… with the exception of Groo and Kate (sorry!).  I'm really glad, though, that you liked the chapter!  And yes, there's a little bit of shock there, seeing the Buffster... :P_

_Angellover__…  I would love to submit this to Joss but would he really listen to little ol' me?   And there's only 3 epi's left… 3 epi's where he can seriously redeem himself in my eyes.  I don't want to lose all the faith just yet.  I fell in love with BtVS and Angel for a reason and hopefully Joss will come up with something spectacular for all of us…_

_Diana Troy… Yes, Buffy!!  Should be interesting, right?  And I miss Cordy too.  I watched S3 on DVD and all of her interaction with Angel… he really is a better person with her than he ever was with Buffy.  Cordy made him human… and Buffy could never get past the vampire bit… I'll be very disappointed to see a B/A reunion in the finale…_

_Laina3… I'm really glad I'm satisfying your Cordy requirement… I'm satisfying mine as well.  She (along with Angel) made the show what it was.  Please, keep letting me know how you like it!_

_Genevieve719… Not to sound pompous or anything, but I really liked my Lorne moments too (the chartreuse/lively spring green line was my all-time favorite)!  He's such a great character to write for…_

_LeiLeiLeiko__…  I'm glad you're lovin' it!  I'd be sad if you weren't!  Buffy should add another character dimension to the mix, don't you think? _

_Zidane3…  Thanks for reviewing!  I can only hope that it will be interesting to everyone!_

******************************

"Why, gee, it's Buffy.  Go figure… the world is ending and Lady Lazarus has come to assist us poor little incompetents…" Cordelia said after yet another moment of uncomfortable, confused silence.  After her own words processed in her head, Cordelia winced.  She'd thought herself beyond the high school bitchiness by now, but Buffy Summers always seemed to bring _that_ inner depth to the surface.  The blonde didn't say anything, but she did give the brunette a healthy glare.

"Buffy?" Angel's voice asked, causing Cordelia's heart to do a turn in her chest at the soft tone he used.  She hid it well with a roll of her eyes.  _Same old, same old…_

"Didn't think you'd see me this soon, did you?" Buffy asked, walking up to the dark-haired vampire.  Angel gave her a small smile in return and shook his head.  The welcoming expression on the woman's face slipped off as she thought of something. 

"And you!" the Slayer exclaimed as she turned to Spike and approached him angrily.  "You're dead!  What the hell brought _you_ back?"  Spike actually flinched at her harsh statement and question as he took a step away from her.  Angel stepped forward and extended his hand to Buffy.

"Let's go… talk… about why you're here," he offered, knowing that a war of words could erupt at the drop of a hat between a select few in the spacious room they occupied.  Buffy smiled gratefully as she took the vampire's hand and followed him to the elevators.  The rest of the gang watched in morbid silence as the two once doomed former lovers left.

"Hey… was that she-who's-name-can't-be-said?  The 'B-word'?" Fred asked, causing everyone to look at her.  After a beat, everyone then turned to Cordelia.

"What?" she asked.  "You want my permission to say her name?  Go ahead.  And yes, Fred, that was _Buffy_…"

"Oh… good…" Fred said.  Then she turned to Gunn.  "She didn't look like the Slayer… I expected her to be taller… and, well, you know…"  With that, Fred flexed her spindly arms to imitate muscles.

"You, being you, should know that sometimes good things come in small packages… plus she's got that mystical bibbity-bobbity-boo stuff workin' for her," Gunn said.  Wes cleared his throat in order to draw the black man's attention to Cordelia, who'd turned away from the uncomfortable conversation about subject matter that really didn't concern her.  Gunn, taking the hint, took Fred's arm, knowing the girl wanted to continue the conversation.

"Didn't you say you had something you wanted to check out?" Gunn asked the scientist.  Fred nodded emphatically as she started towards the elevators.  Lorne held up his hand.

"I think I'll join you two.  I want to check on the not-so-little-nipper anyways.  Make sure he's not trying to decapitate things that shouldn't be decapitated.  Not everyone can just lose their head like me and come out looking as marvelous…" he said with a slightly forced chuckle before scurrying after Fred and Gunn.  When they were alone, Wesley turned to Cordelia.

"Are you alright?" he asked softly, approaching the brunette.  Cordelia turned to face Wes, face dry and arms crossed in Cordy fashion, but she couldn't hide the hurt completely.

"I'm fine, Wes…  It's just that seeing Buffy brings back the suppressed Scooby days.  Not a path down memory lane that's full of sunshine and daffodils…" she said with a sigh.  Wes smiled as he put a companionable arm around her shoulders.

"Well then… to take your mind off the past why don't we go to my office, I'll brew us a piping hot pot of tea and we'll start cracking on that decoding that book," he suggested.  Cordelia let out a little laugh as she wrapped one of her arms around his waist.  It was an atypical position for them as they walked to the elevators, but the months of not seeing each other made every little thing seem more important… their friendship being one of them.

"You know, Wes, with all the soda-guzzling, coffee-gulping and blood-sucking co-workers we have and for the amount of time we've all spent together, you'd think that you'd be broken of that disgusting tea habit," Cordelia told him with a teasing look.  Wes chuckled.

"Disgusting habit?!  You want to discuss disgusting habits?  Then we really need to talk about…" he was saying as the elevator doors dinged closed behind them, leaving one silent, confused looking ghost in the empty lobby. 

"Well… I'm left all by my lonesome.  Do they think that just because I'm a sodding ghost that I don't have bloody feelings?  Do those sops really think that they can… oh bloody hell…  I'm talking to myself," Spike grumbled as he headed for the elevators everyone seemed so keen on escaping to.  "If this is the way they think things are going to be run, then they're bloody well mistaken…"  

******************************

"Why did you come here, Buffy?" Angel asked as soon as the door to his office closed behind the blond girl.  Buffy's eyes met his when she looked up at him from where stood.

"I was told there's going to be yet another Armageddon of sorts.  Couldn't miss that, now could I?  Since I seem to be a season ticket holder for all this crap, I couldn't possibly sit at home and watch on TV like all the normal people, right?"  Angel let out a weary breath as he made his way behind his desk.

"We never asked you to come, Buffy.  We can handle this," he said.  Buffy was slightly taken aback at his statement.

"That wasn't the tune you were singing in Sunnydale," she reminded him.  "If I remember correctly, _you_ were all with the team-iness… wanting to join forces and all…"  Angel nodded once.

"I know that, Buffy.  And don't think I don't appreciate your offer but…" he started.

"You have no clue what's going on, do you?" Buffy interrupted.  Angel was silent for a moment as he contemplated his answer.  How much did he really want to tell her?  How much _could_ he tell her?  They still didn't know… well… _a lot_…

"Not really," he finally admitted.  The Slayer crossed her arms and gave the vampire a look.

"See?  My help could be needed.  We all know that extra muscle is always a good thing," she said.

"Buffy… now may not be the best time for you to be here," Angel tried to explain, but knew he was doing a poor job of it.  "The team… well, they have… issues… with things.  We're all trying to figure out what's going on and we're still trying to work together on it."  Buffy let out a huff.

"Issues?  The bald guy defines the word 'issues', Wes doesn't know how to live without 'em, the skinny girl doesn't look old enough to have issues, the green guy's got to have _some_, Spike… he _is_ an issue… and Cordelia?  She can't live without _causing_ plenty of 'em.  So I don't really think having 'issues' is going to be a problem here.  I've been surrounded by them my entire life.  A few more aren't going to hurt," the Slayer said.  Angel sat down in his desk chair.

"Buffy… what we're trying to stop from happening leads back to a boy named Conner," Angel said with difficulty.  Buffy didn't look impressed by the name.

"Okay… kid named Conner.  Yeah?" she asked.  Angel took a hard swallow.

"He's… my son, Buffy," the vampire said.  The Slayer's jaw dropped open.

"Your… _son_?" she asked incredulously.  Then she frowned in thought.  "But you're a vampire… you can't have children…"  Angel let out a breath.

"You don't think I know that, Buffy?  I'm very well aware of all my limitations," he said bitterly before adding a thought in his head.  _More so when you're here…_  Buffy was silent again as she paced in front of Angel's desk.

"You have a son… a son that you shouldn't have… and you didn't feel the need to share that information with me?" she asked, turning to give the vampire a hard look.

"Buffy, Conner and his… situation… didn't involve you, okay?" Angel pleaded with the girl.

"Didn't involve me?" she asked.  "Angel… I thought we were friends…"  The look on her face said so much more and conveyed that there was more to what she thought.

"Up until a few hours ago, Cordelia was the only one to know that I even _had_ a son, so why would I have involved you?" he asked.  Buffy's eyes went wide.

"I can understand not telling anyone… but _Cordelia_?" she asked, astonished.  Angel's dark eyes stayed on hers, but he didn't say anything knowing full well that he didn't have to explain Cordelia's central role in his life to her.  Knowing that the vampire wasn't going to say anything else, Buffy turned on her heel and stormed out of the room.  Angel could only continue to stare at the spot where she had stood.  Then, with a heavy sigh he turned in his chair to look out at the Los Angeles night.

"The thing is, Buffy… we were never really friends…" he muttered to himself as he rubbed a hand over his face and let his thoughts wander back to a fiery brunette.

******************************

_Elsewhere in L.A…_

"The child has no memory of the father…  And the hunters have no memory of the child.  A deal was made and it was fulfilled.  Now is the time to strike, for all is forgotten.  The blood shall be spilled and what's mighty shall reign," a voice said its form levitated over the cold cement.  The vampire standing before it shifted uncomfortably, impatient.

"The first attempt at retrieving the child has failed.  We must attack again tonight, when they least expect it…" the vampire said.  A hand was held up to stop any further suggestion.

"Silence, vampire.  The time will be at hand… but it is not now.  It has been commanded that we acquire the child and the text.  The hunters' strength is in their knowledge and their knowledge is contained in the two.  Yet, at the moment, all we require is a catalyst…" the voice said as its feet slowly came back to the earth.  The vampire waited patiently for his new instructions.

"See to it we have what we need," the voice commanded.  The vampire nodded and bowed quickly.

"As you insist, Master," the vampire said before turning and running off to fulfill the command.  Shrewd, thoughtful eyes watched, unknown, from the shadows as things began to unfold.  

******************************

"You want to know a disgusting habit, mates?" Spike asked as he finally caught up with Wes and Cordelia outside of Wes's office.  "Leaving me behind, that's what!  I'm the freakin' visions, you mincing wankers!"  Cordelia looked over to the ghost with a grin.

"Awwww, we love you too, Spike…" she said sweetly.  Spike frowned at her and stumbled to find something scathing to say back, but instead he just shook his head.

"That won't _always_ work, you know," he commented.  Cordelia shot him another look.

"I'll keep that in mind," she said with a small laugh.  The three were about to make their way into Wes' office when a door slammed open and a blond whirlwind escaped Angel's office.  The look on her face was not a pleasant one.  Cordelia looked to Wes with bemused curiosity.

"Well, that must have been a short conversation," she said.  Buffy stopped in front of the brunette after overhearing her comment.

"Cordelia, if you want to make it through this apocalypse with the least amount of bruises you could come out with, I'd watch what you say.  And if that's too difficult for you, then maybe you should just stay out of my way," the Slayer said, the hurt she felt and the feeling of being unwanted coming out in a verbally brutal manner.

"Well, gee, who blew a black cloud on _your_ sunshiny day?" Cordelia commented as Buffy started to walk by them again.  The Slayer stopped at the question and turned to glare at the brunette.

"You know, Cordelia… the fact that these people put up with you and that you are still here amazes me to no end.  In Sunnydale all you were was a whiny, manipulative, useless bitch," the Slayer said.  Cordelia crossed her arms.

"Hey, I was a damned good bait girl, okay?" she said with a roll of her eyes, trying to not let the girl's words affect her.  Buffy smirked.

"Because that's all you were good for," she said.  Cordelia straightened up, but didn't say anything.  Wes laid a hand on Cordelia's shoulder, knowing her sensitivity towards her purpose, but the girl shrugged it off.

"Well, then.  I've certainly been put in _my_ place, haven't I?" she said with a quick look at both Spike and Wesley.  With that, Cordelia spun on her heel and walked away.  Wesley, more concerned than he was moments before, called to her.

"Cordy… where…" he started.

"I'm going to see how Fred and Gunn are doing on the research party," she explained to him without turning around.  Spike, Buffy and Wes were uncomfortably silent as they looked at everything but each other.  Finally, Wes stood up straight and gave the two a small smile.

"Well… I'm going to go see how our boss is doing.  I have some things to discuss with him," the Englishman excused himself, leaving Spike and Buffy to stare at each other.

"Well," Spike said finally.  "I guess that leaves just me to do the Welcome Wagon bit…"

"Shut up, Spike," Buffy said.  The ghost grinned.

"Good to see you've missed me," he said cheekily.  "And good to see you coming to help.  I think this may end up more difficult than they all realize." 

"What do you know about any of this, Spike?  Angel explained some things to me and the rest I can gather on my own.  You're dead," Buffy bit out.  Spike, for his part, didn't look fazed at all.  Instead of dwell on the stab that hit his heart, the ghost shrugged.

"Oh, so you just noticed, did you?  Well…" he started with a clap.  "… bully for you.  Good to know you _can _see past those Buffy glasses.  And in case you missed it, I'm dead because I saved the bloody world.  I'd think a little thanks are in order from you, but I won't hold my non-existent breath… I wouldn't even if I did have any."  Buffy crossed her arms.

"I did thank you," she said.  Spike's eyebrow rose.

"Oh?  Did you think that fake 'I love you' was going to work on me, luv?  I'm a smarter bloke than you give credit for.  I know you didn't say it because you meant it… I told you as such."  Buffy didn't confirm nor deny.  Instead, her eyes fell to the floor.

"Spike…" she said, her voice softening.  The ghost held up his hands.

"Don't worry, Slayer.  I get it.  Big, bad grandpap gave you the big, bad brushoff.  And now the world of Buffy has been spun all willy-nilly.  But it's time to face the music, luv.  You are not the center of Nancy-boy's world… and in case it's slipped by your oh-so-very-observant self, he's gone on the cheerleader," Spike said, crossing his arms and watching the expressions sure to play on her face.  He wasn't disappointed when the girl's eyes went wide.

"Cordelia?" she asked.  Spike smirked.

"Something wrong with that, luv?" he taunted slightly.

"He's moved on?  To Cordelia?" she asked again.  Spike shook his head sadly.

"You know, luv… it's been four bloody years.  Most people move on twice in that amount of time.  Hell, you have… if I remember correctly.  And as the school of hard knocks has taught me, love isn't always forever.  No matter how star-crossed and tragic," the ghost said, his mind drifting momentarily back to a willowy, erratic brunette.

"We were not star-crossed and tragic," Buffy broke in to his reverie.  The ghost let out a disbelieving chuckle.

"Oh?  Then what else would you call it?  The Slayer and the Vampire… sworn enemies since the dawn of time…" Spike said in a cheesy narrator voice.  Buffy frowned.

"We were the meaning of true love," she said, her shoulders dropping at Spike lifting his brow.  "… with an ironic sense of timing and an obvious sadistic streak…"

"Well, gee, I've had the definition of love wrong all these years… I thought it was supposed to be happy and fulfilling… not ironic and cruel…" Spike said.  Buffy turned away from the ghost, her arms hugging herself.

"Your sarcasm is starting to sound a lot like Cordelia," the Slayer noted.  Spike grinned.

"Well, that girl and I were cut from the same stone, I think.  She has a biting wit that rivals my own… we've been getting along famously," the blond man said.

"When we blew Sunnydale into a crater we must have blown everyone into an alternate universe where everyone loves Cordelia…" Buffy said.  Spike stepped around the petite girl causing her to look up at him.

"Cordelia has been by Angel's side for four long years, Buffy.  She's lost friends with him, she's been through Angelus with him, she's received deadly visions for him, she's been in three debilitating comas for him… and she's come back from near death to be with him.  Now… I'm just a former vampire who's known mainly for his sharp good looks, biting humor and stone-cold emotions… but even _I_ couldn't _not_ love that," he told her.  "The girl you knew in high school has changed into someone you don't know anymore.  And the vampire you loved in high school has done the very same thing.  But then… so have you…"  Buffy clenched and unclenched her hands… and found herself doing something that she never thought she would.  Listening to Spike.  _Really_ listening to him.  And what he said, strangely, made more sense than anything she'd ever told herself in the past.

"Why are you doing this, Spike?" she asked softly.  Blue-green eyes sliding up to finally meet his.  He smiled once, but it slid off his face as quickly as it had appeared.

"You know why," was all he said.  Buffy nodded and looked to the floor again.  After a moment, she started walking.

"I need to be alone," she told him for no reason that she could think of.  Spike watched, hands clenched in the pockets of his duster, as she turned the corner and disappeared from his sight.  He let out a deep breath before his trademark cynical look sunk his cheekbones and he rolled his eyes.

"Well… enough with the bloody Anne Landers bit… I wish I could beat something…" he said as he turned and walked the opposite way.  "… or have a smoke…"

******************************

_A/N… Okay, so that's the part for now.  I have another one half-way finished and it should be up in the next couple of days, God willing *crosses fingers*.  I wanted to get some B/S action going for all those craving angsty-romance at this moment.  We'll see some Cordy/Angel sometime soon… my muse is torturing not only you readers, but me as well.  I'm anxious to get to the good stuff as well (not that Spuffy isn't good stuff, by any means)!!  _

_I'll be kind enough to give a heads-up of the next part so you know what to look forward to:   Lindsey making a re-appearance, Conner getting involved more, a Wes/Angel showdown of sorts, Buffy/Cordy confrontation of sorts, and hopefully a lot of action… Good muse *pats head* goooooood muse…  Shhhh, don't scare it away!!!  _


	16. Part XVI

**_A/N – Over the past week, I've been out of town for four days, and have also suffered the indignity of the mother of all migraine headaches… so forgive me for the delayed post! But you shouldn't be too upset… it is longer than any other post I've had!!! So enjoy it while it lasts!_**

_Trinity S… I'm glad that you took the time to take a look at my story, and I'm happy you think it's okay. I hope you continue to read it… As for the Cordy/Buffy comparison, I know what you are talking about. Yet, I still feel that Cordy, despite her initial reaction and dealings with everything demon-like, accepts Angel for who, what and how he is more so than Buffy ever did. Buffy and Angel had a torturous love and Buffy's dealings with Angel's vampire side (even in the beginning before Angelus) always seemed a little forced to me – which is totally understandable considering she's the Slayer. Cordy and Angel had moved on to that 'loving the good and the bad' part of their relationship which would have made them a super couple to rival the tragic affair that was Angel/Buffy. Sadly, Angel and Buffy never got to that point and I don't think they ever will… especially since they've been apart for 4 years and have grown past each other. But that's just my own honest opinion. I don't try to get people to subscribe to my point of view... so I welcome your disagreement! :) Thanks for the review!_

_Diana Troy… Whoohoo! I'm glad you liked it! This part was originally a combination of the part I posted before and this part. But it was getting long and I was getting VERY anxious to post, as I'm sure all my readers were as well. As for the C/B moments, Cordelia and Buffy have both matured (sort of) past their HS selves. Rather than respond, I felt Cordy needed to walk away so that Spike's speech would have a little more impact. And Buffy is only acting out of hurt. You'll see a better Buffy coming up. Let me know how you like it!_

_Genevieve719… My yes, it's been a while. So sorry to leave everyone in the lurch like that! As I said before, I was just brain dead for a long time there. My Angel muse had taken a vacation and not included me. Thank you for the kind words… and I really liked the Spike defense as well. I hope ya like this part… :)_

_Queen C… Welcome to Purgatory! I hope you've enjoyed your stay so far! And please let me know if there's anything I can do to make your stay even more pleasant! Thank you for the review & I look forward to seeing more! I'm glad you like the story… :)_

_Kool-gyrl__… I'm really glad you seem to be enjoying it! I hope you keep reading!_

_Toasterlicious__… What a name! Love it! And I'm glad you like this! I can't wait to write what happens next!_

_Anne… You know what? I make myself miss Cordy as well. She was so great. And yes… there is definitely more A/C to come. I can't live without 'em… _

O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O

"Angel?" Wes inquired as he stepped into the vampire's office. There was no answer as the chair Angel sat it didn't turn to face the newly arrived man. Wes entered the room completely and closed the door behind him.

"I take it things didn't go well with Buffy?" he ventured. There was a short chuckled from the vampire.

"I don't think we had a long enough conversation to rate it," Angel said as he finally turned to look at Wesley. The Englishman nodded in understanding as he approached the desk and took a seat in one of the empty chairs.

"I see," he said. "Well… then I suppose I should tell you that Buffy went on a slight war-path as she exited your office. Cordelia being the focal point of her anger, as nature would course it." Angel let out a sigh.

"Well, that should accomplish pissing Cordy off more… enough where she'll ultimately blame me for it," he said.

"You two seemed to be on the mend since the whole issue with… Conner," Wes noted, a slight waver to his voice at the mention of the boy. "But I'm afraid you've most likely taken a few steps back in her regard since Buffy's arrival. May I suggest you talk to her?"

"How am I supposed to do that, Wes? Cordelia won't even look at me… not really…" the vampire said, frustration evident in his voice. Wes nodded once.

"I can understand your hesitancy to press the issue, since it is one of Cordy's tender spots," Wesley started, but Angel held up his hand.

"Listen, Wes, I'd rather not talk about Cordy right now. And since you're here, I know you've got something on your mind. What is it?" Angel asked wearily. Wes let out a sigh of his own.

"Well, part was about Cordy. But since we're not discussing her… then I'd like to discuss Conner," the ex-watcher said. Angel's eyes snapped to look at him.

"We don't know anything about what's going on with Conner," Angel said, a slight edge of panic raising his voice slightly. Wes took off his glasses to rub an imaginary spot off of them as he cleared his throat. It was a nervous tic that his mentor, Rupert Giles, usually succumbed to when he was uncomfortable.

"Yes… well, that's not what I wish to discuss," Wes said finally as he placed his glasses back on. "That is Conner of now… I want to talk about Conner of the past…" Angel's eyes went to the scar that was now prominent on the man's neck.

"Wes, we don't need to…" Angel started.

"Yes, Angel. We do," Wes interrupted. "I never could understand it, you see. The nonchalance… and the often-times veiled anger directed towards me. But now… now that I've seen everything, I don't understand why you've only tried to kill me once."

"Wesley…" Angel started, but Wes didn't hear him. His blue eyes were unfocused and seeing the past in his mind.

"It was the ultimate betrayal. I took your son – gave him to the enemy. And to compound that sin, I secreted away all the information I uncovered about him thinking I could undo the prophecy on my own," Wes said. Angel stood and paced behind his desk.

"Wes… I may not understand your reasoning behind not telling us. But after all the time I've had this to myself, I've come to understand why you took Conner. You were looking out for him," Angel conceded. Wes finally looked up at Angel.

"After everything we've all been through, Angel, I should have known that one of us working on our own is not nearly as competent as us working as a team. We learned that with Gunn and his gang, we learned that through you and your…" Wes started.

"Don't mention anything that has to do with a color, Wes. I'm warning you…" Angel growled. Wesley let a small smile form on his face.

"Your… _experience_…" he continued. Then, he sobered completely again. "The past has taught us that we never do well on our own. We do extraordinary things as a team, but as a single entity, we've done more than our share of harm. And there has been one person that has always loyally hit that point home…" Angel was silent for a second.

"We're not talking about her, Wes," he said after a moment. Wes didn't say anything as he thought over his words, his frustration.

"That's what we agreed, but I'm going to have to disagree now. As I think over everything, this is something we can't afford _not_ to talk about. We almost lost her again, Angel. And we didn't fight for her. We were lucky that we got this second chance. It should be our wake up call. We can't afford to not fight for her again… for _anyone_ again. All of us failed Cordelia before… but you most of all. Don't you see? After she returned to us, we all should have known. I chastised you after your epiphany for not knowing Cordelia all the while saying I did – but to be honest, you knew her more than we all like to think we did. We all let her slip through our fingers, never really knowing that we were losing her. We are all unexcused from that failing… but _you_… you loved her. Or at least you gave the impression that you did," Wes said forcefully. Angel slapped his hands down on his desk.

"I did love her! I _still do_ love her, Wesley!" he said, his tone bordering on a yell. Wes stood as well, a fierce look on his face.

"Then don't you think it's time to fight for her again? But then, you never really fought for her, did you? Once you acknowledged your feelings, you stopped fighting for her… oh, it's all quite clear now… the Groosalug, Conner, Jasmine, the Powers… They all took a part of her and you _let_ them. It's funny how, before, no one could get away with touching her… even just looking at her without you turning vicious. But then it seems you couldn't care less… No wonder why Cordelia never _really_ believed in or trusted your feelings. She had faith in you, yes. Blind faith, in fact, in your inherent goodness. But you know how it's said… blind faith leads the lamb to slaughter. That's exactly what happened to her. And it's about time you…" Wes was cut off by the opening of the office door.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Lorne called, holding up his hands in defense of himself as the two angry men spun around to look at him. "Whatever it is, I'm not a part of it… I'm just here to impart that Fred and Gunn may have found something you both should probably see. And can I say in passing mention that the vibes in here are downright nuclear? May I suggest toning down the potential atom bomb a bit?" Angel growled, sending a slight shiver through the green demon, but after a second the vampire calmed himself and stood up straight.

"What did they find, Lorne?" he asked. Lorne assessed the vampire's mood, and somewhat reassured by the not quite red, not yet white aura, he cleared his throat.

"Well… going off of the English stud-muffin's earlier transcribings, we may have found the link between our new text and the… oh… Nyazian scrolls…" the demon said with a bit of unease. Angel looked slightly confused in thought, but Wesley's mind came back to one thing.

"Conner…" he said. Lorne pointed a finger at the man.

"Right-o amigo… Fred said something about a Destroyer…" he said, causing both Wes and Angel to look at each other.

"Well, gee… isn't that just terrific? Now we have two ancient texts that talk of Conner being the Destroyer. I'm sensing not-so-good things to come," Cordelia said from the doorway. All eyes turned to her as she stood next to Gunn and Fred. Wes cleared his throat uncomfortably, the old but still slightly unfamiliar memories sitting uneasily with him.

"Yes, well… we'll have to do everything in our power to make sure that whatever deals with Conner never comes to pass," the Englishman said, emphasizing the 'our' as his eyes found something intriguing on the carpet. Cordelia crossed the room to where Wes sat and placed a supportive hand on his shoulder.

"What else have you two found?" Angel asked Fred and Gunn. Fred crossed the room as well and handed a book she was holding to Wesley.

"Well," the small Texan started as she pointed to a passage. "This part here says something about the human vessel of two vampires… that's about as far as we could get translated without our heads exploding. I still don't remember everything from… before… but I remember the baby. And I know enough that this passage is referencing him. Right?" The uncertainty on the girl's face mirrored everyone's thoughts. Well, everyone except for one.

"The gang's all here…" a voice interrupted everyone's musings from the door. "It seems that you've taken my reading suggestions to heart. It kinda makes me feel like one of the gang… I think I'm getting a little teary-eyed…" Angel stood up straight and crossed his arms.

"What are you doing here, Lindsey?" he asked. Cordelia looked shocked at the new arrival.

"That's what _I'd_ like to know," she said, crossing her own arms. Lindsey smirked as he gave Cordelia a once over.

"Back in the flesh, I see. Stellar choice. And it was good to see the Powers step in for you, for once. If they hadn't… the Senior Partners would have. And it wouldn't have been pretty," the ex-lawyer said. Cordelia approached the man with a frown on her face. She stopped a few feet away from him.

"Are you saying that it was the Powers that took my body before I woke up?" she asked. Lindsey gave her an actual smile.

"Couldn't have evil wreaking havoc on our pretty, young, ex-Seer, now could we?" he asked, with a quick glance around the room at the four very uncomfortable forms.

"Why would the Senior Partners want to have anything to do with me?" Cordelia asked. Lindsey smiled again as he sat himself in one of Angel's less-than-comfortable office chairs.

"Let's just say distraction is the key right now, okay? The Senior Partners have had a hand in things since the beginning. And right now… I get some sort of maniacal glee from telling all of you that you've been their little puppets from the get-go of this little End of Days plot. Kinda makes me want to break out into song…" the ex-lawyer said as he sat back, smugly, in the chair.

"You'll get no complaints from this end of the room, my sweet-voiced sugar muffin. Your voice is the gift that keeps on giving," Lorne's voice broke in. "But… we don't have time for that right now. What we may have here, folks, is a situation that warrants monitoring… and possibly, dare I say, a bit of research?" The green demon pointed to the very busy doorway to where Conner and Spike stood – the kid sending out aura waves equivalent to a tsunami.

"What are you talking about, Lorne?" Fred asked. Lorne gave the girl a wavering smile.

"What I'm saying, Fredikins, is that the earlier attack may not have accomplished exactly what they wanted… but it may have come close… They may not have gotten Conner, but they may have gotten something else they wanted," the green demon said evasively, trying not to give the whole pie away. What he read from the nipper wasn't his to tell.

"Spit it out, Lorne. What's have you read? What have they got?" Angel asked, impatient at the demon's long-winded answers. Lorne rolled his eyes as he pointed to the boy.

"Go ahead, kiddo. Time to spill the beans for all the non-destiny readers…" he told him. The young man looked one part shocked and two parts uncomfortable as he tugged nervously at the cuffs of his shirt. He looked back at Lorne, who waved his hands for him to continue.

"Well… when those… things… jumped me, they stuck something in my side. It wasn't a needle. It was something larger than a needle, but not like a knife or anything… I don't know why they did it. It wasn't to kill me. It wasn't even to hurt me. And I can't tell you what it did to me either, except leave a painful hole in me," he said before lifting his shirt to show everyone the small, quarter-sized hole that looked to be healing quicker than normal on the side of his abdomen. Fred knelt down slightly to get a closer look at the wound.

"Why didn't you say anything? I could have bandaged it for you," she said. Conner let his shirt drop as he looked around the room.

"It was worse before we came here. It's stopped bleeding and it seems like it's going away," he told them. Something the boy said caused Wes to stand up quickly and run out of the office, much to the confusion of his colleagues. He then ran back into the room, carrying the scroll and placed it on Angel's desk. He then grabbed the text that Fred had given to him and placed it next to the scroll. His fingers ran over the phrase that the scientist had pointed out earlier to him, and then seemed to cross reference it to something in the scroll. Everyone stayed silent, waiting for a cue from the Englishman as to what was going on. Lorne suddenly cleared his throat.

"Am I sensing a silent 'Eureka' here, my strudel? Because if I am, I won't hesitate in saying that it will be much more fun if you share with the rest of the class," the demon said. Wes muttered to himself for a second, trying words out on his tongue. And after a few more seconds, he stood up straight, his finger on a word he'd found.

"The word in this text… 'foleolfor'… I believe it to be a combined word of the ancient languages. 'Fola' in Celtic means blood. 'Heolfor' in Anglo-Saxon means blood as well. So, from the loose translation, 'foleolfor' would mean blood as well. And it makes sense, since the Celtic words 'taghaim' and 'taidhbhse' are used in conjunction. One means 'calling of the dead' and the other means 'spirit of the dead'. So… I'm going on a limb here to say that blood is needed to call upon some form of evil," Wes said as he searched out more words on the scroll that could shed light upon the mystery at hand, his glance occasionally falling on the teenager in front of him. The sound of clapping caused everyone to turn. Lindsey sat, lounging in Angel's chair as he continued to applaud them.

"By George, I think you've got it," he said. "You're on the right track, boys and girls… demons and vampires…" Angel glared at the man.

"Lindsey, if you know what's going on, why don't you save yourself the eventual pain and tell us," he said. Lindsey smirked.

"Now why would I do that? I hate you guys…" he stated simply as he stood up. "By all rights, I shouldn't even be here imparting my wisdom upon you…"

"Then why are you?" Cordelia asked. He turned to look at her.

"Well… I may not like all of you… and Wolfram & Hart certainly hasn't won my affection… but I do like the world. And I like living in the world…" he said. Cordelia let out a snort.

"Of course you do, so you can try to take it over eventually," she said. Lindsey stepped closer to her, eye-to-eye.

"Do I really look like a world-domination threat?" he asked. Not liking the way Lindsey addressed her, or how close he stood, Angel growled low in his throat as he insinuated himself between the two. Cordelia, sensing Angel's temper about to snap, reached up and laid a restraining hand on his shoulder as she stepped by him.

"No, Lindsey, you don't look like a threat at all. But they say looks can be deceiving. And you've never been an 'all for one, one for all' sort of snake, so there's an agenda here. We're not stupid enough to think that this 'friendly guidance' of yours is anything but. So… you should just tell us what it is we need to know and get the hell out," Cordelia said harshly. Lindsey looked around the room at everyone who seemed to be mesmerized by the exchange, and then back to Cordelia.

"Such hostility… You're a smart one, Miss Chase. The Senior Partners need to look out for you," he said, pointing a quick finger in her direction before he turned and headed towards the door.

"Or do they need to look out for _you_?" Cordelia asked, causing him to stop and turn to look at her at the door.

"The kid is important. There's a reason why he's talked about in two ancient texts – granted one was… altered… slightly by Sahjahn's hand. But he was still a reckoning force the world would have had to deal with. The word 'Destroyer' isn't just a title… it's a prophecy all its own," he said before exiting. The room was silent as everyone thought over the lawyer's words.

"He was talking about me, wasn't he?" Conner finally said. No one answered. "I have no idea who any of you people are, I have crazy people in robes following me, there were flashbacks to a life I never led, and that guy was talking about me… I want to know what's going on!" All eyes went to Angel, who looked like he had just swallowed a porcupine. Who'd have thought the vampire would have to deal with a demanding teenager only a year or so after he came into being. Wes, knowing he was going to be of no assistance, picked up the scroll and the book.

"I'm… going to go… find the rest of the translation," the man stumbled uncomfortably as he rushed out the door. Gunn pointed towards the door as well.

"Somewhere in the building there's a melancholy Slayer… I'm going to go see if she wants to beat something up," he said, quickly taking the path that Wes took. Fred looked worried.

"Well… I'm going to go see if Wes needs any help," she said, pausing once on her way to the door. Lorne took the girl by the arm and continued the walk to the door.

"I'll go see what my almighty contacts have to say about all this hubbub. Tootles!" he cried as he all but ran out the door, dragging Fred behind him. Cordelia stayed behind, waiting to see if Angel would ask for her help. But father and son could only look at each other. Conner's sharp features were set in an expression of confusion and wariness as he looked at the man he didn't know. Angel's own face was a mixture of emotion.

"Cordelia…" Angel's voice called her. She straightened up as she approached him, but stopped as she caught the look in his eyes. He wasn't asking for her help. He was asking for her to leave. "Conner and I… need to… talk…" The words stumbled out of his mouth in a way that made Cordelia wonder exactly how he was going to say all the difficult stuff to his son.

"Okay…" she said, keeping the slight hurt she felt under control. "I'll go see if Wes needs me to do something. If you need anything…" She left the rest unsaid as she made her way out of the office without looking back.

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"Well, whatever Wesley is looking for… it isn't in this book," Cordelia said with a frustrated sigh. "I've been through it cover to cover and there is no mention of anything falafel-like…" Spike chuckled.

"Oh yes, because when the Watcher said 'world-ending catalyst', he really meant 'world-ending snack'…" the ghost said. Cordelia frowned.

"That's what falafel is? Wow… never would have guessed that," she said as she flipped open the cover of another book.

"I'm guessing that Wesley knows what 'feleolfor' means, he just wants to make sure it's correct. And in the meantime, he wants the two of us to feel useful. With Nancy-boy explaining what's what to junior, the green guy off conferring with the mystics, Gunn and Buffy off wielding sharp objects, and Wes and Fred being their genius selves… there was nothing left for the talented ones of the group," Spike said as he propped his booted feet up on Wesley's coffee table. Cordelia let out a sigh and set the book she was pretending to read down.

"I should have stayed and helped him," she said suddenly.

"Wes had all the help he needed with Fred there," Spike told her. Cordelia shook her head.

"No, not Wes. Angel. I should have stayed and helped him explain things to Conner. Conner doesn't know Angel… doesn't trust him… and he doesn't know the extent of his abilities. One of them could end up hurt," she explained, worry evident on her furrowed brow.

"What? And get your human self in the middle of two tense, supernatural beings? I don't know if I call that intelligent, luv," Spike commented. Cordelia shrugged.

"When have I ever done intelligent? I'm just saying… re-hashing everything is only going to cause Angel pain… and Conner more confusion. And then Conner will get angry and lash out at the father he doesn't remember. It will hurt Angel more. I've always been there to help diffuse things in the past… it just doesn't feel right that I'm not there now," she said sadly. "I guess it just goes to show how much things have changed since… well… Jasmine…"

"I don't think it was a slight against your marvelous person, luv. I think it was something dear ol' grandpap needed to deal with on his own. Plus, the less people around to see the sure-to-be-violent reaction from either of them the better, I'm sure," the ghost said. Cordelia let out a huff.

"This is just going to make him brood more. And wear black. All my hard work to finally get him into colors… down the drain with the snap of a prophetical finger," she said in exaggerated offense. "Man… I used to be a bitch. There are days where I miss the whole 'I don't care about anything but myself' attitude. I didn't care about other people's pain. Then, I came to L.A. and bam… smack dab in the middle of caring. I wish I didn't care, I wish I'd never come here…" Spike smiled.

"No, you don't," he said. Cordelia let out a breath.

"No, I don't. You're right," she said, smiling softly back at him. Spike let out a breath of his own, his blue eyes clouding over slightly.

"Pity you weren't around earlier, luv. I could have used your pretty shoulder. Now, pain is all I have left anymore, it seems. Buffy's made it clear that she has no concern for me. Yet I still can't seem to stop wanting the chit, and it hurts… and it certainly doesn't help matters that I can't hold a corporeal form," Cordelia's heart broke at those words. There wasn't much she could say to the ghostly vampire to help him through his obvious distress.

"I'm sorry Spike," was all she could offer. But he looked over at her and smiled gratefully, his eyes still slightly troubled.

"I used to think that once I had my soul everything would turn out roses… that Buffy would see me for something other than a bloody monster…" the ghost said, pacing slowly. Cordelia looked up to him from where she sat on the floor. Spike looked to the girl when she let out a dry chuckle.

"You know, people always thought I was the shallow one… that I was always the one lacking because I would always look out for myself or be enamored in the superficial. And to a point, that was true. But for all of their world-saving abilities and their do-good attitude… the Scoobies were never really ones for looking below the surface either. They dug down below the shell for each other, but never for others. I thought I had a chance with Xander. I thought he was finally seeing the girl beneath the bitch. Angel thought he had a chance to be something with Buffy. _You_ thought you had a chance to be something with Buffy… but in the end, we all got burned because they all saw the monster on the outside rather than the living, breathing, feeling person inside," Cordelia said as she wrapped her arms around her knees and laid her chin on them. Spike stopped pacing and looked down at her. She looked so young as she sat in front of Wesley's fireplace, the light from the flames playing over her skin. Her flawless features were relaxed, caught in the past.

"That's why they love you, you know," the ghost said finally as he sat down on the couch she leaned back against. Cordelia turned her face to look at him, her cheek resting against the material of her jeans.

"What are you talking about?" she asked. Spike smiled softly, the resulting look almost foreign to his chiseled face.

"It's why you are their heart, Cordelia. Wesley, Gunn, Fred… Angel… You see below their surface. You see more than what they _think_ they are and what they are in reality. Wesley isn't the failure he thinks he is. Gunn isn't the failure he thinks he is. Fred is more than the skinny, crazy girl. And Angel… he's not just the vampire… Angelus… everyone else sees him and judges him as. The same goes for me as well, luv. If I were able to bloody echo as I walked, then I know you'd see me as more than William the Bloody."

"He's right, you know," a voice said from the doorway. The two looked back to see Buffy standing in the open door. Cordelia stood up quickly and looked around the room uncomfortably.

"How much of that did you hear?" she asked. Buffy smiled sardonically as she made her way closer to the two.

"Oh, just the part where you were calling us small-minded. Fred wanted me to come find you," she said, resting her hands on the back of the couch. Her blue eyes met Cordelia's uncomfortable dark ones. "I never thought I'd say this to Cordelia Chase of all people, but you were right too." Cordelia hid her shock well, but the girl was stunned to her toes to hear such a concession from _the_ Buffy Summers.

"Oh? And what, pray tell, was I right about?" Cordelia asked icily, hiding behind the past. Buffy chuckled.

"Don't try that on me, Cordelia. I know the truth. I know the real you… I've been told all about the real you," the blond said. Cordelia relaxed and let her eyes fall to the ground.

"Angel…" she muttered, answering her own internal question. Buffy chuckled again as she came around the couch and placed herself on the opposite side from Spike.

"Among other people," the Slayer said, quickly looking at Spike and then back to the girl in front of her.

"What was I right about?" Cordelia suddenly asked. Buffy sat forward, resting her elbows on her knees.

"You were right with the whole 'shallow' speech…" she conceded.

"But…" Cordelia started until Buffy held up her hand.

"Save it Cordelia," the Slayer said, looking the other girl in the eyes. "You were no treat to be around back then, but then again, neither were we. I see that now… I know how hurt you were about Xander, and I know how hurt you were about being the outsider. And for what it's worth, I'm sorry." Cordelia crossed her arms.

"Wow. An apology from the Slayer… what _is_ that worth?" she asked rhetorically. Buffy gave the girl a small smile.

"You're just not going to let go, are you?" she asked of the brunette's façade. Cordelia was silent as she studied the floor for a second. Then the dark eyes rose to lock on the Slayer's.

"Old habits die hard, Buffy… if you get my drift…" she said, thinking of more than the old high school rivalry. Buffy nodded, understanding the girl's underlying meaning.

"I know that one real well, Cordelia. And trust me when I say that they die _very_ hard. It took for Sunnydale to be blown to bits and for me to come here to L.A. to finally understand some things. The past is the past… That's where it should be when two people change and grow apart," the Slayer said with a wistful sigh. Cordelia watched the blond girl as she came to grips with what she had just said.

"Or grow up…" Cordelia said back but then stopped to think. "… if a 250-some year old vampire could possibly grow up." Buffy let out a small laugh, but sobered quickly.

"You and I… we could never say we were friends. And at this juncture in our lives, I don't know if we ever could be. With that said, I _am_ sorry for my part in our past," she said. It took Cordelia a moment before she spoke.

"Yeah, well, I'm sorry too. I know I was the definition of unpleasant. Plus, you saved me a whole bunch of times when I'm sure it would have been easier to let the big bad have a go with me. So, thanks for that," she granted with a smile. Buffy gave her a smile in return. Then, there was a clearing of a distinctly male throat.

"Hate to break up this hugs and kisses moment, but I believe that this ghost has just had a vision…" Spike's voice broke into what even the most cynical person would call bonding between the two girls. Cordelia's eyes snapped to the blond man.

"What did you see?" she asked. Spike's eyes lost focus as he pictured the flashes in his mind again.

"Big bad, naturally… and when I say that, I mean heavy on the 'big'. Four horns, kind of a purple-gray color, black eyes… It's not here yet, it's being called… the damned bloody monks again…" he imparted in a ramble. Spike turned to look at the two girls, each watching him closely.

"We don't have long…" he said. Cordelia nodded as she rushed to the door.

"Let's get the others and get going," she said, nodding to Buffy, who was grabbing one of Wesley's stored weapons. Spike sat down on the couch and put his feet up.

"Come on, Spike. You're coming with us," Cordelia called. The ghost rolled his eyes.

"What good am I going to bloody do, luv?" he asked. Cordelia shared a quick look with Buffy and the blond girl spun to toss the weapon she held to Spike. The ghost's hand came up and caught it.

"If Phantom Dennis can wield a weapon, you sure as hell can too," Cordelia said as she opened the door.

"Plus," Buffy added. "We could always use an invulnerable pair of eyes." Cordelia grinned in agreement as she and Buffy went out the door. Spike looked down at the weapon he was holding.

"Lap dog to the cute, blond, superhuman Slayer and a beautiful, dictator-like brunette… this ghost _could_ well have it worse…" he said before he stood and followed the girls.

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"It's going to be a nasty mess should the horned bloke get there before us," Spike said from where he was perched in the back seat of the full convertible.

"Hopefully, we'll be there before they call it," Angel said, gripping the steering wheel tightly as he spun the car around the corner and brought the car to a screeching halt. Cordelia, Wes, Gunn and Buffy were over the side of the car before it came to a complete stop. It took Spike, Lorne, Conner and Fred a little longer to find their way out of the vehicle.

"You realize we probably just broke every rule in L.A. by riding with this many people in that hunk of metal, right?" Lorne asked. No one answered him as he looked around the abandoned industrial compound.

"And why is it the big baddies always chose places that reek of third-world rated décor?" Lorne asked with a put upon sigh. "If I were a big baddie, I'd choose somewhere funky, colorful and with good music… that way the people unfortunate enough to encounter me could all have a lighthearted approach to whatever I so choose for them, be it dying or just fighting me. Even _I_, the baddie in question, wouldn't be able to complain at the irony of going out in this world to the soulful melody of Louis Armstrong's 'What a Wonderful World' or the strong, poppy anthem of Gloria Gaynor's 'I Will Survive'…" Cordelia turned to the demon with an arched look.

"When you're through with your info-mercial, could you maybe shut up?" she asked. Lorne scoffed.

"Well excuuuuuse me for trying to bring a little culture into the group," he said before falling silent.

"Actually, Lorne… evil entities usually choose locations such as these because of their abandoned status and their remote locations. It makes it harder for screams of the tortured and dying to be heard," Wes said stoically as he gripped the handle of his axe a little tighter as he followed Angel through the door he'd opened. Lorne gave the back of Wes' head a stern look.

"Well thank you for the imparting of that information Mr. Britannica," he said before turning to Spike. "How big did you say this… thing… was going to be?"

"Big," was all Spike said. Lorne took a hard swallow.

"Wonderful. Well… I think I'm feeling a bit… green… so I'll just meet y'all in the car, okay?" he said, pointing to his face and then attempting to scurry off to the awaiting vehicle… but Gunn's strong arm stopped him and pulled him back into the procession.

"We're going to need all the firepower we can get on this one, twinkle toes…" the black man said before taking a stake from the waistband of his jeans and handing it to the demon. Lorne just looked at it dejectedly.

"I thought you said the thing was, to quote, 'big'… what good is this going to do? Give it a splinter?" he asked.

"You could always just talk it to death," Gunn commented causing Fred to let out a giggle. Conner stopped walking and looked between the tight knit group.

"It concerns me a little bit that you are treating this situation so lightly… like you've done it before," he said, still wondering silently what his purpose in the jaunt was to be. The gang slowed down as they emerged into the large, empty center room of the building.

"Well, Conner… saving the world is something we're good at. It's a weekly event," Cordelia told the boy as she surveyed the room with the others for any sign of evil doing.

"Yeah," Spike couldn't help but add. "… sometimes, it's bi-weekly…"

"Okay, so it's obviously not happening here… You said you saw an altar and those monks again, right?" Cordelia asked. The ghost looked around for familiar points in his vision.

"It's happening in the back…" Spike pointed.

"Oh, yes… couldn't just happen out here in the big open space where minimal contact between opponents could be made… has to happen in the small confines of a death box they call an office or whatever," Lorne scoffed as he followed the hurrying gang towards the back. The group reached the door and Angel, in his patented burst of violence, kicked in the door.

"We're too late," Cordelia commented with a sharp inhale as she came to a halt just inside the room. A dozen of the robed figures turned to confront the A.I. gang as a strong wind picked up. "They've already called it… whatever 'it' is." Spike watched warily as the group of figures seemed to protect the stone altar that sat behind them.

"From what I could gather from the vision, it is a spell to bring about a being that feeds off the evil of human kind. You could say it is evil incarnate," he said. And it was as if he'd called down the thunder as there was a sudden flash of light and a large, echoing roar. The robed figures scattered as the altar they'd worshipped at was picked up by the large, gray demon from Spike's vision. Its angry black gaze turned to the gang and after a moment, it tossed the heavy stone object at them as if it were nothing but a rag doll. Everyone scattered before the object reached them and it shattered into pieces as it struck the ground. The gang reconvened together and took their fighting positions.

"Evil incarnate, huh?" Cordelia scoffed, unimpressed. "I was expecting Richard Simmons…" Angel's eyes traveled up the form of their 10-foot-tall foe.

"Well, _I_ was expecting it to be taller…" he said dryly.

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_A/N…Whew, that was a lot of work. In all my story chapter posts, this is the fourth longest! Kinda got sick of looking at it after a while… so I threw in a Joss Whedon-like commercial break!! Muahahahahahahahahaha! I'm evil, I know. Sorry… but this was getting quite long and my brain wasn't ready to script out a fight scene. All the action yet to come... plus, more behind the mystery of… well… everything. evil music Duh… duh… duuuuuuuuuh… The plot's a'rollin' now, folks! Can't wait to see how this is going to finish up since we're over half way done (or so my muse says)! Let me know if you liked it! _


	17. Part XVII

**_It took so long to update because my computer was ill… and so was my brain. Hopefully, both are working correctly now and the plot train'll get going again! I've been gone so long even I had re-read a lot of the story to catch myself up… how sad is that?? I apologize in advance if this really sucks. Tell me if it does and I'll re-write if I have to… Now, onto the multitude of thanks to all my reviewers:_**

_Steffi__… Wow. I want to thank you for taking the time to really take a look at my piece and giving me great feedback. It always warms an author's heart to see someone taking such an interest in their story – and from another country as well! I'll tell you this, I've been to __Austria__ and skied on the __Alps__, but that was back when I was a little girl. I applaud the hard work it undoubtedly took to review! (And 2 of them, too!) I can safely say that you are the first reviewer from __Austria__. And thank you for the correction of my French. I don't speak the language, and haven't since… 5th grade, I think. So forgive me if I'm a little rusty. I sincerely appreciate everything you said. So I hope a hearty 'thank you' is adequate enough to cover my gratitude. I hope you like everything that's to come!_

_Lexi__… Thank you very much for your kind words. I'm glad I've inspired you to read Angel fics again. Now, we no longer have the TV fix. It's our imaginations (and hopefully future TV movies) that we have to survive with, sadly. I really hope I have a good ending as well!!_

_Angel Fan… Thank you!!! A lot of people seem to be saying that… and maybe one of these days, I'll actually believe them. It's nice to hear though, I'll admit. And sadly, S5 turned out worse that I would have ever imagined…and I can imagine a lot!_

_Zidane3… Buffy/Cordy friendship? I'm not sure I'd go so far as to say that. Let's just say they are coming to an apocalyptic truce for now. They've matured. Let's hope they act that way… And hopefully Wes did knock some sense into Angel. That vampire needs a good whap on the head. And Lorne… I love writing Lorne. He's so fun! I really hope you like this next part._

_Daishi MkII… I'm glad you like it! Here's more!_

_Anne… Thank you. I hope this part's okay. Sorry I didn't post it sooner. Computer problems, muse problems, real-life problems. This world has too many problems! I say ban problems!_

**_There are a few more review thanks at the end. My tendency to ramble caused this to get veeeeeery long. _****_Sorry_**

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

"You know… I'd say scatter… but I think that may actually get us killed quicker," Gunn said, gripping his weapon harder as he stared at the large demon. Cordelia looked around at the robed figures as they prepared to fight.

"Good to know you're confidence in us is so strong, Gunn," she said. Gunn nodded solemnly, but Cordelia didn't see him.

"Oh yes… I'm confident. Confident that this is gonna hurt… a lot," the black man said. Angel let out a growl to silence his friend.

"Everyone spread out. Gunn, Buffy and I will take on the Hulk here, and the rest of you… take out the monks," Angel called before running forward to engage the demon, Gunn and Buffy following behind him. Cordelia let out a little 'pfft.'

"Well, gee. Give us the _easy_ job why don't you…" she said sarcastically. Wes looked over at her with a small smirk.

"Shall we?" he asked. Cordelia nodded.

"Oh yes… we… shall," she answered as she and Wes headed the second charge into the fight, swords and cross bows swinging.

Wes took out one of the monks immediately with a superb crossbow shot and was about to turn for another when two of the monks grabbed his arms from behind. Lorne and Conner immediately swept around behind them and grabbed one of them while Fred and Cordelia went to fight off the second. Wes freed his arms and helped to dispose of the monk the girls were fighting. Taking a chance, the ex-Watcher turned to see the progress of Gunn, Buffy and Angel. Buffy and Gunn had both been shaken off by the demon and were both climbing to their feet as Angel held his own against the attack. Conner, who to this point had watched the scuffle, picked up a discarded sword and warded off an attack from another monk. Wes stepped back next to Cordelia.

"They're not doing much damage to the demon… its height has them at a disadvantage," the Englishman noted to her. Cordelia's eyes nodded as she and Wes fended off blows.

"Their weapons aren't doing more than scratching the surface," she agreed.

"We'll have to find a vulnerable spot," he stated. Fred grunted as she kicked a monk away from her.

"Isn't that usually the head or the heart?" she asked. Cordelia grinned as she turned back to Wes.

"Care to take a few well placed shots at Gigantor's knees?" she suggested. Wes' eyes went from the demon back to Cordelia.

"I'll need a bit of assistance," he said. Cordelia nodded as she turned to Lorne.

"Go help Wesley," she ordered. Lorne looked shocked.

"Me? I'm usually on 'victim to safety' duty… I'm already sucked my well of expertise dry, kitten… I'd most likely get us both killed," he said as he gingerly touched his bleeding cheek. Realizing that the green demon was right, she spun to address the "muscle" of their group.

"The legs, Buffy! Go for the legs!" Cordelia cried to the Slayer as she fended off one of the last few monks. The blond didn't turn from her assault, but nodded and gripped her weapon tighter. She then stepped off to the back and stabbed her sword into the back of the monster's leg just as Wes shot a crossbow shot into the other.

"Watch yourself, Buffy!" Spike called from where he was observing. "He's headed your direction…" The Slayer saw what the ghost meant and immediate flipped herself out of the way.

The monster fell to the ground with a pained roar, and immediately, Angel and Gunn pounced. The vampire went for the jugular as Gunn went for where the beast's heart was anticipated as being. A monstrous arm gave one last swing at the group before it fell limp to the ground and didn't move again. Everyone circled around, still breathing heavily from the exertion.

"Is it dead?" Lorne asked, peeking over Fred's shoulder. The tiny Texan turned and looked at him with a smile.

"I sure hope so, otherwise we could end up lunch…" she said.

"Well, we stopped the big bad, what next?" Buffy asked, still a little out of breath. Gunn let out a snort.

"I'm going to Disneyland," he said, causing Fred to giggle. Angel looked around the alleyway for a moment making sure everyone was alright.

"What do we do now?" Conner asked, wiping a spot of blood from his cheek and looking at it in a detached sort of awe. "Is it over?"

"I don't think that demon was all we have to worry about. Suffice it to say that there's always a plan B," Wes said solemnly as he frowned. All eyes turned to him.

"Don't say stuff like that, Wes," Cordelia scolded. "It borrows trouble…" Suddenly there was a groan from the ground. Everyone looked to see a monk coming to and trying to get up while holding a wound on his stomach.

"There is no way to stop what is to come… the blood of the Destroyer has brought forth the apocalypse… it is only the beginning of the end…" the robed figure said with a painful cough. Cordelia spun to look at Wes again.

"See! Borrowing trouble!" she said, pointing at the monk. There was a large wheezing noise, and then a small thud as the body of the monk fell back to the cement. All eyes looked to Conner, who stood with the tip of his weapon slightly more bloody than it had been moments before. Noticing the looks they were giving him, the teenager looked only slightly abashed as he shrugged.

"What are we going to do now?" Fred asked, looking worriedly to where the monk now lay dead.

"We can't ask him to explain himself anymore," Gunn said as his foot prodding the unmoving body.

"All we can do now is try to find whatever it is that's going to end the world," Angel said. Spike rolled his eyes.

"Oh, yeah, that narrows it down, mate," he drawled. Buffy glared at him causing him to shrug. "What?" Silence fell as each member of the Fang Gang thought over everything.

"Well," Cordelia started as she looked down at her blood stained clothing. "That was fun… Now… anyone know a good pizza joint?" The gang all smiled slightly as they started meandering back to the car they came in. Gunn slung an arm around her shoulders.

"Barbie doll… you're with the big leagues now… We _own_ the good pizza joints," he said. Cordelia laughed with the rest of the group at his arrogant statement, but something went cold in her as how much things had really changed sunk in once more… Her change in demeanor was slight as they all piled in the car. So slight, in fact, that it would have almost gone undetected by even the most emotionally stunted of vampires. _Almost_…

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

_Back at Wolfram & Hart…_

Fred turned page after page, not really looking at the words in the magazine. Gunn and Lorne stood at her side either staring off into space or idly looking around the lobby. Wesley had immediately taken the text and holed himself up in his office. Spike and Buffy sulked off to continue the bickering they'd started on the ride back to the office. And sensing Cordelia's last thread about to snap, Angel had squired the brunette away somewhere upstairs in order to spare the Fang Gang whatever was destined to pop out of Cordelia's mouth.

"Makes ya wish we were back in the Hyperion, doesn't it?" Gunn broke the silence, startling both Fred and Lorne.

"What do you mean?" Fred asked. Gunn smirked when he turned to look at her.

"With the acoustics in that place, we'd be hearing two arguments right now whether we wanted to or not," he said.

"Dontcha think we've had enough of those? I, for one, could go without hearing an argument for the next millennium," Fred said as she settled back down to look at her magazine.

"Aren't you just the tiniest bit curious as to what drama's going to unfold?" Gunn asked. Lorne snorted as he leaned casually against the front desk.

"Drama? What do I look like? A thespian? No way, Jose… Drama and I are through. No siree, kiddies… when I see drama, I will run screaming in the other direction," the green demon said. This time it was Gunn who snorted.

"And that's different from any other day, _how_?" he asked. Lorne narrowed his red eyes slightly as Fred coughed over a giggle.

"Just for that, I will never regale you with another rendition of 'Hello Dolly' ever again," he said. Gunn smirked again.

"Oh yeah, that's a bad thing…" he said with a roll of his eyes.

"I'll have you know that I was voted Most Likely to be the Next Green-skinned, Non-smoking version of Dean Martin, okay? People _love_ my voice… I am the Robert Goulet of all things vocal…" Lorne said with flourish.

"Robert who?" Fred asked with an unknowing frown. Lorne looked over at her in shock.

"Robert _who_?!" He asked incredulously. "There was Elvis… there was Frankie… there was Dino… there was Sammy… and then there was Goulet…" Gunn turned to look at Fred.

"Isn't that some sort of food? You know… with noodles and meat and…" he started, words failing him in his description. Fred smiled at the black man's unusual-as-of-late verbal stumbling.

"That's gou-_lash_, Charles…" she said happily. Lorne let out a huff as he leaned himself back against the front desk.

"The Powers know I've tried to bring some culture to this group, but alas, you are all a bunch of boorish, unrefined ninnies," he said with a wave of his hand at them. Whatever cutting remark Gunn was sure to throw back was cut off.

"Well, the prodigals have returned," Lindsey's voice reverberated through the large room as he approached them. The other three each stood up straight as they watched him approach cautiously.

"Did you stick around to relay more cryptic warnings to us?" Gunn asked. "Cuz we don't take kindly to the line of bullshit you're trying to sell…" Lindsey gave the black man a sneer before leaning against the front desk next to Fred.

"What's another brilliant mind coming back to the fold?" Lindsey asked with an arch of an eyebrow. "You'd know all about brilliant minds, wouldn't you, Mr. Gunn?" Gunn glared as he stepped towards the man.

"You'd best be shutting up about things you know nothing about," he growled. Lindsey smirked.

"How sad it is to see you reverting to your thuggish ways. You'd have gone far in this firm…" he said looking around the lobby fondly.

"And you'd know all about that, wouldn't you, lawyer-boy," Gunn threw back. Lorne and Fred could only watch the two as they continued to stare each other down, having no idea what to say to break the tense situation.

"Lindsey…" Wes' voice broke the stare down between Gunn and the ex-lawyer. "May I ask what brings your presence here… again?" Lindsey turned towards the still blood spattered ex-Watcher.

"The Senior Partners are losing their hold on you all now that your little Seer is back. It was why she was taken away in the first place," Lindsey said, surprising everyone by getting to the point. "You are all starting to remember exactly what the Partners have made you forget. By coming to Wolfram and Hart, all you've done is fight exactly what the Partners have wanted you to fight. In the past year, your ability to fight as a team…"

"A _family_…" Fred interrupted with an angry growl. Lindsey turned towards her for a second and gave her an appraising look.

"Yeah, whatever. You have your fluffy bunny version, and I have mine. Anyway," he said, turning back to the others at large. "You ability to fight together has been pretty much non-existent. You compromised the power you held over the Partners by all agreeing to your little side-trips in the firm…"

"We didn't exactly have a choice in that, Lindsey. Angel was the one that altered our memories. The path was laid out before us without our consent," Wes told the man. Lindsey chuckled.

"Oh, trust me, you wouldn't have forgotten if you hadn't wanted to in the first place. You all had your little betrayals, and it led to a little bit of selfishness… But Angel beat you all to it. In the end, you all abandoned your little…" Lindsey paused with a look back at Fred. "… _family_. Why do you think Cordelia was in the state she was for so long without any one of you lifting a finger?" There was silence again.

"How do you know all this, Lindsey?" Wes asked cautiously. Gunn's eyes narrowed.

"I'd like to know that too," he said. Lindsey just smiled.

"Let's put it this way… when you buy into Wolfram and Hart, you can never really buy out. We sign contracts that are pretty much loophole free. But that doesn't mean a person like me can't fly beneath the radar and pick up other alliances…" he said cryptically.

"That doesn't help with the confusion, sugar doodles…" Lorne broke in. "I've been watching you and your aura says you're telling the truth. But your truth hasn't really shed any light at all…" Lindsey let out a sigh.

"I can only spell it out so much. I gave Angel as much help as I could and I'm giving you as much help as I can. Now that your memories are steadily coming back, it should help. But all of you are sitting in the belly of the beast right now. If you stay here, you will continue to be affected," he said. "And…"

Suddenly, the ex-lawyer stopped talking. His eyes went wide for a moment before he clutched his head and fell to the ground. It was eerie how there was no sound coming out of the gaping man's mouth, but it looked as if he were in interminable pain.

"Fred…" Wes said as he watched Lindsey writhe in unspoken pain on the ground. The scientist stepped next to him. "Would you please go find Angel? I believe there's more going on here than we comprehend…"

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

Cordelia glared at the vampire as he pushed her into his apartment.

"What's wrong Cordy?" Angel asked as he closed the door behind them. There was a spark in her eye that told Angel she wanted to say something that was sure to be biting, but to his surprise, she held back. Her jaw was clenched as she crossed the room and sat stiffly in one of his leather chairs. Her hands ran over the slick material and her dark eyes ran over the room with anger that seemed to increase exponentially. Angel could hear her blood pumping quickly through her veins – so fast, in fact, that if she didn't let out a breath soon, he was sure she'd explode. But, Cordelia surprised him again. She let out the breath that she needed, but rather than let out a stream of her verbal sort of warfare, she collapsed back against the chair. Her eyes closed and she tried to visualize things the way they should be. She verbalized it all with one word…

"Why?" she asked. Angel frowned, trying to understand what she was referencing. The look on his face didn't escape the young woman's notice. Letting out a sigh, she stood up and started to meander around the large living room area. Every once in a while she'd reach out and gingerly touch an artifact or a book or the freshly dusted surface of an expensive piece of furniture.

"Why are you all still here?" she clarified after a few silent minutes. Angel didn't pretend to misunderstand her meaning.

"Is that all?" he asked, not realizing that he'd made her worry seem unimportant. She rounded on him, her eyes narrowed.

"Excuse me?" she asked him. Inwardly, the vampire groaned at his blunder.

"I didn't mean it that way, Cor. It's just that I know how much you hate it here, okay? I just don't want to circumvent our way around the real issue with stuff that will only lead to us arguing and not fixing anything," he said.

"Circumvent? Did you borrow Gunn's word of the day calendar? And what's to say what my real issue is? Maybe nothing's wrong at all. Maybe life's just 'business as usual'. Let's not forget that I just came out of a coma and was dropped directly into bizarro world. Maybe Cordy's just crazy…" she said. "So, I guess I really don't need to talk to you about this. I can figure this out on my own. I can adapt to whatever I need to. I am the _queen_ of adaptation…"

"You're not crazy, Cordy. You were out for almost a year! It's understandable that you aren't comfortable here. But you can talk to me… us… about it…"

"Don't start that bullshit with me, Angel. Please. On a _good_ day, my ability to flay even the undead to unrecognizable bits with just my words is usually classified as a weapon of mass destruction, okay?" she warned. Angel stopped trying to explain things away since that seemed to be getting him into trouble. Instead, he paused and took a deep breath.

"I'm not going to buy into this 'leave Cordy alone until the crisis passes' thing that you always fall back on. You wanted to talk, let's talk. If you want to yell, Cordy, I can handle it. Just let me know what the problem is," he said. Cordelia's eyes locked, unblinking, on his.

"You want to know what my problem is?" she asked quietly. Angel nodded.

"Yes. I do," he said. Cordelia fell silent, but the vampire knew full well that she was thinking of where to start.

"My problem is this place," she said, suddenly, in a surprisingly even voice. "But you know that. My problem is the people that are here… and I'm not just talking about the cronies of evil that are lurking in the halls. I'm also talking about Fred and Wes and Lorne and Gunn… and you… and me… and all of us." Angel started to speak, but Cordelia held up her hand to stop him.

"Please Angel, let me get this out, okay?" she asked. Angel's dark eyes roamed over her face for a moment before he leaned back on the arm of the couch, crossed his arms, and nodded for her to continue. She let out a thankful breath.

"I went away… to the higher powers… thinking that I would be helping everyone. But little did I know that things had been set in motion as far back as my birthday so that I could eventually wreak havoc on everything that I knew and loved…" she said. Angel made to say something, but she held up a hand to stop him.

"I know, Angel. It wasn't me… yadda, yadda, yadda… I know. I haven't come to grips with it all yet, but I'm dealing, okay? What I'm trying to say is that everyone's changed. I don't like it. Whatever happened in the midst of my out-of-body experience clicked this little button in everyone that changed them into someone I don't recognize any more. I want to fix things, but it seems as if I'm incapable of it. My demon powers are gone, my ability to understand my friends is gone…" she paused as she looked down at herself quickly. "… and it seems my ability to accessorize has flown out the window with everything else. I've come back to a world where I have no bearing." Angel took a breath as he mentally prepared his next words.

"If you're implying that it was a mistake for you to come back, I can't even begin to tell you how wrong you are. We need you here," he said. Cordelia let out her patented 'pfft' one more time.

"What? To look pretty?" she asked then looked at her reflection in one of the mirrors. "Even that's debatable… But if that's what you want, Buffy's come in to save the day. I certainly don't need to be around for that." Angel gritted his teeth at the new subject she unconsciously brought up.

"Is that what this is all about, Cordy? That Buffy's here?" he asked. Cordelia looked at him, her eyes showing nothing.

"Yes…" she admitted. Angel started to talk but was cut off. "… and no…" Silence fell again, but Angel was patient. Cordelia let out a breath.

"What good am I here, Angel? I'm among people I don't even really know anymore, in a place I despise, in a body that has done unimaginable things to everyone I loved..." Finally, the patience was at its end.

"You're not her, Cordelia! I don't know how many times I have to tell you that, but I will keep on doing it until you believe me," Angel finally broke in. Cordelia turned to him with a frown.

"You can honestly say that when you look at me – the _real_ me – you don't see what Jasmine did? You don't see what she did to and _with_ your son? With Conner?" she asked. Angel turned away from her so that she wouldn't see the pain in his eyes at that memory. But the stiffness in his shoulders told her so much.

"It wasn't a rhetorical question, Angel," she said bitterly. Finally, Angel spun around to look at her – the pain was gone and a stony anger replacing it.

"Rhetorical? You want rhetorical, Cordy? Then let's ask _you_ a question. When you look at me, do you only see him?" he asked. Cordelia looked confused for a second.

"Angel, you know full well that Angelus…" she started, but Angel waved a hand, cutting her off.

"I'm not talking about Angelus, Cor," he said almost harshly. Cordelia frowned again.

"Then who?" she asked. Angel sighed.

"I'm talking about the vampire who loved Buffy. Will you ever see past those Sunnydale blinders and not see him?" he asked. The harsh look on Cordelia's face softened.

"I don't see you as the Angel from then," she told him. Angel shook his head.

"I'd believe you if Buffy wouldn't continue to be an issue with you. With me she's not, so why do you continue to make her into one?" he asked as he crossed the room closer to her.

"She was the love of your life, Angel," Cordelia said, a slight frog in her throat making her voice raspier than normal. To his credit, Angel did not flinch in the slightest at that description of his Sunnydale years as he stepped forward and lightly gripped her arms.

"It's not possible," he said. Cordelia let out a 'pfft' as she tried to step back.

"You forget I was there, Angel. The Romeo and Juliet, star-crossed, and all that Shakespeare-y fairy dust…" she said, reaching up to brush his hands off her shoulders. His grip only tightened.

"No, Cor. You are going to stand right there while I tell you this…" Angel said firmly, his eyes boring into hers. "I loved Buffy… yes… I can't deny that. But she was not the love of my life. It's impossible to say that because back then I didn't have a life. I didn't start having a life until I came to Los Angeles and a beautiful brunette forced one on me. In a city of millions I found you again, Cordelia, and you've become such an integral part of my life I can't imagine you not being there. If anything's star-crossed, I'd say that would be it…" Cordelia stood speechless as she tried valiantly to find something to say. There were tears itching the corner of her eyes and her eyes darted around the room to keep them at bay. But Angel had other ideas as his cool finger reached over and brought her chin back to center, her eyes looking back at him.

"I love you, Cordelia," he said softly. "You are the love of the life you gave back to me…" There was no holding back the tear as it fell down Cordelia's cheek. She smiled softly, knowing full well the conversation they'd started wasn't over, but needing to focus on the happiness his words wrought.

"When did you get so wordy?" she teased. He smiled as his hand came up to run over her cheek.

"The moment I realized that my inability to speak around you tends to lead to me losing you," he said. Cordelia's eyes went wide with sudden insight.

"The ballet…" she said softly. Angel nodded.

"Among others…" he said. Suddenly, Cordelia wrapped her arms around Angel's neck and hugged him close. His hand came up to hug around her waist, holding her as tightly as she was clinging to him.

"How could we have been so stupid?" she asked. "I love you too, Angel." She drew her head back so that she could look at him. He was smiling beautifully at her and she grinned back. They were just leaning in to share a kiss as a knock came over the door. Angel let out a small growl that only Cordelia heard, and she let out a small laugh.

"Go away!" she sang to whoever had decided to interrupt them.

"Sorry to… well… sorry," Fred's voice broke in, her own displeasure at having to interrupt them evident. "Wes told me to come get you, Angel. That lawyer, Lindsey, is in the lobby… and he's kinda… _twitchy_… at the moment." Angel's grip on Cordelia's waist loosened as she chuckled at Fred's description.

"Do apocalypses have pause buttons?" he asked. Cordelia shook her head.

"I don't think so. But we're not leaving this room without this…" she said, taking charge and laying her warm lips over her vampire's cool ones. Angel's grip tightened once more as he held her close and everything else seemed to disappear. For a moment, a_ brief_ moment, it was just the two of them in a place that had been waiting for them for a frustratingly long time. Fred looked at the two of them with a happiness she'd thought she'd lost in her eyes. The two champions had finally found their place together. _Kyerumption__…_ It was a word that everyone had been so close to forgetting. But it seemed to be back now. When the two pulled back, they each had smiles on their faces that Fred hadn't seen in a long time. In fact, she frowned, there hadn't been many smiles at all in the past year or so. It was nice to see them again.

"Well, let's go save the world from big gray meanies, monk-like creepies and former lawyers from Hell…" Cordelia said after a moment, pulling away from Angel reluctantly.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

**_A/N – Now THAT is what we were all waiting for, wasn't it??? Sorry to have taken so long to get there, but the plot monkey had to throw in all that angst to make that moment seem all the better… it's a writer's tool of sorts… Now… what's up with Lindsey?? Any guesses?? Any ideas?? Please, share them… I love it when reviewers try to take a stab at what's going to happen. It makes the grueling hours worth it (for me at least…)!_**

**_Here are more thank you's… :)_**

_Veggie-babu-chan… Thank you for being the 133rd or so to review!! At this rate, I may hit 200 reviews before this is all over. You have no idea how happy I'd be if that happened. It makes me want to do the "They like me, they really really like me!" dance in the middle of a street somewhere. I really wish this did take place instead of the other S5. Damn Whedon… that misery-inducing genius. I have a serious love/hate relationship with the idea of him right now. Enough people have said this is Whedon/WB worthy, and I'm starting to believe them a bit. Too bad I couldn't have tapped into the man's brain and been his muse for the last episodes. I think I could have helped him out a lot… Thank you for your great review! I hope you liked the next installment!_

_Imzadi__…__Yes, I agree that Angel can be a sanctimonious sob at times. And Cordy isn't Cordy without a bit of the Queen C attitude. It's why I loved her from the beginning. And I agree with you that Lindsey needs a girl. Strangely enough on pairing Lindsey with someone, (and don't hate me for this) I've been leaning towards Fred… I mean I love the idea of her with Wes, but the F/L pairing has been setting off sirens in my head as something that could work. What do you think? Plus, it would add another angst angle where Gunn & Wes are concerned (like there isn't enough of that already…:P) I just don't know, though… hmmm…we'll see where I put our favorite lawyer…_

_Diana Troy… Thank you for your honest opinion about Cordelia. But my reasoning behind putting more Queen C in this chapter is to hit the point home that you can't like everyone all the time. Everyone has their flaws. Where Angel's have been dragged through the mud in my story, Cordelia isn't the saint everyone wants to paint her as (I can't believe I actually admitted that!!!). And as much as I don't like Buffy, she has redeeming qualities as well. I'm sick of stories pitting the two against each other. But on the flip side, I don't like stories that make them to be best friends either. There's too much bad blood between them to make that realistic. I just figured that once they got past all the petty bullshit, they could possibly be civil, mature adults and possibly complement each other at times. Now, other things… I agree about Angel's concern for Cordy on the show. And I really think someone needed to call him on it. It was hard deciding whether Wes or Spike should have been the one to do it. But the history forced me to choose Wes. And I think he did a superb job of it. And I agree about the Spike/Cordy friendship. Sigh Yet another unexplored possibility down the freakin' toilet. It's sad, really, how many of those there were. Anyway, thank you for your very kind words. I appreciate your support and your amazing reviews. It's always nice to know there will be a familiar friendly name among the others when I post an update! I hope you liked this part!_

_Blaire… Good to see you haven't given up on the story. Sorry it's taken me so long. I love Wes too, but I doubt there's going to be a C/W pairing… more like a strengthening of their friendship. Thanks for the review!_

_Emilyfirefly__… Glad you like it! Hopefully, I'll see your name in future reviews!_

_Angel-cordy… Sorry the slowness of my updates seems to be hampering your reading. I hope you still like it!!_


	18. Part XVIII

_**Diana Troy… Glad you returned! :) I hear you 100 percenton the whole Buffy Bias. I was always 'I hate, despise, loathe Buffy' but then I realized that I disliked her mostly because of the other fics I've read as well… and for how she just breezed in and out on 'Angel' leaving misery in her wake. But I thought back to the original 'Buffy' and why I liked it (other than Angel and Cordy). So, I'd rather see the two girls complement each other more and grow rather than carry on a juvenile grudge. I'm glad you approve. It's always ticked me off about Cordy's coma as well. The show did a complete 180 without properly explaining anything. It was SOOO frustrating. I pretty much stopped watching for that reason alone. And the final episode did nothing for me – except make me sad that Wes died. Anyways, we'll all have to see where I go with this. Cross your fingers that it all turns out well. Thanks for the lovely review. See ya in the new year!**_

**_Yashoda__… Oh my… I'll second your 'Gah!'. That was one of the nicest reviews I've received in a while. I'm sorry that it's been so agonizing with the updates. I'll try to be better about that. But, your review has inspired me to write. So, more Lindsey, more C/A, possibly a F/S thingy as you requested… who knows where this will go! Thank you for the splendid review. You've made my crappy day a lot brighter. Now, I've got to go write… :)_**

**_Imzadi__… I'm glad you're still reading. I worry when it takes me a while to update that everyone's going to be sooooo pissed at me that they'll flame me or not read anymore just to get even! I forgot about the long-lost siblings theory! I remember you saying that before. Sorry about that. I don't think I'll introduce Gwen/Kate/Anne in this story because it may mess with the plot and make this more epic than it's turned out to be. Sorry! Plus I really don't think I'd do them justice (the pairing), but who knows… maybe later… Thanks for sticking with me! Later!_**

_**AngelCordyFan32… Thanks for your review on BOTH of my Angel pieces. I'm glad you like 'em. Ooooooooh, I love guesses! They make me happy. We'll see if you're right! Thank you, again, for the great review. I won't make you beg… much! :)**_

_**Genevieve719… I recognize that name! I'm glad you liked it. I know it's been a while… a LONG while, to be precise. Angel just hasn't been as insisting as it has been in the past. I'm hoping that'll change, though. Thanks for the loyal review. I appreciate it!**_

**_Goldenshadows__… I love A/C stories too! I'm not sure I'm going to introduce more characters at this pint. It may screw up the plot and make this insufferably long. Hopefully, I can tie this together soon! Thanks for the review, I love 'em._**

_**Angel-cordy… You came back! Oh yay! I really am sorry about the waiting. I'm not a patient reader either. I'll try to be better, but I really can't promise… sorry…**_

**O:X:O:X:O:X:O:X:O:X:O:X:O:X:O**

Lindsey felt a cool hand on his forehead as the world began to come back to him.

"He feels cool to the touch. At least he doesn't look like he's in pain anymore," a woman's voice said as his vision started to clear. After a moment, Cordelia Chase's concerned gaze was distinguishable to him. The fact that she hadn't jumped when his gaze connected with hers told him that he must have been conscious during this latest attack. With a groan, he raised a hand to his aching forehead. _That_ caused everyone to jump.

"Well… that was fun," he said wryly. Cordelia stood up, the concerned look becoming stony.

"What the hell happened?" she asked. Lindsey looked up at her and tried to smirk.

"Awww, you worried? I thought I was a threat," he commented. Cordelia's eyes narrowed slightly.

"I don't need to take out an ad to say that I don't trust you, Lindsey. But no one deserves what I just saw," she said, a mixture of wariness and understanding in her voice.

"What _was_ that?" the girl named Fred asked. Lindsey turned to her, careful not to overtax his aching muscles.

"Remember those loopholes I mentioned earlier?" he asked. Wes, Gunn and Fred all nodded. "That was the lack thereof…" Wes stooped down next to the ex-lawyer.

"You mean that was the Senior Partners?" he asked, pulling together some idea of what was going on, and forming his own suspicions. Lindsey nodded once.

"That was their version of 'Honey, I'm home'…" he said bitterly. "Especially now that they know I'm here… and why…" Angel, who had been completely silent up to this point, stepped forward, arms crossed over his chest.

"Why, _exactly_, are you here? You never answered my question before besides give us cryptic remarks," he said. Lindsey sat up onto his elbows and looked at the vampire.

"I'm here because… I need help…" he said with a resigned sigh. Gunn frowned.

"Why should we help you? The last time we did that, you threw it back in our faces," he said.

"I meant what I said before. I don't want the world. I'm done with the power trip. All it's ever done is take from me. If the Senior Partners go down, my life is my own again. _That's_ all I want…" he said.

"Really?" Angel asked doubtfully. Lindsey rolled his eyes.

"Don't you get it? The Senior Partners have been behind everything. It wasn't a coincidence that Miss Chase's guide to becoming a 'higher power' was that demon Skip. The Powers were never part of that equation. The only time the Powers came into play at all in the past year was to ensure Miss Chase's body became her own again… in whatever form she so chose," Lindsey said as he sat up completely. Wes held out a hand to him to help him stand. The ex-lawyer looked at it for a second before he reached up and took it.

"How did you come to know all of this Lindsey?" the ex-Watcher asked. Lindsey brushed himself off before speaking.

"The Powers came to me," he said. Fred nodded.

"You said that you had another allegiance… but why you?" she asked. Lindsey let out snort.

"It was safe to say that none of you were in any condition to become a messenger – or even receptive enough to understand. You were all here playing with your own little version of the Dark Arts. Miss Chase was understandably occupied at the time. And the Powers knew that I wanted out," he said simply. Everyone in the room shuffled uncomfortably at the mention of their own part in whatever mess has been unleashed.

"Out of what?" Wes asked.

"Out of the contract. Wolfram & Hart offer power, prestige and a chance to take over the world in exchange for your life. I want no part in the first and to regain the last… but seeing as it's the Senior Partners, it's understandable that they won't see it so simply. They want me dead," Lindsey said. Spike chuckled.

"I'll send flowers for your casket, mate," the ghost said with a smirk. "You look like a tiptoe through the tulips sorta bloke…"

"Shut up, Spike," Buffy hissed from where she stood. "You're not helping."

"You forget, Slayer, I'm not here to help. I'm here to antagonize… and, of course, look pretty. Powers know you lot don't even come close," he said as he sat himself down on the arm of the couch that Lindsey had moved to. Cordelia let out a 'pffft' as she crossed her arms.

"You're Vision Boy. _I'm_ the one who's here to antagonize and look pretty," she said. Spike grinned at her.

"Throw down for the title, luv?" he asked. Again, Cordelia let out a 'pffft'.

"Right… anyways, what are we going to do about Lindsey?" she asked, turning to look at Angel, who was still half-glaring at, half-observing the ex-lawyer. Lindsey stood up and held up a hand to stop whatever conversation was going to start.

"I don't want your help… I just want you to do what you're supposed to do. When you do that, then I'll get what I want," he said.

"And what, precisely, are we supposed to do? You've been less than forthcoming with us. You've told us why you are here and what you're supposed to be doing, but you haven't really told us anything," Wes said.

Lindsey let out a sigh as he sat down again.

"You guys have been on the right track. It centers around the boy," he said, looking over at Conner. All eyes went to the teenager as well before going back to Lindsey.

"You're saying that his blood has started the apocalypse," Wes said more than asked. Lindsey nodded.

"We took care of that demon," Fred noted. "Do you know what else is happening?"

"The demon was a part of the calling ritual, not even a speck on the apocalyptic hierarchy. There will be attacks, there will be more rituals, there will be more demon uprisings than ever before," he said. Buffy shuffled uncomfortably.

"Maybe I should be back at the Hellmouth. The gang won't be able to handle all of that by themselves without me or Spike," she said. Spike's eyes shot to the Slayer, surprised that she'd even acknowledge his help in front of others. Lindsey shook his head.

"No. You will be needed here. The attacks, rituals and uprisings are only the side-show. The warm-up, if you will. The main act will be something you should have been expecting for the past year…" he said.

"What is it?" Gunn asked. The ex-lawyer rolled his eyes.

"If you think I'm going to tell you outright so I can have another fit, you've got another thing coming. But if you just sat still for two seconds and actually thought about it, you could probably figure it out all by your lonesome…" he said. Silence fell over the group. Cordelia stood up straight.

"We've got to go to the hotel…" she said suddenly. Everyone looked at her.

"What are you saying, Cordelia?" Wes asked, a frown on his face.

"Think about it Wes. Let's start putting some things together… who or what has been a major life altering factor in everyone's life for the past year or so?" she asked. Everyone looked around the room for a second, each thinking over everything that they knew.

"The Senior Partners," Angel said finally, his eyes meeting Cordelia's. She nodded.

"Exactly. They arranged for my vacation, they arranged for Conner's kidnapping, they altered memories, they gave each and every one of you a 'new life'. That new life included you being their pawns, working in the belly of the beast. You thought it would be to your advantage to work out of here. But really, all it was doing was providing each of you distractions away from what was really going on," she said. "So…"

"The hotel would provide us with neutral ground, away from whatever could have been influencing us here," Wes said. Cordelia nodded.

"Is it still empty?" she asked, looking to the vampire. Angel nodded once. Lindsey stood.

"By jove, I do believe you've won the Christmas ham…" he said. "Now that you seem to be on track…"

"Aren't you coming with us?" Fred asked with a frown. Gunn stepped forward.

"Yeah, this could be a trap, you know. And we wouldn't want little old you just up and disappearing all of a sudden now, would we?" he asked, clenching his fists. Lindsey held up his hands.

"The Powers can protect me only so much. It's why I have those little fits now rather than being straight out dead. The Senior Partners are powerful enough to keep me from outright helping you, but the Powers know enough to help me dodge them for a little bit. I can't be any more help to you right now. I need to go lie low," he said before turning to leave. Buffy stepped forward to stop the retreating man.

"You can't just leave us now! You're the only information we've got against whatever is going to happen!" she said.

"Yeah," Fred said, stepping forward as well. "You should probably be here with us. We have no idea what they're going to spring on us next."

"I do believe I know," Wes said quietly. He turned to look at everyone. "It's not just a matter of the Senior Partners calling up something dastardly to end the world…"

"Then what is it, Wes?" Buffy asked, impatient at all the drama. Wes grimaced.

"It _is_ the Senior Partners," he said. Gunn stood up straight, his arms crossed over his broad chest.

"So you're saying that this could very well be the _actual_ end of the world battle? The big guns are being brought out? No evil lackeys that we can take down with our lethal banter, deadly skills, and ruthless good looks?" he asked. Wes nodded solemnly.

"I do believe that Cordelia's suggestion of moving to the hotel may be best at this point. We are certainly not prepared for whatever the Senior Partners could throw at us unawares while we are here," he said looking around the lobby of Wolfram & Hart, the consequences of their actions of the past year sinking in fully. Everyone nodded as Gunn's shoulders dropped slightly.

"Well, shit…"

**O:X:O:X:O:X:O:X:O:X:O:X:O:X:O**

**_A/N – Well, I know that was really short, but I thought I'd reward all the reviewers I mentioned above with a small present before the holidays. This little section helped me to tie it all together in my head and I think the plot may finally be rolling towards the end. All we need now is some action, baby! Along with some A/C loving, and quite possibly some B/S acknowledgment… and others? We'll see… if something jumps into my head, I'll write it. Anyways, let me know what you think… Please!_**


	19. Part XIX

**A/N – Sorry all, but I'm honestly going to try to cut back on my author's notes and thank you's (I can hear the boos and hisses already!)… There are so many that the thanks are getting as long as my story! Not to mention, it takes time to update them after each review I get. So… I want to thank everyone that has reviewed this last time around. Anne, Angelus, Morrigan, Yashoda, DDuck, Imzadi, Genevieve719, Angel-cordy, Steffi, Bella7, The Blue Faerie, Trysta… I appreciate your undying support of this story to a degree that's almost mind-boggling. Please keep on reviewing… I love to hear from each and every reader, whether they like this or not. And occasionally, you may see epic thanks if I'm moved enough to do such things (wink, wink :P). So, without further ado… here's the next installment. Let me know how you like it!**

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The tightness that had been in Cordelia's chest since the moment she'd woken up was starting to recede a bit the closer she walked to the Hyperion. But… she couldn't help the little bit of apprehension as well. There were so many memories held within that aged hotel and she wondered at how everyone was going to react as they walked in those doors. Angel walked a few paces ahead of her and Cordelia quickened her stride so she could grab a hold of his hand. Startled, the vampire looked over at her and then looked down at their interlocked fingers. When he looked back up at her, her dark eyes had a look in them that dared him to let go. Instead of taking her dare, he squeezed her hand and pulled her closer to him as he reached out to open the door.

Angel pushed the door and it squeaked from the lack of use as the group stared into the darkened lobby. Cordelia drew in a breath and walked carefully into the Hyperion, pulling Angel in behind her. The dust that covered the floor and the spider webs that hung from every conceivable object were glaring testaments to the hotel's abandoned status. Cordelia's hand ran over the banister and it came away with quite the layer of grime. She turned to look at the rest of the gang with a disgusted look.

"Well… I, for one, am glad this place is actually still here… When I talked about it earlier, I was afraid that you all would tell me you sold it or something," she said as she shook her hand free of the dust. Wesley looked around the hotel in a reflective awe.

"To be truthful, Cordelia, I haven't really given this place all that much thought," he said. Fred shook her head in agreement.

"Me neither…" she said. Gunn looked a bit abashed.

"Well… to be honest, it was the next item on the 'for sale' docket," he said, his eyes going nervously to the ground. Cordelia turned to look at him, hands on hips and a frown on her face.

"Oh? And what had been the first?" she asked, although she had a horrible, sneaky suspicion she knew what it was. There was an uncomfortable silence for a moment, before Angel spoke.

"Your apartment," he said. Cordelia didn't know whether to be hurt, angry, confused… so she decided on all three.

"My _apartment_? And where, pray tell, did you expect me to live when I woke up? At Evil'R'Us?" she asked. Again, silence.

"Oh yes," she continued. "I forget… you all didn't _expect_ me to wake up, did you?" This time everyone looked anywhere but at her. The hurt wasn't as blaringly painful as it had been before, but it still stung to be faced with the truth time and time again.

"Cordy…" Angel started, but she held up a hand.

"Forget it," she sighed. "I know what happened. I know the 'whys' and 'wherefors'… Let's just get this place cleaned up so that we have some place to actually do some research, since we all know how much we enjoy that part of the 'Save the World' tour." Taking advantage of Cordelia's willingness to not pursue the subject any more, and their own desperation to ease their own guilt, everyone sprung to life and headed towards the offices and the basement to see what they could use to make their old headquarters spotless once again.

x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x

It was close to three hours later that the hotel lobby looked anywhere near the grand hotel it had once been. Everyone was starting to convene back in the office area as they stretched and rubbed sore muscles from the hours upon hours of scrubbing, scraping and whatever else had been required of them. They all stood around the large, newly polished oak desk with refreshments in hand and completely silent. Fred was the first to break.

"I'm so sorry, you guys…" she said, setting her taco that Lorne had been kind enough to procure for her down and looking at each of her friends. Three hours of being bombarded with memories that she'd once forgotten and memories she'd forgotten for her own benefit made the slight Texan realize all that had happened in the past year. "I'm sorry that I forgot, I'm sorry that I kept forgetting, and I'm sorry that I wasn't strong enough to do anything _but_ forget…" Wes cleared his throat.

"We all forgot. We all did things we are… _ashamed_ of… We all have equal parts of the blame," he said. "If I hadn't taken Conner, none of this would have ever happened…" Cordelia set her coffee down next to Fred's taco.

"If I hadn't been stupid enough to let the freaking Senior Partners into my head on my birthday, none of this would have ever happened," she said.

"Well…" Gunn started, "I'm sorry that I…"

"Well, I'm sorry I ever became a vampire," Angel's voice broke in, his face hard and his voice even harder. "Then I would have never would have become Angelus, never would have become Angel, never would have come here and met you all, and never would have ultimately caused all this to happen." Everyone's eyes widened, but no one said anything. Angel stood up straight and uncrossed his arms.

"What is it we are trying to do here? Are we going to go back over every moment of the past and try to absolve ourselves? We had no way of knowing where everything was going to take us. We had no idea at how involved the Senior Partners would become in shaping this moment and we certainly had no goddamn idea that they could even _do_ such a thing. So… let's not waste time on what we can't change," he said harshly. Lorne shifted in his chair slightly as he cleared his throat.

"Angelkins is right, kiddies. We've got bigger fish to fry. We all know where our paths have led. If we'd stayed those paths, I doubt there would be a world anymore. The Powers have intervened enough to show us the way. Now, the tough stuff is up to us. We need to find a way to get those filthy Senior Partners out of our lives for good. Because if we don't, the past is going to rule the future. We've got to check our baggage at the door, boys and girls, because we need to come together as a team and do what we do best. It's why the Senior Partners did what they did anyways… they are afraid of us and what we do when we _are_ a team," he said. There were ghosts of smiles on all their faces as they realized that the green demon was right.

"Lorne is correct," Wes said. "There was a reason behind all of this and now we've broken out of their mold. Let's get our books…"

"I'll go check the basement for weapons," Angel told everyone.

"I'll go check to rooms to see what books have been left here," Fred said, catching the sudden need for action.

"Gunn, you and Wes will have to head back over to Wolfram Hart. Get the texts that we need," Cordelia instructed. The two men nodded. "I'll go help Fred look around the place to see what we all left here. Spike and Conner can help us." The ghost and the boy looked at each other questioningly.

"Looks like we're not chopped liver after all, mate… we're on search and rescue," Spike said with a roll of his eyes. Buffy let out a snort.

"You could just sit quietly," she said. Spike let out a snort of his own.

"Like that's bloody likely," he said, causing all in the room to smile. The mood in the room sufficiently lightened, Cordelia clapped her hands in a way reminiscent of her cheerleader past.

"Let's get ready to kick some baddie ass," she said as she swept out of the room. Angel followed in her wake, with everyone else doing the same.

"Well… off we go," Lorne said, staying pointedly seated. Gunn was the last to leave the room as he searched for where he'd put his stuff.

"They were _your_ pretty words that jump started the gung-ho gang and now you're just sitting there," Gunn said as he picked up his axe.

"My well of inspiration has run dry…" the demon said as he stood.

"I never would have thought you to be a speech giver…" Gunn said as he clasped a hand on Lorne's shoulder. The demon let out a breath as he stood up and watched everyone leave the room.

"Yeah, well, just call me Braveheart… Just don't expect face paint… the blue would clash with my new suit," he said. Gunn laughed as he stood and followed the gang.

"Or your face…" he shot back over his shoulder. Lorne let out a chuckle as he straightened his tie and went to join in the ragtag missions

x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x

"How long do you think they're going to keep having their little bleeding heart sessions? They tend to be bloody downers, for the most part," Spike asked the blond next to him as they watched the group talk amongst themselves preparing to set off on their assigned tasks. Buffy let a stake twist through her fingers as she slouched down onto the lobby couch.

"They've got things to sort out that don't include us, Spike," she said simply. Spike let out a snort.

"I'm sorry, you're sorry, we're all sorry… even that little cockroach from earlier is sorry… Haven't we things to do? Evil plots to foil? Baddies to thwart?" he asked.

"The end of the world's not going anywhere just yet. And if we're all at each others throats or avoiding each other like the plague, the end of the world will be the end of us… _then_ the world…" she said, not looking at the ghost. Spike watched her for a second.

"Right… well then… are we just going to continue with the small talk, then?" he asked.

"What are you talking about, Spike?" she asked, turning her tired blue-green eyes to him.

"Well, we've been at each other's throats for as long as I can remember. If there's a spring cleaning going on, we should probably clean out a few of our own closets…" he said. Buffy rolled her eyes, but couldn't help the small smile that crossed her face at his ridiculously lame metaphor.

"By all means, air your grievances…" she invited.

"I've got no problem with anything, but is seems that _you_ have some hang ups with being around me," he said, punctuating his speech by poking at her shoulder. Both of their jaws dropped as his finger connected causing Buffy to stumble slightly at the unexpected pressure.

"Well bloody hell… I can touch people. Why didn't I know I could touch people?" he asked. Buffy could only watch as he reached forward and poked her shoulder again.

"I wonder what this means," she said finally.

"It means I'm bloody well human again," he said with a smile alighting his eyes.

"Let's not get all jumpy with the conclusions," Buffy said.

"What's not to get jumpy about?" he asked, standing up. His hand snuck out to snatch the stake Buffy had been tossing around. His hand went right through it.

"There goes your 'human' theory," Buffy said. Spike frowned and concentrated harder before trying again. His hand went through the wood once more.

"Bloody hell," he said. "I could do that earlier. I wielded a sodding weapon. _You_ saw it…" Buffy watched as Spike start to pace angrily.

"Maybe it was a one-time deal," she said. The ghost spun to give her his usual pointed look.

"They wouldn't do that," he said. Buffy frowned.

"Who?"

"I don't bloody well know! The Senior Partners and the Powers That Be seem to be all interchangeable as of late… could be either one," he said.

"I don't see the Powers making all this a one-time deal. And I don't see why the Senior Partners would give you a weapon and then say 'oops, never mind'. They don't seem the type," she commented.

"Then why could I touch you?" he asked. Buffy shrugged and was about to say something until a commotion broke her thoughts.

Their heads both turned quickly to see the group, minus Gunn, Wes and Cordelia, convening in the stairwell. Spike smirked as he made his way towards the willowy Texan now making her way towards them.

"Hello, luv… where are you off to?" he asked charmingly. Fred gave him a look.

"To do the job I was given. And if I'm not mistaken, I think Cordy ordered you to help," she said. Spike grinned shamelessly.

"Anything to help a lovely lady such as yourself," he said, moving to put an arm around her slim shoulders. Only Spike and Buffy were surprised when his arm went right through her. The brunette just gave him an arched look.

"You're a loony," she said before she made her way towards the stairs, dust cloth in hand. Buffy and Spike looked at each other again.

"Maybe she's a fluke?" the Slayer suggested. For the next few moments, Spike made his way around the room and subtly experimented with all the others, failing miserably in each attempt. He let out a disappointed sigh, but perked up when he saw a dark head entering the lobby again.

"Granddad!" Spike suddenly said, opening his arms wide and heading towards Angel in a last ditch effort to prove that he and Buffy weren't going mad. Angel's eyes widened at the blond's approach and he held up his hands.

"Don't come near me, Spike, or I'll have you exorcised quicker than you can say 'boo'," he said with a dark look. Spike sneered, but dropped his arms.

"Granddad made a funny. The world _is_ ending," he said in a way that resembled a pout. Angel glared at him before he made his way to the weapons cabinet. Spike sat down next to Buffy again and succeeded in prodding her shoulder roughly.

"Looks like you're the fluke, luv," he said. Buffy groaned and put her head in her hands.

"Great, just what I need," she said. Her impending diatribe of woe was interrupted.

"We got books!" Cordelia crowed in triumph as she came down the stairs. "They were squirreled away in the room Wes usually used… Let's get to work! Maybe we can get a few steps a head before Wes and Gunn get back with more books." Buffy looked at Spike and then looked to where Angel, Conner, Cordelia, Fred and Lorne all circled around the front desk with books being piled in front of them.

"Looks like we'll have to figure this one out later. And do me a favor, keep your big mouth shut about this until we need to tell," she said. Spike smirked.

"The 'need to know' hubbub makes me feel all important like," he said. Buffy pinched the bridge of her nose for a second.

"How 'bout you just keep your big mouth shut?" she suggested. Spike, usually ever-so-contradictory, just gave her a small smile and waved for her to go join the gang in their investigative pursuits.

x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x

He watched them all scramble around to try to solve this end of the world thing. End of the world… it didn't seem as catastrophic as he would have imagined it to be. Yesterday, he probably would have screamed like the little girl his brother's usually claimed he was.

It was strange, really, being in this place. He wasn't supposed to remember it, but he did. Conner let out a breath as he paced just out of earshot of 'the gang'. Every now and then, he would cast a glance at the group. Killing that monk earlier had awoken something in him that he really couldn't put a name to. And if Conner were really honest with himself, it had awoken earlier, he just hadn't noticed it yet. Every time he looked at his group of 'saviors' he felt the anger come back. It was the anger that he had felt in that flash of life earlier that day. It had been that pain… It took everything in him at times to keep from running over to that cabinet with all the weapons and take each and every one of them out. Yet, thought of his parents, of his sister and brothers, of his friends in this life kept him from doing that. One of these lives was his, and it would all become clear if he just waited. All he had to do was mask the growing hate. With that thought, Conner turned to watch the one they called a 'vampire'. And he watched the beautiful woman that was always at his side. A flare of anger and hatred almost seared him as a moment where she _hadn't_ been by the vampire's side flashed before his eyes.

"Hey, Conner!" that same woman called to him. Conner turned to see everyone looking at him.

"Yeah?" he asked as he approached. The small one – Fred? – put her hand on him arm and he resisted the urge to shrug it off.

"We were wondering if you remember if those monks said anything to you when they took your blood," she said. The monks? Oh… the monks… the ones he _didn't_ kill…

"No, I don't think they did," he said. Cordelia slumped down in her chair and put her chin in her hand.

"Well, damn. Not a single lead in that department except for the fact that they borrowed his blood without a by-your-leave…" she muttered unhappily. The one with the glasses cleared his throat.

"Saving the world isn't supposed to be easy, Cordelia," he said. Cordelia rolled her eyes.

"Oh if only they had cliff notes…" she bemoaned. Wes chuckled.

"The only thing we have at the moment is that they needed Conner's blood and that there's a reference to the Destroyer. We'll have to start there and dig whatever we can out of it," he said. Everyone nodded. Conner shifted on his feet and looked at his watch.

"I really need to get home. I told my parents I'd be studying, and if I'm any later they will start to look for me," he said. A look of disappointment crossed the vampire's face, but Conner only smiled inwardly at it.

"We'll give you a lift home," he said before Cordelia drew him away to speak to him. Conner went to pick up his things, but focused his hearing on the couple.

"… make sure he's safe," Cordelia finished. Out of the corner of his eye, Conner saw the vampire nod.

"I'll take the first watch. At dawn, Gunn or Wes will have to relieve me," he said. Cordelia nodded.

"I'm coming with you," she said as she started to go get her coat. The vampire held her back gently.

"No, Cor, I want you to stay here where it's safe. They're after Conner, you'd just be in the middle of it," he said. She reached up and caressed his cheek.

"I'm safer with you, Angel," she said simply. Conner made a face at that statement and turned away when the two leaned it to share a kiss. There were more words, but he blocked them out as he righted his school bag and picked up his coat.

"We're ready to go," Gunn said, tossing a set of keys in his hand. The vampire held out his hand.

"Let's go," he said. Gunn rolled his eyes.

"Man, it's just a car…" he said.

"Yeah, _my_ car," the vampire said back. The black man tossed the keys to him as they began to file towards the door.

"Wes, you, Fred, Spike and Buffy get to work on those texts. Gunn, Cordy and I will take Conner… home… we'll set up a look-out rotation when I get back," he said. Wes nodded, already deep into a book. The vampire then looked to Conner.

"Let's go," he said. Conner wanted to sneer at the man's back, but Cordelia wrapped her arm through his and was guiding him to the door. He wasn't sure which was worse… being baby-sat by this bunch or being almost kidnapped by fanatical monks. With a quick breath, the teenager resolved for the second time that night to be patient. For what, though, he wasn't exactly sure…

* * *

**A/N2: Well, some of that was filler, some of that was important, and most of it didn't sit well with me. I do want to thank Bella7 for taking the time to read through it before I posted it. She thought it was fine, so I'm taking her word as gospel. She spent enough time reading the whole thing beginning to end that I think I'll trust her… :) Anyways, all… please let me know what you think. The next chapter should have a bit more meat to it, hopefully. My muse has been either on vacation or just plain lazy as of late. We're getting there, folks… we're getting there. Slow but sure wins the race… Til then, PLEASE review. Thanks!**


	20. Part XX

**A/N: Thanks to Imzadi, Bella7, angel-cordy, and Genevieve719 for the lovely reviews! Where'd everyone else go:P Kidding… enjoy!**

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

Wes stifled a yawn as he turned the page. The sun was now up, but for all Wes had ventured outside of the office he wouldn't have known it if Cordelia hadn't come in with lunch for him.

"You need to go sleep, Wes, before you fall over," she said, her voice tinged with worry. Wes smiled, appreciation for her worry apparent on his face.

"I'll sleep when I find something," he told her.

"Wes, the books will still be here later," she said, laying the haphazard sandwich down in front of him.

"Yes, that may be. But the world may not be, Cordy. We don't know how much time we have," he said with a sigh. The young woman knelt down next to him.

"I've got a feeling that the world isn't going to end tomorrow. I may not be secretary to the Powers anymore, but I think you can trust me on this," she said. Wes took a second to wipe off his glasses before laid them on the table and sat back in his chair.

"We'll need a _little_ more than intuition to keep me from worrying, even though I _do_ trust your instincts more than most," he said, an exhausted smile accompanying his last words. Cordelia looked over the stack of books the ex-Watcher had open and the multitude of papers he had scattered about.

"Fine then. Tell me what you've got, go take a nap and leave me to continue where you left off. Then, when you are slightly more rested, come back with fresh eyes and take control again," she said. Wes stared at her for a second, gauging her own exhaustion. The girl looked ragged, as they all surely did after a couple of sleepless nights, but she looked more rested than she had before.

"Okay, Cordy. If I won't hear the end of it, I'll take your advice. A short nap, mind you, may do me good," he said. Cordelia smiled at him and laid her hand over his.

"I don't care if you just close your eyes for an hour, Wes, but you need to close your eyes. Otherwise you'll drive yourself crazy," she said. Wes smiled back as he nodded.

"Well… all I seem to find in both texts besides the reference to blood is a reference to soul. Now, I know that translation isn't your forte, but if you could perhaps start to chip away at the words of this it will give me a head start when I come back to it," he said. He took the paper on which he had copied a verse-like passage and handed it to the girl.

"Your request is my command," she said with a quick salute. Then, she pointed towards the door. "Now, go sleep."

"Your command is my command," he shot back to her before standing and stretching. Cordelia quickly took his place at the desk and ruffled through some of his papers.

"On your way out, could you shake Fred and Lorne awake? If I have to suffer through translations, those sleepy-heads do too," she said. Wes gave her a smile before he went to do what he was bid.

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

It was close to three hours later and Cordelia was still paging through books. Rather than sulkily doing so, though, she did so with a sense of accomplishment. She'd gone online after an hour of searching through dusty books and found an answer to her translation in twenty minutes.

_Dark with dark_

_Light with light_

_Unite together_

_Will of the sight_

_Bringer of ends_

_Must not see them unite_

Now, whatever that meant, she had no clue whatsoever… hence, the paging through dusty books. The only thing in the passage that stuck out to her, however abstract, was teamwork. But, she also knew that nothing was ever that simple. Not for the end-all, be-all apocalypse as of late.

"How is the translation coming?" Wes' slightly groggy voice interrupted. Cordelia turned in her chair to look at him.

"Oh, it came, it saw, I conquered," she said. "Fred and Lorne were no help. Fred kept nodding off so I sent her to bed. And Lorne, well… he's Lorne. I sent him to help Gunn with the weapons or whatever. And might I say I am much happier to see Gunn back in every day clothes? It was kinda wiggy seeing him in a suit, or what was left of one…" Wes smiled as he took the chair across from her.

"Yes, well… Wolfram Hart did a number on him, on all of us. I didn't realize how much like the old Charles Gunn he wasn't. It's good to be back home again," he said. Cordelia let out a sigh.

"Yes, it is…" she said with a smile.

"May I see the translation?" he asked. Cordelia handed it to him.

"Here ya go, oh Einstein of the ghouly goodness," she said. Wes took the paper from her and read over the words.

"How did you get that so quickly?" Wes asked her as he rubbed his eyes to wake himself fully. Cordelia gave him a look as she handed the paper to him.

"I _know_ that wasn't a slight against my wonderfully amazing researching skills but just lack of sleep talking. Anyway, isn't it amazing what you can find on the Internet?" she asked with a shrug of her shoulders. Wes' eyes went wider than normal.

"You received this translation from the Internet?" he asked, incredulous.

"Roll yourself out of the stone age for a minute or two and plug into the twenty-first century, you can find anything with the click of a button. If you can find out how to build a bomb, why not have translations to dark, evil texts that predict the world ending?" she asked. Wes looked over the words once more.

"Actually, the text itself isn't dark and evil. It is merely a guide, a prophetic medium in which the end of the world is merely mentioned…" he corrected her, his eyes not leaving the passage. Cordelia let out a 'pfft' with a roll of her eyes.

"To-may-to, to-ma-to, buddy," she said, causing him to crack a smile. "Should we show that to Angel?"

"Don't wake him yet. Let me cross reference a few words and then we shall inform the crew," he said as he selected a word and looked it up in one of the other texts.

"The World Wide Web knows all, Wes. No need to worry about the translation. The End Is Here dot com pays people to be right about this stuff…" she said. Wes looked up, his finger marking his spot.

"I've been wrong in the past, Cordelia. Horribly wrong. I'd prefer to make sure this is definite than to run off on something and it be not entirely correct," he said, a solemn look on his face. Cordelia didn't know whether to flush in horror at her careless words or to pale in understanding, so instead she decided on a sick feeling in her stomach.

"I'm sorry," she said. "Take as much time as you need…" Rather than dredge up the hideous past they were all attempting fairly successfully to move past, she left Wes to his double-checking.

As she walked out of the office she saw Angel descending the stairs.

"Good morning," she said brightly, heading over to him. When he saw her he smiled.

"How's everything down here?" he asked as he took her hand. Cordelia's eyes roamed over the empty lobby.

"Well, Wes and I have made some headway on the texts. Not much, but it could be something. Buffy and Spike went to take over watch from Gunn earlier. Gunn is now with Lorne doing who knows what, and Fred is napping. And Wes is, as usual, entombing himself in the office with books, books and more books," she said. Angel sat down in one of the chairs and pulled Cordelia into his lap, her head resting back on his shoulder. They sat like that for a few quiet moments, but as usual, a few quiet moments were all they were allowed.

Just as Wesley's 'Eureka' rang through the lobby, the hotel doors burst open and a ragged looking Buffy was helped through the door by Spike. Cordelia stood quickly as she took in the Slayer and her companion, but Angel stood up at a slower pace, taking in the significance of the situation. Neither one had a chance to say anything before Wes bound into the room with a gleam in his eye and a small smile on his face.

"I think I may have figured it out… well, part of it out, anyway," he said, adjusting his glasses. He fell silent when he took in Buffy's appearance. "But you go first…"

"How generous," Spike spat out as he helped the blond girl sit down.

"What happened?" Cordelia asked as she knelt in front of the Slayer.

"What didn't happen, you mean?" she said, propping her foot up on the couch. "Spike had a vision…"

"But before that, the nipper broke out," Spike said with a growl. "Fat lot of thanks we got too, trying to keep his skinny arse out of trouble…" This time Angel let out a growl.

"What do you mean 'broke out'? Where did Conner go?" he demanded.

"We don't know. We were minding our bleeding business and then all of a sudden we had fists in our faces. Buffy put up a good fight, but the kid was too much for her…" he said.

"We have no clue as to where he went," Buffy said, looking at Angel apologetically. Angel didn't say anything as he crossed his arms.

"And the vision?" he asked. Spike swallowed.

"I saw the kid in it. It's about what's coming… He was angry and he was killing. He was in some sort of chamber, not sure where. There were markings on the walls, there were green flames and there were voices. I wasn't shown who they were. The Powers tried to show me, but it was blocked. These Senior Partners are more powerful than ever…" he said. Everyone was silent as they tried to think over the implications. Wes turned to Cordelia.

"What was that about the world not ending tomorrow?" he asked. Cordelia crossed her arms and raised a brow.

"I never said that someone wasn't going to try. I just said that I have a feeling it wasn't going to end. Call it optimism," she said tartly.

"What's happened?" Fred's voice called as she ran down the stairs. "I'm so sorry I fell asleep…"

"It's okay, Fred. You needed it," Cordelia reassured her. Just as Wes was about to launch into an explanation of his own, Lorne and Gunn emerged from the basement.

"I thought I heard a 'eureka' echo across the ages," Lorne said.

"What I was going to say before I was interrupted was that I think it would be best if we all returned to the office. I've taken the liberty of creating a flowchart," Wes said before heading in that very direction. Gunn looked at Angel, bemuse.

"English made a flowchart," he said.

"Don't mock the flowchart. I like flowcharts," Fred said before following Wes and Cordelia who were already talking animatedly about the subject.

As everyone found a seat or a place to stand, Wes pulled out his easel. On the paper he had written words in a circular arrangement, connecting each with an arrow.

"Okay, I've tried to get as much as I could possibly could on here…" he said before pointing to the first word 'memory'. "This sequence of events was put into motion long before this, but for our ultimate purposes it all really started at the alteration of our memories – Spike and Buffy excluded, of course. It led to the Powers stepping in by bringing Cordy back, making Spike seer, and Lindsey searching out Buffy. This led to the finding of the text we now have and finding out that Conner's blood would call the Senior Partners. After researching the word soul within selected passages I have found that it all links back to memory…" The gang watched as Wes pointed to and explained each word on his chart.

"Okay, so what does this all mean?" Cordelia asked.

"Well… it involves you, Cordelia… and Angel, Spike and Buffy. It involves _your_ souls," he said without preamble. He then flipped the page on his chart and everyone saw the words to Cordelia's translation.

"Our souls?" Buffy asked, confused.

"Yes. You see, Conner's memory has been reintroduced to him. The Senior Partners are taking full advantage of the boy's confusion. He is slowly slipping back into the boy he was before the Partners had altered reality. Wolfram Hart will capitalize on those prior feelings. We are all now well aware of what drove Angel to alter reality. Conner was slowly becoming more and more unhinged as time went by. I'm afraid his destiny would not have been satisfied by merely killing a handful of people…" the ex-Watcher said.

"Are you saying that the altered reality was a good thing?" Gunn asked. Wes gave Angel a quick glance. The vampire's mood was quickly becoming dark.

"No. I am not saying anything of the sort. But what it did was delay the inevitable. That in itself is a good thing. At the time we were all distracted by what happened in the past, what happened to Cordelia and what had happened to Conner… the end of the world would have come and we would never have known the difference. The altered reality gave us a fighting chance whether it was good idea or not," Wes clarified. Angel shifted on his feet.

"It was a good idea at the time," he said.

"Yes, I am sure it was. But if the Powers hadn't stepped in, the world _would_ be over. The Senior Partners had each of us where they wanted us. And the best part was they had Angel pulling the strings. So who was going to notice a little behind the scenes 'end of the world' ploy? Especially since Angel thought he knew everything that was going on inside Wolfram Hart…" Wes said without a hint of reproach.

"Damn. Shoulda given those evil bastards a little more credit," Gunn grumbled.

"Yes, we should have…" Cordelia held up her hand to stop whatever was going to come next.

"Okay, so what does this have to do with our souls?" she asked while gesturing to Angel, Spike, Buffy and herself. Wes cleared his throat again.

"Your souls have the power to stop Conner. I've yet to fully translate the spell, but it will take your souls to bring Conner's back," he said with certainty.

"So, you're saying that Conner is bent on destroying the world and the four of us have to give our souls in order to stop it from happening?" Cordelia said, eyes just as wide as Buffy's. Wes shook his head.

"No, not precisely…" he said. Angel stepped up to the desk and leaned on it.

"You'd better tell us… _precisely_…" he said. Wes cleared his throat but was otherwise un-intimidated.

"It is not _Conner_ who is bent on destroying the world, but rather the Senior Partners… which is not in the least bit surprising. Conner is not referred to as the Destroyer by coincidence or by the lack of a better title and the Partners have known this. His power could destroy the world if it is unleashed in the manner Wolfram Hart hope it to be. _But_ if we can harness that power by means I am as yet uncertain about we could use it to destroy the Senior Partner once and for all," Wes said. It took a second for everyone to absorb the ex-Watcher's words.

"But what about that soul part?" Cordelia asked. Wes shifted in his seat.

"As I said, I am not entirely certain about that part just yet. I've more research to do. But, from what I can gather, it will require four souls – two dark and two light according to the passage. These souls are meant to bring Conner back. From what Spike's vision imparted to us, it would seem that the Senior Partners have lured him to their clutches… or they will attempt to and succeed," he said. Again there was silence as each person came to their own conclusion.

"We've got to find Conner… now," Angel said suddenly, breaking from the group and heading into the lobby to find a weapon. Cordelia took off after him.

"I'm coming with," she said, going to the weapon's cabinet.

"No," Angel said. When Cordelia turned to glare at him, he held up a hand. "I need you here in case Conner comes here." Cordelia's jaw tightened perceptively, but she nodded.

"What if he _has_ gone off the deep end? Cordy's not going to be much match for him," Spike commented. Angel didn't look away from the brunette.

"That's why you and Buffy are staying here," he said. "Gunn, you're with me. Wes, Lorne, Fred - I need to you stick around to figure out Spike's vision and find that spell. The when and where… and we're going to need it quickly." In the flurry of sudden action, no one had heard the door open.

"You're going to need more help than you think," a voice said. Everyone turned to watch Lindsey walk down the steps to the lobby. "I'm not the only lawyer in town…"

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

He hated them all. They all had brought him to this. He had two lives and he hated everything about each one of them. His existence was shattered pieces and he didn't know how to put them back together. With a kick he sent the monk standing guard flying down the stairs. He took the dropped sword and slowly followed. Without a flinch or a moment's hesitation he killed the man on the floor. The violence felt good. With that, he stepped into the large room and quickly dispatched the two other monks without a blink. Alone now, he studied his surroundings. The room was empty save for a burning fire in the middle of the space. He stepped closer to it to see where, exactly, it was coming from.

Without warning the flames flared up with a flash of green. Conner quickly turned, covering his face from the light.

"The prodigal son returns," a voice said. "We've been waiting for you…" Conner whirled around and uncovered his face to see a figure step out of the flames, not a mark on them.

"Who are you?" Conner asked the figure warily.

"I'm your worst nightmare," the figure said. Conner sneered.

"I don't have nightmares," he said. The figure smiled.

"Your whole life is a nightmare. But we're going to fix that."

"Who's we?" Conner asked.

"The Senior Partners and myself… and you," the figure stepped forward. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Conner."

"You know who I am, but who are you?" he asked, stepping back from her approach and holding his sword up between them.

"I'm Lilah Morgan."

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**A/N2: grin**


	21. Part XXI

**A/N: Thanks, everyone, for the reviews (especially Steffi for the _exceptionally_ sweet note – it warmed my heart so much). I'm glad you all liked the last chapter. IMO it's probably _one_ of my favorites. I'll have to read through the rest of my stuff to tell you which one's best, but that last one was fun. Anyways, enjoy this next part… let me know if you don't! And if you do, of course:)**

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

"So, who's who in the whole soul-swap circus?" Cordelia asked, sitting down next to Wes. The ex-Watcher let out a sigh.

"I'm not completely sure as to what the specifics are. It calls for two dark souls and two light souls. That small distinguishing characteristic between you four could end up being very important," he said, sitting back in his chair and rubbing the bridge of his nose.

"Well… two dark, duh. Angel and Spike. Angelus and William the Bloody. They're both vampires – or in Spike's case, _was_ a vampire. Two light… again, duh. I used to be a Seer and Buffy's the Slayer…" she said.

"I don't think it's going to be that simple. Each of you could go either way, really. Angel and Spike are certainly candidates for the 'dark soul' being who they were in the past. But Angel is also a warrior for the Powers and Spike willingly searched out a soul. You, in turn, had a brush with the dark side in both carrying demon progeny and being taken over by a dark being. Buffy herself was brought back by dark magic after she'd died and gone to heaven. It's not as cut and dry as you might think," he said. Cordelia put her head in her hand dejectedly.

"Nothing's ever easy. Let me guess… more research?" she asked. Wes nodded. Cordelia picked up a book. "And thanks, by the way, for bringing up the long-repressed and nearly forgotten past. My therapist is going to thank you…" Wes smiled slightly.

"You don't have a therapist," he said. Cordelia rolled her eyes.

"Fine. _Angel_ is going to thank you because I'm going to have to bitch about it to him," she said. This time Wes chuckled.

"You could always just repress it again," he said. She leveled him with her 'look'.

"If we're not careful, we're all going to become a bunch of brooders with all the repressing that's taken place over the years," she said.

"Yes, well, we've spent almost five years in Angel's employ or something like it. It's only natural that we have adopted some of his tendencies," he commented. Cordelia smiled but remained quiet for a moment.

"So… how 'bout the situation with Conner? What do you think is going on, really? What do you think's going to happen?" she asked finally. Wes was silent as he thought over his words.

"This situation is graver that we could possibly imagine I'm afraid. The fate of the world rests on the soul spell that I still know next to nothing about. All I know is that one of the words I can translate in conjunction to 'soul' is 'sacrifice'…" he said. Cordelia looked at the words on the page in front of her but she didn't read them.

"So… what you're saying but not really saying is that you think that in order to save the world, there must be the sacrifice of a soul… or maybe all of our souls," she said. Wes shook his head.

"I didn't say that," he said. Cordelia let out a breath.

"But it was what you were thinking," she said. The two fell silent. Wes shifted in his seat and closed the book that sat in front of him.

"There is a lot more that I need to read up on, Cordelia. I don't suspect this ritual to be a suicide mission. And if that _is_ what it calls for, then we shall find a way around it if I have to read through every book on this planet," the Englishman said seriously. Cordelia smiled gratefully at him.

"I know that Wes," she reassured him. _Sacrifice_… she thought. _Maybe this is what the Powers intended for me all along... _"Do you think they'll find Conner?" Wes shrugged his shoulders at her question.

"I'd like to say they will. Angel was smart to take both Lorne and Lindsey with him," he said.

"Can we trust Lindsey?" she asked. Again, Wes shrugged.

"He seems genuine. So far, everything he's told us and warned us about is true. We have yet to ascertain whether… Lilah… is truly back, but if Lindsey's lied to us Lorne would be the one to know," the ex-Watcher said, stumbling only slightly at the name of the woman he'd tried to save from herself. Just as he'd failed with Conner, he'd failed to save her as well… If she were back, she'd be instrumental in coercing young Conner back to his ways of emotional destruction. He wouldn't be surprised if Lilah had helped to orchestrate all of this from the beginning, playing everyone at Angel Investigations – himself mostly – for fools.

"Dead just isn't dead these days, is it?" Cordelia asked, breaking Wes' reverie. "They must be running a special… die once, get your second death free…" The Englishman smiled at her attempt at a joke.

"Yes, well… after everything we've been through and seen, I think that it's been proven time and time again that death never really is the end," he said. Cordelia let her arm give a dismissing wave.

"Yeah, yeah. Thank you, Sunnyhell, for your numerous life lessons…" she said, feeling only a small pang at the fact that Sunnydale now didn't exist except for a crater in the ground. Shaking the thought away, Cordelia picked up a book.

"Okay, more research. You'd think I didn't just spend hours upon hours doing just that already," she said with a sigh.

"Welcome to my world," Wes said, already hunched over a book and writing down possible theories. Cordelia watched as he worked.

"Yes, but books are your life. You are 'one' with the books. I, on the other hand, would like to be 'one' with those magazines over there. Has it occurred to you that, due to the latest of my many mystical comas, I have fallen behind on who's wearing what and who's _doing_ what?" she asked. Wes gave a non-committal sound as he continued to write.

"Are you listening to me, or have you gone off to your Neverland of words and prophecies?" Cordelia asked. Again, Wes gave a non-committal sound.

"Fine… don't talk to me…" she huffed before turning back to her book, eyeing a magazine out of the corner of her eye.

_Two hours later…_

"I think I've got it…" Wes said after a long couple of hours, a weary smile coming over his face. Cordelia sat up straight in her chair, throwing the magazine she'd succumbed to aside, as she watched him make his final notes. With a look of triumph, Wes held the piece of paper up.

"The spell?" Cordelia asked. He nodded.

"We've got the spell and most of the specifics. Now, all we need are the people of which it speaks," he said. "I will, of course, have to re-check everything just to make sure. But I'm pretty sure I've got it…" Cordelia let out a small squeal as she jumped up from her chair and went to hug the man.

"In the ever-so-poetic words of Fred… AI, a gazillion and one. Apocalypse… well… _one_, since it's gotten its claws into Conner," she said with a shrug of a shoulder.

"Well, with this spell, the Senior Partners won't have Conner for long… in fact…" Wes stopped talking suddenly. Something didn't feel right. Carefully, he folded his notes and put them into his pocket. Cordelia gave him a look.

"Are you alright, Wes? You look like you've seen a ghost – and not of the annoying Spike type…" she said.

"Cordelia," Wes said, his eyes scanning the lobby. "… get to the basement… the sewers…"

"What are…" Cordelia asked him just as the front door of the hotel burst open. She and Wes shared a look before turning back to the doors. "Talk about timing…" The two of them stood quickly about to make for the weapons cabinet. The two of them made it only a step before each of them was hit with whatever the intruders had shot them with.

"Wesley," Cordelia said weakly as her vision became blurry and she wavered where she stood.

"Conner… trap…" Wes muttered as he reached out to steady both himself and Cordelia, but he missed falling into a heap on the floor. Everything went dark and he didn't even hear Cordelia's body hit the floor.

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

"This looks like what Spike described from his vision…" Lorne said from behind the three others.

"Are you sure this is the place that Spike saw?" Gunn asked. "Don't get me wrong, but how do we know that he's reliable in the vision department?" Angel looked down the dark stairway with a little bit of trepidation. This was the sixth place they'd been in two hours. They couldn't afford to be wrong any more after this. Each minute that passed took Conner deeper into the clutches of Wolfram Hart.

"Well, let's ask one tool of the Powers if the other tool of the Powers is real…" the vampire said, looking to Lindsey. The ex-lawyer smiled and shrugged his shoulders.

"If you're looking for validity to the visions, you're asking the wrong guy," he said. Angel, Gunn and Lindsey all looked to Lorne.

"Hey… you know that my 'follow the pied piper' record hasn't exactly been stellar. We've been bamboozled before, kiddies, and I was none the wiser. So, don't go looking to me for affirmation," the demon said. Gunn grunted.

"So, you're saying that we have to trust that _these_ visions are coming from the _right_ person who _hasn't_ been body-jacked?" he asked, a doubtful look on his face. "What's to say we aren't being led down the dark and downright shitty again? The Partners have manipulated us in the past…" Angel didn't say anything for a moment, but his hand tightened on his weapon.

"We trust Cordy," he said stiffly when he couldn't come up with an opposing argument. Gunn nodded.

"Right. We trust that it _is_ Cordy…" he said with more assurance than he felt. And apparently Angel was aware of that mistrust as he glared over at the young man. Gunn just shrugged. "I'm just sayin'… Let's go get the kid…" Angel didn't reply but started down the stairs. Just before they got to the bottom, Lorne grabbed Angel's arm.

"Conner's not here, Angel," he said. His red eyes looked into the room warily. "But there is some mojo going on here…" Angel nodded as he stepped off the last stair.

"Stay back, Lorne, just in case," he said. The demon stayed where he was bid.

"Gladly," he said. Gunn, Angel and Lindsey made their way into the fire-lit room. There wasn't anything special about it. It was all stone walls and cement floor. There were torches hanging on the walls, but other than that the room was empty.

"It's a bit eerie down here," Angel commented, breaking the silence.

"Only slightly more so now that we're not alone," Lindsey said.

"Well spotted, Lindsey," Lilah said as she appeared from behind Lorne on the stairway. Her heels clicked and echoed as she stepped by the wide-eyed demon and crossed the room to where the other three stood.

"How you didn't go further in Wolfram Hart is beyond me… oh wait… it was because you grew a conscience," she said. Lindsey didn't say anything, but smiled and looked as if he were bored.

"Where's Conner?" Angel demanded. Lilah smiled as well.

"Well out of reach of you and your…" she looked at Lindsey "… friends… He's in the Partners care now."

"He won't be for long," the vampire growled. Lilah just laughed.

"Awful lot of confidence for a group that had been tricked into handing over the vital piece of the coming end," she said.

"We weren't tricked, we were manipulated," Gunn said. Lilah turned to look at him.

"Isn't that the same thing?" she asked. Gunn fell silent. "Looks as if you've been relegated back to goon squad…" The black man rolled his shoulders in disinterest.

"It's where I should have been all along. That way, I get to kick your ass personally," he said. Lilah continued to smile.

"Perhaps. Perhaps not. The Partners have been planning this for longer than you've been in L.A, Angel. Conner was the reason why Darla was ever brought back. It was actually just a bonus all that time she drove you nuts and almost lost you everyone at Angel Investigations. It was her purpose to conceive the purported Destroyer," Lilah explained. Lindsey noticeably gritted his teeth at the though of the blond vampiress, his history with her still painfully fresh in his memory.

"Sorry, Lindsey, to bring up such a touchy subject for you… wait… no, I'm not," his former counter-part said.

"You are such a bitch," he gritted out. The woman shrugged.

"There are worse things to be," she said before turning to Angel again. "Well Angel, it looks as if your save the world mission may have failed this time around. By agreeing to Wolfram Hart's proposition, you gave Conner right to us. Remind me to send a thank you card," she said.

"I wasn't trying to save Conner from Wolfram Hart. I was trying to save him from himself," Angel said. Lilah clucked her tongue with a shake of her head.

"Angel, Angel, Angel. Where's your vision gone? What about that 'greater good'? You've spent too much time around humans. You're starting to think like one, rather than thinking like a champion. Conner has always been the means to the end. When you tried to save him, you played right into our hands," she said. Angel pointed his sword at her.

"We haven't played into anything. This isn't over," he said. Lilah smiled, clasping her hands behind her back.

"You think because you've got your little Seer back from the Powers that things are going to come out all hunky-dory. I wouldn't be hard pressed to tell you that you are wrong – very wrong. You may have a first class team, Angel, but what is a first class team when you no longer have them?" she asked, a malicious grin crossing her sharp features. Angel's face went ice cold at the implications and the realization at what Lilah's sudden appearance had accomplished.

"Back to the hotel, now," he said without looking at his companions. He turned to lead the charge out of the chamber but whirled quickly, heaving his weapon in his hand directly at the woman. The sword stopped, still hanging in mid-air, just inches from Lilah's chest. She stood there with a smirk on her face.

"See what becoming a Senior Partner can do?"

Angel only hesitated in surprise for a second before he rushed up the stairs after Lorne, Lindsey and Gunn. He knew they were too late. Wolfram Hart had already ambushed the hotel and taken everyone who was there. Now, the quicker they got there, the quicker they could track whoever had taken them and kill them all.

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

Cordelia opened her eyes slowly.

"Wes?" she asked. The room was dimly lit, only a few lanterns lighting the small room she was in. "Fred? Spike? Buffy? Anyone?" There were footsteps from behind her. Sitting up slightly, she turned to see what had made the noise. There was nothing there but dancing shadows. Closing her eyes, she turned back around and counted to ten to keep the panic at bay.

"It's alright, Cor. No priests with red-hot pokers, no poltergeists hanging you from ceiling fixtures, no demon children playing havoc with your hormones… those situations were bad and you got out of them. You can get out of this too…" she told herself. Another sound caused her eyes to snap open and she let out a shrill shriek as what caused it stepped closer.

"Conner…" she said, looking into the hate-filled eyes of the boy standing over her.

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

**A/N2: another evil _grin_**


	22. Part XXII

**A/N: Hi all! I'm glad you liked the last part! I was hoping this would be the next to last chapter, but it may drag out to 25 chapters. We'll see how my brain works. Thank you for all your reviews and I look forward to reading many, many more! As for J, if you want to use my stuff, go ahead. Let me know where it is so I can go read it and see what you applied it to – and, of course, promote your work shamelessly… :)**

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

"Cordy?" Fred's small voice called into the dark. Wes' eyes flew open at the other woman's name.

"Who turned out the lights?" Gunn's voice called. "Wes? Fred? Cordy? Buffy?"

"I'm here, Gunn," Wes answered.

"I'm here too," Buffy chimed in.

"You guys, I can't find Cordy!" Fred said, panicked.

"Well, I can't even find my own nose in this place it's so dark… Chances are, she's still knocked out,"Gunn said even though he sounded doubtful.

"Where do you think we are?" Fred said, trying to find her way closer to her friends.

"Somewhere in the bowels of Wolfram and Hart would be my guess," Wes answered. Gunn made a gagging sound.

"Dude, that was an ugly word. Could you use another one?" he asked. Wes gave Gunn what he hoped to be a look in his direction.

"Fine. We're somewhere within the Wolfram and Hart compound," he said.

"Shouldn't we know where we are then? We _did_ spend almost an entire year here," Fred commented.

"There was plenty that we were unaware of in our tenure here. I'm certain there are things we left unfound… or the Senior Partners left undetectable… It would be unsurprising considering they've masterminded all of this," Wes said as he started walking slowly, hands outstretched to guard himself from colliding with anything.

"We still can't find Cordelia," Fred said as she heard Wes shuffling around.

"Fred, I don't think Cordelia is here," Wes said.

"Why not?" the scientist asked. Buffy's voice broke into the blackness.

"Because we're the bait," she said.

"How is separating Cordy from us meant as bait?" Gunn asked.

"Because we are meant to bring Angel here. He's got Lorne and Lindsey with him. By coming here and then separating Cordelia, they are forcing Angel to go after her alone. And… walk right into a trap," Wes concluded.

"Trap, oh brainy one?"Buffy prompted. Wes let out a sigh.

"The spell the Senior Partners are planning on using to bind Conner's soul involves Angel's own soul. The spell we plan to use calls for the same thing," Wes said, connecting some dots that hadn't made sense earlier in his translation of the texts.

"Okay, what about Spike and me? We're needed too, and Spike isn't even here," Buffy said. Wes used his fingers to rub his temples.

"Yes, but Spike – not being of corporeal form – was probably able to route our attackers and is hopefully still back at the hotel waiting to relate our kidnapping back to Angel. He will then accompany Angel, Lorne and Lindsey here to rescue us. All four souls of the prophecy, plus Conner's, will then be within the walls of Wolfram and Hart… thus sparking the means of what is to come…" he explained. There was silence for a moment as Wes' implications became clear.

"Crap," Buffy said suddenly.

"Ditto,"Gunn said as well. Again, there was more silence.

"Well, we've got to find a way out of here…." Buffy stated as she, too, started shuffling around in search of a way out. Wes resumed his own awkward search.

"It _would_ be best if we could find a way out to Angel, rather than have him get trapped in here to find us…"

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

"Conner…" Cordelia said again as she sat up slightly. The boy's eyes continued to glare down at her. He was back to the angry young man that had returned from Quor'toth. Cordelia did not break his gaze as she made her way to her feet, albeit shakily.

"Conner, we've got to get out of here," she said. Still, the teenager stayed silent.

"Who knows what the Senior Partners have planned. And if Lindsey's right, if Lilah's back, things are further along than we thought," she said as she began to walk around the room looking for an exit. There was none that she could see.

"They showed me everything that happened," Conner's voice stopped her. "My life as Stephen… They showed me my _real_ father and his true nature, they showed me his pathetic attempts at being anything but the murderous demon he really is… they showed me the life he tried to give me… they showed me you…" Cordelia turned around to look at him, her eyes narrowed.

"That wasn't me... well, most of what you remember isn't me," she said. But Conner didn't hear her; he was so caught in his memories and his anger.

"You used me," he said bitterly. "You never cared for me at all!" Cordelia's lip twisted in a wry grimace.

"_I_ did not use you. I was used as a _vessel_ to use you…" she tried again. She straightened her shoulders. "And you're wrong about me not caring about you. I loved you. We all did. You were a son to all of us, not just Angel…" The boy was silent, but in a sudden burst of speed he had Cordelia by her neck and against the wall.

"You lie," he bit out. Cordelia's feet barely touched the ground and her hands went up to her neck to pry the hands away from her windpipe.

"No… I don't lie. You meant the world to me, to us, to Angel," she rasped out. "You still do!" The boy's grip tightened as something sparked in his eyes.

"I don't care anymore," he said. Cordelia's dark eyes locked on his. She didn't struggle anymore. If this boy she'd once thought of as a son was going to kill her, so be it.

"Did you ever care?" she asked without even a hint of acidity. The question caught Conner off-guard. The conflicted look in his eyes caused an ache in Cordelia's heart and a flash of anger so pure she almost didn't recognize it for what it was. _Damn the Senior Partners for playing havoc with everything in this boy's life, everything he'd ever loved or come to love! Damn the Powers for doing nothing to save him._

The grip tightened around her throat and it was then that Cordelia realized that, for Conner, there was no going back. There really never had been after that sweet baby boy had been carried off to a Hell dimension. This anger would always be inside him and forever define him. Conner – _their_ Conner - didn't know anything else…

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

Angel, Lindsey and Lorne all stormed through the hotel doors. The place was completely empty and eerily silent.

"Well, there's no welcoming party…" the demonsaid, clutching his weapon closer to him.

"Think again, mate," Spike said from the office. Angel, Lorne and Lindsey turned to look at him.

"What happened?" Angel asked, even though he already knew. Spike shrugged as he walked towards them.

"I think you know full well what bloody happened," he said flippantly. Angel glared.

"Do you know where they took them?"

"How am I supposed to know? All I saw were commandos raiding the cookie jar. I was a little occupied playing tug of war against three of them with Buffy in the middle to really ask them what good vacation spots they know…" he said.

"You're really not much help, are you?" Angel asked. Lorne frowned at Spike.

"How in the Hellmouthwere you playing tug of war with anyone? You're not exactly... well... not to point out handicaps or anything... but..." he said while waving a hand in front of the ghost. Spike looked slightly abashed at his slip. Lindsey only smiled as Angel rounded on the blond man.

"What aren't you telling us, Spike?" he asked. Spike shrugged again.

"Nothing important." Angel made a fist and attempted to put it through Spike's skull. It only passed through him.

"So, you can play tug of war with Buffy, but I can't clock you?" he asked. Spike just smiled.

"All the benefits without the drawbacks, wouldn't you say?" he goaded. Angel growled in frustration, but it was Lindsey who finally shed light on the subject.

"What Goldilocks here is not saying is that his soul is bound to Miss Summers," he informed. All turned to look at him.

"Bound?" Spike asked, intrigued at the news. Lindsey nodded.

"That would be the word," he confirmed.

"How did I miss that?" Lorne asked, confused as he looked over the ghost.

"What does _that_ mean?"Angel asked, ignoring the demon. The ex-Lawyer smirked.

"Well, by technical definition, the word 'bound' is the past tense form of the verb 'bind' and means something akin to tie or fasten together, or more in our case, to be compelling or unifying. I'd say both work in this case…" he said. He then looked to Lorne. "How _did _you miss that?" Lorne just sneered at him before turning to look at Angel.

"If Blondie Bear's bound to your ex, that would probably mean you're bound to Princess, right?" he asked. Angel found his way back into the office, the rest following behind.

"It would make sense," he said as he picked up one of Wes' discarded books. "The whole dark with dark and light with light stuff, I mean…"

"But who's dark and who's light? I'd think that would be important in the spell, right? We can't just play 'eenie meenie' with souls…"Lorne said.

"I have no idea, you're the soul expert of the four of us.That is why they took Wes. Without him, we don't know. We need to find them. And then we need to find Conner," he said.

"Maybe it was the kid who took them," Lindsey suggested. Spike shook his head.

"No, he wasn't around at all. It was just a bunch of people in black with guns…" he said.Lorne and Angel looked at each other for a second.

"Wolfram and Hart…"Lorne said for both of them. "Would they take them there?" Angel nodded.

"Yeah, they would. The Senior Partners want me, Cor, Buffy and Spike in order to use our souls to take Conner's. What better place to do that than at Wolfram and Hart?"Lorne looked at Lindsey.

"Up to seeing your Alma Matter one more time?" he asked. Lindsey smiled.

"For the _last _time no matter which way it goes? Why not?" he said.

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

_An hour later..._

"I can't find anything. Can you guys?"Gunn asked after what _had_ to be more than an hour of getting nowhere.

"Zippo, zilch, nada," Fred muttered, just as disheartened.

"Well, what next? I'm not going to be much good kicking baddie ass if I can't _see_ baddie ass…" Buffy said.

"Any ideas? Anyone?" Fred asked.

"I have no idea what to do…" Wes admitted to Fred.

"God, if I could just _see_ something, I could at least think of something to do!" Buffy whined. There was the sound of doors opening that caught their attention.

"Someone's coming… take advantage whatever light comes available…" Wes instructed. They were all silent as they waited for the new presence to approach.

"Wesley!" Angel voice called out suddenly, the echo of running feet welcome to him.

"Angel? Where are you? Can you see us?" Wes asked, relaxing. There was a hesitation from the vampire.

"Angel? Aren't you going to get us out? We need to get out!" Fred asked. Angel cleared his throat.

"You guys _are_ out…" he said. Wes frowned.

"What do you mean?" he asked. Lindsey let out a quick laugh.

"You guys are sitting in the back of the lobby at Wolfram & Hart…" he said. Wes' eyes went wide.

"No… we've got to be trapped in a cell of some sort. We woke up and couldn't see anything. How did you get in here?" the ex-Watcher asked looking and still seeing nothing.Lorne put his hand on his shoulder causing the man to jump slightly.

"No… you're in the lobby. You four were stumbling all over yourselves when we walked in," he said. Wes felt his face and then ran a hand in front of his eyes.

"A blinding spell… they must have hit us with it while we were unconscious," he said after a moment.

"They wanted to keep you in plain sight, but keep you from leaving," Lindsey said. "You were bait… the visible kind."

"Clever little toadies…"Gunn said. "Now, fix it…"

"How?"Lorne asked. "We don't have anything with us besides our weapons…"

"Well, can't you use those to fix us?"Gunn asked.

"Well, I can cut your head off and see if that fixes things for you,"Lorne suggested to the man. "It usually works for me... consider it a cranial re-boot..."Gunn's eyes went wide as his hand came up to his neck.

"Ah… no thanks. I'm good… maybe next time," he said.

"Where's Cordelia?" Angel interrupted the bickering. The group fell silent.

"We have no idea, Angel. She wasn't with us when we woke up," Fred said softly.

"We need to locate Cordy, but we can't without our sight," Wes said.

"How are we going to fix that?" Gunn asked. Wes was silent in thought for a moment.

"We may not have to. I've thought through blinding spells, and I'm fairly certain that there are only three types of blinding spells. The Rugarian spell is only a temporary disarmament used by their warriors to gain advantage in battle. The Fletruvian spell hasn't been fully translated yet and in its current state only serves to… well… it's safe to say that the Fletruvian has not been performed on us. The Nishara spell… _that_ is a permanent state. So, when I say we won't have to do anything…" Wes explained.

"… you mean it's either fixable on its own or it's not fixable at all," Angel picked up.

"How long do you think it takes before we know whether it's permanent or not?" Fred asked, letting her hand wave in front of her face a couple of times.

"I have no idea. It probably shouldn't last more than a few hours at most if it truly were the Rugarian spell…" Wes said.

"A few hours? How long were we out?" Buffy asked.

"We were gone for about an hour, maybe a little more since we had to come here,"Lindsey answered.

"If that's the case, we should start seeing the effects wearing off if it were the Rugarian spell…" Wes stated.Gunn cleared his throat.

"What is it?" Fred asked from beside him.

"I think my spell is wearing off…" he said.

"What makes you say that? Can you see anything?" Wes asked.

"Yeah… well, I can see the army of living undead approaching from behind Angel…" he said. Angel,Lorne and Lindsey spun around.

"Vampires?" Fred asked, still unable to see anything. Lorne gulped.

"No, sugar. The other kind…" he said.

"Zombies," Wes and Angel said at the same time as a group of a dozen zombies closed in, blocking the exit.

"Well… there arethree of us that can see and fightand twelve of them… I'm not seeing the good in this," Gunn said as Lindsey tossed him his axe.

"Four," Spike said as he wielded a weapon. Gunn rolled his eyes.

"Right. Forgot…" he said.

"Five…" Lorne said weakly as he took a stake from Angel.

"Six," Wes added as he stole a knife from Gunn. He blinked furiously a few times as he cleared his newly-restored vision. Buffy smiled as she stepped forward.

"Oh, there's seven…" she said, making a fist. Fred stumbled forward a little bit.

"Eight, although all I can see are fuzzy blobby things at the moment. Thank god it was the Rugarian spell…" she said as she reached for a weapon from Gunn as well… and missed. Gunn eyed her warily and put the other knife back in his belt.

"We'll just wait until you can actually see," he said and pushed her gently behind everyone that wielded a weapon. The zombies circled in closer and Angel took the first step to starting the impending skirmish. With a single blow he took off the heads of two zombies. Gunn, Wes and Lorne followed suit and ganged up on one of the zombies as it made a swipe at the untouchable Spike. The ghost helped to deflect the attacks on Fred and Lindsey and the three of them were able to overtake a few of them. Buffy and Angel worked against the majority of their attackers, taking them out quickly with a flurry of well-placed blows and sword swings. Gunn finished most of them off with his axe.

"We've sliced and diced the competition, but we'd better get this rescue mission moving. They're zombies. We've only delayed them," Lindsey pointed out.

"Right… The Hulk's uglier twin and I will go try to scope a way out, and clear the path if necessary. Y'all go find Barbie," Gunn said as he hefted up his trusty axe. Lorne gave the man a blood red stare, never more thankful that he actually _could_ stare.

"I will have you know that back home I was quite the lady-killer…" he said, deflecting his nervousness at the situation. Then his shoulders fell slightly. "Well, until I ran away and brought shame upon my family. Now all the lovely ladies would rather kill me, all the while chanting 'kill the coward'…" Gunn turned to look at the demon.

"Are you saying that you miss Pylea?" he asked. Lorne looked shocked.

"By the Powers, _no_! I'm just saying… the only people there getting insults would be all of you ugly cows," he said. All that were human turned to look at the green man. He held up his hands. "Hey! I'm just saying!" Angel pointed to the door.

"Go secure a way out. And Gunn? If you have him accidentally beheaded, it may shut him up… for a little bit," he said. Gunn smirked at the wide-eyed demon.

"I'll keep that in mind," he said.

"Well, isn't that just a 'thank you very much'?" Lorne asked with an indignant huff as he and Gunn broke off from the group.

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

"Things are progressing well…" Lilah said. The figures standing ahead of her looked between themselves before looking back to her.

"The preparations?" one of them asked. Lilah smiled.

"Are finished and waiting their cue," she said. Another figure nodded.

"There must be no mistakes," it said, a veiled warning hidden in the simple phrase. Lilah's smile widened.

"How could there be? The boy will kill the girl, Angel will then kill the boy… then the Partners will have the boy's soul to do with what we will. The end of the world is within our grasp," she said. The figures were silent as they pondered their newest addition's bravado.

"No mistakes…" was all one of them repeated. "Begin the spell…"

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

Cordelia could hear footsteps, and she only hoped that they were good footsteps.

"Let me go, Conner…" she rasped. "You're not going to fix anything like this…" Conner sneered as he stepped closer to her.

"I'll fix it all. I kill you, I kill all of them – I'll make all of it go away. They said they would fix everything…" he said.

"Killing us isn't what they are after, Conner. The Senior Partners aren't going to fix anything… they're going to kill you too! And then, they'll destroy the world," she said. Conner looked at her impassively.

"So? I see that as an improvement," he said unemotionally. There was a slamming sound as a door, one that Cordelia would never have been able to find, crashed open. Her eyes found his with a relieved look.

"Angel…" she sighed. Conner glowered at his father as his grip on her throat remained bruisingly hard. Cordelia could feel the tension in young boy and knew he was about to snap. Preferably, not her neck.

"Let her go," Angel's growl reverberated through the room. Cordelia's eyes shot back to where he stood. Conner may have been the vampire's only son, but by the look in Angel's eyes, he would be the vampire's only _dead_ son if he didn't do what he was told.

"Don't you have a world to save?" the boy growled back. Spike rolled his eyes from behind the vampire.

"I will not even _begin_ to comment on the irony of that question…" he said. Angel's glare did not waver from his son.

"I will say this only one more time… _let her go_…" he bit out. The stare down commenced with Conner still holding tight to Cordelia. Spike leaned over Buffy's shoulder.

"I think there should be one of those cheesy American western themes playing," he said quietly. Buffy turned to glare at him.

"Shut _up_, Spike," she hissed.

"Anything for you, luv. Although, I did already do that whole nasty 'soul' thing…" he said. The ghost noticed a tenseness come over Buffy and couldn't help a certain amount of smugness.

"Shut… _up_…" Buffy said again. She had just turned around when Angel blindly threw his cell phone back at Buffy. She caught it with a questioning look at his back.

"Call Gunn. Tell him we've got Cordelia. Get us a way out…" he said. Buffy looked questioningly at the phone for a few seconds before Fred snatched it out of her hand and did what Angel bid.

"What… what about Conner?" Buffy asked the vampire softly. Conner smiled at his father.

"Yes… _dad_… what about me?" he asked.

"He's coming home…" Angel said, answering the Slayer. Conner only sneered.

"Home? Where's my home? The hell-dimension I was raised in? With a vampire? Or how about that place you stuck me that last time?"

"… he just doesn't realize it yet," Angel finished. Before anyone could say anything Gunn rushed into the room.

"Yo, Angel… I've got a way out… but…" Gunn started before he turned and saw Conner with Cordelia.

"… we've got to hurry…" he finished lamely. The interruption was enough to disrupt the tense tableau. In a split second, Conner moved, shoving Cordelia to the floor and past the group that was stumbling to take care of her. He shoved Gunn to the side as he made his escape.

"Shit!" Gunn cried out as he met the floor. "What the hell happened?"

"Well… I think that Conner just may have escaped," Wes said. The black man just gave the ex-Watcher a glare.

"Let's go, let's go, let's go… no time to dawdle, kiddies!" Lorne said as he came into the room all the while looking over his shoulder. He turned to look at Angel and Cordelia and a smile lit up his face.

"Hey, kitten. You're all in one piece… Good… great… marvelous… it's time to _go…_" he urged, pointing to the door.

"Give her a second, Lorne," Angel said.

"Where did Conner go?" Cordelia asked, rubbing her neck as he helped her to her feet. His hand brushed over the finger marks that were imprinted on her skin.

"He ran off…" he told her.

"You shouldn't have let him do that, Angel. We need him… and we need him _away_ from the Senior Partners," she said, bringing her hand back up to rest over his. His eyes met hers.

"Right now, he is not my immediate concern. And before you say I should have gone after him, I can tell you right now that I shouldn't have. I may have beaten him to a bloody pulp if I got my hands on him…" he said, his hand moving up to her cheek.

"Don't you think we should be scramming right about now?" Buffy's voice broke into the moment. Cordelia looked over at the blonde with a hard look.

"Remind me, when you have a mushy moment, to rain on your parade, okay?" she said before looking at Angel. "But she _is_ right, no matter how much I will deny saying that later…" Angel smiled but nodded.

"We need to find Conner and get out of here. The Senior Partners have everyone they need here… if we can get back to the Hyperion, we have a chance of heading this off before it starts…" Angel said, taking Cordelia by the hand and heading to the door.

"Don't you think it's a bit ironic that we are going back to the Hyperion? Hyperion, in the Grecian times, was the Titan of Light… an early sun god. And Angel being a vampire and all and living at a hotel called the Hyperion…" Fred rambled as they all rushed down the hallways to find the exit.

"Sorry Fred, but now really isn't the time to share trivial tidbits…" Wes said from her side.

"In other words, luv, shut up…" Spike added, not-so-politely.

"Sorry… I'm just a little nervous…" she said. Lorne gave the girl a quick smile.

"If you weren't nervous about being on the verge of the end of the world I'd have to worry about your noggin… And remind me to have you tell me all about your Greek tidbits when things aren't quite so perilous, sugarkins…" he said reassuringly. Fred smiled back as they all quickened their pace.

They had just turned down the last hallway before the lobby as a bright light suddenly burst forth from nowhere. Everyone stopped running and quickly averted their eyes. As it faded away, Wes, Fred, Lorne, Gunn and Lindsey all turned to look at the empty space where Angel, Cordelia, Spike and Buffy had stood. Wes straightened and started running quickly back down to the room they had just vacated.

"Wes! What are you doing? We need to get out of here," Gunn yelled, scrambling after him. The others followed as the ex-Watcher scrambled down the stairway back into the basement. Everyone was out of breath as they finally reached their destination.

"Wesley… what… the hell?" Gunn sputtered out. Wes ran around the room gathering all the wooden objects he could find.

"They've initiated the spell to control Conner's soul. There's no time to get back to the hotel. We need to do our spell… NOW!" he called back as he started to pull torches from the wall.

"Great…" Lorne bemoaned. "Angel jinxed us… He just _had _to state the obvious earlier. Why do we always call down the thunder?"

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

Angel blinked and he was suddenly somewhere else. He couldn't say where… It looked like the Oracle's conduit, but he knew it wasn't. Sensing a presence, the vampire spun around. There, just in front of him on a stone altar-like object, lay Conner. But it wasn't the warped teenage version of him that had returned from Quor'toth. Instead, it was the innocent form of his infant son that was seared into Angel's vast memory. Gently, the father ran a cool hand over his child's warm skin. It was no dream or vision. His Conner was right in front of him. The baby's dark eyes stared up at Angel. This moment could have, quite possibly, been conjured up by the Senior Partners as a trap, but Angel didn't care as he picked the infant up and cradled him gently in his arms. The vampire smiled down at Conner even as he felt another presence reveal itself. He didn't need to turn to identify the person standing next to him.

"Doyle…" he said, his smile widening slightly. A hand clasped his shoulder.

"Good to see ya, Champ…"

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

All she felt was peace… and it was nice. There wasn't much peace anymore, even _after_ the Hellmouth had been vanquished. Well, 'blown to tiny bits' was a more accurate description. In fact, this sort of peace felt familiar. Buffy opened her eyes and looked around. A happy sigh escaped her lips. She was in heaven. It felt good to be back here. It felt like coming home.

"Buffy…" her mother's voice startled her. With wide eyes, she let familiar arms wrap around her.

"_Mom_…" Buffy said, letting her eyes close and her head dip down to rest on the shoulder that had been there for her so many times before.

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

Spike looked around. He wasn't anywhere he recognized. It was all white stone and bright light.

"Bloody well looks like a marshmallow threw up in here," he commented.

"Do not mock the higher plane," a monotone voice scolded. Spike spun around to see the shimmery shape of a woman approaching him. With a snort, he noted that she floated just above the ground.

"Too good to walk like the rest of us?" he chided.

"This battle can be won," she said. Spike's eyebrow rose.

"Well, cutting to the quick, then, are we?" he noted.

"There can be peace," she said, floating closer to him. He was only slightly startled by the blank eyes that stared at him, her irises eerily white.

"There's no such thing as peace, you shifty bint. You've been sailing on your fluffy little cloud for a little too long," Spike spat.

"You can find peace if you wish it," she said. "But you can be condemned to a waking hell if all does not turn out right…"

With a snap of her fingers, the scenery changed from peaceful, soothing white to dark, dank surroundings with screams piercing the foul-smelling air.

"It is your choice, Lower Being, on where your destiny will take you," she said, looking around the area with distaste.

"I'm not one for destinies," Spike said. The woman looked back to him, the same look of distaste residing on her face as her sightless eyes rested on him.

"The world is in great peril…" was all she said.

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

She didn't know what was happening, but her body felt weightless. All she saw was the blinding light that made her squint. As the bright light faded away, Cordelia's eyes focused enough to see Skip standing in front of her.

"Didn't think you'd see me again, did you?" he asked. It took Cordelia a second before she realized where she was and what was going to happen.

"Well… _crap_…"

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

**A/N: Almost… there… :) And sorry it took so long to get this up. I've been laid low with the flu… so if anything seems a little off, let me know. My fever-wracked brain hasn't been working properly over the last four days, but despite it all, I still wrote and posted just for all you beautiful readers out there… :) And on another FYI note, the whole scene where Angel comes upon Wes, Buffy and Co. in Wolfram and Hart will probably be re-written (and probably not the only part, if I get ambitious). It was awful, I know. My mental faculties weren't up to par and I apologize profusely for the lame excuse for "action"…**

**A/N2: Thanks forensicsgirl for the important editorial comment... I don't know if any of the others noticed, but Lorne was in two places at once! Well, I've gone through and edited that the best I could. If anyone else notices discrepencies like that, let me know! I told you my fever-wracked brain wasn't up to par!**


	23. Part XXIII

**A/N - blushes Thanks for all the kind words. They made my week. Who needs the flu when there are such nice people in the world? ANYWAY, just a short plug… please read the start of 'If All Else Fails' by Bella7. I've helped her brainstorm a lot of ideas and she's got a really wonderful start. Let her (and me by association) know what you think as well! Enjoy this next part, it was fun to write!**

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

The scramble was panicked as everyone ran into the room and began pulling torches from the walls without knowing exactly why.

"Why are we in danger of singeing more than just a few hairs?" Lorne asked, holding three torches far away from his body. Wes pointed to the meager fire burning in the middle of the room.

"Those flames need to be bigger before I can start the spell," he said. Immediately, everyone threw their multiple torches onto the pile of wood and the flames came to life. As the fire grew in intensity, the Englishman turned to look at the group.

"We need some supplies. I'm afraid that I didn't store any in my pockets before Wolfram and Hart took us captive. Fred, I need you to run to the lab. You'll need to get five soul stones as well as pick up some arrowroot, serpent's blood, yucca blossoms, and…"

"Eye of newt?" Gunn asked. Wes gave him a surprised look.

"Yes…" he said. Fred shrugged at Gunn's smug look.

"There's _always_ eye of newt…" she said. Gunn just continued to smile.

"I know…" he said. Fred looked to Wes.

"Do you think I'll be able to get into the lab?" she asked. Wes thought for a second.

"You should be able to, but at this point, there's really no choice. You have to get in there…" he said. Gunn stepped forward.

"Lawyer boy and I will go with her," he said. Lindsey rolled his eyes.

"I didn't volunteer," he said. Fred put her hands on her hips as she turned on him.

"You want out of here so bad, then get your butt in gear and let's save Angel, Cordy, Buffy and Spike! We have to save them so they can save Conner. Then you can go off an live whatever miserable excuse for a life you've got with all the bitterness and cowardly… stuff," she said. Lorne smiled.

"Well said, Fredikins…" he said. The girl gave him a smile before marching purposely towards the door. Gunn and Lindsey dutifully followed.

"Can we leave Angel where he is?" Lindsey asked as they walked out. Gunn snorted.

"You _wanna_die? Besides, I'd rather leave Spike…" he said, his voice trailing as they made their way up the stairs. Wes turned back to the fire, watching it closely.

"The fire will be ready by the time they get back," he said. Lorne clucked his tongue.

"I sure hope you know what you're doing," he said. Wes looked into the flames.

"That _would_ be a pleasant change," he said absently. Lorne watched him with worried eyes.

"Not installing much confidence here, bucko," he told the ex-Watcher.

"Do we ever really know what we are doing?" Wes asked. Lorne opened his mouth, but didn't say anything for a second as he thought about it.

"Good point," he said finally. Wes just smiled as he used a torch to stoke the fire a bit more.

"Do you think we'll win?" Lorne asked suddenly, fidgeting with his suit collar. Wes smiled.

"You'd be the better one to know that," he said. Lorne pat his pockets for a second.

"Well darn, I left my divination pants at home…" he said. "You're the leader in absentia… actually, you're still the leader, period. Angel was the leader when we were Evil's puppets, but since we're not anymore, you're still the leader…"

"Actually, no. I forfeited that the moment I took Conner," the Englishman said. Lorne shook his head.

"Nuh-uh, no way. Angel Investigations, for all purposes, is a democracy and it was not put to a vote…" he said. "That means, you are still the leader and you have to buck up the troops… meaning me. Tell me what you think…"

"I think…" Wes said before taking a breath. "… that things will end up the way they are supposed to end up…"

"Never thought you to be a fatalist, you Gloomy Gus," Lorne said. Wes looked up at the demon.

"I'm not a fatalist. I'm just saying…" he started. Lorne held up his hand.

"Before we go traipsing down that particular road called Misery, let me just say that it wasn't your fault," he said. Wes was silent. Lorne barreled on.

"You took Conner for reasons that were completely founded. True, it may have brought us to this exact point, but as was discussed earlier, everything that happened gave us a _chance_ to get to this point. Amigo… it is rare that prophecies do not come to pass. That's where the whole literal versus figurative thing comes in. The fact that we've averted a few disastrous ones makes us luckier than most. We've taken stabs at the prophecies, it's only fair that a couple take a stab at us. Conner was named the Destroyer. In one way or another, that's exactly what he is going to be. _You_ had nothing to do with it…" he said. Wes looked at the demon with a look of relief on his face.

"Thank you, Lorne," he said. Lorne smiled.

"Just call me balm for the wounded soul…" he said before turning completely earnest. "Now… tell Papa Lorne what he wants to hear…" Wes' eyes smiled, but his face remained serious.

"Oh, we're going to kick its ass…" he said in a completely un-Wes-like way. Lorne studied the ex-Watcher and then broke into a clap.

"Oh goodie…" Running footsteps caused Wes to rise and the two turned to look at the door.

"Got 'em!" Fred cried as she ran into the room and to Wes, handing him the requested items. "The only thing a little worse for wear are Lindsey and Gunn…" The two men walked into the room, Lindsey holding an injured arm and Gunn limping slightly.

"Thanks for the love," Gunn grumbled.

"What happened?" Wes asked as he sorted out the ingredients in front of him.

"We ran into a zombie goon squad. They're searching the levels from what we could see," Lindsey explained. "We don't have all that much time…"

"All we need time for is the spell. Then, we leave," Wes said sternly.

"What about the souls? Don't we need to specify or something?" Lorne asked as Wes prepared a circle around the fire with the serpent's blood. He gave the demon a quick look before turning back to his ministrations.

"I know the souls," he said, laying out the gem-like soul stones. He arranged three of the stones to the side and circled them with serpent's blood. The other two he set a little off to the side of those stones and poured the rest of the serpent's blood directly over them. Lorne waited for a further explanation, but none came.

"Didn't Mother teach you to share?" he prodded. Wes stayed silent as he started to haphazardly crush the yucca blossoms.

"It is none of your concern, Lorne," he told him. Lorne's eyes went wide.

"None of my concern? We're playing roulette with souls here. Don't you think that I, of all people qualified, should be in on the game?" he asked. Wes shook his head.

"It's out of your hands. And in a few moments, it will be out of all of our hands…" he said.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lorne asked, a frown now gracing his features.

"Hush, Lorne," Fred said, taking the demon's arm and pulling him back to where she, Gunn and Lindsey stood, separate from Wesley.

The watcher threw the arrowroot and the yucca blossoms into the flames causing the flames to flare up bright red. The ex-Watcher reached into his pocket and retrieved the spell. Without a word of warning, he kneeled and began to recite the words on the scrap of paper.

_Dubh a dubh  
__Buadh a buadh  
__Aoniachanamas_

A wind whipped through the chamber causing Fred to shiver and lean into Lorne. The four watched, mesmerized as Wes continued to recite, throwing more arrowroot and yucca blossoms into the fire. The two stones in the serpent's blood started to glow, casting a light onto Wes.

_Deoin ar leir  
__Tabhairag comhdhuin  
__Feum cha aonaichan_

_Anam ag athairiam mie immramana dachaidhe_

He threw the last ingredient, the eye of newt, into the roaring fire. After a second, the fire died down to its original, barely-there size. All five stones vanished… The wind suddenly died down and the chamber went silent.

"I don't feel like anything different has happened," Gunn whispered to Lorne. The green demon nodded in agreement as he watched Wesley.

"How do we know it worked?" Lorne asked softly. Lindsey watched the tense ex-Watcher.

"We don't," he said.

"How reassuring," Lorne muttered.

"That's it! What are you doing?" Fred asked, panicked, as Wes folded the piece of paper and returned it to his pocket. "Aren't there more words? More things to do? Aren't you going to bring them back?" Wes let out a tired sigh at his friend's near hysterics.

"I'm sorry, Fred. There's nothing more I can do. I've performed the protection spell. It will keep the Senior Partners away from the four of them. Conner's soul now rests in their hands and their choices…"

"Where do your souls rest then, I wonder?" an unfamiliar voice asked. The four of them turned to see an army of vampires and zombies waiting for them. Lilah stood at the head of the group.

"Kill them all…" she said with a smirk. Lorne gulped.

"I'll take that as a hint to skee-daddle…"

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

"Why, thank you for such a verbose welcome," Skip said to her with a smile. Cordelia just waved a hand at the demon.

"Trust me, it was for the lack of better things to say…" she said. Skip laughed.

"Or don't you mean the lack of PG words to say?" he asked. Cordelia gave him a look as she stopped pacing and turned to him.

"Why, aren't you just a mind reader?" she asked in a sugary-sweet voice. Skip shrugged.

"Special talent," he said. Cordelia gave him another look.

"Expecting to pass around your resume in the near future?" she asked.

"Nah. Ever since that whole 'ascension' screw-up, the Powers and I have been thicker than thieves," the demon said. Cordelia raised an eyebrow and Skip held up his hands in defeat. "Bad expression, sorry." Cordelia looked around.

"Okay, so you're all high and mighty with the Powers. I've been down that road before and look where it got us. Why should I trust you now?" she asked. Skip scoffed.

"What do you expect from me? A secret handshake?" he asked menacingly. Cordelia rolled her eyes.

"Nothing as lame as that!" she said. Then she looked squarely at him. "What else ya got?"

"Blood oath?" he asked, taking out his sword. Cordelia held up her hands.

"Eeew…" she said, stepping back. Skip put his sword down and smiled.

"How 'bout the word of an old friend?" he asked. A light flashed and a familiar voice greeted her.

"Hey, Princess…" Doyle's voice said from behind her. Cordelia's eyes widened as she spun around and tried to hug him. Instead, she stepped right through him. She let out a huff of teary frustration.

"Sorry about that," Skip said with a wince. Cordelia looked back at the demon with a suspicious glance.

"How do I know this isn't just some Senior Partner parlor trick?" she asked him.

"You'd best be listenin' to what Skip-o here has to say, Princess. He'll steer ya right," Doyle said, causing the brunette to turn back to him. She smiled at the form of one of her best friends.

"We miss you," she said. Doyle smiled back.

"I know that, Love-o'-me-life," he said. Cordelia chuckled, feeling at ease with his familiar banter.

"If given the chance, Angel will kick your Power-y ass for that punch," she told him. Doyle grinned.

"Oh, aye. I'm aware o' that. Wouldn't blame him, him bein' champion and all. But…" he said, sobering as he reached forward and brushed a stray hair from Cordelia's cheek. "… it's time for me ta go. I've got a date with a pint…" Cordelia smiled.

"Of course you do," she said. He smiled as he began to fade.

"Choose wisely, Princess," he said before he was gone completely. She stood there with a fond smile on her face for a few seconds more before a frown wrinkled her brow.

"Choice?" she asked, crossing her arms and looking to the demon. Skip smiled.

"Ah, now down to business. Your choice is easy. In fact… I think yours is the easiest of them all. You either become human and live or regain your Seer abilities and die," Skip said. Cordelia re-crossed her arms and shifted on her feet.

"And what makes you think I trust you enough to take a choice like that from you? Parading Doyle in front of me doesn't a trustworthy demon make…" she told him. Skip smiled again, his crooked teeth making him look slightly more frightening.

"Because you never took a choice from me the last time, Alice. That was never me, just as that Cordelia was never _really_ you," he said. Cordelia eyed him.

"So you're giving me the same choice as last time?" she asked. Skip flicked his wrist.

"With a twist… Last time, the Partners manipulated it all enough to give you the choice between staying human or becoming demon. It was the becoming demon that allowed them to play havoc with your life. It never should have been an option. This time, you're human either way…" Cordelia lifted a brow.

"So, I'll either die for a purpose or live without one?" she asked. Skip just stared at her.

"Have you learned _nothing_ in all this, Cordelia Chase?" he asked.

"What are you talking about?" she asked back. He shook his head.

"It's time to choose…"

"Well, gee, thanks for giving a girl time to think about what to damn herself to!" she snapped at him. He held up his hands to ward off any other verbal knives.

"The choice is up to you what happens from here on out. No ulterior motives, no bribing, no lists of pro and cons. It is simply up to you where you want to go. The Powers are just giving you the free ticket…" Skip said. Cordelia thought that over for a second.

"I can't give up the mission," Cordelia said finally. The demon tilted his head, giving her the argument.

"There is nothing more important than the mission…" Skip said. Cordelia nodded.

"I know," she said.

"Then you know what you must do," he told her. She was silent as she thought over the options again. Straightening her shoulders, her eyes looked directly into the demon's.

"I choose…" Cordelia started. Skip smiled as he watched a bright light envelope the woman in front of him.

"As you wish…" he said. Cordelia's eyes widened as she saw a blurry vision of herself slip slowly out of her body. Panic set in and she reached out to pull whatever was leaving her back.

"No…" she said hoarsely. "Stop, come back…" Her hand went through the shiny copy of her arm. The figure stood full in front of her and then melted into a simple pillar of light, no longer resembling its host.

"Skip… what's happening to me?" Cordelia asked, suddenly feeling tired. The panic receded. The demon looked somberly at her.

"Cordelia Chase, your sacrifice will not be in vain. Your reward shall breathe new life… Have you ever thought that your purpose is greater than anything the Powers could ever grant? Anything the Powers could ever understand?" he asked her. One thought ran through her brain at his question. _Geez, crptic much?_ Then, another thought rushed into her head and she inhaled quickly. Panic set in once more… A tear ran down her cheek as she closed her eyes. Everything went dark as one word slipped softly by her lips.

"_Angel__…"_

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

"Mom…" Buffy said again. Joyce's hand came up to rub her daughter's back.

"Oh honey… everything's alright," she said with a smile. Buffy drew back and looked at her mother's healthy, happy face.

"I've missed you so much, Mom. So many things have happened…" she said. Joyce reached up to swipe a stray piece of hair off of her daughter's forehead.

"I know, sweetie. And you've been so brave. You always have been so brave," she said. Buffy's eyes watered.

"I haven't been brave lately. I've been running. I've run away from what's left of Sunnydale, I've even run from my friends. I've run from things I refuse to handle… I've run from my _life_," she admitted, tears finally breaking free. Her mother let her cry while running a soothing hand over Buffy's back. After a few moments, Joyce took Buffy by the shoulders and held her away.

"You didn't have the choice before, Buffy, but you get to have it now. You've cut yourself off from everyone as if you are waiting for the other shoe to drop. Consider this it, Buffy," her mother said. The Slayer lifted wet cheeks to look at Joyce.

"What are you talking about?" she asked, lifting a hand to wipe the tear tracks away. Joyce reached out and took Buffy's hand.

"You have a choice," she said. Understanding hit Buffy like a truck.

"You mean I can stay here, with you… or I can go back and be the Slayer," she said. Joyce smiled.

"You have people that love you and that you love as well in both places. You have a peace here that you don't have there, but you have purpose and a chance at a life there you will never really have here.," she said. Buffy's thoughts went to her family and friends. Dawn, Giles, Willow, Xander, Angel… With a sigh, she allowed herself to think of Spike. She'd be lying to herself if she said that she didn't care about him. She'd be lying even more if she said she didn't feel more than just caring for him. It was hard not to when she really let herself see the vampire – _person _– he'd become before he sacrificed himself for her. When she'd told him she loved him, she hadn't been lying… but it wasn't something she was quite ready to deal with yet. So, she swept those feelings underneath the proverbial rug once more. There were more important things to deal with at the moment. The world wasn't going to _not_ end because she'd had a sudden insight into her own head. The thought caused Buffy's eyes to well up again. The world was ending… and she needed to do something no matter how much this peace called to her. But she was so tired…

"You said I was brave, Mom. I want to be brave again," Buffy said, a tear dripping off her chin. Joyce's finger caught it and traced the tear-track back up to the corner of her daughter's eye.

"Don't do something just to be brave, Buffy," she said lovingly. "Do what your heart wants." Buffy's chin dropped to her chest.

"I don't know what my heart wants," she said miserably. "I haven't for a long time…"

"Why were you happy the last time we saw each other?" Joyce asked. Buffy thought for a second and then smiled.

"Because I'd done my duty. I'd fulfilled my destiny," she said. Joyce smiled.

"Have you?" she asked. Buffy's eyes went to her mother's. A moment passed before Buffy sighed.

"No. I don't think I have… not just yet," she admitted.

"It's not your time, Buffy. You've a life to lead yet. You have people to live for," she said.

"Dawn," Buffy said with a single, purposeful nod. Joyce smiled again as she gathered her daughter close.

"Among other people. Honey, if you go back, you will have to find your place again and you will have to let people back in. Things have changed, Buffy, and things will have changed even more if you go back. It will be up to you to adapt to those changes and make a new life for yourself," she advised. Buffy nodded again. Her choice was made.

"I love you, Mom…"

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

Spike flinched at the screams that now surrounded him. His mind immediately went back to the white area. He glared back at the woman.

"Well, geez… give a bloke an actual choice! It's like choosing between a new car and just the sodding steering wheel…"

"Two choices have been made… it is now up to you…" she said in her cryptic way. Spike rolled his eyes.

"Talk about no pressure," he muttered. "So, what, my choice is between living as a vampire and going to hell? Isn't that the same bloody thing?" The woman looked at him.

"Your choice is between redemption and salvation," she said. Spike frowned.

"What's the bleeding difference?"

"I think you already know," she said. When Spike turned to look at her, she was already gone.

"Oh bloody hell," he said.

"Hurry it up, would ya? There's a world out there that needs to be saved," Cordelia's voice suddenly broke in. Spike spun around.

"What the hell are you popping around for?" he asked. Cordelia grinned.

"I made my choice…" she said.

"Help a bloke out then," he grumbled. Cordelia grinned again.

"When in doubt answer 'C'," she said. Spike's eyes narrowed.

"You're dead, aren't you?" he asked.

"What makes you say that?" she asked back. Spike rolled his eyes.

"You're here, aren't you?" he told her.

"That doesn't mean anything," she said.

"Fine. Don't answer." She smiled.

"You know that I can't tell you what I decided," she said.

"Tell me what I should decide then," he said. Cordelia shrugged.

"I'd think it would be a no-brainer. Redemption, salvation… pain or peace…" she commented. Spike's eyes narrowed.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked. Cordelia threw her arms up.

"Oh come on, Spike. Use your brain. I know you're not as stupid as Angel likes to think you are. You didn't peroxide _all_ your brain cells out… Redemption is what Angel is doing. He's working to atone for his past sins. He's living through the pain in order to achieve his reward. Salvation _is_ the reward. It's peace," she told him. Spike let out a breath.

"So, it's the easy way or the hard way," he said. Cordelia nodded.

"That would be the gist of it," she told him. "Well… now that you've figured it out, I'm outta here…" Spike was looking at her when she disappeared, but it didn't register in his mind… it was already thinking through his choice.

The easy way – just let it be over with. Take his reward for saving the world and find peace. No living as a ghost, no living as a vampire… no living as a human. No pain. Just the fluffy clouds and angel's wings. The hard way – living as whatever they send him back as. Living in the world where there was no peace, where there was a constant battle between good and evil. Living with conscience, guilt, fear, anger, love, pain… the whole bloody gamut.

It wasn't an easy decision by any means. He wanted the peace. He wanted the free ticket to no worries, no eternal damnation, no _anything_. But when he thought he'd made his decision, the faces of Buffy, Dawn, Cordelia, Willow… even that wanker Xander went through his head. Leaving the world meant leaving everything that he'd been able to find. Friendship, acceptance, purpose… _love…_ But having all of that back meant being William the Bloody again. It meant having his past.

It took a few moments of internal struggle, but after a moment, Spike's shoulders dropped as he relaxed. It was time to do what he wanted, the world be damned…

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

"What are you doing here?" Angel asked softly as to not disturb his dozing son.

"I was supposed ta be here waitin' for ya, but the Powers told me I had ta make a quick stop…" Doyle explained. There was silence for a few moments as they both looked down at the child in the vampire's arms.

"What's going on, Doyle?"

"In your hands rests the fate of the world…"

"As usual," Angel muttered. Doyle chuckled as he looked once more down at the baby.

"It's why you're the champion, my friend…"

"You know, the whole 'fate in my hands' thing kind of gets old after a while," Angel grumbled. Doyle shrugged.

"Well, ya know… greater good, higher power, the good fight, right man for the job and all that… I actually had a dream once where I was the champ and _you_ were the sidekick…" the slighter man said. Angel looked over at him with a mixture of a glare and a look of amusement. "I was doin' a fair alright, too…"

"Ah, let me guess… saved the day? Got the girl? Rode off into the sunset?" Angel said, shifting baby Conner in his arms. Doyle frowned.

"Ya need a better imagination, my man. Of course I saved the day and got the girl. But there was more shacking up for a week or so than there was riding off into the sunset…" he said with a shameless grin. Angel chuckled.

"I think your imagination is dangerous enough for us both," he said with a shake of his head. Doyle nodded.

"Oh, aye… I'm sure o' that," he said. Angel sobered as he looked down at Conner.

"What's all this about, Doyle?" he asked. The half-demon turned a serious face to him.

"The moment o' truth is what it is. This is where all your Champion mettle is put to the test," he said.

"What are you talking about?" the vampire asked, but when he turned Doyle was gone. Angel rolled his eyes.

"Typical. Give a cryptic warning and then disappear… The Powers are good at that…" he muttered. He looked around the room and saw nothing that could be classified as 'mettle-testing'.

"Dad…" Conner's voice suddenly wafted to him. Angel turned. There, standing down the long hallway was an image of teenaged Conner. But it wasn't the Conner he knew. This Conner looked happy… he looked the way that Angel had _thought_ he'd left him with his new family. He looked the way Angel _wanted_ him to look…

The child that had been cradled lovingly in Angel's arms was now gone. With panic, Angel spun in circles, looking for the innocent baby. Instead, he came face to face with Conner. Angry Conner. Angel's gaze snapped back to the hallway. His Conner stood there still, waiting.

"_Dad_…" angry Conner sneered, drawing his father's attention back to him. "Are you here to fix me? We both know I'm hopeless… are you going to help me?" Angel reached forward and grasped his son's shoulder. The teenager flung himself away.

"Don't _touch_ me," he hissed.

"I want to help you," Angel said. Conner sneered.

"Well, I'd rather kill you. I'll kill you all," he seethed. His hand tightened around the hilt of his sword and swung up. Angel prepared to block but all motion stopped. His son was stilled, the sword stopping only inches from Angel's head. The vampire let out the unneeded breath he'd sucked in on instinct. His eyes were locked on his son's own murderous gaze.

"This is your chance, Angel. There are two ways you can go from here. You can save your son, or you can kill your son," Doyle said, re-appearing at Angel's side. "The choices have been made, the souls have worked together and the power has been released. It is now up to you…" Angel's brow furrowed in confusion.

"What do you mean it's up to me?" he asked. Doyle just smiled.

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

**A/N: For those of you that are nitpicky… the language of the spell is Gaelic, but with a slight twist in the words to make it fit the story. Don't take it literally, it's not supposed to correct, real-life Gaelic. And a fun fact… The newt bit at the beginning was a tribute to the ever wonderful Monty Python (I was watching it while writing!)… _"She turned me into a newt…"_ everyone stares _"… I got better…" _Teehee… Gotta love the Monty… Review and let me know how you liked this part! I have to beg all the reviews I can get at this point, the show's almost over! The fat lady is getting ready to sing! It's almost all she wrote! Eh, and all the rest of those euphemisms for the word 'end'… Later:)**


	24. Part XXIV

**A/N: Ya'll are going to hate me… I'll start my apologies now, just to soften the blow a little bit for later on… :)**

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

"What does that smile mean?" Angel asked Doyle. The man cleared his throat and shifted uncomfortably on his feet.

"It means exactly what I told you. Your choice is to save your son or kill your son. I'm not mincin' words about it or bein' cryptic. The catch is, because there always is one, is that in order to save your son, you will have to sacrifice who you are. Either that, or you can just kill the nipper here and now. It's really up ta you…" Doyle said. Angel frowned as he thought over Doyle's words.

"Ah, the frown… Can't say as I've missed the frown," the half-demon chuckled.

"Sacrifice who I am? What is that supposed to mean?" Angel asked. Doyle looked over at him.

"Not ta be a downer, oh Ye of Eternal Brooding, but what do ya think it means? It's not a simple case of sayin' farewell ta your morals, or your humanity… hell, it's not even askin' ya ta die…" he said. Angel looked at him. Doyle held up his hands, "… at least not in the actual dyin' sense, anyway…"

"My soul…" the vampire said. Doyle grinned.

"Ding ding! We've got a winner folks… tell him what he's won…" he said.

"Eternal damnation," Angel replied. Doyle gave him a look.

"If that's what you're thinkin', then I'm afraid I'll be putting in a bit of overtime on this here mission," he said.

"If not eternal damnation, then what?" Angel asked. "I'd be giving up my soul. The Powers simply wouldn't let Angelus run around L.A after I'm gone…"

"Depends on what your definition of damnation is, me friend. Yes, you'd be givin' up your soul. Yes, you'd be givin' it up ta save the world and your son in one fell swoop. And, of course, everythin' else you'll be givin' up. But damnation? You of all people know what that feels like, and I doubt this would rival it," Doyle said. At Doyle's words, Cordelia's face, Cordelia's voice, and her laughter filled his head. Wes' 'eurekas', Gunn's sarcastic comments, Fred's wordy explanations, and yes… even Lorne's spontaneous combustions he called song filled his ears. He would be giving up his family. He would be giving up all chance of his redemption. He would be giving up the chance of his shanshu.

"I know what I'll be giving up. And you may not call it damnation, but I do," he said. Doyle shrugged.

"Who am I ta say what's what. I'm dead… So, I'm assumin' that you've come ta some sort of conclusion then?" he asked. Angel looked at his son.

"I can't kill him, Doyle. That's asking the impossible of me. If my soul will save his, then I'll do it," he said.

"Nothing is as pure as a parent's love for their child…" Doyle commented with a shake of his head. "… or in this case, a vampire's love for it's hell-spawn…" Angel gave a small growl. Doyle held up his hands in surrender.

"Fine, fine… the former, then…"

"What about the others?" Angel asked. Doyle smiled.

"They'll be alright. Spike, Buffy and Cordelia each made their choices; they each made their own sacrifices. Those choices allowed you ta make yours," he said. Angel's frown deepened.

"I don't understand," he said.

"Well, I was hopin' you'd be taken me word on it, but I guess it's story time… The way it worked was that the dark o' their souls were banished away if they so chose, and in doing that, banished the Senior Partners from unitin' that dark. If they'd chosen different, any one of them, it would have given the baddies the power ta control Conner's soul. In destroyin' Conner, they would have succeeded in destroyin' the world by unleashin' his particular brand of dark," Doyle told him.

"What… what did they sacrifice?" Angel asked, worry tingeing his voice. Doyle shook his head.

"Can't tell ya that, Angel," he said with regret.

"If I'm sacrificing my soul here, don't you think I deserve something? Peace of mind, maybe?" the vampire asked.

"Did ya not hear me earlier when I said they'd be alright? Is that not enough peace of mind for ya?" Doyle asked. Angel thought for a second. More than anything, he wanted to know if Cordelia was going to be alright.

"I guess not," he answered.

"Well, you're out o' luck. Mum's the word and there's not a thing I can do about it," the half-demon said. Angel couldn't help the ache he felt at those words, but he knew that he wasn't going to get anything else out of his old friend.

"Then I guess that's really all we need to talk about then, isn't it?" he asked, straightening his shoulders.

"You've made your decision?" Doyle asked, eyes wide. The vampire nodded.

"I have…" he said. The half-demon studied his friend for a moment or two with troubled eyes. But then he, too, straightened and put on his game face.

"That's why all of us up here call you the Champ, Champ…" Doyle said with a smile. "You know what you have to do…" Angel nodded as he looked over his still son.

"Do it," Angel said. Doyle snapped his fingers and disappeared. Angry Conner suddenly burst back into motion, his sword crashing down. But rather than deflect it, Angel let it follow its path. It went right through the vampire. Conner's eyes went wide in shock as the metal of his sword met the stone floor with a loud 'clang.'

"What have you done? Who are you?" the boy asked. Angel looked back to where the other form of his son still stood, waiting. Then, the vampire directed his attention to the Conner standing in front of him.

"I'm your father… and I'm going to take you home," he said. With that, Angel put his hands on his son's shoulder and a light enveloped them. Conner's eyes widened as Angel led him down the long hallway. They met up with the other Conner and without much pause, the two Conner's became one.

"Where are we going?" Conner asked, all anger, all hardness completely gone from his visage. Angel smiled as his arm went around his son's shoulders as they walked towards a door that the vampire hadn't seen there before.

"We're going somewhere nice… away from all of this…" The door closed behind them.

"Good luck to ya Champ…" Doyle's voice floated through the now-empty room.

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

"Well, this was a crappy place to bring me back to!" Cordelia complained as she suddenly found herself behind the group that was surrounding her friends.

"You can say that again, luv. Couldn't they have at least gotten rid of all the baddies? You know, as a 'thank you'?" Spike's voice startled her. She turned to look at him.

"Where'd you come from?" she asked. Spike shrugged.

"Your guess is as good as mine," he said.

"Are you two just going to stand there and chat all day, or are we going to go help them?" Buffy's voice asked. The two spun to look at the blonde standing slightly off to the side.

"I suppose we can go save them from certain death," Spike answered. Cordelia looked around.

"We don't have any weapons," she commented.

"Well, Fists of Fury here can lead us off and we can follow in and tidy up," Spike suggested. Buffy rolled her eyes.

"Thanks," she said. Cordelia eyed the group of vampires who had yet to know they were there.

"It's the best we got. And we have the element of surprise. Plus, Buffster's the Slayer and Spike… you're a ghost. The only person I'm really concerned about is my human self," she said. Buffy let out a snort.

"Typical…" she said. Cordelia gave her a look.

"Well, we can continue on with this clever conversation or we can jump into the fight," she said.

"Fine, let's go," Buffy said, leading the charge. She tapped two vampires on their shoulders and waved to them before she pummeled them to the ground. Spike and Cordelia followed suit. It took Cordelia a bit longer, but with the staving tactics Angel had showed her she finally got the upper hand and took the vampire down. Spike easily dispatched two vampires as well, but caught a hard blow to the face from a vampire that had snuck behind him.

"Bloody hell!" he exclaimed as he recoiled. His hand went up to the corner of his lip and it came away with blood. His eyes went wide and he hissed as the pain radiated from the injury. With a growl, he wiped the blood off and rushed the vampire that had attacked him.

After a few minutes, the three of them joined the others.

"Ah, reinforcements!" Lorne cried out from under one of the zombies that was trying to choke him to death.

"Nice of you to join us," Wes called out as he dusted one of the vampires with a broken torch.

"Sorry we're late… life altering decisions to be made and all that," Cordelia said as she kicked the zombie off of Lorne. She gave him a helping hand to stand up and he quickly straightened his suit.

"Good to see you in one piece, Cordilicious… in your fully human, non-Seer, no-death-imminent self…" he said. Cordelia shrugged before she reached over and picked up a still flaming torch.

"I have other things to live for," she said. Lorne smiled.

"Good to see you've figured that out… finally," he said.

"Yeah, well, I can be pretty slow when it comes to important things," she commented as she reached out and set two vampires on fire when their attention was diverted. Lorne let out a snort.

"Hello, operator? The obvious has just been stated…" the demon said. Cordelia just smiled at him. After a moment or two of smoldering, the vampires both exploded into dust. The remaining vampires, seeing that they didn't have the advantage any more, ran from the chamber. The zombies, on the other hand, continued to approach.

"We need to find where the zombie's hearts are being kept. Otherwise, we'll never get out of here without them coming after us," Wes said as he hacked one of them to pieces. Lindsey straightened his shoulders.

"I'll do it," he said. The AI gang looked between them in surprise.

"Do you know where they keep them?" the Englishman asked, turning to the other man. Lindsey nodded.

"I used to work here, you know. In fact, before I became the 'golden boy', as you so put it, I used to be on the harvesting squad," he said.

"Starting young, were we? Some kids have sports, some have after school programs, and some kids have _parents_… Lawyer-boy had the 'harvesting squad'," Gunn said. Lindsey gave the other man a look.

"Have I told you how much I don't like you?" he asked. Gunn reached up to put a hand over his heart.

"My heart's breaking…" he said. Reaching out, Lindsey snatched Gunn's axe from him.

"Hey…" the black man started.

"Trust me. I'll be needing it more than you will," the ex-lawyer said. Gunn, not sure whether to take that in a good way or a bad way, stayed silent.

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

_Second level of Wolfram and Hart…_

It was weird for him to be wandering around Wolfram and Hart as a part of the "good" side. It wasn't that he was "evil" during his time within these walls… it was just that he'd been younger and a little less without a conscience. If only he'd known that he'd be somehow tethered to this place after he'd left it behind, he never would have stepped into the Armani suits and expensive Italian leather shoes.

He should have known that this was the way it was going to end up. Lindsey McDonald was a good ol' boy from south Texas supplanted in big city L.A. Ambition brought him here at an early age… too early an age, if he were honest. Ambition drove his father to an early grave, and if he wasn't careful, it was going to do the same thing to him – albeit not _quite_ the same way it had Pop.

Lindsey's grip tightened on the borrowed axe. He'd help Angel and his little gang of do-gooders and then go back to his comfortable, north-side apartment where his girl was waiting for him. Life could go back to normal without the headaches, the surveillance, the threats, the never-ending reminders… No more living life case to case, wondering if he was going to be able to wake up the next morning. From the moment they defeated the damned Senior Partners, he would go back to being normal Lindsey McDonald.

One more turn and he knew he was only a corridor away from where he remembered Wolfram and Hart held the zombie unit. He remembered his first day on that specific squad. The firm required them to scour the graveyards for fresh graves – and in L.A., they were not difficult to find – and perform the spells to bring forth the zombies. Then they had to harvest the organs before they rose. It was a grueling, often disgusting job. But it had gotten him his foot in the door at Wolfram and Hart. In the space of just a few months, he was placed in charge of the unit. His numbers greatly improved and the Senior Partners, pleased with his initiative and diligent work, had him placed under Holland Manners at Special Projects as an intern. The rest, they say, was history.

He knew this room like the back of his hand, yet being here when there was no one else around was slightly intimidating. Especially since he was here for an entirely different reason than why he'd been here before. His eyes wandered and he couldn't help but be curious as to who they put in charge of this show. But that thought was only fleeting as he approached the rows upon rows of urns specially made for the purpose of holding zombie hearts.

Learning from past mishaps – the zombie "project" at the LAPD, to be exact – Lindsey knew that there was now a magical barrier around the urns to protect them from anyone wishing to destroy them. A key pad beckoned to him from across the room and he approached it with the confidence only a former lawyer from Wolfram and Hart could possess. He typed in the password that he'd used in the past. It was wrong of course. But Lindsey knew the way the firm worked and with a smirk, he typed in the six letter replacement. Lights went on and there was a flash as the magical barrier was removed.

With a tight grip on the axe, Lindsey could only think that it would have been smarter for Wolfram and Hart to kill him.

"That can be arranged…" a voice said. Lindsey's eyes shot to the door.

"Happen to be a mind reader back in your hey day?" he asked one of the four zombies standing at the door.  
"Yes," the zombie answered. Lindsey shook his head.

"Did you not sense the sarcasm in the question?" he asked snottily. "I really don't care whether you were or not…"

"It makes no matter to me. You will die either way," the zombie said before closing in on the ex-lawyer.

"Time to take out some aggression," Lindsey muttered to himself as the zombies approached him. One of them reached for him, but with a swing of the axe Lindsey took off its arm. Then, he reached out and gripped the zombie's shirt and flung him into one of the shelves. All the jars that sat there fell to the ground and shattered. Lindsey smirked.

"I guess we'll just play eenie-meenie until we get lucky," he said before he reached out and grabbed the second zombie's shirt and immediately flung him into the other row of urns. That, too, crashed to the floor. The first zombie writhed on the floor for a moment or two before he went still.

"Well, one for four," he said. The third zombie growled as he reached for Lindsey and the fourth moved around to flank him from the opposite side. Rather than try to hit the zombies, Lindsey spun around with the axe, the wide blade hitting a large number of urns. A number of them shattered as they hit the marble floor. The zombie that had been stealthily moving closer fell to the ground and his eyes closed.

"Two for four… not doing too bad," he said. A fist caught him on the side of the face, forcing the cockiness to take the back seat for the moment. Lindsey's ear rung a little bit from the zombie's blow, but he immediately sliced it in half. With a quick kick, he shoved the other zombie down to the floor. Taking advantage of the freedom, Lindsey ran to the other row and immediate began smashing the line of jars. He finished one side and was about to start smashing the other side when the last zombie grabbed a hold of his throat.

Using everything in him, Lindsey swung his arms and legs hoping one of them would find purchase as he dangled from the zombie's grip. His finger brushed the cool clay of one of the urns and he swung for it again. It fell to the ground and shattered without incident. Lindsey struggled harder as the zombie's grip tightened, hoping to hit another target. After a moment or two, one of his legs connected. There was another crash as a jar met its unfortunate end. Still, nothing. With a growl of frustration, Lindsey swung the axe up and it connected with the zombie's face. The grip at his throat lessened and Lindsey took advantage as he pulled the zombie with him a few steps down. His arms flung out and took out two more jars. Nothing. Hoping to get lucky, Lindsey flung the axe down the row. It took out six urns in its path. Closing his eyes, he knew that the zombie would either finish him off or drop dead. It took a second or two, but it was finally the latter. The grip dropped away from his throat and Lindsey fell to the floor, gasping. He took a moment to regroup before he stood up and looked around.

He let out a sigh as he saw all of the jars on the floor. It was done. Without a backward glance, he walked to the exit. As he made his way out, Lindsey picked up the sword that hung near the door. Before this was all over, he was pretty sure he was going to need another weapon.

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

The gang was about to start out but the fire roared back to life and a horrendous gale of wind started to whip around the chamber.

"What the hell's happening?" Cordelia cried as the wind picked up even more, her hair whisking painfully into her face.

"The world's ending," Lilah's voice rang through the room over the sound of the wind. Everyone spun around to see Lilah standing at the doorway with three others - a normal-looking man in a suit, an ancient-looking vampire, and a three-horned, dark blue demon that looked to be about eight feet tall.

"How does it feel to be only a few seconds from the end of your very existence?" the man in a suit asked.

"I could ask you the same question," Cordelia said. The man smiled and lifted a hand. The entire AI gang was suddenly lifted off their feet in an invisible choke hold.

"Let… me guess… the… Senior Partners," Gunn choked out as his hands scrambled to his throat.

"Got it in one. Impressive," Lilah said with a cold smile.

"You've been playing us, haven't you? You were never working with us before," Wes said, hand at his throat as well. Lilah looked at him, a colder smile in place.

"Who said I was?" she asked. Wes' face went stony. Any emotion he may have ever felt for her was completely wiped away. "I never does any good to assume, Wesley. Just because we were sleeping with the enemy doesn't mean that things change. I never assumed you would join Wolfram and Hart… why would you think a heartless bitch like myself would ever change?"

"Angelus did good to kill you," Wes said, jaw clenched as he struggled against the invisible grip. Lilah just smiled again.

"Ah, but it wasn't Angelus. It was Cordelia…" she said, looking at the girl. Cordelia's face didn't change from its hateful stare.

"It wasn't me. You of all people know that," she said with surprising evenness. Lilah shrugged.

"It really doesn't matter much anymore, no does it?" she asked. "I must say, I do enjoy watching you squirm. Too bad I couldn't watch a little bit more…" The woman then turned to the other three.

"Finish it. Kill them," she said.

"We must wait. The end of the world is near… let them perish with the rest," the demon said. Lilah rolled her eyes.

"Why take any chances. Just kill them all right now…" she said. The vampire nodded.

"I agree with Ms. Morgan. Kill them now," he said in his gravelly voice.

"No. We will wait. It will be symbolic that the soul they tried to save will end up bringing their ruin," the man said with an evil smile. Suddenly, the wind stopped and everyone was dropped to the ground. The man gave Lilah a feral look.

"What's happened?" he asked her before trying once more to control the gang. The former lawyer glared around the room to where everyone was now getting to their feet slowly.

"What's _happened_!" the man asked again, except a little more impatient with the lack of answers. Cordelia laughed.

"What's happened is you're ass is grass. You've got nothing… The world isn't going to end today," she said. Lilah glared at the other woman.

"You haven't won. It may be a delay, but we will see the end of the world… today. Kill them and then let's finish this," she sneered to her counterparts.

"I don't think so," a voice said. Lilah spun around, only to have a sword pierce her stomach. Her eyes went wide.

"Lindsey!" Lilah sputtered out, blood coating her lips. He gave her a wry smile.

"I'd say bon voyage, but where you're going I doubt it's going to be anywhere near pleasant," Lindsey said as he pushed the sword deeper into the mortal Lilah's abdomen. With a last look at the woman who'd been his partner in crime yet not, he pulled the metal from her dying body. He looked to where everyone stood, eyes gaping, and tossed Gunn his axe.

"They're mortal…" he said. "Whatever mojo just happened made them mortal…" Buffy, taking no chances, flipped up a make-shift stake and let it sail through the air, hitting her vampire target directly in the heart. His stunned face was the last they saw of him as he evaporated into dust. The other two looked between themselves and immediately ran for the door.

Spike grabbed the sword from Lindsey's hand and whipped it through the air. It caught the demon in the middle of the back and pinned him to the wall. Spike smirked as he made his way over to his query. His fist smashed into the demon's face, rendering it unconscious.

"Bollocks!" he yelled as pain from hitting the demon's deceptively hard exoskeleton radiated through his fingers. Buffy sucked in a breath as she made her way to him.

"You're… you're completely solid," she commented. Spike winced as he flexed his fingers.

"With pain and everything else… but it's best saved for a rainy day, luv. We've got other things to worry about right now…" he said. Gunn grunted as he swung his axe and quickly took off the demon's head.

"It's kind of surreal that we've just pretty much defeated the Senior Partners," Fred commented, dusting herself off.

"Yeah, but we've got to find that other guy," Gunn said. "Who knows where he's run off too."

"Yes, well, let's be off. We'll probably have to split up to locate him," Wes said.

"Let's finish this," Cordelia said, removing the sword from the wall and heading for the door. Just as they were about to make their way back up into Wolfram and Hart, an invisible force flung them all backwards and into the stone wall. Everyone was suitably knocked unconscious.

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

**A/N – One more chapter… just ONE (thank the Powers)! How cool is that? As I said in the previous author's note, you are probably going to hate me when this is all through, but I've prepared myself for this (not really, though). Hate me all you need to after the next (and final) part…**


	25. Part XXV

**A/N – Please be kind at the end of this… I've apologized early to get everyone's mind wrapped around all the possibilities. Hopefully, you've expected worse and it turns out to be a relief, but that may be wishful thinking. Anyways…**

**Enjoy the last bit (be prepared, it's longer than average) and make sure you tell me if you liked it!**

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

Cordelia's eyes opened slowly and the world began to right itself. She could hear groans from her friends as they all stood up around her. Voices started to become distinguishable.

"How we haven't had millions of concussions by now, I'll never know," Gunn complained.

"What the bloody hell happened? I didn't become solid just to be thrown about like a sodding rag doll…" Spike grumbled as he rubbed his head. Lorne clucked his tongue as he looked around.

"Well, well, well… The Powers That Be stepped in have vanquished the Partners That Aren't. I say we party… this calls for a drink. Something stronger than a Seabreeze, of course. Maybe tequila, straight from the bottle," Lorne said as he rubbed his head.

"What happened?" Cordelia asked as she stood up and worked the kinks out of her neck.

"The spell worked," Wes said as he looked around the now-empty room. "Conner's soul defeated the Partners…" Cordelia looked around as well.

"Where _is_ Conner? Shouldn't he be back with us?" she asked. The demon looked around, eyes squinted in concentration.

"He's gone," Lorne said, helping Fred to her feet.

"Great, where'd he run off to now? I have a feeling that we can't hang around this joint much longer," Gunn said.

"He's gone… just… gone," Lorne reiterated as his eyes roamed the room. Cordelia's own eyes went wide.

"You mean…" she started. Lorne nodded sadly in confirmation. The brunette looked around again. There was Buffy, there was Spike – looking more solid than he should in his ghost-like condition – and there was Gunn, Wes, Lorne, Fred and Lindsey.

"Angel?" she called, wanting him to make all the confusion better. She turned to take survey of the entire room. Not seeing the dark form of her vampire, Cordelia spun back to Lorne. How had they _not_ realized that he was not there? The demon's red eyes were even sadder and she felt a stabbing pain all over her body. He wasn't there.

"Bring him back," she said softly but with ice. She looked between the demon and Wes. "You bring him back right now!" The last word echoed in the large room.

"I can't Cordy," Wes said in a quiet voice.

"What do you mean? Use your pretty words from that stupid spell… reverse it! Bring Angel back!" Cordelia's voice was taking on a hysterical pitch. Fred brought a hand to her mouth to stifle the sob that threatened to come out.

"The father's soul will carry the son home…" Wes said softly.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Buffy asked, leaning against Spike as the ache in her heart increased.

"That was the last line of the spell… the prophecy. It means that Angel had to sacrifice his soul to save Conner's. They are both in a good place," he said. Cordelia's knees went slightly weak and the ex-Watcher reached out and pulled her close to him.

"Why?" she asked no one in particular as her forehead found Wes' shoulder.

"Angel was a champion, Cordy. We all knew that he may not survive one of the apocalypses. And in the end, it was his choice," he said. Buffy nodded.

"Even I was meant to die," she said. Cordelia's head shot up to look at the blond girl.

"But you came back," she said, a spark lighting her eyes. Buffy looked at Spike and then looked back to Cordelia.

"Yeah, I did. But with dark magic," she said. The spark in Cordelia's eyes died, but she still stared at Buffy.

"But you came back," she said again, petulantly, reminding everyone of a little girl trying to deny something that hurt. Anything anyone wanted to say was cut off as the floor began to rumble. The walls around them shook violently.

"Earthquake?" Fred asked. Gunn snorted.

"Not with our luck. It's never as simple as that," he said. Wes' head spun around to locate the door.

"Gunn's instinct was correct. We can't stay here. We've got to get out," he said. The group began running towards the door.

"I don't think we're going to make it out in time," Buffy said. Spike looked over his shoulder at her.

"I didn't become solid just to die in a crazy law firm," he said. She smiled at him and squeezed his hand as he pulled her along. If they survived this, she would have to have a long talk with him…

"Left, Gunn! Left!" Wes cried to his friend as they rushed through the hallways. "Don't you remember how we came in?"

"Well excuse me for being in a slight panic. My brain isn't exactly working top-notch right now," he yelled back.

"Stop with the arguing! More with the running!" Cordelia yelled at them both. A few more turns got them to the stairway to the main level. With a hard swallow, Cordelia started up them, trying to block out the amount they'd have to climb. When they all reached the top, the stood at the door for a second to catch their breath. As they turned to go down the next hallway, Gunn let out a groan.

"Does anyone else feel like they're chasing the smell of cheese?" he asked.

"Now that I think about it, I don't remember it being this hard to get in," Lorne said.

"Yeah, well, time wasn't _exactly_ of the essence then," Lindsey commented. The demon watched as the framed pictures they ran by fell to the floor and the plants decorating the hallway tipped over.

"True," the demon responded as they turned another corner. They all let out a sigh of relief as they entered the spacious lobby. Lighting fixtures were falling and sparking as they ran through it, ducking as a crash sounded close by. It seemed like the run to the front door took place in slow motion. Not sure exactly what was happening, all they knew was that they needed to get out.

There was a collective sigh of relief as they finally made their way outside and safely a few hundred yards away from the skyscraper.

"Look!" Fred cried turning back to look at the building they'd just escaped.

They all turned and watched, panting at the exertion, while the building began to crack and crumble. Rather than crash to the ground though, the Wolfram and Hart logo was stripped away as if it wasn't hundreds of pounds of marble and the building structure twisted and contorted to become another building altogether. What had once been the center of all things evil was now a local television station. The gang watched with unfazed eyes. There was silence as they all took in the new scenery.

"Kind of anticlimactic, don't you think?" Fred asked.

"After all the pain, suffering and hard work, you'd think we'd be rewarded with an explosion or something…" Gunn grumbled. Cordelia, through it all, stayed quiet. Rather than say anything, she turned on her heel and started walking. Just down the street was Angel's convertible.

"We've defeated Wolfram and Hart… what next?" Lorne asked.

"Disneyland?" Gunn asked.

"How about Cancun?" Fred asked.

"If we're going on a trip, I suggest Fiji," Wes said.

"Hawaii."

"Australia."

"Japan…" Everyone looked at Spike as they all climbed in to the vehicle. "What? I've never been there." Cordelia gripped the steering wheel.

"Home…" she said softly, but everyone heard her loud and clear and was instantly quiet. She started the car in that moment of silence and pulled away. The only person to look back was Lindsey… and even then, he had a relieved expression on his face.

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

They all walked tiredly into the hotel. Gunn, Fred and Lorne immediately collapsed onto the circular couch.

"There's no place like anywhere that's not Wolfram and Hart…" Lorne groaned.

"I can't believe that Angel…" Fred started before she took a breath. "… isn't here." Gunn put his arm around her and hugged her to his side. Wes gave everyone a warning glance before he turned to look at Cordelia. Her eyes were roaming over every inch of the hotel lobby.

"Cordelia…" Wes said, his eyes finally catching hers. He knew full well that she was on the verge of a breakdown. And he knew her well enough to know that she wouldn't want to be the center of attention with everyone's eyes on her when it occurred. Wes reached out and gently took her arm, leading her into his office.

"Are you alright, Cordy?" he asked, closing the door behind them. Cordelia shook her head.

"No, I'm… I'm not alright," she said. Her voice hitched just as a tear finally escaped.

"Is there anything I can do?" he asked. She let out a watery laugh.

"Yeah… you can turn back time so we can fix a few things…" she said. Wes smiled a pain-filled smile as his friend collapsed into a chair.

"I would if I could," he said. Cordelia let out a sigh as she put her face in her hands. Things were quiet for a moment before she let out another, heavier breath. Her hands began to tremble as all her emotions fought for release.

"We all chose to come back," she finally sobbed out. Wes immediately went to her and pulled her into an embrace. "Angel sacrificed himself for Conner and we all chose to live. If that isn't the most selfish thing I've ever been a part of, I don't know what is…" Wes hugged her tighter.

"It was not selfish, Cordelia," he said in a harsher voice than he intended. "What you did was choose a path. Because Angel made the ultimate sacrifice in order to save his son does not mean that your decisions were any less of a sacrifice." Cordelia looked up at him with hopeful, watery eyes. Wes smiled down at her as he squeezed her arm.

"You gave up your visions. We all know how much those meant to you. Buffy gave up peace in heaven and will continue to be the Slayer. Spike gave up immediate absolution in order to atone for his crimes…" he said. "You all had the easy way out, really. Even you, although you probably don't see it as such. You chose to come back to the world and continue to fight. Angel would be proud… _so_ proud…" The ex-Watcher's voice cracked slightly with emotion causing Cordelia to look up at him. His eyes were as watery as hers.

"I love you, Wes. I know we don't say that to each other because it makes things so…" she struggled to find a word.

"Real?" he asked. Her eyes met his.

"Yes. It makes all the danger so real. But I need you to hear it and to know it. You are the brother I never had, the best friend I never had and…" she broke off, her eyes tearing up again. Wes pulled her into another hug.

"I know Cordelia. And I love you too. We may not be related by blood, but you are more family to me than my actual family," he said. They stood like that for a few more minutes.

"Thank you, Wes. It means a lot to hear you say that…" she said. Wes smiled a slight smile.

"Yes, well… we all tended to be misfits within our own families, standing out for one reason or another. It made sense we all came to care so much about each other. We had no one else. And I don't want you to think that you don't have anyone else to lean on now that Angel is… gone…" he said, looking to the floor in his own sadness. Cordelia laid a hand on his arm.

"I know. I know I'll always have you guys there to back me up. We all have grieving to do, in our own ways. We just have to avoid the kid gloves and talk about it when we need to," she told him. Wes nodded.

"That is a brilliant suggestion; let's see if we can hold to it. We all tend to be a bit… stubborn," he said. Cordelia's lip twitched at the statement of the obvious. Then her face went serious again.

"Speaking of grieving… I think I'm going to go get a head start," she said.

"I think you have one already," Wes said, "All over the front of my shirt…" Cordelia looked down at the tear-stained shirt. Then, looked at all of the dirt and blood and whatever else had deigned to make its presence known.

"I think that's the least of your problems right now," she commented with a small smile. Then, she turned and opened the office door. Six sets of eyes immediate looked to her. Cordelia swallowed the lump in her throat at the concern radiating her way.

"I think I'm going to go lay down," Cordelia said to her silent friends. They all watched her as she made her way up the stairs. Away from their probing eyes, she slowly made her way down the well-traveled hallway and to the only room she wanted to be in. Without hesitation, she pulled down the comforter and sheets and buried herself beneath the familiar blankets. They still smelled like him, after all this time… Her still-dry cheek rested against the soft pillow as she stared at nothing.

_Powers help me… what do I do now?_

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

"Is she going to be alright?" Fred asked quietly. Wes' eyes stayed on the stairway where Cordelia had disappeared.

"I don't know right now, Fred. I don't know," he told her. "But it's probably best to let her alone for a bit. Let her mourn… let us all mourn."

"Kitten just lost her Angel. He was with her since the beginning. It may be a while before she's alright again," Lorne said sadly. "Her aura's bleeding right now…" There was a groan from the peanut gallery and the gang turned to look at the ex-lawyer.

"Uggg… I don't think I need to stick around for this Dr. Phil moment…" Lindsey said.

"You're leaving?" Fred asked. Lindsey gave her a look.

"Did you think I was going to stick around and be a part of your 'Save the World' club? I don't think so. I just got out of one lifetime contract. There's no way in hell I'm going to sign on for another one… besides, I've got better things to do and better places to be," he said. Gunn rolled his eyes.

"And for a split second there, I though he may actually be an okay person," he said. Lindsey sneered at him.

"Wishful thinking on your part… Whatever you do, don't ever come looking for me. I'd prefer to sink into oblivion. Completely off the radar from both sides…" he said.

"Don't worry, we'll all forget your name the second you walk out that door," Gunn said. Lorne scoffed.

"I won't… well, maybe I will… but I won't forget that voice," the demon said. Lindsey smirked at that.

"Where are you going to go?" Fred asked the ex-lawyer.

"That's for me to know and you to never find out. Don't be offended when I say I never want to see any of you again… well, actually, I really don't care if you are offended…" Lindsey said with a shrug before turning and going to the door. The rest of the gang looked amongst themselves for a second before Wes cleared his throat. Lindsey's hand paused on the door.

"Thank you for your help," he said. Lindsey didn't turn around, but he didn't say anything scathing either. Instead, he walked out without another word. It was enough of a 'your welcome' for the Angel Investigations gang.

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

It had taken a long while for Cordelia to finally fall off into a fitful sleep. But when she did, she found herself dreaming.

"Cordelia…" a voice reverberated through her mind. "… open your eyes…" She did. And when she looked around, she saw that she was in the Hyperion's courtyard.

"Cordelia," the voice said again. Her eyes searched out the source and they fell on the one person she wanted to see more than anything.

"Angel," she said with a relieved smile. The sun shone in his dark hair and he stood in its warm light as if he belonged there. "They told me you were gone…" Angel crossed the small space of land that separated them to where she stood. The sun played naturally across his features, unlike it had the few times he'd actually stood in its light. Cordelia's heart swelled at the picture of the man standing in front of her.

"I am," he said softly. "I am gone, Cor." The happiness she'd felt evaporated.

"No, you're not. You're here with me right now," she said, taking one of his hands in both of hers. Angel smiled as he lifted his free hand to her cheek.

"I'll always be with you," he said. His fingertips ran gently over the soft skin of her face. Tears welled up in her brown eyes.

"That is the stupidest cliché in the whole damn world. I don't care if you're in my heart or my mind or my soul. You were there already. You're not with me unless you are _here_ with me where I can touch you, hold you and kiss you. I need you here… we only just started loving each other!" she pleaded. Angel smiled again.

"Cor, if you think back, you'll see we always loved each other, even when we didn't know it," he said. Cordelia shook her head.

"It's not enough," she told him, a tear spilling over. Angel let out a sigh as he pulled her close.

"It's never enough. It's never nearly enough," he admitted.

"I love you," she said as she pulled back slightly to look at him. "I love you more than Buffy ever could. I want you to know that." Angel shook his head with a chuckle.

"Can't let that go, can you? Not even in _your_ dream…" he commented. Cordelia gave him a small shadow of her normally bright smile.

"I can't help it. I think Buffy competition is part of my DNA," she said. Angel leaned forward and gave her a gentle, loving kiss.

"I love you. Only you. Buffy is meant for something else," he said after stepping back. "I don't believe in fate all that much, but something was meant for us… even before we met here in L.A. Even during the years in Sunnydale. That's clear to me now."

"But you're gone. I don't know what I'm going to do now," she said, leaning her forehead against his shoulder.

"Fight. You're going to fight," Angel answered for her.

"The mission…" she started, slightly muffled against his shirt. Angel nodded.

"Yes, the mission. You are the heart… of our family, of Angel Investigations… There is nothing more important than the fight… Even _us_…" he said. Cordelia's eyes looked up into his. She wanted to deny it, to yell out that nothing was as important as the two of them being together, but she couldn't.

"Deep down, I know that. But I can't help but be selfish and want you here with me until I'm all old and wrinkly," she said. Angel smiled. The Cordelia of old would have never said she'd ever be 'old and wrinkly'. It was a testament to how much she'd really changed.

"I can be selfish and want to be there with you too. But that's not the way this is going to work out right now. You need to be the team's strength. You need to pull them together, every single one of them. It's going to be difficult for you all. Some may stay, some may go – it's their free will – but in the end, sacrifices were made and they weren't made in vain. And you may even find allies among the rebels… if you look. We are all where we are for a reason. And I trust you with the mission; otherwise, I wouldn't have done what I did," he told her. Cordelia understood. She could yearn to _not_ understand all she wanted, but she knew. Angel was right. He did what he had to do, and now, she had to do what she needed to do.

"I know, Angel," she said. Angel smiled, knowing that she meant it and knowing that she was going to be alright.

"Good. Now… it's time for me to go," he said, stepping back from her. She reached out and took his hand.

"I love you. I don't know what I'm going to do without you," she said. He reached up and touched her cheek.

"I love you too," he said before kissing her lightly. Then, he was gone.

**X:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:X**

Cordelia woke up with the taste of salty tears on her lips and tear tracks marring her cheeks. The ache in her chest told her she'd been sobbing. She didn't remember sobbing… With a rough hand, she wiped away the tear tracks and sat up in the bed. Her hands ran over the soft bed covers and let memory take over for a moment. She remembered all the times Angel let her take over this very bed when her vision pain became too much. She remembered spending evenings feeding Conner here, next to Angel. She remembered all the times Angel brought her here because he felt she'd be safer here.

She let out a sigh as she finally kicked the covers back and she stood up to stretch. The dream came back to her all of a sudden and she knew that she was needed downstairs. Angel Investigations was without its namesake, but that didn't mean that it was without its purpose.

Cordelia knew she wasn't okay, but in time, she could probably get there. She also knew that the team wasn't okay either. But they'd get there as well. Angel had passed the torch onto them and that was what she needed to tell them. They could pull together in their grief, and in that midst, they could make the team stronger. They may have lost their Champion, but that didn't mean there weren't other warriors out there.

Cordelia let out a sigh at the thought of trying to convince Buffy to stay. She knew the Slayer had been through a lot, and she knew that Buffy deserved a real life. If Buffy didn't stay, Cordelia wasn't sure how long the gang would last on their own. But as soon as that thought slipped out, Angel's voice echoed through her mind. _Allies among the rebels… _A rebel… a rebel… where was she going to find a reb… her thoughts cut off and Cordelia smiled as she stood. She was no Wonder Woman, but Angel trusted her with the mission. And if she couldn't be Wonder Woman, then she could find out if one Wonder Woman wanted to stay and fight the good fight. Then, she had to go search for another - she had a rogue Slayer to find…

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

"Tsk, tsk, tsk, Angel… you are making your host very put out…" a surprisingly jovial voice echoed through the chamber as the captive fought against his bonds. The blood dripped over his bare arms and wrists from where he'd struggled.

"Or shall I say… Liam?" the voice asked, humor alighting his eyes as he watched the dark-haired man glare up at him.

"Your life is going to be very different from here on out… and it depends on _you_ how much longer that is going to be…"

_"What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from."_

_– T.S. Eliot_

The End

**x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x:x**

**A/N: Evil, evil, evil… I know (grin)… I'm not quite sure I'm up for a sequel right at the moment since this took a ****LOT**** out of me. If that becomes the case, I just may have to write an alternate ending to this in order to pull it all together. But for now, I'm going to leave it open like this and see what my muse wants to do with it. PLEASE tell me how you liked this story, though. The more people tell me they liked it, the more likely I'll continue on with the next installment…**

**Quick note to Imzadi: How do you know that Lindsey didn't have TWO jobs during law school? I had three… and I wasn't paying the ridiculous amount of money that law school usually requires… :) Besides, I'd think something a little more "involved" like the zombie squad would catch the eye of the SP more than the mail room would… There's always more to a back story… ;) Anyways, fiction's fiction… :) I'm glad you stuck with it to the end! Thanks!**


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